He brought his arms down over her head and across her shoulders, pulling her in for a hug. “Morning.”
“Good morning. It’s a beautiful day,” she replied, happily.
He smiled down at her and then placed a kiss on the top of her head. “It’s even more beautiful because you’re in it. I can’t tell you how wonderful it’s been spending this last month together. Every day has been like a dream for me. I was always a loner. To tell you the truth, I worried that spending practically every minute of every day together, when we really didn’t know each other that well, would drive us apart. I thought you’d get sick of me. Or at least get annoyed that I stole the covers every night and hogged the bed.”
She smiled because he did steal the covers and hog the small bed on the bus. “I thought the same thing. I thought you’d run in the opposite direction as fast as you could after a few days on that noisy tour bus filled with so many people and different personalities. Plus, basically living with three kids for a month. That couldn’t have been easy.”
He looked at her as if she were crazy. “You know I love your nephew.” His smile widened, and he looked up to the sky. “Don’t even get me started on how adorable Tessa is. And Lucas is, by far, the most precocious kid I’ve ever met. I had a conversation with him about math. Math! What kid talks about math?”
She couldn’t help the laugh that flew from her mouth. “I know. He’s incredibly smart. And so cute with those big blue eyes and blond curls.”
“You have a wonderful circle of friends and family around you. I love how close everyone is.” He sighed with contentment. “I really loved waking up to your beautiful face every day. I could get used to that.” He glanced over her shoulder at New York City. “This place isn’t bad either.”
Her heart fluttered, and her eyes lit up with hope, because, for a moment, she thought he was considering moving to New York. But she quickly realized that it wasn’t what he meant when his brows furrowed together.
“My life is in California, Kira. My brother is there, and I need to keep an eye on him.” Brett took a deep breath, and the corners of his mouth curled up. “But I seriously wouldn’t mind spending some time in New York to be with you.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means we could fly back and forth to see each other. We could have long weekends together.”
She slowly shook her head and let out an exasperated sigh. “I can’t commit to that indefinitely,” she answered, honestly. She didn’t want to seem unyielding or stubborn, but she knew life always got in the way. “I need to be realistic about expectations and what the future holds.” She knew this scenario too well. She’d done the long-distance thing three times before, and, each time, the relationship ended the same way. Missed weekends caused hard feelings. Quality time turned argumentative. And too much time away from one another made the relationship fall apart.
The last thing she wanted to do was break ties with Brett, but she also didn’t want to commit to something that she knew neither one of them could stick to. She gave him a hopeful smile. “Let’s not make any solid plans or firm commitments, because, inevitably, one of us will break them and the other will be hurt and disappointed. Let’s just take it slow and see where it goes. Let’s let fate decide the direction of our lives.”
He exhaled a disappointed sigh. “If that’s all you’re gonna give me, I’ll take it. Because this isn’t over, Kira. We’re going to figure it out.”
She nodded, unsure if she believed him but willing to believe in his promise.
After a quick bite to eat at Pret A Manger, they crossed into the park. Serenity filled Kira’s heart, as it always did whenever she strolled along the path. It was still early, so there weren’t as many people, which made it more peaceful. The gentle sway of the trees, the chirping birds, and the squirrels zigzagging in front of them, all brought so much happiness into her life. “Don’t you just love it?” she asked Brett.
He quietly glanced at the greenery around him. “This is like nothing I ever expected to see in the middle of New York City. Was the whole island like this at one time?”
She nodded, a little sad that big business destroyed something so perfect. “I guess so, but New York built a good portion of the nation’s economy. The park is still almost a thousand acres, so I guess that’s a compromise. The north part of the park is a virtual forest. You saw it from my balcony.”
“Maybe, one day, we could walk the length of the park,” he said, slowly.
The suggestion, although something that Kira would love to look forward to, stirred up bittersweet feelings. She couldn’t make plans, because she had no idea if they’d ever pan out. Instead of stating the obvious, she just gave him a sad smile.
He understood and nodded.
They continued walking quietly and found themselves in front of the fountain. Brett stopped, dug his hand into his pocket and held up a coin. He stared at it for a long time without saying anything, then squeezed his eyes closed with deep concentration. When he opened them, there was a light sheen covering them that caught the reflection of the sun. The soft emotion in his rugged features seemed so out of place. He didn’t try to hide his vulnerability. It was clear to the naked eye. His heart was exposed. Visible to the world.
He flipped the coin into the fountain where it caused a small splash before it sunk to the bottom, along with dozens of other people’s dreams. He found another coin in his pocket and handed it to Kira. “Your turn.”
She swallowed hard and forced a smile, then took the coin and held it tightly in her fist. She wished for a chance. Not a miracle or divine intervention. Just a chance. That’s all she wanted. It didn’t have to work out, but she wanted to find out if it could. She threw the coin into the fountain and watched it float to the bottom and join Brett’s.
“I hope we wished for the same thing,” he said softly.
“I’m pretty sure we did.”
He dug into his pocket again and pulled out the rest of his change. It was a few dimes, a nickel, a quarter and four or five pennies. They took turns wishing on the coins and tossing them into the fountain until there were none left. She didn’t know how many wishes were below the water, but she knew that they each wished for the same thing over and over and over again.
A Town Car picked them up at 4:45 to take Brett to JFK. Kira insisted on it instead of an Uber, and she rode with him to the airport. Soft smiles were exchanged as they sat side by side with their fingers laced together. Kira gazed into Brett’s eyes and saw the longing and heartache behind them. It mirrored everything in her heart.
She had been struggling with her feelings for Brett, especially over the last week. She tried to deny it. She tried to tell herself that thinking about the tour coming to an end made her heart hurt because it was rapidly approaching, but she knew the real reason was that she fell hard and fast for Brett, and she didn’t want to say goodbye. They had been thrust into a relationship where they were together night and day, escalating the bond they shared. Where it probably would have taken most couples several months to get as close as they did, they accomplished it in several weeks.
She never believed people when they said they knew right away that their significant other was the one. Or that he or she was the one that got away. Now, Kira knew that those statements weren’t exaggerated. She hated that the latter was probably going to be true about Brett, and that’s what hurt the most.
Her chest squeezed at how much she cared about him. As she looked into his eyes, she knew he felt the same way. Yet, neither one of them wanted to admit the depth of their feelings out loud. She understood his hesitation. He probably thought it was too much too soon, but she had fallen in love with him. She didn’t know if he’d return those three little words, or if there’d be radio silence, but her heart told her that he’d say them. In a few minutes, they’d be at the airport and he’d return to California not knowing how she felt. If she was going to tell him, she needed to tell him now. This was her last chance.
She cupped his face in her hands and pushed her fingers through his beard. She scratched at his jaw with the tips of her fingers, and a teary-eyed smile spread across her cheeks as she gazed at him and tried to find the courage to say the words. He held onto her wrists, gently massaging the delicate skin with the pads of his thumbs, and smiled back at her. She swallowed hard. “I love you, Brett.”
His smile immediately dropped into a straight line, and, for a moment, she thought he wasn’t going to say it back to her, but then his eyes watered, and his brow wrinkled with emotion. “I love you too, Kira.”
Happiness filled every pore of her body and an excited laugh bubbled over her lips. The light laugh morphed into a small sob, which she choked back as she covered her mouth with her hand. “This is crazy. I have no idea how this is supposed to work, but we have to make it work, Brett. We have to.”
“I don’t know how to do this either. But we’ll find a way.” His kiss conveyed the passion in his heart. He breathed deeply through his nose as his lips devoured hers, and she melted into his chest.
With his arms enveloped around her, she was lost in his massive embrace. She felt protected and safe, and she knew that somehow, they’d figure it out. At least that’s what she hoped, because she couldn’t envision any other outcome.
The car stopped at the curb, along with Kira’s heart. They had seconds to say goodbye. She clung to him and never wanted to let go, but he wanted to look into her face.
He cupped her cheeks and studied her features. “I’ll call you as soon as I land.”
“You better.” She blinked back the tears, refusing to cry. It felt as if they’d just said goodbye in Chicago, only this time, her heart shattered into a million pieces.
“I wish you could come with me,” he said.
“I wish you could stay.”
They clung to one another as if they would never see each other again. Their lips pressed together in a long closed-mouth kiss, reveling in the closeness of their bodies. She memorized every brush of his beard on her skin and the way his strong hands rested on her back. She felt his breath on her cheek and the way his fingertips pressed into her flesh.
As they stood there and shared their last kiss goodbye, there was no holding back the tears that escaped her eyes and rolled down her cheek. When their lips parted, her vision was blurred, and her breath quivered as she inhaled.
“Please don’t cry.” His brow was wrinkled, and his lips were pressed together, clearly fighting his own emotions.
“I’m not,” she promised, resting her hand in the center of his chest to feel his heart. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
There were no goodbyes. The verbal declaration that they loved each other was the perfect send off. She watched him go through the revolving door, wheeling his small suitcase and carrying his duffle bag over his shoulder. He paused to blow her a kiss, and then he was gone.
The ride home was filled with such bittersweet emotions that it left Kira’s head reeling. She was dizzy with newfound love and excited to finally experience what everyone around her had. She wanted a partner in life. Companionship. Someone who shared her crazy passion for music and her insane schedule. The only thing Brett didn’t share was her geography. He traveled for his job. She traveled for hers. Could they possibly coordinate a life together? It sounded so freaking absurd now that she thought about it. With her thoughts spiraling, she leaned her head back onto the leather seat and stared up at the roof of the vehicle. Tears welled in her eyes and threatened to fall, but she inhaled sharply to keep them at bay. She was not going to let them dampen this wonderful moment that she waited a lifetime for. Her hand fell onto the empty seat next to her, where Brett had sat less than 15 minutes earlier, and she felt his presence. She immediately pulled her phone out of her pocket. Suddenly giddy, laughter floated from her mouth as she texted him.
KIRA: We’re in love! ♥♥♥
BRETT: ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
BRETT: I’m booking a ticket back to New York as soon as I get home.
KIRA: I’m booking a ticket to California as soon as I get home. Hope we don’t miss each other!
BRETT: Not a chance. Boarding now. Call you in a few hours. I ♥ you.
KIRA: I ♥ you too!
She tucked her phone into her bag with a crazy smile on her face, feeling on top of the world and ready to conquer the long-distance gap in their lives. When she got home, she went straight to Audra’s apartment and burst through the door. Throwing her arms up toward the ceiling, she exclaimed, “We’re in love!”
Audra, who had been reading something on her iPad, jumped and almost dropped the device. Once she recovered, her face lit up and her mouth opened into a giant oval, then she wrapped Kira in a suffocating hug. “I’m so happy for you! You and Brett are perfect for one another. Is he moving here?”
The smile on Kira’s face wilted slightly, but that’s all it took for her sister to immediately react.
“Nooo. No. No.” Audra cupped Kira’s chin in her hand. “Put that beautiful smile back on your face. This is wonderful. You’re in love!”
“Who’s in love?” Jimmy asked, as he passed through the room with Mason, dueling with a pair of drumsticks.
“Aunt Kira and Brett,” Mason answered. “Even I know that.”
His statement put the smile back on Kira’s lips. “Is it that obvious?”
He flashed the signature Wilder smile. “Everyone knows it, Aunt Kira. You two are all starry eyed like in one of those romance movies Aunt Mary always watches.”
Mason was comparing her relationship with Brett to a fairytale love story, and it made her heart bloom.
Jimmy walked up to her, and she expected a hug. Instead, he stuffed the drumstick in his back pocket and played a happy beat on her upper arm with his hands. “Congrats. Glad to hear it. It’s about time you settle down and have some babies.”
She was shocked at the statement, but then her heart melted, and her smile turned dreamy. The fantasy she had in the drum room yesterday returned, and she imagined that she and Brett were married, living across the hall with a couple of kids. Mason’s voice interrupted her thoughts and she wondered how long she’d been spacing out.
“That would be really cool. But I think you two,” Mason motioned to his parents with the drumstick, “are the ones who need to have some babies.”
Audra and Jimmy turned to one another with wide eyes, unsure how to answer. Before they had a chance to say anything, Aunt Mary entered the room.
“What’s going on?” Aunt Mary asked. “I heard some happy congratulations.”
“My sister is in love!” Audra announced, similar to the way Kira announced it when she walked into the apartment.
Aunt Mary’s hands went to her cheeks. “Oh, my! I’m so happy for you, dear. That boy is very nice. He could use a shave though,” she teased. “Do you know that he brought me a cup of tea and a sandwich when we were on the bus one day? He brought it all the way upstairs for me!”
Kira cocked her head to the side. “No. When did he do that?”
“In Charlotte. Everyone was still at the venue and he came back early. I was downstairs ready to make myself something to eat when I heard a ruckus upstairs. It was Tessa arguing with the boys because she wanted to watch one of her Disney movies and they were playing video games. So I went right upstairs and left everything on the table. Next thing I knew he was in the playroom holding a tray with a sandwich and a cup of tea. He even brought cookies and milk for the little ones.” Aunt Mary’s hand went to her chest. “I was touched that he went out of his way like that. He seems like a real family man.”
Kira had no idea that he’d done that. It reminded her that there were still so many things she didn’t know about him. Like his relationship with his brother or his life in California. She bit her lip and scrolled through her phone. No message from Brett yet. She wondered if he was going to tell his brother that he was in love with her. Or hi
s friends. She wondered if he was as close to his brother as she was with Audra, and if he was as close to the guys from Bulletproof as she was to Immortal Angel. She didn’t know the answer to any of those questions, and she wanted to. She wanted to know it all. He knew so much more about her life than she knew about his, and it bothered her. When he called, she’d tell him so. Then she remembered her text in the car. Smiling secretively, she excused herself, slipped into the bathroom for privacy and booked a flight to California for the following weekend.
Kira practically ran off the plane the moment the “fasten seatbelt” sign went off. She pushed past the other passengers with the rudeness and impatience of a typical New Yorker, which couldn’t be more uncharacteristic of her. She stretched her neck to look for him when she was on the escalator, when she really wanted to shove everyone out of her way. A glimpse of bright pink roses caught her attention, then a dark beard made an appearance, and she practically squealed with excitement. Waving her arm like a lunatic, she watched his face light up when he noticed her.
She rushed down the last few steps of the escalator and flew into his embrace. He dropped the flowers, lifted her off the floor and kissed her with a ferocity that she felt in her bones. Seeing him after a week apart, when she was used to seeing him every day, made her heart soar. The way his hands ran across her back and through her hair ignited every nerve ending inside her body, and she realize just how much she missed him.
He set her down on her feet but still held onto her arms and beamed at her, the balls of his cheeks round from his smile. His beard was a bit scraggly, which she found even sexier than before. She clung to him, running her hands up and down his biceps, instantly remembering every curve of his flexed muscles. They stared at one another, each holding onto the other while their eyes searched the other’s face as if it had been months, not days, since they’d last seen one another.
The Roadie: Radical Rock Stars Book 7 Page 13