by Karen Lynch
“Give her a minute,” Chris said, and I looked up to see the private investigator watching me with barely-concealed excitement.
“How did you find me?”
I hadn’t been in Maine that long. Before that I was at a Mohiri stronghold. I didn’t use social media, and no one here knew about my past. How could an investigator track me down so quickly, no matter how good he was?
He pulled another picture from the envelope and handed it to me. It was slightly out of focus but clear enough to make out my face and the face of the person standing beside me, his hand laid possessively on my shoulder. Blood roared in my ears, and the edges of my vision darkened as the photo slipped from my fingers. I was dimly aware of Chris talking to me and his hand rubbing my back.
It took me a few minutes to recover from the panic attack. I hadn’t had one in weeks, and this was a bad one. Seeing Eli again had sent me back to the place that spawned every one of my nightmares, and I had to remind myself over and over that he was dead.
“I apologize. I had no idea the picture would upset you so much.”
I looked at the investigator. Nodding weakly, I forced myself to pick up the photo again and lay it on the coffee table.
“Where did you get that?” I asked him. It looked like a nightclub, but I’d been in so many with Eli they’d blurred together.
“That was taken at the Oasis night club in Portland last September by a man named Preston Bruce. Mr. Bruce is originally from Raleigh, and he went to high school with Emma Chase – you. He recognized you and took a picture with his cell phone to show his friends back home. The picture made it into Marie Chase’s hands, and she forwarded it to me. I’ve been focusing my efforts on Portland since then.”
Preston Bruce. The name didn’t ring a bell, but there had been over a thousand people in my school. And that had been a lifetime ago.
I remembered the club, though. Eli had brought me to Portland with him, looking for Sara, and he’d taken me to a few clubs to be his lure if he found a girl that met his eye. After a week or so, he’d left me at home and gone out with Joel instead, a decision that had saved my life. I hadn’t been at the house when the Mohiri raided it, and after that, I’d taken off for Vegas, thinking Eli was dead.
Mark shook his head. “It was sheer luck that I ran across you that day in Portland. I’d pretty much written off Portland, but your sister wanted me to give it one more try. When I saw you and your friend coming out of an art store, I was surprised, to say the least. I followed you to lunch and then here. After that, I started looking into your identity. This building is owned by a Sara Grey and you went by the name Emma Grey. I found out you moved here from Syracuse, New York, but I could find no trace of you there. It was like you didn’t exist before a few months ago.”
“I’m not sure I did,” I said almost to myself.
No one spoke for a long moment.
I gave the investigator a hard look. “Why didn’t you just ask me instead of making me think I had a crazy stalker after me? Why did you send that guy Keith to talk to me – if that really is his name?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry for that. I’ve honestly never dealt with a situation like this, and I wasn’t sure how to handle it. I wasn’t aware you’d seen me after that time in Portland, and I should have been more careful. As for Keith, I thought he’d be less conspicuous in a club full of college students. He’s my nephew. I normally work with my associate Pamela.”
“Is she blonde, in her thirties?” I asked.
Mark’s face registered his surprise. “How do you know that?”
“She came into the diner one day. I wouldn’t have noticed her except she said she was from Minnesota but she had no accent. Then I saw her in her car after my shift. It freaked me out a bit.”
He nodded wryly. “Pamela usually helps me with runaway cases. She’s good with teenagers, but I’m thinking she was in over her head on this one.”
I gave him a small smile. “I’m not good with strangers. I don’t think anyone would have done a better job.”
He leaned forward again. “Emma, I have to know. How are you here, looking like you haven’t aged a day in twenty years? Where have you been all this time?”
I looked to Chris for guidance because I had no idea how to answer the man’s questions. My story was so incredible that I’d find it hard to believe in his shoes.
Chris smiled. “Go ahead. Mark knows about vampires and demons.”
I sucked in a sharp breath at hearing Chris speak so bluntly about it. Most humans had no idea about the real world around them.
Mark nodded. “I’ve been a PI for fifteen years, and I’ve seen a lot more than I ever wanted to. When your sister hired me, and I started digging into your disappearance, I suspected it could be vampires, but I had no proof. Not that I could have told anyone that. People would have thought I was delusional, and I would have lost my license.”
He rested his elbows on his knees. “You can be assured that whatever you tell me will be kept in the strictest confidence, unless you give me permission to share it.”
“How do I know I can trust you?”
His eyes darted to Chris. “Your friend here has made it clear it’s in my best interest to exercise discretion in this case.”
I wrapped my arms around myself, but there was no way to prepare for talking about what had happened to me.
“I was at a club with my friends when I met him, and I remember being surprised that an older guy like him would be interested in me. I was drinking and stupid, and he convinced me to go outside for some air. We were in the parking lot when he…he showed me that he was a vampire. I tried to run, but he was too fast. He knocked me out, and when I woke up again, I was in a strange house.”
My heart began to pound, and bile rose in my throat as I relived the horrors of that first night with Eli, thinking I was going to die. Praying for it. But Eli knew exactly how far to go without killing me, and he kept me alive so he could amuse himself night after night.
“You don’t have to do this if it’s too hard,” Chris said gently.
“I need to.” Marie would never know how much I’d suffered at Eli’s hands, but my sister deserved to know how I’d disappeared and where I’d been since then. I rubbed my shaking hands together and continued my story.
“Eli held me there for a week before he changed me. The police were looking for me in North Carolina, so he took me to his place in New York where we stayed for a few years. I wasn’t allowed to go out, and I never challenged him. He was old and strong, and I was a new vampire. He told me he owned me, and I believed him.”
Mark paled. “Jesus.”
“Eli kept me with him all these years, up until last fall. I came to Portland with him, looking for someone. We got separated and I thought he was dead, so I ran.”
I could see the question burning in Mark’s eyes. He ran a hand over his bald head and asked what I knew was coming next.
“How are you here now? I don’t know a lot about vampires, but I’ve heard there’s no coming back from that. Yet, you’re human…” He faltered. “You are human, aren’t you?”
“Yes, I am.” My mind raced for an answer for him. I wouldn’t tell him or anyone else about Sara because that might put her in danger. I had to come up with something that sounded plausible, but no one would be able to verify.
“I ran into a faerie in Vegas. She could have killed me, but she saved me instead. Somehow, she was able to make me human again.”
Mark did a double take. “Faeries are real, too?”
“Very.” Chris nodded slowly. “They normally keep to themselves, but this one took a liking to Emma.”
He nudged me with his shoulder. When I looked up, he smiled at me.
“My people were there when Emma was healed, and we took her to live with us. She was welcome to stay as long as she wished, but she wanted to live among humans again.”
Mark’s eyes widened even more, and he stared at Chris. “
You’re…not human? You said you were a vampire hunter, so I thought…”
“I am a vampire hunter. I’m just not human.”
“What are you?”
Chris lifted a shoulder. “I’m a warrior who is strong enough and fast enough to fight a vampire. That’s all I can tell you.”
The investigator rubbed his face with his hands. “This is incredible. If I wasn’t looking at Emma, I’d think it a fantastic story.”
“Our world is too much for most humans to accept as real,” Chris said. “You can count yourself among the few who know the truth.”
“I’m not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing,” Mark replied. He looked at me. “Why didn’t you try to find your family and let them know you’re alive?”
A weight settled on my chest. “How would I explain my not aging to my family and friends? You know the media would pick up a story of a missing person coming home. I’d be a freak, and they wouldn’t leave me alone. And how could I tell my little sister and my parents I spent the last twenty years as a monster? Because that’s what I was. I have to live with that for the rest of my life. I don’t want that for them.”
Silence fell over the room. There wasn’t much anyone could say in response. The demon had used my body to kill countless people, many of them girls just like me. You couldn’t sugarcoat that, and you couldn’t pretend it never happened.
Mark spoke first. “I’ve met a lot of people who’ve been through horrendous experiences. Your situation is different, but like them, you were the victim in all this. That vampire stole you from your family and made you one of them. You are not to blame here.”
“That’s what we keep telling her,” Chris said.
“Your sister is an amazing woman, and she’s spent most of her life trying to find out what happened to you. She loves you, and I don’t think she’ll rest until she finds you.” Mark’s voice grew softer. “Don’t you think it’s kinder to let her know you’re alive than to let her always wonder your fate?”
Tears scalded my cheeks, and I couldn’t speak around the tightness in my throat. I jumped up from the couch and ran from the living room. Instead of going to my bedroom, I went upstairs and climbed the stairs to the roof. The air in the apartment felt suffocating, and I needed to be outdoors.
The cushion on the wicker couch was still wet from last night’s rain, so I sat on the roof with my back to the ledge. The sun was warm on my face, but it did little to melt the lump of ice in my chest. I’d already been tired and overwhelmed when I got home. After talking to Mark Rowan, I felt brittle, like a strong wind could blow me apart and scatter me.
Marie. God, how many times I’d thought about her since I was healed. I’d been close to my mom and dad, but Marie was my little sister. I was supposed to be there for her, to give her advice and to watch out for her. I’d failed her and left her alone without a big sister. And she’d been looking for me ever since.
How could I continue to let her suffer? But how could I tell her what I’d done? Mark knew about vampires, but he hadn’t said if Marie did. Most humans wouldn’t be able to sleep at night if they knew what was out there. Was it right to expose Marie to the cruelty of that world? And my parents? There was no way I could face them and tell them what had happened to me.
“I’ve never been up here. Nice view.”
I opened my eyes to look at Chris. “Is he still here?”
“No. He left his card for you. He promised not to say anything to your sister for a few days, but he’ll have to tell her eventually. The question is, where do you go from here?”
I pulled my knees up and rested my forehead on them. “I don’t know what to do.”
Chris sat on the ledge beside me. “Do you want to see her?”
“More than anything. But I don’t know if I can face her.”
He let out a quiet sigh. “I’ve seen a lot in my lifetime, but I can’t begin to imagine what you’ve been through. I don’t think anyone can. You’ve come a long way since Sara healed you, and I hope someday soon you’ll accept that you don’t deserve this guilt you carry around.”
I hugged my knees. “I know the demon did those things, not me.”
“Your mind knows it, but I don’t think your heart does. Maybe seeing your family again will help with that.”
“What if it doesn’t? What if Marie hates me?”
He slid down to sit beside me on the roof. “Your sister went through a lot to find you. According to Mark, he’s the third private investigator she’s hired in the last ten years. That sounds like a person who will love her sister no matter what. Do you really want your fear to get in the way of you two being together again?”
“No.” I lifted my head to look at him. “It won’t be the same as it was. She’s older than I am now. What if it’s too weird for us?”
A corner of his mouth lifted. “You went camping with a bunch of werewolves. I already think you’re weird.”
I gave him a teary smile. “You like the werewolves. You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“Is it working?”
“A little.”
“Good.” He stood and hauled me to my feet. “Sitting up here is not going to change anything. Have you eaten?”
“No.”
He tugged me toward the door to the attic. “You’re in luck because I’m a great cook, and I’m going to make us a huge breakfast.”
“I don’t know if I can eat,” I said right before my stomach growled.
“That’s because you haven’t had my French toast. It’s practically legendary and guaranteed to make you forget all your troubles.”
It would take a lot more than food to make me forget. I thought about Roland and wished he was here. Chris was good company, but Roland was the one I needed. All it would take was one phone call and he’d be here.
But that wouldn’t be fair to him. We couldn’t be together until I told him about my past, and I wasn’t ready to do that. I needed to see where things stood with Marie before I could think about my relationship with Roland. If there was a relationship left after he knew my secret.
Chapter 21
Roland
“Still no word?”
Pete joined me near the back wall of the meeting room as I checked my phone again. I’d gotten one text from Emma since I dropped her off yesterday, letting me know Chris had found the man who’d been following her and it had all been a misunderstanding. She didn’t elaborate, except to say she was safe and she’d explain later. I was relieved to hear she wasn’t in danger, but it worried me that she hadn’t said a word about us. If there was an us.
I rubbed at the ache in my chest. She couldn’t have found out about the imprint in a worse way. And then to discover I was the wolf she’d befriended and that I’d kept it from her. I’d waited too long to tell her, and I’d ended up making a mess of everything. I was afraid I’d lost her, and it was my own doing.
“No.” I stuck my phone in my back pocket. “I really screwed up this time.”
“I have to agree with you on that one.”
“Thanks.”
He ignored my scowl. “I get why you felt you had to wait to tell her about the imprint, with her being human and all, but why did you lie to her about your wolf?”
I groaned. “I don’t know. Stupidity.”
“Shannon thinks she’s upset about that more than anything else.”
“Shannon spoke to her?”
He shook his head. “Not since Sunday morning. April called Emma today, but Emma said she had to go to work. She said Emma sounded strange.”
Alarm filled me. “Strange how?”
“She only said Emma didn’t sound like herself. But can you blame her after what happened?”
My shoulders slumped. “No.”
Maxwell’s deep voice cut through the din in the room. “Is everyone here? Good. Let’s get this thing underway.”
Pete and I faced the front of the room filled with Beta candidates. Maxwell hadn’t told u
s why we were meeting today, but I suspected he was going to announce that he and Brendan had selected the Betas. I’d seen what looked like a list of names in Brendan’s hand when he’d arrived. The air of excitement in the room told me I wasn’t the only one expecting an announcement.
“I want to thank you for signing up for the Beta positions. Here in this room are some of the best hunters and fighters in the country, and I’m proud to call you my pack.”
Smiles broke out around the room, lightening the air of nervous excitement. There wasn’t a person here who didn’t want one of the coveted Beta slots. I hadn’t wanted to be a candidate at first, but over the last few weeks, I’d come to appreciate the importance of strong leadership in a pack. I was younger than most of the other candidates, but I thought I’d proven myself as well as anyone else.
“After considering the pack size and the distribution throughout the state, I decided to start with twelve Betas. We’ll have four here, in addition to Brendan, and the other eight will be responsible for our smaller communities around the state. If I think there is a need for more Betas down the road, I’ll choose from the remaining candidates.”
He held up a sheet of paper, and my stomach fluttered in anticipation. Beside me, Pete shifted from one foot to the other.
“If I call your name, come to the front and stand to my left. As soon as we’re done here, Brendan and I will go over your new responsibilities with you.”
He peered at the list in his hand. “Francis Kelly.”
Pete and I shared a look as people clapped. Neither of us was surprised our cousin had made the list, but he was going to be even more impossible now.
“Sheila Reid.”
I clapped loudly as Sheila walked proudly to stand beside Francis. She’d just become the first female Beta in the country, and that had to feel pretty damn good.
“Peter Kelly.”
Pete’s mouth fell open.