by Aly Martinez
“I do. She’s fucking amazing. I fear sometimes my girls love her more than they do me.”
“Think I can get her number?”
“Sure.” Lark cupped my shoulder. “Rhion, give Levitt your number.”
Jude blinked.
I smiled huge. “I’d be happy to watch her.”
“Um…” He stalled, flashing his gaze to Lark. “Is the babysitter gig a piece of you?”
“No. Lark thinks I’m a tattoo artist.”
Lark looked at me in disgust. “I’m sorry. I think you’re a tattoo artist? Are you not?”
I patted his arm. “Of course I am, honey.” I tossed Jude a wink that made him chuckle. “All I meant is that babysitting is a real piece of me. I love kids. I keep Lark’s girls at least once a month. And I sit for Leo and Sarah sometimes, too.”
“Holy shit,” Lark breathed. “If you don’t do tattoos, are you seriously a stripper?”
“Shh…” I urged, leveling him with a glare that made Jude’s chuckle become a belly laugh.
Lark turned his disbelief on Jude.
To which Jude shrugged and said, “Mum’s the word.”
I didn’t know much about Jude. Whether he was a Republican or Democrat. If he liked football or baseball. If he liked his eggs scrambled or fried. But, right then, a piece of me fell in love with him.
Lark cussed under his breath, and I felt him staring at me, but my gaze remained anchored to Jude’s smirking face.
A few seconds later, Johnson announced that team meetings were about to start and Lark got up and left. Jude never tore his eyes off me as he folded out of his chair and then rose to his feet.
My heart pounded in my chest as I watched him bend, his mouth heading toward me. I prepared myself by licking my lips. He was going to kiss me. I was sure of it.
He didn’t.
But what he did do was whisper in my ear, “It was me.”
“What?” I breathed, swaying toward him.
His hand caught the back of my neck. “The third guy. That was me.”
My breath caught.
“One of your so-called friends is avoiding you. Another is talking shit behind your back. And another wants to fuck you so hard that his balls are aching.”
A fire consumed me as he right himself. The kind of fire that burned within and only he could extinguish.
“Jude,” I whispered.
He dropped his hand, but I still felt it on the back of my head as if he’d branded me. The sweetest burn of all.
“I’ll get your number from Lark and text you the details about Saturday.”
If the hummingbirds in my stomach were any indication, the second I opened my mouth, a short story was going to come out. I saved myself the embarrassment and him the time by going with a short nod.
Chapter Fifteen
Jude
“It’ll be fine,” she assured.
“I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right,” I told the windshield of my Jeep as I drove toward Guardian.
Val’s hand landed on my forearm and she squeezed. “Seriously, Jude. Chill. I’m eleven. The worst that could happen is she allows me to watch an R-rated movie.”
Or my worst nightmare could become a reality and I’ll find you both hanging out of the balcony window with flames shooting out around you.
Lark, Leo, and Sarah all assured me that Rhion was the best of the best when it came to kids, but I was still on edge about leaving Val.
However, part of that probably had more to do with Val than it did Rhion.
Ever since I’d picked her up at the airport the night before, she’d been acting strange.
She was too quiet. Too withdrawn. Too…not Val.
My bubbly girl with the infectious smile I’d left in LA only a few weeks earlier was not at all the sullen preteen I’d met at the airport. Sure, she’d thrown her arms around my neck and hugged me just as hard as she always had, but that was where the similarities ended.
Valerie had always been thick. Her father was a three-hundred-pound former NFL linebacker. I’d figured it was genetic. It wasn’t as though she were a couch potato. She’d been a stand-out Little League softball player. However, when I’d met her at the arrival gate, it had been easy to see she’d put on a few pounds. That wasn’t the worrisome part though. For me, the alarm bells were ringing because she’d gained it so fast. It had only been weeks since I’d seen her last.
And then there was the fact that she’d had a stroke when I’d told her to change into something nice when we were getting ready to go to Rhion’s. My little girl, who used to love dresses and all things pink, had packed exactly three different outfits to come to my place for the long weekend: a gray track suit, a black track suit, and a navy-blue track suit. And every single one of them was a size too big.
Her hair was another huge difference. Val’s father was African American, and despite the fact that April had long, straight, blond hair, she’d gotten his dark curls. This time last year, Val would have spent an hour in the bathroom with a million different products and tools, straightening her hair into sleek locks that looked like her mom’s. Now, it was pulled up into a ponytail, which I couldn’t swear she had combed.
I knew she got enough shit about her appearance from her mother, so I’d decided to keep my opinions to myself, but I would talk to April about it the first chance I got.
“Smartass, I let you watch R-rated movies.”
She smiled up at me. “I know. That’s why you’re my favorite.”
God, I’d missed that smile. At least that was still the same.
“So listen, there’s something I need to tell you about Rhion.”
She ducked away from me until I lost my hold on her neck. “What kind of stupid name is Rhion for a girl anyway? That’s a boy’s name.”
“Hey,” I scolded, flicking my gaze to her. “Don’t call someone’s name stupid. She didn’t get to pick it any more than you did Valerie.”
“Whatever. It’s still stupid,” she mumbled under her breath as she stared out the window.
“Don’t whatever me. You know good and damn well that is not how we talk about people.”
“Right. Sorry,” she muttered sarcastically at the window.
Christ, if this was eleven, the real teenage years were going to be a bitch.
“All right. What’s going on with you? I bit my tongue when you ignored me all morning to play on your phone, but now…”
She didn’t even turn to look at me.
“Val,” I called.
She continued to ignore me.
I raised my voice. “Valerie!”
Nothing.
I squeezed the ticklish spot right above her knee.
“Stop!” she laughed, swatting my hand away.
“Oh, look. There she is!” I teased. “Glad you could finally join me.”
She laughed for a second longer before sobering. In a snotty voice, she snipped, “That was completely uncalled for.”
I barked a loud laugh. “Holy hell, you sound like your mother.”
She started giggling all over again. “I know! I’ve been perfecting that one all week.” She shimmied up straighter in her seat. “Listen to this one.” She dramatically cleared her throat. “Good Lord, Valerie. Take that hat off. You look like Justin Bieber.” Then she finished in April’s voice with, “Only fat and with no style.”
I sucked in a sharp breath and kept my hand on her knee as my other clamped hard around steering wheel. That chat with April just got moved up from the first chance I got to the minute I could get Val out of earshot.
“You’re beautiful,” I said immediately. “Your mom… She’s…”
I knew that April had talked crap about me after the divorce, but I’d refused to ever follow her down that path. Especially where Val was concerned. But how did I say, Your mother is a raving, self-centered bitch who doesn’t deserve to stand in the same room with you, much less be called a mom, without it sounding bad?
“So, what do
I need to know about Rhion?” she asked when I didn’t finish my thought.
I gritted my teeth and did my best to keep the blistering rage out of my voice as I growled, “Your mom’s wrong.”
She once again attempted to steer the conversation away from her. “I guess Rhion could be a girl’s name. How’s she spell it?”
“Val,” I bit out as I pulled into the underground garage at Guardian. After putting the Jeep in park, I undid my seatbelt and twisted in my seat to face her. Leaning my back against the door, I ordered, “Look at me.”
Her dark-brown gaze lifted to mine, and it felt like a razor blade slicing through me.
Tears sparkled in her eyes as she whispered, “I don’t want to talk about Mom anymore.”
“That’s fine. You don’t have to talk. But you gotta listen to me for a minute. You know I’d never tell you to disrespect your mother. But there are certain times where I am gonna tell you to ignore her.” I cupped her jaw and tipped her head back. “This is one of those times, baby. She says stupid shit sometimes. But that’s on her—not you. Your mom’s spent her entire life trying to make you just like her, and the older you get, the clearer it’s becoming that you aren’t her mini me. You’re better.”
“Psssh. Yeah, right,” she scoffed, trying to look away.
I tightened my hold and forced her gaze to remain on me. “Trust me, baby. I’m a man. Women are my specialty. And I’m telling you right here, right now. Your mom is wrong. You’re one of the most beautiful girls I’ve ever seen. And, if anyone ever tries to tell you differently, they’re gonna have to deal with me.”
Her lips disappeared as she sucked them into her mouth and fought tears back.
“Tell me you understand, Val,” I pushed.
She didn’t say anything, but she nodded and lifted her hand to cover mine at her jaw.
“Good,” I soothed. “Now, I’m gonna have a talk with your mom tonight. I don’t want you worrying about that, either.”
“No! What if she—”
“She’s not going to take you away from me. It’ll be fine. Trust me.”
A tear finally escaped her eye as she said, “Okay.”
I grinned and shifted my hand down to her neck. “Now, quit cryin’, crazy. You’re on vacation.”
She sniffled and repeated, “Okay.”
I touched my lips to her forehead before swinging my door open and folding out. After grabbing her messenger bag out of the backseat, she met me at the bumper.
“Thanks, Jude,” she whispered, looping an arm around my hips.
I draped mine over her shoulders and smarted, “Oh, don’t try being polite now. I was getting used to you ignoring me.”
She giggled, and together, we strolled to the elevator.
“Hey, Jude,” she said softly as I pressed the button to the third floor.
“Yeah, baby?”
“You, umm…think, maybe…um…we could go shopping while I’m here? It’s just I hate going with Mom.”
I smirked and looked down at her. “I don’t shop, Val.”
“Oh, yeah. Sorry.” She tipped her head at the ground and became enthralled with her shoes.
“But, if my girl wants to go shopping, I’m gonna take her shopping.”
Her head snapped up, her round face beaming at me. “Really?”
I chuckled. “I’m offended by how surprised you look right now.”
When the doors to the elevator opened, we both stepped off.
“Good. I need some new bras. We can get those, right?” she asked.
I nearly choked on my tongue as we walked to Rhion’s door. “Uh…”
I wasn’t much of a shopper. But I really wasn’t much of a shopper when it came to buying bras for my preteen daughter.
She giggled. “I’m kidding.”
I blew a ragged breath out, which made her laugh louder.
While knocking on the door, I attempted to silence her with a glower, but I could feel the smile pulling at my lips.
It wasn’t until the door opened that I realized I’d never had that talk with Val about Rhion.
“Holy crap!” she gasped.
Rhion was wearing a pair of jeans and a short-sleeved, v-neck T-shirt, exposing not only the tattoos on her arms, but also the ones across her chest, which stopped slightly under her collarbone. My eyes were instantly drawn to the subtle cleavage.
But that’s not what Val saw.
“She has scars like you, Jude.”
My lips thinned and I flashed a pair of wide eyes at Rhion in apology.
She shot a pair right back in my direction, but a smile split her face.
After Rhion had left the office the day before, I hadn’t been able to get her off my mind. In my nightmares, I’d always thought of her as that broken butterfly teetering on the edge of death. But, after ten minutes with that crazy woman, I knew I couldn’t have been more wrong. She was very much alive. Her laugh. Her smile. Her sense of humor. Anyone would tell you Rhion Park was gorgeous. But, when she opened her mouth, it was a different kind of beauty. The kind that had a way of working under a man’s skin.
Later that night, Rhion and I had exchanged a very formal thread of text messages. It was strange. It seemed, for a woman who talked in paragraphs, she typed in single syllables. Yes. No. Fine. I think the longest thing I got from her was, Okay. See you then. She could be as short as she wanted to be though; I wasn’t going to back down.
Rational thought had died in that stairwell. The moment I’d lost sight of her out the door, I knew I’d follow her. The second I’d seen Johnson standing there, I had known I’d fight for her. And the moment she’d smiled up at me, I had known I’d run a mile through broken glass to keep it aimed at me.
Long story short: I was fucked.
I wanted her. And not just with my hands and my mouth—though I couldn’t deny that was part of it. My body came alive for that woman. But, with Rhion, I wanted more. I wanted to know what she’d been up to for the last four years. Was she happy? What was she doing in Chicago? What did she actually do for a living? Why was she so private? Did that night haunt her dreams too? And, most of all, had she thought about me even a fraction of how often I had her over the years?
On one hand, I was worried that pursuing anything with her was astronomically stupid. On the other hand, I couldn’t stop myself.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to… Crap.” Val looked up at me apologetically. “That was probably rude.”
I opened my mouth to tell her it absolutely was, but Rhion got there first.
“Nah, it wasn’t rude.” She stepped out of the way and motioned for us to come inside. “If I were ashamed, I’d cover them. But I don’t believe in long-sleeve shirts. I paid way too much money for this ink to hide it.” She shoved a colorful arm in Val’s direction.
Val dragged a finger down one of the skillfully hidden seams of puckered flesh on Rhion’s forearm.
The memory slammed into my brain as so many had over the last week. They were soft.
Not at all like the hard, raised flesh at the back of my head. But, then again, she’d probably worn her compression garments as the doctor had recommended.
Meanwhile, for the first year, I’d grown my hair out and done anything and everything I could to forget.
“How’d you get them?” Val asked.
Rhion’s gaze bounced to mine.
I shook my head.
Valerie knew all about my nightmares—probably more than April did. She knew about my Butterfly. But she didn’t know about my failures that had earned us both those scars. And I was nowhere near ready to cop to those in front of the little girl who thought I’d hung the moon.
“Well…” Rhion started, glancing back down to Val. “A few years ago, I got into a fight with a bear. He was a real jerk who thought he could walk up to my campsite and steal my picnic basket. Clearly, he underestimated how much I like to eat. I walked away with these. But he’s now the world’s first hairless bear. Don’t worry. I gave him th
e name of my tattoo artist and she inked him on some pants.”
Her gaze drifted back up to me, a gorgeous grin pulling at her lips, a light dancing in her eyes, which nearly knocked me back a step.
Fuck. This woman.
“Nuh-uh,” Val laughed as something weird happened in my chest.
I wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but it felt as though a single PSI of pressure had been released from inside me. It had been so long since I’d felt even an ounce of relief, and that tiny amount might as well have been a boulder. And all it had taken was an absurd story and a smile to make it happen.
“You can go put your stuff on the couch. I made some cookies. They’re still warm if you want to grab one out of the kitchen,” Rhion told Val.
“Awesome,” Val replied, turning to hug my hips before hurrying away.
Rhion crossed her arms over her chest and rubbed her biceps for warmth. Shyly peering up at me through her long, painted-black lashes, she whispered, “Hey.”
Fuck, shy was cute on her. It was almost better than the flirty and the crazy she’d given me the day before. Almost.
“Hey,” I returned with a smirk.
Taking the hint, I stepped in and closed the door.
Her painted nails toyed with her necklace as though she didn’t know how to act around me. And, truth be told, I wasn’t sure, either. We’d shared something. A lot of somethings, actually. Most of them bad, but in the last week, some of them had been really fucking good. So good that I was willing to risk destroying the only woman I’d ever needed to protect in order to have that good again.
I hooked an arm around her shoulders and pulled her against my chest.
She came willingly, her hand landing on my abs as she molded around me.
I looked over the top of her head to see Valerie watching us, a grin coloring her face as she flashed her gaze down to Rhion and then back to me.
I scowled, but only to keep from grinning back at her.
“I gotta go, babe,” I mumbled to Rhion as I released her. “But we gotta talk about shit before I do.”
She sucked in a deep breath and reluctantly stepped away. “Um…what kind of shit?”