“No,” she murmured, loving the rough texture of his fingers on her skin.
He played with a nipple, twisting gently before lowering for a kiss. His hand kept on its downward journey to her stomach and then to her hip. “You make me feel like a randy teenager.”
“Is that good?”
“Oh, baby. You have no idea.” His fingers inched lower, massaging her clit, while he continued to suck on her nipple.
“I might have—” she gasped “—some idea.” And she did, because he was driving her mental with his tongue and touch.
“I doubt it.” He parted her pussy lips, stroking her there, spreading arousal with the flat of his hand.
“Thad...”
“You drive me crazy.” He corkscrewed two fingers inside of her, making her moan. He pressed his thumb down on her clit, in that way she loved, while he worked another finger inside of her.
“Thad, I’m not kidding...”
“Neither am I.” He bit her nipple while moving his hand faster between her legs.
It was wonderful. Excruciatingly wonderful.
“Please.”
“Please what, sweetheart?” He wriggled his fingers inside of her until she was writhing beneath him.
“Oh, please!” Her hips flew off the bed, meeting his hand, thrust for thrust as she rolled her head back and forth across the pillow in delicious frustration.
“You’re not the only one who can tease.”
“Thad!”
He withdrew his hand and climbed back on top of her. “Say it.” His voice was low and formidable.
“Say what?”
“Tell me what you’re begging for.” He wedged his thigh between her legs and moved it back and forth creating wonderfully frustrating friction.
It was too good. Too much. She writhed beneath him and begged, “Make love to me. Please, Thad. Make love to me.”
He stilled.
Jo did, too. She opened her eyes and gazed up into his face. Stone cold and serious.
Had she said the wrong thing?
Thad’s expression changed; it softened into a gentle frown before an irreverent light came into his eyes. “Seeing as you asked so nicely...”
He moved quickly, so quickly she wasn’t prepared. Flipping her onto her tummy, Thad raised her hips, pulled her close and thrust.
All the way.
There it was!
Elbows on the bed, her ass in the air, the new position sent brand-new vibrations through her, igniting a bonfire to show Thad the way home. And he found it. Again and again and again. One hand tightened on her shoulder and the other gripped her hip as he pulled her close for one last thrust, his body jerking behind hers just as she saw starbursts behind her own closed lids.
“Jo-lie...” His breath was ragged in her ear as he covered her back with his body, holding her close. Keeping her in his arms, he rolled the two of them together to their sides. They lay there panting as Thad absently caressed her hip.
After a few minutes, Thad snuggled her against him, sighing into her hair and murmuring words of wonder and contentment.
Holy.
In, out. In, out. Jolie was still in the process of catching her breath,
What the hell had just happened?
Um...the best sex of her life, that’s what.
* * *
THAD STOOD NAKED at the bathroom sink, the water running, staring at his reflection.
“What the hell are you doing?” he asked the man in the mirror.
No answer.
Figured.
For a man who always had answers, even if that answer was run!, not knowing what to do was a very bad sign. For over a decade, Thad had lived by a very strict set of rules, ones that only he was privy to. They included never getting involved with a woman past one night of pleasure. So, what had happened?
Make love to me.
He could still hear her voice, like she was standing right behind him, whispering. One part sweetness, the other part harlot. The two sides of her a delicious combination that he couldn’t get enough of.
He splashed cold water on his face and then used the towel beside the sink to dry off. It smelled like peppermint. Like her.
Running his hand through his already messy hair, Thad groaned. Well, he’d just have to go out there and make it clear to her about how things were going to go between them. If she wasn’t okay with that, he’d best say goodbye tonight before things got any worse.
Or...any better.
Turning off the light, Thad exited the bathroom and made his way to the bed, where Jolie was sitting up, the covers pulled up under her chin, looking like sweet temptation all over again. His gaze flicked to the remaining condoms on the bedside table and his cock twitched in reflexive excitement.
Down, boy.
“Hey,” Jolie said softly, gnawing shyly on her lip.
Oh, dear God. That woman had to stop drawing his attention to her sweet, sweet mouth. He eyed the clothes strewn all over the floor, with half a mind to get dressed and bolt. But instead he flipped the sheets back and crawled into bed beside her, having no desire to be anywhere else.
The second he was under the covers, she slid close, putting her head on his chest and draping a long, lovely leg over his.
Thad inhaled deeply, bolstering himself for the conversation they needed to have.
“Tell me about your family,” he said.
What? Where the hell had that come from?
She was so quiet he didn’t think she was going to answer, and he stroked the back of her head to comfort her.
“There’s not much to tell, really.”
“What happened to them?”
Her hand stopped playing with the hair on his chest as she raised her head to frown at him. “What do you mean?”
“How did they die?”
“Die?” She made a sound at the back of her throat. “They didn’t die.”
He blinked. “Then what the hell are you doing here?”
Tilting her head to one side, she said, “I’m on assignment.”
“Over Christmas?”
“Yes.”
“And you’d rather spend Christmas with strangers than with family?”
She frowned, blinked and then settled her head on his chest once more. “Yes.” She sounded defensive.
“Don’t get along?” he asked softly, rolling his eyes at himself. What on earth was possessing him to keep asking these personal questions? What he should be doing was clearing the air between them, not getting to know her better.
Her delicate fingers started up on his chest again, gliding over skin and twirling in amongst the hair.
“We get along fine. I’m just sort of...the black sheep of the family.”
Thad laughed, a single sharp bark. “You? A black sheep? C’mon.”
“Don’t laugh.” She pinched his nipple, which only made him laugh more. “It’s true.”
“What have you done to become the black sheep in your family?”
“It’s not what I’ve done.” Her chest rose and fell heavily against him. “More like what I haven’t done.”
“So, what haven’t you done?”
“Made something of myself. Done something meaningful with my life...found purpose.”
Fitting his knuckle beneath her chin, he raised her face to his. “What on God’s green earth are you talking about? You are someone special.”
Her smile was wistful. “N
o. I’m not.”
“What? Is your family made up of a bunch of superheroes or something?”
“Pretty much.” She nestled back on his chest, her head fitting perfectly in the hollow of his shoulder beneath his chin. “My mom’s head of ER at Northwestern Memorial. She saves lives every day. My dad’s a neurosurgeon at Rush Medical. He saves lives every day. My brother’s a district attorney for Cook County. He’s dedicated his life to protecting the good people from the rapists and murderers and hardened criminals in this world.” She paused. “Then there’s me. What do I do? I write travel articles. Fluff. Stuff that is unnecessary and lacks meaning.”
“Is that what they say?”
She was quiet again. “No. But it’s clear in what they don’t say.”
“Because you’re not saving lives?” Good Lord, what would her family make of him? Thad dared not think about it. “Not everyone can be a doctor or a lawyer. Think how boring that would make the world.”
She laughed softly and the movement of her body felt good against his.
“You are anything but boring.” He stroked the soft skin of her back. “I’m sure they see that.”
“It’s not about being boring or not. It’s about having purpose. You know how I told you I didn’t go to church?”
“Yeah?”
“Well, it’s more than that. My family’s staunchly secular humanist.”
“So?”
“So, when you believe you are here on earth purely as a biological statistic—tantamount to winning the lottery at a-trillion-to-one odds—and that this is the one and only life you’ll ever lead, then you damn well better make the most of it. Because luck combined with life should not be wasted.”
“Hmm. An interesting supposition.”
“It’s my family credo.”
“So, you’re not living up to your potential?” Thad chuckled sardonically. If only he could tell her what a disappointment he was. No—calling himself that was mild compared to what he truly was. Thad was the definition of a black sheep, the real deal.
“I’m supposed to be a reporter, breaking big stories...not some travel writer...” Her words trailed off. “I don’t know why I’m telling you all this.”
“It’s okay. I like knowing where you come from.” Thad realized his mistake too late.
“What about you?”
“Not much to tell, really.” Shit. Of course she’d turn it around and want to know. Well, if there was one thing Thad was good at, it was making up stories. The trick was to start with truth, then embellish and add enough stuff so that it was as plausible as real life, but not too implausible.
“Well, you’re a long way from home, cowboy.” She’d put on a Southern drawl as she propped her chin on her hands to gaze up at him.
“I suppose.”
“When did you leave?” she asked.
“Like everyone else. Right after Katrina.”
“What about your family?”
“My parents died in a boating incident when I was little. Was raised by my grandmere.” He hadn’t thought of her in such a long time because he never let himself. When she did happen to cross his mind, it was always in terms of someone else’s grandmother, from a distance, because the last time he’d seen her, he disappointed her in ways that would haunt him forever.
He could imagine the shock on Jolie’s face when he tried to explain. The disbelief, followed by horror. Then disgust.
“Is she still alive? Your grandmother?”
“Naw. Casualty of Katrina.”
“Oh, Thad. I’m so sorry.” She rubbed a circle over his heart.
“I shoulda stayed with her, or convinced her to leave.” This was both the truth and a lie. He could have stayed. Then he’d have died with her and that would have been the end of it. But instead he ran, and he did it without any thought of taking her with him, not that she would have gone.
“No one knew how bad it was going to be,” she said softly.
“People knew.” Fuck. He knew. And he’d been thankful for the pending disaster. Not because of how bad it would be or that it would kill his grandmother but because he’d hoped it would get the Feds off his tail.
And it had. He was one of the presumed dead. Thank God. And he had to keep it that way.
“I’m sorry.”
He heaved a sigh because he had just told Jolie Duval more than he’d told anyone about himself since he’d left. “Naw, I’m sorry.”
“It must be hard at this time of year. With no family.” Now she was rubbing the scar on his shoulder and all the memories that Thad had buried bubbled up to the surface.
His grandmere, telling him to stay away from the Salvatori family and especially Raina. Beautiful, spoiled Raina. How he hadn’t listened and had proposed to her on Christmas Eve—God, that was twelve years ago now. How he’d thought the family had accepted him when she’d said yes.
Except they hadn’t. Not until he proved himself.
Oh, God.
The things they’d wanted him to do. What he’d done...
“You okay?”
“Sorry. I just don’t like talking about it much. You understand?”
“Sure.” She was still again, the kind of stillness that meant her brain was working extrahard, which meant more questions were pending.
He should just get up and leave, right now. But that would only make someone like Jolie think about his situation even harder, and he couldn’t have that. There was only one way Thad knew to get someone’s brain to shut off, to make them forget.
He scooched down beneath the covers, rolled the two of them over so he was on top of her again and kissed her. She wasn’t the only one who needed to forget. Thad needed to as well, because he had no time to be haunted by the ghosts of Christmas past.
It was too dangerous.
11
I’ve never really understood the saying Home Is Where the Heart Is...until today.
Jo Duval
JOLIE AWOKE TO the sound of squeals, which brought an automatic smile to her face. Then other memories surfaced—vigorous, satisfying memories—and her smile grew. She reached for Thad, even though she knew he was gone. Maybe she was hoping for some lingering warmth. She wrapped her arms around the pillow he’d used and sniffed.
Mmm. Smoke and cedar and soap and Thad.
While he’d tried to quietly dress when he left in the wee hours of the morning, she’d heard him anyway. Just as he’d opened the French doors, but before he could step outside, she’d called, “Merry Christmas.”
With his back still to her, he waited and then slowly turned. She hadn’t been able to make out his features in the darkness. “Merry Christmas to you, too, Jolie Duval.”
“I’ll see you later?”
“Of course.” The door slid softly behind him and Jolie had lain awake, replaying all the wonderful moments over and over again until she fell asleep. Her dreams were all jumbled images of Thad and gifts and lights and mistletoe.
The sound of small feet running on the hardwood floors outside her room, accompanied by the squeals of delight, brought her to a sitting position. As much as she was disappointed that Thad was gone, she shared a certain excitement with Zak.
“He came! Santa came!”
Yes, he had.
Three times.
Jolie smothered a laugh. Diving for the bedside table, she placed the last remaining condom in the drawer before getting out of bed.
A quick shower l
ater and she was dressed and making her way down the hall to the great room. Everyone was up already except for Kaylee and Evan. The fresh smell of coffee and baking filled the air along with the excited sounds of Zak, who had already torn open his Christmas stocking and was playing with the elastic-propelled airplane he’d found inside.
“Stockings first, then we eat, and afterward we’ll open presents.”
“Awww,” Zak complained as he chased the plane to where it dropped after careening off a ceiling beam.
“No complaints, Zak,” Simon admonished. “Those are the same rules as at our house.”
The boy’s shoulders slumped as he gazed longingly at the pile of gifts beneath the tree. Jolie had never seen so many gifts and she realized she’d left hers back in her room. She hurried back to retrieve them and then returned, phone in hand to take pictures. The huge tree with brightly wrapped parcels, all sitting in front of a picture window with snow-capped mountains in the background... It was so perfect it couldn’t be real. And if she hadn’t been here to experience it firsthand, she’d have thought the whole thing was faked for a Hallmark card.
She placed the small packages under the tree with the rest and took another bunch of pictures. The stockings were her favorite part, real wool socks all tacked to the mantel of the huge fireplace, filled to overflowing with gifts.
When she saw the stocking with her name stitched across the front, Jo thought she might burst with excitement. Her very first Christmas stocking.
“May I?” She turned to Gloria, holding the stocking as if it was the most precious thing in the world.
“Santa left it for you, didn’t he?” Gloria grinned and Jolie took the stocking to the same couch she’d shared with Thad last night and opened it, slowly pulling out item by item: a huge candy cane, a bottle of lotion, a small box of chocolates, a scented candle, bubble bath.
Clad in Super Woman pajamas and her hair uncombed, Kaylee plopped down on the couch beside Jo. “Are you okay?” she asked.
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