“A dinosaur dresses better than him!” Halfway joked.
The laughter grew louder.
Nails wiped tears of laughter from her eyes. “Oh you guys!”
“General, Standwall told me. you punched General Johnson in his eye.
What happened?” a commander asked.
“That fat creep sucker punched me. I was paying him back. I could have court-martialled him, but I preferred to get my revenge the old fashioned way.
I need to give Admiral Chun a sock in the eye too. He went behind my back and told the Secretary of Defense-who I don’t give damn about-about my bombing plans.”
“I was kicking that China man’s ass until I was interrupted,” Standwall said.
“The China man was kicking your ass, too,” Halfway quipped. Everybody laughed again.
Standwall wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes. “He certainly did with that karate.”
Nails asked Halfway, “You mean, you and your commanders had a brawl?”
“Yes, we did. You should have seen the President when he opened the briefing-room door and saw us. He looked like he crapped his pants.”
Everybody laughed louder.
“You know the hippy started it, General,” Standwall said.
“Yeah, he gave me a right cross.”
“Oh, you guys are something else,” Nails exclaimed.
“General, it’s your deal,” Standwall said.
Mark and Larry strode outside the tent. “Halfway killed a baby dinosaur,”
Mark said. “He shot it out of my hand with his pistols. Then he shot two dinosaur eggs. He’s a sadistic creep.”
“He and Standwall should be brothers,” Larry said. “Standwall’s troops found some dinosaur eggs. He ordered his cook to fry them for breakfast.”
“You’re right, the two act almost the same,” Mark said bitterly. “If they were the same color they could be twins.”
“You know that Standwall smokes like a chimney,” Larry said. “Everytime I turn around, the bloody chap has a cigar in his mouth.”
“I hope he dies from cancer. If he ever calls me a hippy again, I’ll shoot him. I hate the red-neck worse than Halfway.”
“Why, sir?”
“Because Standwall hates everyone who’s different from him, except for Halfway.”
“You know, sir, I miss the dinosaur zoo.”
“Well, Larry, I do, too. One is being built in Japan. I’m thinking about applying for the director position. If I get it, you can be my game warden again.”
“Thanks chap, but do you think this can happen over in Japan?”
“I’m not God, Larry, I can’t answer that question.”
Chapter 11
Around the world the news stations reported the dinosaur war. An anchorman on national TV: “This is day two of the war between the
dinosaurs. L.A. and its suburbs are constantly being bombed. Our
sources tell us the bombing will stop before midnight. Already two
thirds of the city and suburbs have been destroyed. The city looks
like war-torn Europe during War World II.
“Huge fires have broken out, large buildings have crumbled, and massive areas are totally demolished. The estimated cost of this war is over trillion of dollars. Is this the price we have to pay to get rid of a few dinosaurs? Here’s a comment from Senate Majority Leader Stewart on the steps of the White House.”
“I think the price is high, Stewart said, “but it’s necessary to get rid of these creatures before they destroy mankind. General Halfway
is doing a terrific job commanding this war.”
The reporter continued, “Here is a comment from from California Congressman Trown.”
On the White House steps, Trown said, “This isn’t right! The entire city is being bombed by idiots to get rid of a few dinosaurs. After the war, the people who live in L.A. will go back to nothing, and how long will it take the government to rebuild their city? I think this bombing is a conspiracy, and I think General Halfway is involved in it.”
The reporter continued, “Here’s a reaction from Senator Stewart about Trown’s comments.”
“Congressman Trown has never served in the military, and who’s he calling idiots? The armed forces aren’t bombing to get rid of a few
dinosaurs. They’re bombing to get rid of many. Remember, a day ago
two hundred of these creatures killed over two thousand soldiers.
There’s no conspiracy and Halfway is full of integrity.”
The reporter continued, “We have taken a poll about the bombing, sixty-five percent of Americans approve of it, and twenty percent
disapprove and ten percent are undecided.”
It was 11:10 PM. Halfway and his crew were asleep in their sleeping bags in his tent. Outside it was pouring with rain. Standwall ducked
into the tent with a phone and shouted, “General Halfway! Wake the
hell up! Get up General!”
Halfway and his crew woke, blinking with alarm. “What the hell do you want, Standwall?” Halfway shouted angrily. “You think you’re a
damn, drill sergeant?”
“I’m sorry, sir, but it’s General Clover with good news.”
Halfway got up, sleepy eyed, sneezed and let out a loud fart. The smell made everybody in the tent pinch their nostrils and frowned except for Standwall, who smirked.
“Nasty bastard!” Mark yelled.
“Excuse me!” Halfway said. “I still got gas from that dinosaur meat.”
He grabbed the phone. “What is it, Clover?”
“The bombing stopped at 2300 hours. All buildings are demolished.
I don’t know if all the dinosaurs are destroyed. A few may have survived.
The rains have put out the majority of the fires that were created by the bombing. I suggest that when your troops go in tomorrow to search and destroy they wear gas masks because of the fumes.”
“Tell your bombers they did a good job, and tell the Admiral’s bombers too.” With a wide grin on his face, Halfway clicked off the phone,
opened a bottle of Scotch and yelled joyfully, “Standwall, bring more whiskey! We’re going to celebrate! This damn war should be over soon!”
Everybody grinned except Mark. Halfway shouted, “Mark, get out of
that sleeping bag and celebrate with us!”
Somberly, Mark said, “Sorry General, I don’t feel like celebrating
the deaths of others.”
The next morning, Halfway woke with a hangover. “Oh, my head.”
Mark heard him. “General, looks like you have a hangover. You and
that red-neck Standwall, and some of your troops too, have been drinking, shouting, shooting your weapons mostly all night.”
“Where’s my aide?”
“He went to the mess tent to get us some breakfast. I made coffee.
Would you like some, General?”
“Certainly, maybe it will help my hangover.”
A few hours later the rain stopped. Halfway inspected Standwall’s troops and said, “Colonel, they look ready for combat.” He pulled
him aside and whispered, “After the search and destroy operation,
try to get time alone with Captain Nails. I think she likes you. She’s a good woman and commander and she’s good at cards.”
Standwall smiled. “She certainly is. And she’s pretty.”
“My friend, I’m leaving now. I’m going back to headquarters. I have a press conference and have to call the President and give him the results of the bombing. Good luck with the operation, Colonel.”
“Thank you, sir.”
Halfway and his crew got into his jeep. Nails walked up to Standwall and said, “The general forgot to inspect my troops.”
“He didn’t forget. He didn’t have the time. What a terrific general!”
Standwall stood proudly, waving to Halfway’s retreating jeep.
As the jeep drove, Halfway asked Mark, “Are you married?”
“Yes, General, I’ve been married for twenty years. My daughter just graduated from high school. That reminds me, I’ve got to call my wife when we get back. I heard you shouting at your wife on the phone.
How long have you been married?”
“Twenty-five years. Betty’s a good wife. She can be pushy sometimes, and I have to put my foot down to let her know who’s the boss. I have three sons. They’re officers in the Army. I’m proud of them.”
“General, being black, was it difficult moving up in the ranks?”
“You’re sounding like a reporter. Well, it was, but I can smell a bigot a mile away, warning signs flash in my head and I know how to deal
with him.”
“Well, I know you don’t have trouble smelling Standwall.”
“Mark, are you trying to be funny?” Halfway frowned.
“No, General.” Mark smirked.
The President was sitting at his desk when Senator Stewart entered his office. “How are you today, Mr. President?” Stewart asked.
The President grimaced, “Have a seat, Senator. I just got finished talking to Halfway. He told me about the deal you made with him about giving him millions of dollars and supporting him for President in
the next election because he demolished Los Angeles.”
“That two-faced bastard! I’ll destroy his career! You don’t have proof I made a deal with him!”
“Oh yes, I do, Senator. Halfway always records his phone calls, and he probably had your office bugged.”
“That nigger will never be President! He’s out of millions of dollars!”
“I think not, Senator. He told me you’re a racist, but I didn’t believe him. Now I do. He’s started a construction company that was financing by me and several of my friends. That company will rebuild L.A., not yours.
He still has a chance for President in the future. He’ll be running as my Vice President in the reelection.”
“I suspected you and he were con artists. I’ll never support that ticket! And you can’t stop my company from bidding to rebuild L.A.”
“Yes, I can, Senator. Don’t forget, I’m the President and I’ll turn over the tape of your phone call with Halfway to the press. When congress and the people hear it, you can kiss your career good-bye. And they
may bring charges against you.” He played the tape and smiled.
Angered, Stewart yelled, “That’s blackmail!”
“Now, should I release the tape?”
Fear washed over Stewart’s face. “No! Please don’t do it, Mr.
President. I’ll support you and Halfway.”
“And your company will not build anything in Los Angeles. Do I make myself clear, Senator?”
“Yes, Mr. President.”
Stewart crestfallen as he left the President’s office, mumbling incoherently like he was having a nervous breakdown.
Later that day, Stewart was in his bedroom at his mansion, crying to himself, “I can’t believed that nigger did this to me. He’s ruining me and my company. That back-stabber. I’ll kill the nigger!” He reached in his drawer and pulled out a pistol. Then made a phone call to his
private pilot. “Have the plane ready, we’re leaving for California.”
Army reconnaissance patrols were sent out by Johnson, were combing the burnt out areas in the suburbs. The leader of one of the
patrols was Sergeant Jones. His point man came from ahead, saying, “Sarge, there’s a wounded dinosaur ahead.”
“How far and what does it look like?”
“A quarter of a mile, north. It’s a plant-eater. I think a Triceratops.
It seems to be very friendly.”
“I’ll call artillery to give them the coordinates.”
“No, Sarge, please don’t have it blasted to death. Come and see the thing for yourself before you call for the coordinates.”
Jones agreed and waved his seven-man squad on. They walked through burnt bushes and approached the wounded dinosaur, who used to be
Mark’s pet. The creature lay on the ground, conscious, tears dripping from down its suffering eyes. The medic petted it. “Sarge,” he said, “this animal wasn’t wounded by the bombing. It has chunks of flesh bitten out of it. It was attacked by predators.”
“The poor animal needs to be put out of its misery,” Jones said. “I’ll order one of my men to do it.”
A soldier took his powerful anti-tank gun and shot the animal in the head, which exploded and its brain spattering. The air smelled like
burnt meat, as part of the animal’s brain sizzled.
“Let’s get the hell out of here!” Jones yelled. “The predators that attacked that animal may still be around! I’ll call in to give the
coordinates to have this entire area bombed! Let’s move it!”
As Jones and his men ran from the area, heavy artillery bombing hit it. One of the men was wounded and another shouted, “Frank was hit!
I’m going back to get him!”
“No! Leave him!” Jones shouted. “You’ll be killed!”
“I can’t leave my friend!” The soldier ran to him, threw him on his shoulder and retreated as he heard the bombs exploding inches away.
Tearing out of the burning bushes, two ceratosaurs blocked their
way and roared. The soldier dropped the wounded man and quickly fired his automatic rifle, but it don’t faze them. They tore his flesh apart and ate him, then headed for the wounded man. But before they could
reach him, they, and he, were blasted to death by artillery fire.
Halfway was at his headquarters and ready to give his press conference.
He and Mark were walking toward the auditorium where the press waited.
As they walked, Mark asked, “General, what do you need me for? You
can handle this press conference alone. The war is almost over.”
“You’re right, the war is almost over, but I still need your assistance.”
They went into the auditorium and onto the stage. Out of the crowd of reporters one shouted, “Is the war over, General?”
Standing by a microphone, Halfway glared, looked at his notes, and
said, “No, the war is not over yet. Many brave soldiers have died in this war and many were injured. The operation has changed from DD Day
to Search and Destroy. I have doubled the number of troops for this
operation. The mission is to kill any dinosaurs that may have survived the bombing. My troops will not take prisoners. I’ll take your questions now.”
Q: General, was it necessary to bomb the entire city?
A: Yes. Some dinosaurs were using buildings for hideouts, and when
my troops entered, they were ambushed. The buildings were like traps.
Plus the bombing was necessary to get rid of the large dinosaurs who
had killed the majority of my troops.
Q: General, don’t you think it would have been more cost-effective
and would have saved the city if hunters were used to kill the dinosaurs instead of bombing them?
A: No, some dinosaurs are better hunters than human beings. They would have probably killed the hunters and the military would have ended
up going in anyway. There was no way around the bombing.
Q: This is for Mark. Have you heard that the Japanese have secured
some dinosaurs and are planning to build a dinosaur zoo in the future?
Have they made you an offer to be the director of it?
A: No.
Q: If they do make you an offer, will you accept it?
A: I have no comment.
Q: General! Can you give us an estimate of how many dinosaurs are
left?
A: I would say a few.
Q: Will this war be over today?
A: I hope so. Next.
Q: General, since you’ll be considered a war hero after this war and
your popularity has now grown because of it, will you run for President?
Halfway grinned. “No comment. Sorry, this press conference is over.
I have a war to finish.”
Later, on a dirt road heading toward Johnson’s field headquarters, a Troodon ran out in front of Halfway’s jeep and roared. Ben, the driver, panicked and shouted, “Look out!” He swerved the jeep to prevent
hitting the dinosaur and crashed into a tree. His passengers were
thrown from the jeep, and he was knocked unconscious. The jeep
exploded, killing him.
The passengers lay just a few feet away from the explosion. Halfway, the only one unconscious, was awakened by a foul smell. He opened
his eyes and found the Troodon’s face inches away from his own. He
smelled its revolting breath as it opened its mouth and saliva dripped.
Terrified, he screamed, “No! Noooooooooo!”
The creature vomited on him, and as it was about to eat him, Mark shot it in the head. “General, are you all right?” Mark shouted.
“Yes!”
Mark came quickly to Halfway’s side. “General, can you walk?”
“I think my ankle is sprained, but I can manage. Thanks for saving my life. I’ll always owe you for that. You’re a good soldier.”
“General, I’m not one of your soldiers.”
“In my book you are. Are Ben and the cameraman okay?”
“The cameraman’s leg is broken, Ben was killed when our jeep exploded.”
“Ben was an excellent soldier and a good friend,” Halfway said sadly.
“I will miss him.”
“If I didn’t have this army helmet on, I probably would have died from the impact,” Mark said. “You know, General, you saved my life by making me wear this thing.”
“Well, that makes us even. That damn dinosaur vomited on my uniform.
I smell like a dead man.”
“Yeah, you do, General. Does Johnson’s army move out soon?”
“Yes, but I told him don’t move without me.”
“How far is his headquarters from here?”
“About two miles.”
“I’ll go get some help, General. Since your ankle is twisted, you stay here with the cameraman.”
“What do you think: you’re a General now, giving me orders? You had medical training. You stay here with him. I’ll get help. I’ve been in three wars and been injured ten times worse than this and traveled on a more
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