by E. L. Todd
“So?” I asked. “I love Trinity and we do everything you can possibly think of.”
“But Skye and I are different,” he said. “I’m more than happy with our sex life. I don’t like fucking. I prefer making love.”
“Every time?” I asked incredulously. “There aren’t nights when you just want to rip into her?”
“No.” He turned to the dealer. “Hit me.”
The dealer flipped the cards and Cayson got twenty-one. “Congratulations.” He pushed the chips toward him.
Cayson threw more chips into the pile for another round. “No, not really.”
“You don’t find her that attractive or what…?”
“Shut the hell up, Slade,” he said. “You know that isn’t the case. I just respect her. It’s different with her than the others. And I want her to know that.”
“I respect Trinity but we don’t always have emotional, sappy sex. We get into it and fuck hard.”
“Well, good for you.”
Cayson was missing an important point. “I’m going to give you some advice and you better listen.”
“I’m not getting a tattoo.”
“That wasn’t what I was going to say…but you really should.”
Cayson turned his gaze back to the game.
“The woman you want for the rest of your life will always compare herself to all the others, whether she knows who they are or not. And while they want the sex to be different from what you had with them, they also want to replace them. You get what I’m saying?”
“Not really.” He watched the cards.
“Trinity wants me to live out all my fantasies through her. It makes her feel sexy. She likes knowing that there’s nothing I can get from other women that I can’t get with her. It’s like a sense of security. And of course, I make love to her—just not every single time. It goes the other way too. I always try to make her come. If I don’t, I’m afraid she’ll look for release somewhere else. It’s the same thing.”
Cayson lost the hand then looked at me. “That makes more sense now.”
“So, do dirty things with her,” I said. “It’ll make her feel good.”
He nodded. “Maybe you understand relationships better than I gave you credit for.”
“Shit, I’m the relationship whisperer.”
“I thought that was me.”
“Well, I’m carrying the torch now.”
Cayson chuckled. “I can’t believe you’re getting married before me—before everyone. I never thought that would happen—not in a million years.”
“Yeah…” It was still crazy to think about. “But I never thought I would love someone the way I love Trinity.”
He patted my shoulder. “You’re becoming a man.”
“I became a man a long time ago, bro.”
“A different kind of man. And you know it.”
***
“I’m so tired.” Trinity leaned against the window of the plane with her eyes closed. She looked dead. Lack of sleep and too much alcohol was distorting her features. She looked haggard and weak.
“But did you have fun?”
“So much fun,” she said. “I’ll never forget it.”
“I told you I knew how to party.”
“And get arrested,” she jabbed.
I sighed. “No one will ever let that go, will they?”
“Nope.”
I grabbed the blanket from under my seat then positioned Trinity to lie on me. Her head moved to my lap and she turned her face toward my stomach. I pulled the blanket over her and stuffed the blanket around her like I was tucking her in for bed. “Sweet dreams, princess.”
Her lips stretched into a smile. “Princess?”
“You’re my princess.” My hand moved through her hair.
“And you make me feel like one.” Her left hand was pulled against her chest and I could see the brilliant ring I got her. It matched her so well, syncing with her personality and shining with the love I had for her.
“Can you believe we’re getting married in two weeks?”
“No…I wish it wasn’t so far away.”
“Me neither.”
She tilted her head and looked at me. “We have to promise each other that no matter what happens we’ll never get divorced.”
My hand fisted her hair. “You actually think I’d let you leave me?” I chuckled. “Baby, you’re stuck with me. And I mean in a psycho territorial way. I will make your life as difficult as possible if you ever try to walk away from me.”
She smiled. “Good.”
“And I’d never leave you so we don’t have to worry about that.”
She released a happy sigh and closed her eyes. “I know.”
***
When we returned to the apartment, I carried our luggage into the bedroom and set it in the corner. I wasn’t in the mood to unpack. I never unpacked anyway. I just used everything in my suitcase until it was empty. It drove Trinity crazy.
Trinity lay on the bed. “I’m so glad to be home. I’m going to bed at a reasonable hour every night and no alcohol.” She shook her head dramatically. “Yuck.”
“So, you’re becoming an old woman?”
“And I’m proud of it.” She stretched on the bed.
See her lay on the comforter with her hair sprawled out got me in the mood. Pretty much any time she was on her back I was in the mood. She was a fantasy I got to live out over and over. I unbuttoned my jeans and got ready to take her in a seductive way.
When Trinity realized what I was doing, she sat up and grabbed my wrist, stopping me.
“What?”
“Uh…we need to talk.”
I hated those words. They were like acid poured in my ear. “What did I do now?”
“Nothing.”
“Then why are you being all ominous?”
“Because I know what I’m about to say will piss you off.”
I sat beside her. “I’m not liking this, baby…”
“Since we’re getting married in two weeks…”
“Yeah?”
“I don’t think we should have sex until the wedding night.”
Was that a fucking joke? “You aren’t being serious, right? This is one of your jokes I don’t understand.”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry, Slade.”
“Two fucking weeks? Are you insane?”
“I want our wedding night to be special.”
“Well, it won’t be special when I only last for twenty seconds because my tolerance is low,” I snapped.
“I just think it would be good for both of us.”
I wanted to slap my lady. “I’m not agreeing to this.”
“It’s not really an agreement.”
“Trinity, we already live together and we fucked a million times before marriage. Just because we refrain from sex for a few weeks doesn’t make you a pure bride at the wedding.”
“That isn’t why,” she snapped. “I just want us to really want each other on the wedding night.”
“Believe me, I’ll want you.” How could she ever doubt that?
“Slade, this is what I want. Just be supportive.”
“Be supportive?” I asked. “It’s not like you told me you’re dyeing your hair black and you want me to be supportive. This directly affects me and my sailor down below.”
“It’ll be fine. It’s just two weeks.”
“I haven’t gone two weeks without sex since before I hit puberty. You’re asking a lot here, Trin.”
“Well, that’s how it’s going to be.”
“Can we at least compromise?” I asked. “How about we don’t have sex the day before the wedding?”
“Twenty four hours?” she asked incredulously. “No.”
“Then a week.” A week was still too long but it was better than two.
“No, Slade.”
“Never hit a woman…”
“What?” she asked.
“Nothing,” I said quickly. “I’ll just get you in
bed anyway. I’m unusually good at it.”
“No, you won’t, Slade. You will support this.”
“You can’t make me do anything.”
“Yes, I can.” She gave me a firm look. “This is important to me. Just do it.”
I sighed, hating the fact Trinity got whatever she wanted just because it was her wedding day. “You’re asking for a lot…”
“I know.” She caressed my arm. “But we have the rest of our lives.”
“Does this mean I can’t jerk off?”
“No. Sorry.”
I was already in pain thinking about it. “I hate you.”
“I know…but it’s only for a little while.”
“Maybe to you…”
She kissed my neck. “We can do it, Slade.”
The next two weeks would be a miserable experience. “Fine. But this doesn’t start until tomorrow.”
It looked like Trinity was going to argue with me. Her lips opened but she didn’t speak. Then she breathed a sigh. “Fine. Just tonight.”
“Then I’m going to fuck you as many times as I can.” I pushed her on the bed aggressively then moved on top of her. “You’re going to be so sore that you’ll need a two week break.”
CHAPTER TEN
Clementine
Ward crossed his arms over his chest while he inspected one of the spare bedrooms. He paced across the floor and tapped his fingers against his lips, lost in thought.
“You like it?”
“The room is fine,” he said. “That’s not what I’m thinking about.”
I watched him walk around as I leaned against the doorframe. I wore a loose dress because anything remotely tight was uncomfortable on my stomach. One hand rested there, like usual. “Then what are you thinking about?”
“I just think having my own room might be pointless.” He stopped pacing and turned to me. He wore his suit because he just got off work, and his shoulders looked broad and powerful. I had to restrain myself from jumping his bones. There were other things to do and serious conversations to have.
“Why?”
He rubbed his chin while looking at me. “Judging the way things are going, I’ll be sleeping with you every night.”
Probably.
“I don’t want to take up a room that will never be used.”
“But you should have your own space. I want you to feel comfortable.”
“How about this?” he asked as he stepped closer to me. “This room will be my office. And I’ll put the rest of my things in storage—just in case I need it later.”
“That works,” I said. “But you can bring whatever you want.”
“The house is already furnished,” he said. “If I brought more things it would just be cluttered. And we shouldn’t have things in the way when a little kid is running around.”
“That’s true.”
“So, how about we do that?” he asked. “We still got three extra bedrooms for future kids and I have a man cave.”
“I’m okay with that.”
“Great.” He came closer to me then looked down in my face. “So, we’ll share a bedroom together?”
“I suspect I’ll always want you around.”
“Or until these hormones wear off.” He searched my face with a sad look in his eyes.
“No,” I said. “I’ll always want you around.”
He stepped closer to me, his lips close to mine. He glanced at my mouth, telling me exactly what he wanted.
I stayed rooted to the spot, not moving forward. I hadn’t kissed him yet and I still couldn’t do it. I wasn’t sure why. Something was holding me back. I guess because I knew there was no going back once I did.
Ward stepped away when he realized I wouldn’t give him what he wanted. His shoulders weren’t as broad as they were a moment ago. And he seemed shorter somehow. “I’ll get the move going.” He walked past me and into the hallway.
I followed him as he headed to the front door. His hands were in his pockets and his long legs moved slowly as he walked. He got the door opened and gave me a quick nod. “I’ll see you later.”
“Ward?”
He walked out and turned around.
“Do you have to go right this second?”
His eyes darkened. “Actually, I do.” He walked away without waiting for me to speak.
I knew he was hurt. His patience for me was waning. He wanted us to be together, and he was worried it would never happen. Something was keeping me back and I knew I should let it go. Ward was the man I loved, and he would always be the man I loved. We were stuck together anyway. So shouldn’t we try?
***
“You’re moving in together?” Skye asked at the office. “This is huge!”
“Yeah,” I said. “It’s a big step.”
“So, you’re finally back together.”
“Well, no…”
Her eyes narrowed on my face. “Then what the hell is going on?”
“I want him to keep his house in London. Financially, it makes more sense for him to live with me. And it’ll be nice to have him around for the baby.”
“But if you don’t want him how is that fair to him?” Skye turned hostile.
“I do want him…”
“Then why aren’t you together?”
“It’s complicated…”
She leaned over my desk and lowered her voice. “Ward is my friend and I’m not going to let you hurt him. Get your shit together or I will smack you around when that baby is out of your belly. I’m not joking, Clementine.” She gave me a threatening look before she walked away.
My future sister-in-law just threatened me and it didn’t feel good.
Sean came to my desk. “You doing okay, Clemy?”
“Huh?” I didn’t even notice his approach. “Oh yeah, I’m fine.”
“No baby trouble?” he asked as he held a folder.
“Everything is going well.”
“Let me know if you need anything.”
“I should be waiting on you,” I reminded him.
He chuckled. “Pregnant women always take priority.” He walked into his office and shut the door.
Then Ward came to my desk. “Hey, darling. Lunch?”
“Uh…sure.” I grabbed my purse while in a daze.
Ward caught the look. “Everything alright?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I shouldered my purse then walked with him.
Ward headed to Skye’s office.
“What are you doing?”
“Asking Skye if she wants to tag along.” He eyed me suspiciously. “Is that okay?”
“Uh…how about it just be us?”
Ward knew something was off. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I said. “Let’s go.” I didn’t want Skye to step out of her office and see us. After seeing the threatening look in her eyes I didn’t want to tango with her again.
“I can talk to her for you,” he said. “We’re good friends.”
“No, let’s just leave.”
Since the universe hated me, Skye stepped out of her office then halted when she saw us. She gave me a look of death then looked at Ward. “Excuse me.” She tried to walk around us.
“Want to get lunch with us?” Ward asked.
She gave me another glare. “I’m not hungry.” Then she walked away.
Ward grabbed her arm gently. “Let’s get lunch so we can talk about this—not at the office.”
“There’s nothing to talk about,” Skye said coldly.
Ward stared her down. “ For me—please.”
She sighed and looked away. “Fine.”
***
We sat together at the restaurant, Cayson and Skye across from us.
Cayson knew something was off judging the concerned look on his face. He kept glancing at Skye, noting her obvious frown.
I crossed my arms over my chest because I felt uncomfortable. I already ate all my food so there was nothing for me to do with my hands.
“Okay,” Ward
said. “There’s obviously some sort of rift going on here…let’s work it out like adults.”
Skye wouldn’t look at me.
Cayson looked confused like he didn’t know what was going on.
“Skye,” Ward said. “You go first.”
She turned her gaze toward him. “You’re either together or you aren’t. First, Clementine says you’re sleeping together like it’s a hook up and now you’re moving in together. But you aren’t together?” Disdain was in her voice. “I don’t care if Clementine is family. I’m not going to let her drag you through the mud and treat you like a dog. You’ve been nothing but good to her. It pisses me off.”
Ward nodded but didn’t respond. “Clementine, your turn.”
I moved my arms to my sides. “He and I are working out our relationship.”
“By using him?” she snapped. “You let him buy you a house then you use him to get off? Now he’s moving in with you when you still can’t offer him anything?”
“We’ll get there,” I said. “I just need more time.”
“More time for what?” Skye asked incredulously. “You’re being a fucking brat.”
The table fell silent at her insult.
“Skye.” Cayson put his hand on hers. “This is their relationship. Just stay out of it. Remember when we were broken up? We were together but we weren’t? It’s the same thing. Let them work it out on their own.”
At least my brother defended me. “Trust is hard for me. And he violated that trust.”
Skye rolled her eyes. “Get over it.”
I felt the anger bubble under the service. “I was with a man for over a year and we were in love. I was happy. Then I found out he was married with two kids. I found out because I found his wedding band in his bag. Then he tried to leave them for me. I’ve never forgiven myself for being the other woman, even if I didn’t know it at the time. So keep your nose out of our business.”
Skye stared at me in surprise.
Cayson was equally speechless.
Ward cleared his throat. “I understand why Clemy is the way she is and I’ll be as patient as she needs. We are moving forward even if it doesn’t seem that way. We appreciate your concern, Skye, but it’s unnecessary.”
Skye was finally subdued. “I’m sorry…”
“It’s okay,” I whispered.