Lisa slowed but didn’t stop before turning onto my street, and I said a silent prayer of thanks when my house came into view. The road in front of it was mostly clear since a lot of the dead were now on other streets, and the few still around were several houses away. It would make getting the garage door open and the car inside a hell of a lot less stressful.
While I was thrilled we weren’t about to face a huge horde of the undead, the nearly deserted street caused panic to well up inside me. Where was my mom? I could barely stomach the idea of seeing her, but at the same time, I couldn’t stand thinking she’d wandered off for good. I would need to take care of her at some point, because there was no way I could let her walk around like that forever. What if she was still in there, trapped but unable to stop the creature that had taken over her body from doing horrible things? No one deserved to live that way, least of all my sweet, caring, and sensitive mother.
I craned my neck as Lisa drove toward my house, scanning the dead we passed in hopes of spotting my mom. We were going fast, making it difficult to see their faces, and I had to twist in my seat and lift myself so I could look out the back window. Her red sweatshirt was nowhere in sight, though.
“What is it?” Devon asked.
“My mom.” I pushed myself up on my knees, hoping I’d just overlooked her. “I need to know where she is.”
Devon said nothing, and I ventured a glance his way to find he and Kiaya sharing a questioning look. They probably thought I was losing my mind. I’d felt like I might be a lot of time since all this started, but not now, because this was totally rational.
“I’m not ready to face it, not yet,” I explained, “but I know I’m going to need to put her down.”
Just saying the words made tears well up in my eyes.
“Oh,” Devon said, and the word seemed to pop out almost on its own.
He looked slightly shocked, as if it had never occurred to him that I’d want to do this, but Kiaya relaxed and gave a slight nod, telling me she got it.
“We’ll make sure it gets taken care of,” she whispered, just loud enough for me to hear, and rested her hand on my shoulder.
“Thanks.”
The dead were all behind us now, headed our way but far off, so we still had plenty of time. Beside me, Devon shifted, moving his hand to the door so he was ready to jump out when we finally came to a stop, but I still hadn’t located my mom. It was making me antsy and tense and causing panic to build inside me as the seconds ticked by and I didn’t spot her. Where the hell was she?
Lisa had just pulled to a stop in front of the garage door when I caught a glimpse of a red shirt at the back of a small group and relaxed. There she was.
I twisted and sank into my seat as Devon shoved his door open. Miller, surprisingly enough, was right behind him, and together they worked to get the heavy garage door open. Once it was and they’d moved to the side, Lisa pulled in, not stopping until the tennis ball my dad had hung from the ceiling pinged against the windshield.
The garage door groaned as it was pulled back down. Seconds later, it banged against the floor and we were thrust into darkness.
Lisa, Kiaya, and I let out a collective sigh of relief.
“We made it,” I said.
“I never had a doubt,” Lisa replied.
She shoved the door open and climbed out, and Kiaya and I followed. Devon was waiting beside the car, but Miller had already gone into the house. He’d left the door open, and by the time the rest of us stepped into the kitchen, everyone had stopped what they were doing.
Buck stood next to the island, a glass beside him. “How’d it go?”
“Not too bad,” Devon said, “in fact, we ran into some other survivors.”
The older man’s eyebrows jumped. “That so?”
“Yup.” Devon nodded twice.
“They have a place not too far from here,” Lisa said. “They invited us to join them.”
“Which means,” Devon pulled his jacket off, “we have a few things to discuss.”
9
The adults had gathered around the dining room table to talk, while the kids stayed in the other room. We’d taken some time to get cleaned up—I’d managed to scrub most of the zombie goo off my precious pink jacket—and catch our breath, but now we needed to plan our next move. Since we’d wanted to make sure the kids were occupied, I’d dug some of the toys I’d gotten out of the car, the doll for Lexi included. Thankfully, she seemed to adore the thing despite how much it still creeped me out. After seeing the blank eyes of the dead, I wasn’t sure I’d ever be able to look at a doll the same way again.
Candles were set up around the room, their flickering light illuminating the various emotions playing across everyone’s faces. Worry for Devon, hope for Lisa, suspicion for Miller. I was somewhere in between, and I doubted I was doing any better at hiding my feelings than they were. Only Kiaya and Buck managed to look neutral. Her because she was always so cool and collected, so practiced at hiding her feelings, and Buck because I got the impression he genuinely wasn’t concerned.
“They seemed trustworthy enough,” Lisa started. “They saved your ass,” she shot a pointed look at Devon, “and warmed to us only after learning you were a cop, which says they’re not impulsive. They also said they take in any kids they find, which to me says a lot about who they are as people.”
“I agree in a way. They left me with an overall good impression,” Devon said, “but we have to remember that people can hide their true natures pretty easily, and I don’t like the idea of packing up and heading over there before we know what’s really going on.”
“And how do we learn what’s going on?” Kiaya asked.
Devon looked my way, and I stiffened, unable to read his expression and having no idea what he was going to say next. Hopefully, it had nothing to do with Doug, because I didn’t really trust my feelings when it came to that subject.
“I’ve actually been giving that a lot of thought,” he began, “and I think staking the place out is the best solution.”
That wasn’t what I’d expected at all, and my mouth dropped open in surprise.
“You mean spying on them?” Kiaya asked, but again, she didn’t give away how she felt about the idea.
“Exactly.” Devon pinned everyone with a serious look before going on. “We picked up a couple pairs of binoculars at the store, as well as some battery powered radios. Rowan knows where the school is, and if we split into teams of two and just watch the place for a little bit, it will give us a better idea of what to expect.”
“It makes sense,” Lisa said, nodding.
“And what do you expect to see?” Miller asked.
It was odd to have him actually participating and not being antagonistic, but he was. Maybe Devon’s comment in the car had helped. It would be nice not to have Miller looking for a fight every time he opened his mouth.
“Hopefully, we don’t see anything but a group trying to survive. But I want to make sure they’re on the up and up. It bothers me that there were only men in the group. Does that mean they don’t have any women with them?” This made Devon frown. “If that’s the case, we need to consider their motives for inviting us. Lisa, Kiaya, and Rowan were all in the store, so I want to be certain their motives had more to do with building something safe than the thought of having three attractive women.”
He had a point, but even I had to admit I couldn’t imagine Doug being involved in a group like that. He’d been too much of a gentleman, and he’d adored his mom. Had loved mine, too.
“What if they do have women there?” I asked rather than bring that up. “What does that say about them?”
Devon’s frown deepened. “I’d want to make sure the women look like they’re free to roam about. That they’re not prisoners. Maybe these guys are just the best equipped to go out, or maybe they’re sexist and think a woman can’t handle herself. I don’t know, but I need to be sure before I risk everyone.”
“Can’t argue wi
th that logic,” Buck said, tilting his glass toward Devon before taking another sip.
I exchanged a look with Kiaya, who was sitting across from me.
“When do you want to go?” Lisa asked. “If we want to go tonight, we need to do it soon. It will be dark before long.”
“We could wait until tomorrow,” Kiaya suggested.
“I know,” Devon said, sighing. “The thing is, we know they went out today, so they’ll be moving around. Unloading the supplies they got. It will give us a better chance to see what they’re like.”
He had a point.
Lisa must have agreed, because she pushed her chair back and stood. “No time like the present. Who’s going?”
More chairs scraped across the hardwood as the others stood, but I stayed sitting, looking everyone over. Devon and Lisa would go for sure, and since I knew the area better than anyone, it made sense for me to go as well. Taking Miller would be a pain in the ass, and we still hadn’t dealt with Buck—plus we had no idea how much he’d had to drink while we were gone—which left Kiaya.
“You up for it?” I asked, focusing on her.
She nodded, her ponytail bobbing with the gesture. “Of course.”
Devon gave her a grateful smile, which faded when I said, “Me, too.” I finally stood. “You’ll need me to show you where the school is and the best place to park.”
He shook his head but didn’t argue before focusing on Lisa. “You?”
“Anything I can do to help.”
“Thanks,” he said, exhaling.
The sound was more exhaustion than exasperation, and in the flickering light from the candles, the shadows under his eyes looked twice as dark. He needed to get some real rest tonight.
“What about me?” Miller asked.
“Four people is enough,” Devon said. “Why don’t you stay back with Buck?”
He framed it as a question, but everyone—probably Buck included—could hear the unspoken words behind the statement. We need someone here who isn’t drunk, even if it is you.
The corporal nodded. “I can do that.”
I hoped to God this meant he’d decided to be a team player.
I looked everyone over. “When do we go?”
“Soon,” Devon replied, but his focus wasn’t on me. “I just want to have a word with Buck first.” His blue eyes flitted back to me. “In private, if that’s okay.”
“Yeah,” I said, the word nearly catching in my throat.
I’d tried to make it sound casual and unconcerned but had failed miserably. Not that it mattered. It was clear by the expression in the older man’s gray eyes that he not only knew what was coming, but he was aware that we all knew as well.
“We’ll get everything together,” Lisa said, already heading for the doorway that led into the kitchen.
Kiaya followed wordlessly, Miller right behind her, but before heading out, the corporal shot a look at Buck. He seemed to be the only one of us who wasn’t trying to hide his interest in what was about to happen. For my own part, I kept my gaze focused on the grooves in the expertly weathered wooden floor beneath my feet as I moved after the others.
“Go on and get it over with,” Buck said just as I passed into the kitchen.
“Do you want to go into the garage so it’s more private?” Devon replied.
There was a sigh and the clinking of glass, followed by a pause, then Buck said, “Might as well, although I don’t see much of a point. Everybody’s gonna find out eventually.”
So, it was a problem. Shit. I’d been hoping he was just trying to ease some of his pain and would snap out of this stupor, or whatever it was, once Devon brought it up.
Footsteps headed through the house, and a few seconds later a door in the other room opened. When it had shut, I finally lifted my gaze from the floor so I could focus on the others.
Lisa was staring into the living room like she could somehow see through the wall, chewing on her lip as she did. At her side, Miller was looking in the same direction, but his expression didn’t seem the least bit concerned. He was more irritated than anything.
“Old fool. He’s going to get his face ripped off if he can’t get himself under control.”
“He hasn’t seemed out of control so far,” Lisa said, trying to stick up for Buck even though she was obviously entertaining the same worry.
“Give him a break, Miller,” I said. “It’s an illness.”
His gaze snapped to me, and I nearly stepped away from the hardness in his eyes. “No. I won’t give him a break, and neither should you. People like that are toxic. You can’t make excuses for them or look the other way. Ever. If you do, they’ll drag you down right along with them.”
There was a fervor, a passion in his eyes I hadn’t seen there before, and something about it told me this was personal for him. He’d said he hadn’t had a great childhood, and he’d refused to talk about it, and while I’d filed that information under the category of we’re not sure who this guy really is, I was starting to wonder. Maybe he didn’t want to talk about it because it was just too painful. Some people wanted to leave the past in the past.
“I’m sorry,” I said.
Miller blinked, surprised, but said nothing.
“I understand where you’re coming from, but I have to hold on to the hope that Buck isn’t unredeemable. It’s just who I am.”
“Then you’re a fool,” he said before stalking off.
His footsteps pounded through the house, a few seconds later disappearing down the stairs.
“That was…” Lisa shook her head like she wasn’t sure what to say.
“Yeah,” I replied with a sigh.
“Sounds like he has some baggage,” Kiaya said.
Her tone was as unemotional as always, but something in her eyes said she got where he was coming from and sympathized. I considered myself a nice person, but having any kind of feelings toward Miller that weren’t revulsion or irritation was still a tough thing to swallow. Even if I was starting to believe he was who he said he was.
Which reminded me…
I slipped my hand into the back pocket of my jeans and pulled out the dog tag I’d found in Meijer, tilting it toward the light so I could once again read the name.
Miller
Marcus J
I hadn’t read it wrong.
“Where’d you get that?” Lisa asked, making me jump.
She and Kiaya were staring at the little rectangle of metal in my hands.
“When we were in Meijer. The chain must have broken during our altercation with the zombie, because it fell off.”
I held it out, and Lisa took it, frowning as she scanned the words. She passed it to Kiaya, who didn’t react as she, too, read the name engraved in the metal.
“So, he’s telling the truth about who he is,” Lisa said.
“Seems like it.”
I gave a shrug because I wasn’t ready to let him off the hook just yet. There was something about Miller that bugged me, and something in my gut told me he wasn’t being totally honest.
Kiaya passed the dog tag to me. “Are you going to give it back?”
“Yeah.” I stared at the words for a moment longer before setting the dog tag on the counter. “I just forgot about it in all the craziness.”
We all turned when the garage door opened, and a second later Devon appeared. Buck was not with him.
“How did it go?” Lisa asked, her voice a whisper even though it seemed the older man had stayed in the garage for the time being.
“Fine,” Devon said. “He’s assured me it’s under control.”
Kiaya lifted her eyebrows. “So, he admitted it?”
“He did.” Devon let out a deep sigh and leaned against the other side of the counter. “He says he’s had a drinking problem for a long time, but he’s always been able to keep his life in order and he doesn’t plan on things changing now.”
“And you believe him?” I asked.
“I haven’t seen anything to th
e contrary. Have you?” He looked from me to Lisa to Kiaya.
We all shook our heads.
“Then I think we need to take him at his word,” Devon replied. “At least for the time being.”
I didn’t have an argument for that, despite what Miller had said, so I only nodded. Kiaya did as well, but Lisa frowned. Since she didn’t disagree, I took it to mean she was on board.
Devon’s gaze fell on the dog tag, and he picked it up, also frowning. “Miller’s?”
“I found it in Meijer and just remembered,” I explained.
The corners of his mouth turned down even more when he read the name printed on the little piece of metal. “He around?”
“Basement,” Lisa said. “He seems to have some adverse feelings toward alcoholics.”
Devon’s expression grew more severe, but he put the dog tag down without comment.
“Are we going to head out soon?” I asked.
“We should,” he replied. “Which means we need to get Miller.”
“I can do it,” I said and scooped the tag up off the counter. “I need to return this to him, anyway.”
“Okay,” Devon replied.
His replies were sounding more and more exhausted with each passing moment, something I was definitely going to bring up when we got back from staking out the school. Devon needed rest. Big time. He wasn’t going to be good to anyone if he had no energy.
“I’ll be right back.” I waved the dog tag in the air.
It seemed dark when I first headed down, but the lower I got, the more a dim light became visible even though I couldn’t yet see where it was coming from. The stairs ended at a wall where my parents had hung posters of some of their favorite movies. When Harry Met Sally, The Breakfast Club, and Jaws. To the left was a closed door that led to the unfinished storage room, and to the right the half bathroom. With no power or water, we were forced to let the pee sit, and it was starting to stink. The typically open door was shut, but the faint stink of urine was still detectable. It was better than other smells, though.
Far Series | Book 2 | Far From Safe Page 19