“Yes ma'am,” I reply. “I'm Luke Hayes. I’m-”
She cuts me off as she comes crashing into me. Her arms fly around me and she holds me tight. “Yes, Luke. I know exactly who you are.”
The emotion is strong in her voice as I wrap my arms around the woman and give her what she needs. “Thank you so much for sticking by my boy,” she murmurs. “I could never begin to explain my gratitude. You saved his life, and for that, I will forever be in your debt. You brought my boy home to me.”
She pulls back but keeps her hands on my shoulders. There are tears in her eyes and it kills me to see. She’s a mom going through a hell of a lot, just like my mom is. My guess is that she’s been going through absolute hell as she tries to help her son get through the pain of Iraq.
The emotion is nearly too much for me to bear, so I press my lips together and try to move past it. “It’s all in a day’s work,” I tell her.
She gives me a stern look and slightly tilts her head to the side. “You and I both know it's a lot more than that.”
I let out a small breath and nod. “Yes ma'am,” I agree. “Is he here?”
“Yes, darling,” she says with a sadness in her eyes. “He’s always here.”
I indicate inside. “May I?”
“Of course, dear,” she says, stepping back out of the doorway. “He’s right out back.”
She leads me inside and I follow her right down to the back door. She gestures out the window and I stop and watch him for a moment. The sight breaks my heart. He looks a mess, drinking bourbon straight from the bottle as though it’s water and I realize this is going to be so much harder than I could have thought.
I look back at his mom. “I apologize for what's about to happen,” I tell her. “You may not want to witness this.”
She gazes out at her boy before turning back to me with a nod. “Do what you have to do,” she says. “He needs it. I don’t know how to help him anymore.”
“I hardly know how to help myself.”
She squeeze’s my shoulder and gives me an affectionate smile before sending me on my way.
I step through the back door and walk the few steps towards him. The smell of alcohol wafts off him and I cringe at what must be sitting in the bottom of his stomach.
“I thought I told you to leave me alone, mom,” he growls as he looks out at the yard, not bothering to raise his eyes.
I ignore his comment and walk straight up to him. He still doesn’t look up.
Ben lifts the bottle to his lips and my hand snakes out, stealing it straight out of his hands. He looks up in outrage and his eyes instantly go wide. “What the fuck?” he snarls in outrage.
I rear back and launch the bottle of bourbon across their large yard. It sails through the air and finally connects with a tree. The glass shatters and Ben watches in disbelief. “What was that for? I was drinking that.”
I ignore him and reach for the front of his shirt. I slam him up against the brick wall and for such a big man, he flops around like a rag doll. “What the fuck is your problem?” I spit.
“You're kidding right?” he scoffs as though he has a right to waste his life away.
“No, I'm not fucking kidding,” I tell him. “I didn't risk my life to save your stupid ass so you could come home and rot away. You’re better than this.”
He shakes his head and can hardly meet my eyes. “Leave me alone, man.”
“Yeah fucking right,” I demand. “I'm not going anywhere until you get yourself cleaned up. You're breaking your mother's heart.”
“What would you know?” he scoffs. “You have it fucking easy. I'm not like you.”
I slam him against the wall until his eyes focus back on me. “Don’t you dare feed me that bullshit. Not for one second have I thought it was easy. You’re a fucking soldier, just like me, now pull it together. You've been given a second chance at life, and right now, you're throwing it away.”
He sets his face into a hard expression as if to tell me to fuck off, but he wouldn’t dare utter the words, not after what we went through.
He lets out a pained sigh as his eyes search mine. “I can’t,” he says, saddened.
I instantly release my hold on his shirt and he slumps to the ground with his arms resting on his knees. “I can’t get the images out of my head. The second I close my eyes, I see it all. I can still smell it. I wake up in the middle of the night and I'm right back there.”
“You don’t think the same shit is happening to me?” I grunt. “It's only just starting to get better now.”
His eyes fly up to mine and he searches for some answers. “How?” he questions quietly.
“Well, I'm not drowning myself in liquor,” I scoff.
He gives me a hard stare and I answer his question. “I talked to someone,” I tell him. “And the second I did, the weight instantly lifted. You should give it a try, it might help you too.”
“You mean a shrink?”
“Not necessarily,” I tell him. “You could talk to a shrink if you think it would help. I talked with my neighbor. Have you told anyone about it?”
“Nah,” he says with a shake of his head. “It’s none of their business.”
I glance back through the window to see his mom leaning against the kitchen counter sipping a cup of tea. “I think you should talk with your mom,” I tell him. “She loves you and it’s clear she just wants the best for you. It'll be the hardest thing you'll ever do, but it will help.”
He continues shaking his head and I see the same hesitation within him that’s inside of me. He doesn’t want to burden her. “I can’t,” he says.
“She’s strong, Ben,” I tell him. “She can handle it.”
He lets out a sigh before looking back at his mom, and I see the utter need to release the weight off his shoulders. “Come on,” I say. “Let’s get you cleaned up and then I'll come with you.”
He’s silent for a while before finally giving in. He nods his head and I hold out a hand to help him up.
He wobbles on his feet and looks up at me. “Who told you?” he questions.
“Sharpy,” I murmur.
“Shit,” he sighs. “So, I should be expecting a visit from him too, then.”
“Yep,” I say.
I lead him back inside and watch as hope starts to rise within his mother’s eyes. I give her an encouraging nod before leading Ben upstairs. I get him into the bathroom and order him to empty the liquor out of his stomach to help sober him up. He resists throwing up until he realizes just how serious I am when I tell him that I'll do it for him. Two seconds later, I cringe as I hear his performance.
I throw him in a cool shower and then twenty minutes later, he looks like a presentable, clean, nineteen-year-old kid who's ready to put the past behind him and start fresh.
I take him downstairs and search out his mom. She sits in the living room and stands when she sees her son. Tears instantly spring to her eyes. “I'm sorry, mom,” Ben says. “I just... it's hard.”
“I know, son,” she says rushing to his side.
“I'll leave you guys to talk,” I tell them then see the panic in Ben's eyes. “I'll be out back if you need me.”
Ben nods and with that, I leave them to talk.
I sit out the back, texting Lexi and checking in on her day while I wait. I find myself grinning like an idiot as she sends me pictures of the bathroom she's still trying to demolish, only there’s water covering the room and it's clear she's had some sort of mishap.
An hour later, the back door opens and Ben comes out with his mom. I get to my feet and turn towards them. Their eyes are both red-rimmed, and I can’t help but notice the way Ben seems to have relaxed just a tiny bit. He gives me a nod of thanks and I return it with one of my own.
Ben's mom steps forward and pulls me into a tight hug. She doesn't say a word, but she doesn’t have to. The meaning is as clear as day. We went through hell and back and now she knows every single detail. I brought her son back to her and I've ju
st helped him to start his journey of healing. “He’ll be alright,” I murmur for only her to hear.
“He will be,” she agrees.
I pull out of her arms before looking at Ben. “I better head off,” I tell him. “I've got a bit of a drive ahead of me.”
He pulls me into his arms and claps me on the back. “Thanks,” he says so quietly I have to strain to hear it.
“No problems, man,” I say. “Just call if you need anything.”
“I will. Good luck with your gym.”
With that, I walk out the door, promising myself that I'll be a better friend and check in on him more often.
I really hope that talking about what he went through will be able to help him in the way it did for me, otherwise, I'm out of ways to help. He’s a good kid and deserves a bright future, and there's no reason he shouldn't be able to get that.
It's just past ten at night when I get home, and as usual, I cross over to Lexi’s door and double check that she's locked it before heading home and collapsing into my bed.
I find myself lying awake for a few hours, unable to dull my mind.
I wish I could have done more for him. I want to be able to take the pain away for him, but it’s the one thing I’ll never be able to do. He needs to learn how to let it go.
I’m lucky I have that little spitfire living next door, otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to let go of it either, and to be honest, I think I’m still learning how to do it. All I know is that every single day I see her, a little more of it fades away.
Shit, I need her. I’m very quickly realizing that I can’t get through the day without talking to her or seeing her.
With a huff, I throw the blankets off and head back out the front door. I lock it behind me before slipping across to Lexi’s.
I find her spare key, right under the welcome mat and let myself in.
I walk down to her guest bedroom and find her tucked up in the bed. I watch her for just a moment before pulling the blanket back and sliding in beside her. She instantly snuggles into me and I wrap my arms around her, pulling her in tighter.
She lets out a moan and that sound is like music to my ears.
Within moments, I finally fall into a deep sleep.
Chapter 17
Lexi
I walk into Charli’s place with a massive grin on my face. The music is playing, the food is scattered over every tabletop, and the bottles of wine are chilling in the fridge.
It’s my kind of party. The perfect recipe for a great night.
It’s been another huge week of renovations and I’m more than happy to be here, letting loose with the girls… well, it was supposed to be all the girls until the boys showed up. So, I guess it’s one big party.
I don’t miss the way Luke’s eyes clock me the second he walks through the door, and I don’t complain when he falls into the couch beside me, instantly putting his arm over my shoulder and pulling me to him.
Every night this week he has snuck into my house after he’s finished work for the night. He climbs into bed with me and holds me throughout the night before showing me the meaning of life when we wake.
It’s incredible and I can’t get enough of it. He’s incredible, you know, apart from the ridiculous pranks he continues to play like putting glitter in the air vents of my truck so that when I turned on the air conditioning, my truck turned into a pink glittery mess. I want to be furious with me but he gets this look in his eye and gives me this big wolfish grin, making it one hundred percent worth it. That smile is so intoxicating that it should be illegal.
My only issue is how much I like it. I’m terrified this means something so much more to me. He tells me all the time that he can’t get enough of me, but he has never once indicated that it could be something more than physical.
I had asked him that first night to label it, but he didn’t want to do that. It kind of hurt so I’ve avoided asking again. I’m terrified he’ll say it’s just fun or that it’s only about the sex, as to me, it’s so much more than that.
I’m starting to fall for this guy. He’s quickly becoming the reason I wake up in the morning. Just the idea of getting to see him that night drives me on. I’ve never felt this before, not even when I was marrying Jeremy. It just goes to show how wrong I was about that one.
But this… this doesn’t feel wrong. It’s so right on so many levels. Luke Hayes is my man even if he doesn’t know it yet.
His finger draws little circles on my shoulder, pulling me out of my head. I look up at him, wondering what he needs. “You alright?” he murmurs. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”
I consider bringing it up with him, but now isn’t the time, and I’m not ready for him to start retreating back into himself yet. I don’t want to frighten him away with my girly feelings. “Nothing,” I smile. “I’m all good.”
“Are you sure?” he questions, squeezing my shoulder.
“Yeah,” I tell him. “I’m more than good.”
At that, a proud smile rips across his face and he presses a kiss to my forehead.
I feel the eyes of our friends on us and I guess neither of us have really said anything about this sudden occurrence. I mean, I don’t know if he has said anything to the boys, but the last time I was with the girls, we were busy getting payback for his asshole tendencies.
“So,” I hear Rylee’s voice over the sound of the party. “What are you guys doing here? It’s supposed to be our girl’s night.”
“We crashed,” Cole tells her with a grunt. “Xander and I had just finished training and the guys were done with their sessions, so we locked up early.”
“As simple as that, huh?” she replies.
“Yeah, we couldn’t let you girls have too much fun,” he says “You guys need a little supervision on your girl’s night. The last time we let you out of our sights, you broke and entered.”
I can’t help but grin. “Technically no breaking got done,” I remind him, making both he and Luke roll their eyes.
“Does this mean we’re entitled to crash your boy’s nights?” Imogen pipes up.
“Whoa,” Caden says as Jace scoffs. “Fuck no.”
“Hold your horses, little sister,” Cole laughs. “Our boy’s nights are a sacred tradition. It’s not to be messed with.”
Imogine scoffs. “You can take your boy’s nights and shove them up your ass.”
“Come on, babe,” Caden chuckles. “Don’t be like that. Cole’s serious. Boy’s night just can’t be messed with.”
I go to reach for my drink when I realize I’ve already demolished it. I look up at Luke. “Do you want another beer?” I ask, noticing his drink is nearly gone.
His eyes soften as he smiles down at me. “Sure.”
I get up from the couch as Cole and Caden gang up on Imogen, giving her hundreds of reasons why girls night doesn’t get to be labeled as sacred, and I make my way into the kitchen.
“Oops, sorry,” I say as I bump into Charli at the fridge.
“No problem,” she smiles as she reaches into the fridge and pulls out the bottle of wine. “Is this what you’re after?”
“It sure is,” I say as I take the bottle from her and reach around to grab a beer for Luke. I walk over to the counter and place everything down so I can pour a fresh glass of wine.
Charli walks over and places her empty glass down beside mine. “So…,” she says with nothing but curiosity in her voice. “What the hell is going on between you and Luke? He can’t keep his eyes… or hands off you,” she says. “Look, even now he’s still watching you.”
I look up and am not surprised to find those dark eyes of his already gazing into mine. I can’t help the shy smile that rips across my face. He smirks at my reaction and I try my best to concentrate on pouring the wine into the glasses rather than all over the counter.
“Yeah,” I tell her. “I guess he’s a bit infatuated at the moment.”
“Infatuated?” she scoffs. “It’s more than that.”
“Do you think so?” I question with hope. “I’m not sure. I think he just likes getting me in bed.”
“What?” she gasps quietly as to not draw attention to our conversation. “Are you guys sleeping together?” I keep my eyes focused on the wine bottle and try my best to hide the grin on my face. “Holy shit.”
I watch in amazement as she grabs Luke’s beer off the table, rushes back over to him and thrusts it into his hands before telling the girls there’s a situation in the kitchen that requires all of their help, which apparently, they already understand as she has something juicy for their ears.
Within seconds, all the girls are hovering in the kitchen and Charli ushers us all out the back door, far away from the guys, making sure to bring the wine.
“What’s going on?” Cami questions as we fall into the outdoor setting.
Charli can hardly hold in her excitement. “Little miss here has been sleeping with Luke,” she announces as the grin rips across my face for the hundredth time tonight.
“What?” they shriek and gasp as Imogen calls out. “I freaking knew it. He’s so into you.”
“Is she serious?” Zara asks.
I nod my head.
“Holy shit,” Izzy says with wide eyes. “I’d like to be a part of that sandwich. Give me every detail.”
I can’t help but laugh. “What do you want to know?”
“I don’t even know. That man is… wow. He’s like a god. His body…” She lets out a low groan just thinking about it.
“Ok,” Cami cuts in. “Before Izzy asks you how big his dick is, how the hell did this happen? I thought he drove you insane.”
“He does drive me insane,” I tell them. “Do you know he put flour on my ceiling fan during the heat wave. My place looked like a baking massacre.”
“Shit,” Rylee grunts. “I knew we should have taken his place one step further.”
“Right,” I agree.
“You’re getting off track,” Cami demands, wanting her question answered. “How did this happen?”
I smile as I remember just how it had happened. “Well, after we did our thing to his place, he couldn’t resist barging his way in and demanding I fix it all up. So, I made a deal with him that if he told me about Iraq, I’d clean his place.”
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