False Colours

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False Colours Page 22

by Джорджетт Хейер


  The cloud descended again on to Evelyn’s brow. He replied curtly: “About £20,000—as near as I can discover.”

  There was a frozen silence. Then Kit got up, and went to pick up the decanter. “I think, Eve,” he said carefully, “that we had best have a little more cognac!”

  15

  Evelyn picked up his glass, and held it out. “I daresay you need it more than I do,” he observed, “I shouldn’t have thrown the total at you like that.”

  “For how long have you known?”

  “Oh, some time now! Not all at once, however. I don’t know that I have the total sum yet, but I think it isn’t more than that.”

  “How much of it is owed to tradesmen?”

  “The least part—though there’s a pretty staggering amount owing to Rundell & Bridge, and there’s no saying what she may owe her dressmaker. Rundell & Bridge don’t dun her: they’re far too long-headed! I should think they must have been jewellers to the Earls of Denville ever since they set up their sign, wouldn’t you? And I shouldn’t wonder at it if they have a pretty shrewd notion that if Mama don’t pay them now, I shall, later! I can’t tell about Celeste: you see, Kester, poor Mama doesn’t understand! The ready just—just slides through her fingers! She don’t know where it goes to, and I’m damned if I do! You never know what she may do next, either! I suppose we always knew that she was in debt, but it wasn’t until some time after my father died that I discovered how far she’d run into Dun territory, or that she’s been borrowing money for years!” He laughed, but not very mirthfully. “Poor darling! If you gave her a century tomorrow, because she was all to pieces, and being dunned by the harpy who designs her hats, the chances are she’d give it away to one of her indigent old friends! And even if she does settle the most pressing of her debts with the money she’s borrowed, she don’t see—and you can’t make her!—that she’s no more in the clear than she was before! You might not know this—I didn’t, until a year or two ago, and there’s not another soul on earth I’d tell it to.”

  “Of course not.” Kit stood frowning down at the glass cupped between his hands. “I didn’t know, but I’ve learnt a good deal since I stepped into your shoes. By the way, Eve, my feet are bigger than yours, so I didn’t step into your shoes!”

  “Thank God for that, clodcrusher!”

  Kit smiled, rather abstractedly. He said, after a slight pause: “Does it ever occur to you that it was a case, rather, of Poor Papa?”

  “No!”

  The word was uttered explosively. Kit glanced up quickly, and saw in Evelyn’s eyes an expression of implacable hatred, which startled him. “Well, don’t eat me!” he said lightly. “I only meant—”

  “I know what you meant! And it doesn’t occur to me! Nor would it occur to you, if you knew all I learned from Mama when this—this business first crashed upon me! She was seventeen when my father married her! As innocent as Patience, but not reared as Patience was! What she told me about that household—! All Grandmother Baverstock ever cared for was that her daughters should be taught accomplishments, so that they might make good marriages! As for economy, Cosmo is the only Cliffe I ever heard of who knows how to hold household! My father—years older than she was!—fancied himself to be in love with her! Love? He was dazzled by her face, and her captivating ways, and had no more love for her than I have for Cressida Stavely! That was soon over! Everything in Mama which makes her so lovable he disliked! Cold, selfish—! Kester, he drove her off—pokered up when she showed her affection, in that impulsive way she has! It was not the thing for Lady Denville to allow the world to suspect she had a heart! Can you wonder at it that she turned from him, let herself be drawn into—Well, never mind! You don’t understand that, Kester, but I do, and I tell you that whatever sins or follies Mama has committed are to be laid at my father’s door!”

  “Take a damper!” Kit advised him. “I’m entirely at one with you in believing that Papa was grossly to blame; but dearly as I love Mama I can see how maddening she must have been to a man of his cut! You think he could have taught her to hold household: you may be right, but I doubt it. Now, don’t fly up into the boughs again! None of that signifies today: it’s past mending. What we have to do, Eve, is to find a way to tow her off Point Non-Plus now. I know she stands in Edgbaston’s debt, and in Child’s. Anyone else?”

  “Yes, several people’s—including Ripple!”

  “Well, he isn’t dunning her, at all events,” said Kit thoughtfully.

  Evelyn’s angry flush had faded, but it surged up again. “What difference docs that make? Are you suggesting that I should permit Mama to remain in debt to him? Or anyone else! Would you be content to turn a blind eye to such obligations?”

  “No,” confessed Kit. “They must all be paid, of course, but not all immediately. It’s the devil of a sum to raise, Eve!”

  “Fiddle! I could do it in the twinkling of a bedpost, if I could but persuade my uncle to wind up the Trust!”

  Kit shook his head. “You must know he won’t. He’s not going to like this proposed marriage of yours.”

  “Then he should! He’s been preaching sobriety to me from the day my father died! If I would become less volatile he would gladly wind up the Trust! If he wasn’t cutting a sham—and I acquit him of that!—he should welcome my marriage to such a girl as Patience!”

  “Unfortunately,” said Kit, grimacing, “he is enthusiastically welcoming your marriage to Cressy. You had a letter from him this morning. I’ll give it to you.”

  “I don’t want it. Does he imagine that with my heart given to Patience marriage to Cressy would make me less volatile?”

  Kit looked a little quizzically at him. “What he will imagine, Eve, is that you’re as volatile as ever you were, and will soon have formed a lasting passion for another lady!”

  “He’ll discover his mistake! I don’t deny I’ve fancied myself in love a dozen times, or that I didn’t think even the liveliest of my flirts a dead bore, after a few weeks of dangling about her! To own the truth, when I offered for Cressy, I’d reached the conclusion that I was volatile! Hence Clara—and several other bits of muslin! Then I met Patience, and knew that I had never been in love before. She’s not dashing, or lively, or full of fun and wit, and I dare say you might not consider her to be as beautiful as some others I could name. But I have been constantly in her company, and the very notion that I could think her a dead bore is so absurd—so fantastic—Oh, I can’t explain it to you, Kester!”

  “Listen, Eve!” Kit said. “You needn’t explain it to me! I know, and if I didn’t it would make no odds! All that concerns us is the light in which my uncle will look upon the marriage. There’s never been any hiding of teeth between us, so I’ll tell you without roundaboutation that my uncle will be at one with Askham in thinking it a most unequal match. Which, from what you’ve told me, I collect that it is, if one looks at it from a worldly point of view.”

  “Dash it, Kester, I haven’t fallen in love with the daughter of a Cit, or a mere smatterer. Her birth may not be noble, but it is as respectable as my own! The Askhams are not fashionable, but they are well-connected, so if you are picturing to yourself a family of—of dowdy provincials, you’re fair and far off! Askham is a man of culture, his wife a most superior woman, and Patience herself as much beyond my touch as any star in the sky! As for fortune, my uncle has said himself it’s unimportant!”

  Kit, well aware that his twin was placing too liberal a construction on Lord Brumby’s words, asked bluntly: “What is her fortune?”

  Evelyn flushed. “She has none! Oh, that’s to say none that my uncle would consider worth the mention! Askham is not affluent. You may say that he was born to an independence! I should describe his circumstances as comfortable rather than handsome, and his family is large. He told me frankly that he could not dower Patience with anything more than a sum that would seem paltry to me; and I told him, as frankly, that I’m not hanging out for an heiress, and should think myself fortunate to win Patie
nce if she hadn’t as much as a grig to call her own!”

  “I dare say! But if you think to make a hand of it by telling all that to my uncle it must be midsummer moon with you! Good God, his notion of what is due to your consequence is as top-lofty as ever Papa’s was, and pretty near as stiff-rumped!”

  “Damn my consequence! When I think that if it were not so imperative for me to get possession of my fortune I shouldn’t care a straw for my uncle’s opinion—But it is imperative!”

  “I’ve been thinking about that,” said Kit. “Not in Dun territory on your own account, are you ?”

  “Of course I’m not! However volatile I may be!” Evelyn snapped.

  “Then it’s merely a question of Mama’s debts, and I think—”

  He was interrupted by a sudden crack of laughter from his twin. “The word I like is merely!” Evelyn told him.

  “—and I think,” repeated Kit, “that the best way out of the difficulty is for me to settle them.”

  There was a moment’s astonished silence before Evelyn demanded: “Have you run mad, Kester? You can’t surely be bosky after a couple of brandies!”

  “Neither mad nor bosky. It hadn’t occurred to me until a minute ago, and I fancy it didn’t occur to you either: we’ve been forgetting that legacy of mine, Eve!” He walked across the room to set down his glass, and came back to the day-bed. “I haven’t been able to go into things with the lawyers yet, but I collect the stocks ought to realize something in the neighbourhood of £20,000. There are no strings tied to the bequest, so—”

  “So that makes everything as right as a ram’s horn! I wonder that I shouldn’t have thought of it myself. We’ll call it a wedding-present, shall we?”

  Kit grinned, but said: “Now, don’t be a gudgeon, twin! If you—”

  “I a gudgeon?” gasped Evelyn. “Well, if that don’t beat the Dutch!”

  “Gammon! I’ve as much right as you to rescue Mama!”

  “You haven’t, and you know it! The obligation was my father’s, and it has descended to me! Try playing off your tricks on someone who ain’t your twin, you unconscionable humbug!”

  “Call it a loan!” suggested Kit. “It was only a windfall, remember! My father left me very well provided for, and I don’t stand in need of it. You can pay it back to me when you’re thirty, after all!”

  “Oh, do stop talking such slum, Kester!” begged Evelyn. “You might just as well, for there’s no power on earth that would make me consent to such a scheme! Would you consent to it, if our positions were reversed?”

  “No, I don’t suppose I should,” Kit admitted.

  “Well, I know you wouldn’t!” Evelyn got up. “I must be off, or poor old Pinny won’t get a wink of sleep: she means to undress me! Kester, could you spare me Challow tomorrow? I want him to drive me to Brighton. I didn’t see Silverdale, you know, and I must. He’s got a damned mischief-making tongue, and if he were to discover the truth about that brooch it would be all over London within a sennight.”

  “You didn’t see him! I hoped that that business at least had been settled.”

  “I couldn’t. I found he was visiting the Regent. That was a facer to start with! I’ve never exchanged more than half-a-dozen words with the Regent inmy life, and that was at the levée my father dragged us both to at our come-out! Well, is it likely I should be acquainted with him? He’s old enough to be my father, and Papa never was one of his set. I hadn’t thought it would be difficult to get my name sent in to Silverdale, but it was dashed difficult—particularly when I took out my card-case, and found it empty! I shouldn’t wonder at it if they thought I was an impostor, at the door! In any event, they said that his lordship had gone into the country that day. I don’t know if it was true, or not, but there was no arguing the point, so I desired them, with haughty composure (though not by half as haughty as theirs!), to inform his lordship that I was sorry to have found him absent, but should hope to have the good fortune to see him when I returned to Brighton, within a sennight or so. I couldn’t remain in Brighton, you see, because I wanted to visit Clara before returning to London, and I was a trifle pressed for time. Which reminds me, Kester! Send Fimber down to me tomorrow, will you? I want some clothes to wear, my snuff, and some visiting-cards! He can help me to dress, too.”

  “I’ll do that, but you won’t need your cards, and you won’t need Challow. You’re not going to Brighton, so don’t think it! For one thing, we can’t have two Denvilles at large—and one of them with his arm in a sling! For another, you’re in no case to be jauntering about. I’ll go, if you’ll tell me exactly what you want me to say to Silver-dale, and how I’m to redeem the brooch. If it’s by a draft on the Bank, can you write it?”

  “I should think I might be able to, but it isn’t. By rag-money, because I am acting on Mama’s behalf, and it is she who is to redeem the brooch. I’ve got a roll of soft in my nightbag, and Fimber can bring it to you tomorrow. Kester, will you do it for me? I ought not to permit you to, but by now Brighton is probably as full as it can hold of people who know us, and I do see that it won’t do for me to be in two places at once—and in one of them with a broken shoulder! That’s the sort of thing that always gets to be known! And I dare say,” he added, in a thoughtful tone, “that you know much better than I do how to force your way into royal residences!”

  “One of my chief duties!” agreed Kit. “Sit down again while I put on some clothes, and I’ll go with you to Pinny’s cottage, and put you to bed. You can give me your roll of soft, too.”

  “You’d much better go to bed yourself,” said Evelyn, sitting down on the arm of the chair. “I can manage very well, you know. But I’d liefer be undressed by you than Pinny—and we’ve the devil of a lot to discuss still!”

  “We aren’t going to discuss anything tonight,” said Kit, tossing his dressing-gown on to the bed. “Too late—and you’re worn to a bone, Eve!”

  “Oh, no! Just a trifle out of curl still, that’s all! Shall I go and wake Mama up?”

  “No, don’t! You’d stay talking to her till daylight. I’ll tell her first thing, and I should think she’ll be at Pinny’s a good hour before breakfast!”

  “No, no Kester! Mama don’t leave her room until an hour after breakfast!”

  “She does when we have our Aunt Emma staying with us!” replied Kit, grinning, as he stepped into a pair of breeches. “My aunt is an early riser! Did Pinny tell you that we are enjoying the rare felicity of entertaining her, and my uncle, and our beloved cousin?”

  “She did! Also that Ripple is one of the party! What the devil do you mean by inviting that bag-pudding to Ravenhurst?” demanded Evelyn.

  “I didn’t: it was Mama’s doing—but I’ve no objection. He’s not such a bag-pudding as we were used to think, you know. He and Cressy are the only ones—other than Fimber and Challow, of course—who have yet found me out! You must teach me your way of opening a snuff-box, Eve! I made a mull of that—and the snuff in it was dry!”

  “Oh, shame!” Evelyn exclaimed. He produced his snuffbox from his pocket, and flicked it open. “Thus!”

  “Oh, very deedy!” said Kit approvingly. “Lefthanded, too!”

  “Good God, twin, I never use my right hand!” Evelyn said, shocked.

  Kit chuckled, but said, as he knotted a handkerchief round his neck: “Why do you hold the old fellow in such dislike? I know we were used to think him a bobbing-block, but there’s no harm in him that I can discover; and you must own that he’s good-natured!”

  “He makes Mama ridiculous!” Evelyn said resentfully.

  “Oh, I don’t know that! He may be barrel-bellied, but he’s a tremendous swell! When you think of the position he’s held ever since I can remember, and his wealth, which I understand to be staggering, it’s more of a triumph for Mama, to have kept him tied to her apron-strings all these years!” said Kit cheerfully. “I’ll tell you this, Eve! I’d liefer by far have him dangling after her than one or two of the other insinuating court cards I saw i
n Mount Street! That fellow, Louth, for one! If ever I saw a loose-screw—! I’d have given something to have tipped him a settler!”

  Evelyn said quickly: “Yes, so would I, but there’s nothing in it, Kester! There has never been anything since we were children, when she was so lonely, and unhappy—she told me herself, begging me not to judge her harshly! I judge her harshly—!”

  Kit looked across at him, a question in his eyes. “Matlock?”

  “Yes. Didn’t you know?”

  Kit shook his head. “No. That is, I’ve sometimes wondered, looking back, and remembering things that happened then. Poor little Mama! How should either of us judge her, who have had all her love? Did my uncle know?”

  “Can you doubt it?” said Evelyn savagely.

  “I suppose not. Well, that settles it! Whatever else we may do to bring her about, we will not approach him in the matter!”

  “I should rather think not! But, Kester—” He broke off, looking at Kit with a remorseful gleam in his eyes. “I wish I hadn’t told you that! I can’t think how I came to do so, except that I didn’t recollect that you’ve been away since we came down from Oxford. It doesn’t seem like that, does it? I wish you will forget I told you: you may, you know!” The remorse faded, his irrepressible smile leaping into his eyes. “She has done so! Of course, if anything were to happen to recall it to her mind, she would remember, but not otherwise! For, after all, dearest,” he continued, in exact and loving imitation of his wayward parent, “it happened a very long time ago, and crying over spilt milk is such a melancholy thing to do!”

 

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