by B. Groves
Mary had asked for day shift right after Jessica was attacked, because when her dad was away, she didn’t want to leave her alone at night in the house. Jessica knew how to use the guns they had, but Mary still didn’t feel comfortable.
“Was there a note?” Mary inquired.
Mark shook his head. “Not that we’re aware of.”
Mary nodded and looked over at Jessica and smiling slightly in consolation. Jessica knew she was probably looking green around the gills from the news.
Jessica tried to keep her thoughts together, but by the same token she was highly confused. She wondered why Rick committed suicide, and for that matter, why he did it near the mirror.
She wondered if he was trying to seek help from The Spirit of the Mirror again, but was rejected and killed himself. She had to make sure she went to see the Spirit of the Mirror in secret and ask him about it.
She pondered if the mirror knew all along that he had been there, and didn’t want to upset her.
She noticed Mark shooting her glances, and wanted to smile at him, but held the grim look on her face. She hoped they could have some time alone again soon.
“Do either of you have any further questions?” Mark asked, glancing in between them.
“No, Sheriff. Thank you for letting us know,” Mary said.
“Yes, thank you,” Jessica added, looking over at her mother.
Mark gathered his hat and jacket, standing up from the seat at the table.
Jessica stood and looked at her mother. “Are you going to call Dad?”
Mary still looked shaken and said, “Yes, in a minute.”
“I am going to walk the Sheriff out,” Jessica said.
Mary shrugged and Mark said, “That won’t be necessary….”
“Please….” Jessica insisted, making Mark agree.
Mark shook hands with her mom, and Jessica followed Mark out of the door.
Jessica shut the door behind her and Mark turned to face her.
She was suddenly at a loss for words as she looked into his deep blue eyes. She could tell it had been a hard month on him with Sara Miller and now Rick Tanner. She could have sworn some wrinkles were developing around his eyes.
This was more than he was used to in this sleepy town.
“Actually, I do want to talk to you alone, but that can wait,” he said.
“When?” Jessica’s face burned red again, because she didn’t want to sound like a desperate little schoolgirl . “Sorry,” she mumbled.
“No, you’re fine. I’m not sure, but…..”
“My mom should be going back to night shift soon,” Jessica offered, turning an even deeper shade of red from embarrassment. She felt like such a child right now.
Mark smiled, catching Jessica’s obvious embarrassment saying, “I hope you know that I am not trying to hurt your feelings or anything……”
Jessica shook her head, and thought how awkward this was, but knew her mom was around, and she didn’t want to say too much in case certain ears were listening through the door.
“I understand. You have a reputation to uphold, and I guess what happened between us would hurt it,” she answered disappointed, but knew he had to keep his job.
Mark ran a hand over his shaved head. “You could say that, and believe me, I don’t like it either.”
Jessica felt her insides melt when he told her that, wanting to run into his arms and kiss him, but she held her ground, though her hormones were in overdrive right now. She loved seeing him in uniform. “I do understand, and I appreciate that you were at my game last week.”
Mark smiled and said, “You did really good.”
“Thanks!”
“There is something I wanted to ask you though before I go,” he said.
“What?”
Before Mark could ask, his radio went off. There was a car accident off of the interstate exit.
“I guess it will have to wait,” Jessica groaned slightly. She didn’t want him to leave.
“I better go,” he said.
“Okay,” she answered.
“Are you still taking your walks in the woods? If so, please be careful,” he said, as he opened the cruiser door.
Jessica smiled softly about his concern. “Not often anymore. It just freaks me out that I could have been out there and found Rick.” Jessica shivered from the thought.
“I’m glad you didn’t, believe me,” he said.
“Are you alright Mark?” Jessica asked, concerned for his well-being, and the faraway look in his blue eyes.
“Yeah, I just have a lot on my plate right now,” he answered, as he gunned the engine.
“’Bye Jessica,” he said.
“’Bye Mark.”
Jessica stood on the porch for a moment inhaling deep breaths, after Mark pulled away. She could not believe that Rick Tanner was dead, and had been right by her the whole time, and she never knew it. Now she knew what that smell was that day she was in the woods, and it almost made her throw up.
She started to shiver again, and went back into the house.
Her mother stood at the edge of the kitchen with a raised eyebrow.
“What?” Jessica asked, while Mary continued to stare.
Mary sighed a little. “You know there is so much I could say. I don’t approve, I think he’s too old……you’re not even out of high school yet……”
“What are you talking about?” Jessica demanded, getting a little annoyed.
“You know what Jessica, I know you think I’m stupid, but I’m not. I saw the looks you were both exchanging,” Mary answered.
“I never said that Mom, and what do you want me to say?”
“I have a feeling you are doing all of this for him, and not for yourself.”
Jessica shook her head in disbelief. “Not at all. I am doing all this to make you and Dad happy. Have you forgotten everything you’ve said to me the last few years?”
“Don’t be mad at me Jessica. If not, then I’m wrong, but I know what I saw, and at least I can say he’s a cop, so that makes him a good choice, right?” Mary raised her eyebrow again.
“Mark and I are just friends…”
“Mark?”
“Yeah, so?”
“Not, Sheriff?” Mary confirmed.
Jessica raised her hands in exasperation. “You found me out, I guess.”
“I’m not mad,” Mary said, putting up her hands in defense.
“Then what are you?”
Mary tilted her head in thought. “I’m not sure. I know young girls like older guys, and I can see why you like him. He seems decent enough.”
“I have nothing to say about Mark,” Jessica said, starting up the stairs.
“Alright Jessica. You do what you want,” Mary said, in a defeated voice.
“There is nothing I want to do Mom!” Jessica exclaimed, going into her room and closing the door behind her.
Jessica paced her room, and thought of how she could continue to associate with The Spirit of the Mirror.
She wondered if the spirit had made Rick Tanner commit suicide.
She wondered if that would be her…..
She knew she would have to talk to The Spirit of the Mirror soon, and see what he had to say.
She wondered if he knew all along that Rick Tanner was hanging there, and did not want to scare her.
He had to know, he just had to.
Jessica knew she would have to wait as the investigation continued for Rick Tanner. She couldn’t risk getting caught in the woods while the investigators were snooping around out there.
She also didn’t want to make her mom suspicious about her and Mark either.
She did smile as she thought of Mark. She knew she should be hurt that he hadn’t gotten together with her since the night they kissed, but she knew he was trying to do the right thing.
She didn’t know if she was in love with him, but knew she really liked him and wanted him to touch her again.
She thought of getting Th
e Spirit to help her with Mark’s feelings, but decided that Mark was nothing she wanted the Spirit of the Mirror to touch.
He was hers, and hers alone. If she wanted it, she would go after him herself.
Jessica sat down when Alex called to get some help with his Geometry. He was failing it now, and Jessica needed the distraction.
Chapter 28
Jessica knew all along that she would never fit in. The basketball team was winning a lot of games, and she was the starter, she was the top scorer, and she had her fans from the school, but she knew, she always knew she would be an outsider. And, she knew who was causing it. She just didn’t know what to do about it.
The team was well on their way to the championships, but after every game most of the team still ignored her. She knew there were a few times they threw the games to make her look bad, and she could feel the frustration and anger setting in as time went on.
She thought she would be the hero in school by now, but she realized that it wasn’t the situation. She would look into the stands, still seeing signs cheering on Kelly and her group. “Do it for Mandy!” Some of them would say. The only ones who cheered her on with sincerity were Tessa and Alex. She had to give Danny some credit, he did start talking to her again and gave her encouragement, but it was not the same.
There was another thing that was bothering her and that was Tessa’s health. Over the holidays she had gone to the hospital twice for complications from her diabetes and was not looking anywhere near healthy anymore.
Jessica was starting to wonder if Tessa would make it to prom or even graduation. She wondered if her best friend would even become the doctor she always dreamed of becoming.
There was one thing that Jessica was happy about, and that was the weight she had lost from playing basketball. The standard uniform had barely fit her at the beginning of the season, but now it was getting looser, and she would stand and admire herself in the mirror when she wore it.
It was now after Christmas, and she recalled she was also shocked to see the 1978 Monte Carlo sitting in her driveway on Christmas morning.
She burst into tears as she spotted it that morning, and hugged her parents for the longest time when they handed her the keys.
She loved it. She took it for a drive all day that day with Tessa, who insisted she was feeling better, and even saw Mark, who stood admiring the car when she was bragging about it.
She felt bad that he had duty that day, but he insisted he was fine with it. She also felt bad that he was missing his mother during Christmas, and he said working was a distraction for him.
He came to more of her games when they were on home court, and she was really happy to see him there. They hadn’t really spoken privately ever since Rick Tanner committed suicide, but they would get into conversations here and there.
Since she had been so busy with school, basketball, and her new car she had almost forgotten about The Spirit of the Mirror.
Now, she was on winter break, and her mother had gone in that night. Her father was working late locally right now, so she had a chance to finally make it into the woods to see her guardian angel, as she referred to him.
Jessica stood there as her booted feet crunched the hard snow that now lay on the ground.
She admire the beauty of the area. It had snowed hard the night before, and was so quiet and pristine that she just wanted to enjoy the moment.
The sun was peeking out from the puffy clouds in the sky, and she was looking forward to the New Year, even with other things going on.
She wiped her face as some snowflakes blew towards her in the gentle wind, and The Spirit appeared before her.
“Jessica, it is so very nice to see you, child,” The Spirit said with his reflective smile.
“You too, Spirit,” she answered, returning the smile.
His feet also crunched in the snow, reminding Jessica that her angel was still very real, and not a figment of her imagination. “I have not seen you in a while. I think I know what is troubling you,” he said.
Jessica was very frustrated, answering, “I am sure you probably know what is bothering me.”
Jessica kicked some snow with her boot and looked up to The Spirit. She could feel the tears coming, but she tried to blink them away.
“I guess I expected better from these people, but I was wrong,” she said with her voice catching slightly.
The Spirit looked down at her sympathetically.
“You are winning games?” He asked.
“Yes.”
“Your team is well on its way to a state championship?”
“Yes?”
“You and the Sheriff are friendly?” He asked.
Jessica’s head shot up at the mention of the Sheriff. “Yes,” Jessica answered, still kicking around the snow.
“Then what is it that troubles you child?” He asked.
Jessica took a deep breath, and wiped her now wet eyes.
“I still don’t fit in. They ignore me all the time, and I have not even been invited to parties they have. They have thrown games on me, and I just don’t know what to do,” she said with a slight sob.
“Is there something else?”
Jessica walked around the snow with her hands in fists. “I know this is all on purpose. They think I did this to take revenge on Mandy……..”
“In a way, you did,” he pointed out.
“Yes, but it is not about that anymore. It is about doing what my parents always wanted me to do,” Jessica said. “I am doing it, and I’m still miserable.”
Jessica growled slightly and kicked some snow out of frustration.
“I have learned Jessica that most people do not change, they stay the same no matter how much you try to make them. A human will take habit over changes any day. You are a threat to these girls and their status at the school, one that they have held onto for so long even without Mandy Cooper’s presence. She was just a part of it. I tried my best to help Rick Tanner, and in the end he did not want to change either,” The Spirit explained. “I can only do so much for those I help.”
Jessica turned and looked at The Spirit and asked, “Did you know Rick was hanging only feet from us when he was found?”
The Spirit turned and looked to where they found Rick Tanner. “I did, but I did not want to alarm you.”
Jessica nodded believing him. “Did he come to you before he hanged himself?”
Jessica thought she saw a flash in his white eyes, but it happened so fast that she wasn’t sure if she’d imagined it.
The Spirit faltered before answering her. “He did, but I could not save him.”
Jessica could see that The Spirit didn’t want to talk about it, and she decided not to push the issue. Rick Tanner was dead, and he no longer posed a threat to exposing her or The Spirit. She should just leave it at that. Yet, something was tugging at her conscience, and she tried to shove it away.
The Spirit of the Mirror has done nothing but great things for her, so why would she even doubt that he was capable of anything else? Was he?
The Spirit picked up on her doubts and came closer to her. Jessica could see her reflection in his face, but his glowing white eyes seemed to be sincere.
“Jessica, I want you to erase all doubt from your mind about Rick Tanner. I could not save him. I am only able to speak with special people here on Earth, and you are one of the chosen ones,” he further explained to her.
Jessica looked straight into his glowing eyes again. She noticed how his eyes gleamed in the darkness of the forest, almost taking her breath away with their beauty. It was mystifying. In fact, she could not pull away, and she finally had to force herself from his grasp.
She could have sworn something came over her while he held her shoulders, like she just lost something, but she tried to shake it off. She turned to look at the spirit, and said, “I know, and you really have no idea how much I appreciate everything you’ve done for me.”
The Spirit smiled slightly and said, “The Sheri
ff seems to be on your mind as well.”
Jessica scoffed. “Among other things.”
“Will this be your next wish? Would you like help with him?”
She stood there and thought about it for a moment. Mark was an honorable and stand up kind of guy. He was a good Sheriff, and well liked in the community.
Any girl would be lucky to have him, and Jessica knew she had strong feelings for him. He had treated her with nothing but respect these past few months. She knew he was still holding back because of her age, and she had to admit as much as she hated it, at the same time she would not want him to ruin his career.
She knew all she had to do was give The Spirit a gift, and the Sheriff would be probably be head over heels in love with her.
She smiled to herself from the thought.
However, the smile only lasted so long as Jessica concluded something. She knew she could have so much with The Spirit of the Mirror helping her, but she also knew the consequences of wanting those things.
She lowered her head. Who knew what could happen with Mark, but to her he was untouchable to the Spirit.
After a few more moments she turned to The Spirit who patiently waited for her answer and said, “No. Mark is out of reach.”
The Spirit nodded, answering, “As you wish, Jessica.”
Jessica thought about Tessa too, but now was not the time to ask for help with her best friend. She would wait and see what happens next.
“You seem to be torn Jessica,” The Spirit prodded a little.
Jessica agreed, still lost in thought. “I am, but I think I am going to go. I want to wait and see what happens next with school, and the team.”
“Of course.”
“Will you still be here Spirit?” Jessica asked hopefully.
“I am always here for you child,” he answered smiling.
Chapter 29
Jessica stood in the locker room, almost a month later, after practice and eyed the other girls warily as they got dressed to go home that night.
Jessica gazed down at her practice uniform truly feeling alone inside of the locker room.
Her birthday was in two weeks, and she wanted to have a party to celebrate turning eighteen, as well as the team making the playoffs based on ranking in their division. Jessica was proud to be a part of that, but she knew she was still a pariah on the team.