by Jamie Begley
“And that surprises you? You knew Friday night when she left with them what she was facing. I didn’t see you running to her defense then.”
Cash picked up a chair and threw it against the wall.
“Sit down!”
Cash forced himself to take a seat.
“How do you want to handle this?” Shade, as always, was a calm bastard.
“I’m going to find her, of course,” Cash stated angrily.
“I’m not the enemy, brother.”
Cash stood to his feet. “I know,” he said running a hand through his hair. “I’m a fucking idiot.”
“Piece of advice. Take it or leave it, but I’m going to give it anyway. Figure out why you want to find her before you go looking.”
He nodded then left Shade’s office, going to the clubhouse and heading upstairs to his bedroom. Taking off his clothes, he took a shower, dressed in fresh clothes then grabbed his bike keys. Once he was back outside and on his bike, he began his search.
It was two in the morning before he returned to his room, no farther along than he had been before he left.
* * *
Cash searched for a week before he had to admit to himself he wasn’t going to find her. She hadn’t made any contact with any of her friends or the few clients he knew of in Kentucky. Furthermore, he’d found out from Knox she hadn’t been in touch with her family or clients from out of state.
On the way back to the clubhouse from Lexington, he had a faint hope she would go to Lily’s old boyfriend, Charles, for a place to work, but it was another dead end.
He was about to pass Rosie’s when he saw a familiar truck parked outside. Quickly turning into the lot, he parked his bike.
The inside was busy as Cash went to the bar, ordering himself a beer. He searched through the room, looking for a particular face. Finding him at the back of the bar at a table to himself, Cash walked across the floor and took a seat.
Tate glanced up from his drink. “Get the fuck away from me.”
“We can talk in here or outside, but we are going to talk.”
Tate began to rise from the table.
Cash leaned back in his chair. “You having any luck finding Rachel?” Cash already knew the answer; his haggard face said it all.
Tate sat back down “No, if you know—”
“I don’t,” Cash cut him off; the last thing he wanted to do was raise his hopes when he didn’t have any leads.
“Then we have nothing to say.” Again, Tate started to get up from the table.
“We can both keep running around, trying to find her and not coming up with crap, or we can work together to bring her home.”
“It’s because of you she ran off.”
“Was it me or something you said after you dumb-fucks left the party?”
Tate remained silent.
“We all fucked up,” Cash admitted. “We can work together or never see her again, which do you want?”
“I want you to stay away from my sister, but I also want to find her, and if it takes your help, then I’ll take it. You’re the best tracker in the state,” Tate gave him the reluctant compliment.
“Where have you searched so far?”
“Everywhere we can think off. Holly has called all her clients in and out of state. We’ve talked to all her friends, who weren't many—Lily and Willa were basically it. Dustin is watching her bank and credit cards, and they haven’t been touched.”
How was she surviving without money? Cash had hoped for another avenue to pursue with Tate’s help, but he had even less than Cash.
“Any ideas?”
“No.” Cash took a drink of his beer. “Email me the client list. I’ll go back over it again.”
Tate hesitated then nodded.
“If I find anything, I’ll let you know.” He stood up.
“Cash, when I find my sister, I plan to settle my score with you.”
Cash’s lips quirked. “I’m surprised you haven’t been knocking down my door already.”
“Right now, Rachel is more important, and I can’t find her when I’m locked up in jail for killing you,” Tate warned.
“I deserve an ass-whipping for opening my big mouth at that party, but anything else is between Rachel and me.”
“There is nothing and won’t ever be anything between you and my sister. I had to watch your father sniff around my mother my whole life, and I’m not going to repeat it with you and my sister.
“I saw how she watched you when she thought no one was looking. Every time your dad would come visiting and bring you, she would sneak and look out the window. I used to tan her hide after they died to get her to quit sneaking off; searching the mountains because she was convinced you were hiding out there. She cried for three days when she found out you fucked her best friend from high school, and she never talked to her again.
“If you want to help find Rachel to alleviate your conscience, you go right ahead. I’d bargain with the devil to get Rachel back, but don’t think I’m going to let her become another one of your whores.”
Cash jerked Tate up from the table. “Don’t ever use the word ‘whore’ and her name in the same sentence again.” Cash had never wanted to hit someone so badly in his entire life.
Choosing to shrug it off, he threw Tate back down onto his chair.
“Send me that list.” He reached into his jean pocket, pulling out a card and throwing it down on the table. “My email is on the card.”
He slammed out of the bar, his boots crunching on the gravel as he got on his bike, pulling out of the parking lot.
Whenever he had been around Rachel, she had never shown by even a blink of her eye that she was interested in him, while he had basically ignored her existence and fucked his way through the town of women. Regret filled him at the wasted opportunity to get to know the woman he was beginning to learn had been a hidden pearl in their town, from not only Lily’s words to Shade, but the other people he had talked to. She had slipped beneath his notice, and now he might not be given a chance to make amends and learn more about the special woman he had fought so hard being attracted to.
He sped his bike home, wanting to get a few hours’ sleep before he tackled the list of clients Tate would be sending. He turned the corner at the same time another car was coming from the opposite side of the road. As the car took the curve, Cash had only a moment to realize it was going to hit him.
Trying to get over as much as possible without hitting the gravel on the side of the road, he gunned his motor, attempting to gain enough speed so the car would miss him. He almost made it.
The car hit his back wheel, spinning his bike out. Agony crashed through his body as he hit the pavement, then numbness took over. He didn’t feel his spine twist or see the mangled bike that lay only a few feet away. He tried to turn his head when he heard yells, but he could only lie helplessly, staring at the dark sky above.
Chapter 11
Rachel’s hand gripped the bottom rail of the hospital bed as she swallowed hard, trying to catch her breath at the sight of the mangled man lying unconscious.
“Rachel?” She turned at the soft voice from the doorway. “Time’s up.”
Rachel walked to the doorway. “Thanks for sneaking me in, Tara.”
“Everyone is worried about you. You should call your brothers.” Her sympathetic voice didn’t stir any of Rachel’s emotions.
“I don’t want to see them; I don’t want to see anyone. You promised you wouldn’t say anything. You owe me for your little brother. I just wanted to see him.”
Tara winced at her words. “Rachel, I appreciate all your help with Toby—it was worth more than sneaking you into a hospital room for five minutes—but I’m concerned about you.”
“Don’t be.” Rachel started to reach out to touch her but pulled her hand back before making contact. “I better go.”
“If you give me your number, I’ll call you if there is a change.”
Rachel told her the number of
her new phone with a request. “Please, don’t give it to anyone.”
“I won’t. I’ll only call if there’s a change,” Tara promised.
Rachel took a final look at Cash hooked to the machines. She had attempted to help him, but his injuries were worse than any she had ever dealt with before.
“I better go. His friends will be showing up for the regular visiting hours.”
“You can go back out the way you came in—through the employees’ entrance.”
“Thanks, Tara.”
She left unobtrusively. The ICU was small and Tara was the only one on duty; the other nurse was on her thirty-minute break.
Rachel went directly to her car. Before she left Treepoint, she had another stop to make.
Driving aimlessly around town, she finally turned to head up the mountain as the sun rose in the sky. It was just starting to get cold in the mornings, thus she flipped on the heat as she drove over the mountain. Her hands tightened on the cold steering wheel when she passed where Cash had wrecked his bike.
She drove on for another three miles before turning into a private drive. Parking her car, she stepped out, getting her jacket out of the back seat and the wrapped flowers. She made the trek up the path that was kept cleared for those visiting the private cemetery.
The small graveyard held Cash’s family that had been born and died in the county since the town had been formed. She passed Knox’s first wife’s grave and paused long enough to say a small prayer for the young woman who had died overseas. Taking one of the flowers out of her mother’s bundle, she lay it down on Sunshine’s before moving on to her parents’ graves.
“Hi, Mom and Dad.” Rachel laid the flowers down on her mother’s grave. She stood, looking down at the grass-covered mounds, missing her parents as much as when they had been buried. She stood there a while, knowing it would be some time before she came back.
She wanted her mother so much. She could still remember the smell of her perfume, how soft her hair was, and the feel of her arms holding her close. She hadn’t been held since the day her mom had died.
Saying a prayer, she turned from her grave and spotted Cash’s father’s grave on the opposite side of her mother’s. They had been best friends until their deaths. Joe Adams had been over at their house constantly, sometimes even bringing Cash. It was only when she had gotten older and had accidently heard her brothers talking that she had discovered Joe had been in love with her mother.
The path was steep, so going down she had to watch her feet to keep from falling. When she got to the bottom of the hill, she looked up and came to a stop.
“Hi, Rachel.”
“Shade.” He was leaning against the door of her car with his arms folded across his chest. “What are you doing out here?”
He gave her a mocking smile. “Knox told me you used to come here every weekend. I knew, eventually, you would come by for a visit, so I had the place watched. Old habits die hard.”
“Evidently. What do you want?” Rachel knew he wouldn’t let her leave until he told her what he wanted.
“I want you to fix Cash.” Shade’s determined face showed he was serious.
Her mouth dropped open. “I’m not capable of fixing him, Shade. I don’t have super powers.” She brushed a tendril of hair away from her cheek. “Besides, I already tried.”
“Then try again.”
“It’s not that simple.” Rachel didn’t know how to explain what she did; she never could. To her, it was simply a part of her, like breathing or blinking. It had always been there when she needed it, but fixing Cash would take more power than she possessed.
“You’re just going to leave him lying in that bed without trying?”
“I tried! What don’t you understand?”
Shade straightened away from the car. “Rachel, do you feel any better since you left town?”
“No,” she admitted.
“Then, if you’re going to feel like shit, why not stay in town near Cash? Even if you can help him deal with the pain, then wouldn’t it be worth it?”
“I don’t owe Cash any favors,” she responded stubbornly.
“Don’t act like you don’t care or you wouldn’t have come back to town. No one says you have to move back into your brothers’ house.”
“Where would I stay?”
“You could stay with Cash’s grandmother. No one goes near that old bitch’s house.”
A slight smile touched her lips. “She’s not that bad.”
“Yes, she is. Well?”
“All right.” Rachel caved in to doing what she wanted to do anyway. Shade had merely made it easier to accept.
“Good. She’s expecting you.” Rachel rolled her eyes; she hadn’t stood a chance against Shade. “I owe you, Rachel.”
“That’s the same thing you said when you asked me to go to work in the church store to help Lily. I would have helped Lily regardless, but it would have been nice if you would have broken up that fight before Cash opened his big mouth.”
Shade climbed on his bike, turning on the motor. “I paid you back when I helped Viper hold Cash back when Tate dragged you away. If he had gotten near Tate, he would have killed him. Welcome back, Rachel.”
Rachel watched as he drove away.
“Asshole.”
* * *
Rachel sat curled on the chair beside Cash’s bed, twisting her hands. The pallor of his normally tanned skin was white, and he was covered in so many abrasions that more of his skin had marks than didn’t. He had received spinal and head injuries, but the coma he was in was medically-induced. Rachel was relieved he wasn’t experiencing any pain.
When one of The Last Riders came to visit, she would go into the waiting room until they left. She didn’t speak to any of his visitors, pretending to read magazines to avoid conversations of why she was there. Cash had no family other than his grandmother, and she had been by several times to visit him in the hospital.
Rachel had moved in with her temporarily. She spent most of her time at the hospital, though, only going to Mag’s cabin when she needed to sleep or shower.
Rachel had met her several times before her stroke, and her personality hadn’t dimmed since her illness. If anything, she had become even more gregarious.
As the nurse came in to check Cash’s machines, Rachel ignored her curious looks, going to stare out the window as his bandages were changed.
After she left, Rachel returned to sitting by the bed. Even unconscious, his virility and masculinity managed to capture you. Her hand reached out to touch his cheek, but hearing a movement at the door, she snatched her hand back to her side.
Dean stood in the doorway.
Rachel looked away, unable to meet his eyes. Stepping away from the bed again, she started to leave the room.
“Stay.”
She stopped mid-flight and gave a sharp nod, going to the window.
Rachel heard Dean take a seat by Cash’s bed, taking Cash’s hand in his own. Rachel watched as Dean spent the next ten minutes talking to Cash as if he could hear what he was saying. It brought a lump to her throat to see a glimpse of the man who had been her pastor for years and whose guidance she had always respected.
Dean bent his head, saying a brief prayer before rising to his feet and coming to stand next to her at the window.
“The nurse tells me there hasn’t been any change.”
“No.”
“Rachel, I may not be your pastor anymore, but I would like to think we’re still friends. I’m always here for you to talk to.”
“I don’t need to talk, and if I did, it wouldn’t be with someone who is friends with him.” Rachel gave him her back.
“If you’re so angry at him, why are you here?”
“I don’t know.” She shrugged. “Shade thinks I may be able to help him.”
“Can you?” Dean leaned casually against the window, blocking her view and forcing her to look him in the eye.
“No. My gift isn’t like that. I do
n’t heal; I can’t fix what’s broken,” Rachel tried to explain. She blew out a breath of air. “I’m more of an emotional empath. I can give off warmth and sense things that are out of place. I can transfer my feelings to others, but I am not a healer.”
“I don’t think Lily would agree with you.”
“I didn’t heal Lily; Shade did.” Rachel believed in giving credit where it was due. Without Shade giving Lily a sense of being protected, she would never have healed or been able to face her demons.
“I see. Have you tried?”
Rachel nodded. “I told you, it’s useless. Everyone thinks I’m not helping him because I’m mad at him, though.”
“I’m not saying Cash doesn’t deserve your anger, merely that your gift comes from love, and hate always stands in the way of love.” When Rachel rolled her eyes at his trite words, Dean laughed. “I know it sounds idealistic, but I believe it. Just because I’m no longer a minister, it doesn’t mean I don’t have faith.”
She knew he might be right. Whenever she had felt the warmth in her hands, it had come when she was thinking of how much she wanted to help the person and cared for their happiness.
“I’m not capable of helping him.”
“I get pretty mad at Cash sometimes. I wasn’t at the party, and he pissed me off.”
Rachel blushed.
“The hardest battle I fought as a minister was everyone’s view of sex. I don’t believe because a woman enjoys her sexuality that makes her a whore. Small towns tend to be judgmental.”
“Yes, they do,” Rachel agreed.
“Rachel, I don’t doubt you’re hurt, angry, and embarrassed to have something that was special to you thrown out at a party to humiliate your brothers. You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
Rachel looked quickly over her shoulder at Cash, as if he could hear them while in a coma. “I was. I don’t even like him now, though,” she confessed.
Dean nodded. “If it’s any consolation, he felt terrible about what happened. He was trying to find you when he wrecked.”
Rachel closed her eyes tightly, not wanting to feel any emotion toward Cash.