by Tina Maurine
25
I can’t really recall exactly how the rest of the night (or rather early morning) went. I slammed down a few stiff drinks and started to feel numb, like I was ready to party and chill out. My heart wasn’t broken, but it was pretty fucking tired, so I let it rest. I kept my distance from Dane. A good roll in the hay would’ve distracted me further, but wouldn’t have solved anything, just given me more shit to deal with.
At some point in the early morning, I went looking for Dirk, Sammie, Kari and Ari. I found Sammie & Dirk making out, like always; looked everywhere for Kari and finally found her in Trigg’s room on the house phone talking to Dax. Finally, I liberated Ari from the unscrupulous, albeit drunkenly desired attentions of a handful of Icelandic girls.
“Hey, there you are, baby girl!” Ari said, happy to see me. He stood up and toasted me, sloshing a good wave of platinum label liquor over the side of his glass. “Here’s to your freedom and our adventure, which starts in,” he fumbled until he uncovered his watch. “Holy Crap, it’s 0618…so that means we leave in, shit—less than forty-eight hours! Well, here’s to our adventure in Turkey that begins in T-47 hours.”
As the party wound down, I held onto Ari. We made our way toward the door. I hollered at Sammie, as she was STILL saying goodbye to Trigg. I waved to him and Ketts.
Dane met me at the door, and I went in for the casual, chummy ‘goodbye’ hug and Euro kisses. Dane had something else in mind, as he pulled me in to an aggressive, tight and demanding hug. I know it couldn’t have been from me, but there was an active presence in the front of his jeans that I swear gave me a tiny shudder somewhere deep inside my core.
“Þú veist, Tessa mín, myndi ég elska að sjá þig aftur. Bráðum.”
“I love it when you talk to me in Icelandic, even if I have no clue what you‘re saying.”
“I’ll give you one fucking guess it’s meaning,” Noah snidely remarked as he intentionally bumped into us.
“‘Ey, Tessa, call off ‘ye guard dog ‘ey?”
Noah angrily rounded on Dane, “Come on, FUCKER… you have something to say to me? Do ya?”
I gave Noah a disgusted warning look as I intentionally positioned myself between them. Dane reached out and pulled me back into him. Yup. His caged snake was ready to escape and make its new home between my legs. I smiled at the lewdness of my thought. Noah’s proximity made it doubly inappropriate, but still humorous. Dane took it as an invitation of sorts and bent his head down so his lips rested on my neck right below my ear. I looked up at him, but he was glaring past me directly at Noah.
Are you fucking kidding me? He’s instigating a fight with Noah!
“Just so ‘ye know, ‘ey had said that I’d love to see ‘ye again. Soon.” His whiskey-laden invitation, whispered in my ear, wasn’t one that I was seriously considering; but right at that moment, everything about Dane sent an adrenaline spike through my body, drawing my nipples taut.
“But, what I’d really like is if ‘ye stayed da night with me. Ég myndi elska að grafa mig í fullkomnu litlu kisa þinn aftur. If ‘ye remember, we promised we would. ‘Ey have waited long enough, sæta mín.”
He softly whispered his reminder that doubled as an invitation in my ear. I gave his Popeye-like bicep a squeeze. “It’s not gonna happen tonight, hoss.”
“Yeah, or any other… fucker,” I heard Noah mutter under his breath behind my back. I glanced over my shoulder and looked back at Dane. Giving him a small kiss on his cheek, I said, “I’ll keep that in mind,” and winked at him as my entourage left his party.
We walked back with the sun glaring in our eyes, showed our IDs to the security at the front gate and walked through… all of us. Yup, even Noah, who brought up the rear.
“Hey, Tessa, you’ll keep what in mind?”
I turned and looked at my best guy buddy. A drunken, although cute version of his usual self, all untucked and looking thoroughly ridden hard, even though he hadn’t been.
“What was that, Ari?”
He smiled one of his million-dollar smiles. “Baby girl, you told Dane you’d keep that in mind. Keep what?” He swayed back and forth. “Is he throwing another party? Did you get another invite?”
I smiled at the funniness of the situation. “Yeah, something like that.” I didn’t explain any further. I heard Noah snort behind me and growl something under his breath.
Fucking whatever dude!
It was such an incredibly beautiful morning; cold as fuck, but the wind wasn’t blowing. We’d all been walking in silence for the past ten minutes or so of a forty minute walk that it took to get back to the BEQ, nursing the beginning stages of our hangovers.
“Hey, beautiful.” Noah had shouldered up beside me, surprising me with his husky tenor. I looked up at him and his face modeled that of a man ashamed for the way that he’d behaved.
“Hey,” I said flatly, still angry with him over the ridiculous way he’d behaved at the party—I knew when he decided to go that it was a bad idea.
“You know, I’m… I’m sorry. It’s just that…”
I put my hand up to stop him. Glancing around, I noticed Dirk and Ari had grouped together in the back, bullshitting and razzing Sammie and Kari about something. Sammie and Kari looked like a scene out of Night of the Living Dead.
Keeping my voice down as I didn’t want to really have this conversation in front of everyone else, I whispered, “You know, Noah, I just don’t know what to make of you. You’re acting all jealous over a guy I slept with months before you, and on the same day you alluded to WHEN you get back with Vi. I mean, how am I supposed to take that?” My voice quivered from pent up emotions: frustration, confusion, hurt, love… the whole kit and caboodle. FUCK! This is making my head ache.
“I know.” He hung his head. “I don’t know why I care about Dane either. Just the thought of his greasy hands on you, and him and you… FUCK!” He grappled for control, running both hands abrasively over his face, and then one through his unruly locks. He took a deep breath, “Even though a piece of me is torn and wants to stay; you know I have to go.”
I nodded and trudged forward, not sure if my traitorous eyes or the glare off the wet pavement nearly blinded me. Renegade tears rolled down my cheeks. At least the heat from the sun feels marvelous, I thought, swiping at my cheeks angrily. And he’s just as fucked up as I am. What a pair. No wonder we just stay stuck in this stupid place.
He sighed heavily. “Beautiful.” He stopped, turning and holding my shoulders so I faced him. “You and I… there’s just something I can’t explain, and it unnerves me, upends me. Fuck, Tessa, look at what you do to me. I can’t lose you no matter what happens.”
“Well, you should’ve thought of that probability long before now…” My eyes refused to meet his, hurt and angry. I was over the drama and still found myself softening at his confession. Why can’t he just see what I see? Why’s he think Vi’s still the one for him? Fuck!
I looked up, and his dark sapphire eyes drew me into their depths—they always did. “I just can’t find it in me to play second-fiddle. I want to be with someone who wants me…”
“But I DO!”
“…and knows it, Noah. Someone who choses me above anyone else.” I broke free from his slight hold and looked to Sammie, who had nearly caught up.
“Hey Sam,” I called out buoyantly, “wanna head to the Café Barista for a strong cup of joe?”
She looked from me to the guys and jogged the few steps to catch up to me. “You bet I do!” Smiling, she wrapped her arms around my shoulders. “Come on, hooka, let’s ditch these losers,” she looked pointedly at Noah, “and get the best damn cup of coffee you’ve ever had. You deserve it after last night.” She hooked her arm in mine, and we started walking, elbows linked, hands buried in our pockets, in the direction of the base coffee shop.
“Forgive me?” Noah called after me, his voice unhinged.
I shouted back without looking, “I always fucking DO,” and shook my head.
We made it up the flights of stairs to our room with haste; shivering in the frigid halls. All I wanted to do was climb in bed and cocoon myself in my covers. We let ourselves in—but to our chagrin, our beds weren’t empty. Dirk lay in Sammie’s bed. Sammie, Sammie, Sammie… I shook my head and mentally clucked my tongue at her. She shed her jacket, kicked off her boots and flopped onto the bed beside him, and within a minute, her breathing grew deep and even.
Undressing down to my panties and camisole, I climbed into bed. Noah nuzzled up next to me in just his boxer briefs. He stirred in his sleep and said in a tortured, sleepy, diminutive voice, “Mama, please forgive me? I didn’t mean to let her get stolen away.” His voice changed, and he now spoke in more of a hushed whimper. “Please, Mama NO. Don’t do that. Mama, please don’t do that. Dad will come home—you’ll see. Please forgive me, Mama? Please?”
I shook Noah awake and his striking blue eyes opened just long enough for him to pull me into him tightly and ask me, “Should I go?”
Torn, I lay silently waging a war within myself; my carnal desires outweighing every logical argument I came up with. “No. I guess I’m kind of glad you’re here,” I whispered softly, not wanting to awaken Dirk.
He shifted again, stirring himself awake. “Tessa?”
“Yes, Noah?”
“I leave in a few hours.”
“I know.”
“I just wanted to say goodbye to you one last time. I really hope you’re okay with me being here. It’s just, I needed…”
I smiled at his groggy admission and interrupted him. “Yeah. You know, I truly felt the need to say a final goodbye to you too, one that wasn’t so… angry.” I drew his arms tightly around me and snuggled more closely into his body. His package was not nearly as asleep as the rest of him; it met me with stout resistance. An instant fire ignited in my belly, a deep burning ache that throbbed for more of him. As tired as I was, I couldn’t help myself and ground my ass into his hungry, restless cock.
“Tessa…?” The question fell from Noah’s mouth quietly and not without a recognizable tone of shock.
I kind of purred, my contentment bubbling up in a languid kind of hum. “Mmm Hmm?”
“Let me make love to you. I think about you every night when I ‘m alone with my thoughts, and I pray that if I get some closure, you’ll stop haunting me.”
His plea moved me. My soul stirred, and my body responded by deepening the already familiar ache that threatened to consume me. When I was with him, everything else, everyone else faded into the scenery. My steadfast resolve eroded to nothingness; no trace left for me to dispute over.
I heard Dirk say mutter something in a sleepy voice, and Sammie responded with, “Me too.”
Noah and I stilled, only our heavy, passion-laden breaths audible.
“My head,” he muttered. “Need air.”
“Let’s go for a walk then,” she replied softly. I heard Sammie and Dirk rise from the bed.
Not shockingly, her keys jingled. Soft footsteps swished across the floor, and the door clicked quietly in the jamb.
Noah’s large, rough hands resumed their mission-driven exploration over my hips, flirting across my flat abdomen, and up past my ribs to my full breasts, which were already heavy with desire.
“If you don’t stop me, I’m going to make love to you.” His lips brushed my neck as he breathily expressed his desire against the sensitive spot below my ear. His hands continued their demanding exploration across my breasts, finding my already taut nipples before he rolled and pinched them. I sucked in a sharp breath. His other hand continued its assault on my senses as it made its way south. He slid its rough strength into my barely-there panties, his middle finger sliding through my moist valley repeatedly before it entered me. His thumb negotiated circles around my most sensitive bud.
Oh, my fucking God. I don’t want him to make love to me, I want him to fuck me now. Hard.
My brain and body were no longer warring against each other. It was as though two opposing forces had joined the same mission, and now both fought to get me to an explosive orgasm.
The intense pleasure Noah aroused in me should’ve been illegal. I can’t even explain how responsive my nerves were; even the air circulating by the fan from across the room tickled my skin and made my hairs stand on edge. Noah’s onslaught on my breast and clitoris as he drilled me with two fingers made breathing nearly impossible.
One second, I lay writhing on my side against Noah’s rigidity. One well executed maneuver later, he’d roughly flipped me onto my back and was grinding his impressive cock between my eager thighs.
“Oh my God, Tessa. You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted to have you underneath me, writhing for me… and I can fucking tell you this much,” he growled in a husky, passion-laden voice, “this time I’m going to give you more than a goddamn feel.”
His mouth melded with mine… branding me. Claiming me. Our lips danced to our own beat with a fierceness that had only been matched that morning in the tour bus. His tongue teased and sparred with mine, our lips merging perfectly. I couldn’t get enough of Noah. My hands in his thick hair pulled him to me, before sliding onto his powerful back, feeling his muscles bunch and flex as he moved over me. The assault he was orchestrating forced my hand, and I couldn’t keep my exploration from heading to his sculpted ass. Grabbing his hips, I pulled his huge fucking dick toward me.
“Noah…”
“Mmm hmm.”
“Noah, I want you to take me, fucking take me the way I want to take you.”
Noah paused, pulling his mouth away from my neck. “Oh? And, my sweet Tessa,” his mouth went down to my nipples and I drew in a sharp breath of air, “exactly how would that be?” He lifted his head and raised an eyebrow at me as the corner of his mouth turned up in a smartass smirk. Even then, the absence of his lips on my skin left a vacancy in my soul.
“This is our one and only night together, and I am not looking for sweet love.” My voice dropped as I suddenly became self-conscious at how wanton I sounded.
“So, let me get this straight. You don’t want me to make love to you? You want me to fuck you. HARD.” His voice cracked as he said the latter.
I couldn’t find my voice, so I nodded as I arched my back, sending my most private parts aggressively into his rigid and twitching cock. He responded by throwing my calves up over his ass. He drilled against my sheathed apex, grinding hard against me before nestling his cock quietly on my dripping sex.
“See, I knew it!” He growled his victory huskily into my ear. “I knew you’d be up for the kink, the lewd fucking lascivious shit I’m into. You don’t know what you’ve asked for. I’m going to fuck you until I have to leave, and, you will come so hard you won’t be able to walk, well into next week. You won’t be able to think of anyone but me, the entire time I’m gone.”
My eyes widened just before his mouth came down on mine in another soul wrenching kiss that curled my toes. Noah grabbed the already raised hem of my camisole and rolled it into a makeshift blindfold as he pulled it up over my eyes. He reached down and, with a swift tug, tore my sheer panties off. My heart leapt into my throat, pounding like a freight train.
“God, Tessa, these are so fucking wet. I cannot get enough of you. I love the way you smell.” He positioned a hard thigh between my legs and slid the other farther up the bed…I presume so he could balance, as the next thing he did was tie my hands together with my barely-there panties.
“You’re so beautiful, Tessa; painfully, sinfully so. Do you have any idea the depth of my desire for you? How long I have ached to feel your hot, wet pussy around my cock? You have no idea what this means to me, or, since I’ve met you, how many nights I’ve lain awake in bed, needing to make you mine. Imagining how to make this happen; what I’d do to you. How you’d look tied up; how sweet your begging would sound; the readiness of your sex; how you’d taste. Jeezus, Tessa! What have you done to me? Will I ever be able to get over you?” His voice faltered, and was alre
ady so soft, I strained to hear him. It seemed as if he was confessing these things to himself; I wasn’t so sure they were meant for me to hear. They made him sound so vulnerable, so goddamn sexy and… breakable.
I want to break you like you’ve broken me…
I felt his weight shift, and then his mouth arrived at my already over sensitized sex, merely a breath’s distance away from the source of my raging need. It drove me crazier than his one hand teasing my nipples. His other hand handled my hip firmly, manipulating it in such a way that his desire surged through even the tips of his fingers.
His tongue plundered my most sensitive spot, which had already swelled and begun aching with desire. My hands clenched and fisted in their bonds, and my head tossed as I felt the momentum building toward my orgasm. He continued his assault as his ravenous tongue lashed and flicked my clit, all while two fingers drove into me, teasing my g-spot. I felt the waves cresting, and right when I felt I would surely die from the intensity, Noah rammed his enraged cock full tilt into me. His mouth covered mine to muffle the orgiastic cry that was ripped from deep within me. My salty juices provided a sweet contrast that co-mingled on our lips.
Noah ripped the blindfold off me and double banded my wrists.
“I need to see you, Tessa. I need to see your eyes when I come.” His voice snarled, harsh with restraint, and his engorged cock twitched at that moment, causing my back to arch from its sheer depth.
“You feel so good. Oh my God, Noah. I just had…” I struggled for the breath to express myself. “I had NO IDEA it would be like this with you.”
“I did. I knew it from the moment our souls collided and our bodies entwined together so perfectly. I knew you would do this to me.”
Vulnerable from sharing, he began to circle his hips, withdrawing and plunging deeply into me, as though he needed me to experience for myself how incredible he knew it would be. I countered each of his thrusts, time and time again.
Noah was truly beautiful to behold, his brow furled in concentration and restraint, his eyes hooded with passion, his lips parted, raking in harsh, shallow breaths. Every time he slowly and with antagonizing, deliberate measure withdrew to his turgid head, and then crammed his rigid, torrid length root-deep into me, I broke even further. I loved how he rutted with harsh ferocity, then withdrew with leisurely ease. His eyes never once left mine. Never closed. His gaze remained married to mine, always seeking, imploring, and demanding my truths. Our orgasms both built at an excruciatingly deliberate pace; Noah’s experience and unfathomable restraint delayed our simultaneous climax.