by Tia Siren
Harper sighed heavily and turned to face me. Her face was drained of color, and it looked like she hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep the night before. Still, she was as beautiful as ever. She almost reminded me of a porcelain doll just staring up at me. Her eyes were the things that got me the most. They were so full of emotion yet as gentle as they’d ever been. I knew just looking at her that there was not a single evil bone in her body. Harper was as good as they came.
“Why the sudden change in personality?” she asked. “Last night you were talking down about everyone in the town, and now you want to be a part of the festivities? Didn’t you leave the rodeo behind when you moved to New York to become a ‘better’ person?” She used quotations around the word better, and it increased the intensity of the sting in her words.
“I may have moved far away from this place, but my love for the rodeo never changed. One of the main things I missed in this town was the Friday night rodeos and the way the whole town got together. There aren’t things like that in the city. There’s no sense of community,” I said.
“You really miss the rodeos?” she asked me suspiciously. Her eyes looked over my face like they were searching for a sign of false play.
I nodded. “The only bulls I’ve seen in the past few years have been mechanical.”
With great hesitation, Harper thought over what she was going to say and how she was going to say it. I watched her with eager eyes, hoping she said yes so that I could give her a good time and show her that things were the same. I was still the same Lincoln, but I was a much better version because no one could hold any power or status over me. After a while, Harper sighed out heavily and nodded.
“Fine. I’ll go to the rodeo with you on one condition,” she said with crossed arms.
“Anything,” I responded.
“You have to wear normal clothes. I’m tired of seeing you waltz around here wearing clothes that cost more than my car,” she said. “No city slicker clothes, no suits, and nothing from a company with a name I can’t pronounce. You have to dress the part if you’re going to a rodeo.”
I was so happy to hear her agree to go to the rodeo with me that her condition didn’t bother me one bit. I nodded happily. “Fine. I’ll find some normal clothes and wear them out tonight.”
“All right. I’ll be ready by five,” she said before turning her back to me and going back to brushing Lady.
I couldn’t keep myself from smiling as I thought about the approaching night. For once we were going to hang out like old friends. I was determined to have a good time and show Harper that we could have a good time together.
Chapter Ten
Harper
I was surprised, to put things lightly, when Lincoln walked out of his room. I had expected him to be dressed up to the nines like he usually was, but he walked out looking like the old him. He wore a green, black, and white flannel tucked into a pair of dark-washed jeans. His belt buckle was the one I had given him on our one-year anniversary: a silver buckle with copper cowboy boots. His dark hair was slicked back with just a single curl escaping and resting on his forehead. He was like the cowboy Clark Kent, and my heart skipped a beat or two when my eyes landed on him.
At once, I felt extremely underdressed. I wore my long hair in a ponytail, and I’d paired a black, V-neck, long-sleeved shirt with a pair of my favorite jeans, as the rodeo was a place where people could be comfortable while having a good time.
“Are you ready?” Lincoln asked me.
I nodded my head slowly, shifting my old brown purse higher on my shoulder. “Are we going to take my car or yours?”
“We can take mine,” he said. “I’m sure you’ll want to unwind and have a beer or two.”
He was right. I was stressed out, and the thought of cheering loudly and drinking a few beers sounded like heaven. We walked out and locked up the house before heading out. It was the first time I had seen Lincoln’s truck up close and personal. It was big, almost as big as Lincoln’s ego, and it was a beautiful shade of candy-apple red. It was the dream truck he had talked about when we were younger. A sense of pride as well as resentment filled me. Those two emotions haunted me fairly often with Lincoln in my life.
Lincoln walked ahead of me and opened the door. I thanked him kindly before getting in and buckling up. Based on the smell, it was a rental.
“Who’s going to be riding tonight?” Lincoln asked once we were headed toward the local stadium.
“You remember Gareth Knight?” I asked.
“You mean Peter’s older brother?”
I was surprised he remembered the names, let alone the relations, of the people in our town. I simply nodded. My desire to have a conversation with him died, but I listened to him as he talked about how he hadn’t seen a rodeo in a while. I didn’t know if it was me being hopeful, but he seemed genuinely excited to go back to the rodeo. He talked about it nonstop, and I was brought back to when we’d been younger, to how excited he had been the first time we’d gone together.
The rodeo was just like I remembered. The last time I’d gone to one, I had been with both of my parents. It was a bittersweet feeling, but I was finally able to think about it without wanting to cry. In my heart, I would always miss them, but I was starting to heal and move on with my life. Lincoln and I stood tall in the stands along with everyone else. We watched the little kids play in the petting zoo before the main event started, and I noticed a few familiar faces with them. Some of my high school classmates were already parents, and they were enjoying their time with their families. I, on the other hand, was single and childless with a struggling business.
“Are you all right?” Lincoln asked, pulling me from my thoughts.
I nodded. “It’s weird seeing old friends of mine with their husbands and children.”
Lincoln must have understood my thought process, because he didn’t say anything further. Instead, we stood in silence beside one another until the main event started. Then we cheered like our lives depended on it. It didn’t matter if the cowboy was tossed off the bulls or if he stayed on for the long haul. Regardless, we cheered and had a great old time. For the first time, I felt like things were returning to how they’d been when we had been children. We even snuck off to the concession stand to bicker and babble about who we thought had rode best without having to scream over the crowd. The few hours we spent there felt like they had only been minutes, and I was hesitant to head back home.
“Do you still want to go to the diner for dinner?” Lincoln asked me as we walked side by side to his truck.
I thought about it for a moment and then nodded. “Having one of their burgers sounds absolutely fantastic right now.”
“Did you just use the word fantastic?” Lincoln asked me with a wide, teasing smirk on his lips.
“I sure as hell did,” I retorted, “and it feels fantastic.”
We both laughed and continued on our way to the truck. We spoke about the rodeo and how nice it had been to see the new riders on our way to the diner. The diner was the typical spot for everyone coming back from the rodeo, so it was extremely busy. There were mainly families, so Lincoln and I were seated quickly. We wasted no time jumping on the menus, because, like me, Lincoln had skipped breakfast that morning. As Lincoln looked over his, I watched him to see if he had an ounce of judgement in his eyes. I was happy, and surprised, to see that he just looked like the hungry boy I had gone to the diner with for our dates. The only differences were that the man before me didn’t have to work extra hours and save up money and that we weren’t actually on a date.
“Do you know what you want, or are you too busy checking me out to decide?” Lincoln teased from behind his menu. He looked up and flashed me a dazzling smile.
“Please, don’t flatter yourself. I always know what I want when I come here,” I told him, looking away at the crowd waiting to be seated.
“Then do share,” he said. “I want to see just how much Harper Callahan has changed over the years.”
I looked back over at him and raised an eyebrow. “I haven’t changed much, Lincoln. I’m still the same me that orders the deluxe burger with a side of tater tots. I need to be asking you that question, don’t I?”
“I’m still the Lincoln Heatherton that likes his chicken-fried steak with a side of mashed potatoes,” he said, his eyes never leaving mine.
A part of me wanted to tell him that was good to know, but I knew a conversation would spark out of that. Instead, I flashed him a soft smile and nodded. When the waiter came over, we ordered, and then the table fell silent. We both wanted to talk, but we didn’t have a single clue as to what to talk about. So much had changed, and so many thoughts and emotions were being avoided by both of us. Instead of saying anything, I just looked down at the napkin in front of me and started tracing the designs.
“You know, I had to work my ass off to take you on dates when we were younger,” Lincoln muttered softly, pulling me from my thoughts. “I would give my mom some money to help pay for bills, and, once that was covered, I would work extra hours to make sure I could still take you out after every rodeo. I wanted so badly to impress you.”
“It meant a lot, but you know I would have been fine with us not eating out at all,” I said. “Just going to the rodeo and talking about it after was enough for me. You knew that.”
“I did, but that didn’t stop me from wanting to impress you,” he admitted. “You did so much for me growing up, whether it was packing an extra lunch for me or standing up for me when no one else did.”
“I thought you said you had no one there to stand up for you,” I shot at him. I was bitter about that comment, because he’d completely written off what I had done for him, and I wanted to know why he would have said such a thing.
Silence befell us once more. I had been certain that the conversation would get dropped, because we had no reason to talk about the past any longer and I didn’t want to talk about the words we had exchanged the night before. Lincoln already knew how I felt about him and what he’d turned into, and I already knew there was no convincing a fool to rethink the ways he was so set within. I went back to tracing the napkin’s details while Lincoln busied himself with whatever task was on his cell phone. I was amazed he even got service where we were; it was always a dead zone for me. I guessed the rich could afford whatever luxuries they desired.
As I waited for my food, I turned my focus on the people waiting. There were so many familiar faces, but no one bothered to talk to me while I was sitting with Lincoln. I figured they thought we were on a date or reconnecting. Still, they were polite and waved or said a quick “hello” before making their way to their table or to the bathroom as they passed. Unlike Lincoln, I had come back to visit my parents while I’d been in college, and I had moved back once my mom’s sickness had gotten worse. Everyone saw me as a local. Everyone remembered how close Lincoln and I had once been, and everyone must have assumed things were going well. The thought amazed me. People on the outside looking in failed to see that I was ready to eat and head home.
“You don’t have to look so miserable,” Lincoln said, chiming up.
I pulled myself from my thoughts and looked over at him. With a cocked brow and a tilted head to the side, I was sure my face wrote out how perplexed I was by his statement.
“You won’t look at me, and you keep tapping your leg under the table,” he said from his place across from me.
I snorted, rolling my eyes at his statement. “Those don’t really mean anything too out there, Lincoln.”
“You always did that when you were uncomfortable,” he said. “When we were in a situation or around people you didn’t like, you would avoid looking at one place and tap your leg. Sometimes your eyebrows would furrow, but that was only if you were getting agitated as well.”
“I don’t think you’re remembering properly. I only tap my leg when I’m bored and waiting for something,” I said.
Lincoln shook his head and sat up. He rested his forearms against the table. With his sleeves shifted up, I got a glimpse at his well-toned and tanned arms. I couldn’t help but think about how amazing they would feel wrapped around my naked body. Quickly, I snapped myself out of my thoughts.
“I might have been gone for a while, but I still know you like the back of my hand,” Lincoln said, his eyes looking into mine intently, as if challenging me to disagree and tell him he was wrong, “You, Harper Callahan, are just as stubborn as ever. I bet your lawyer had to pull every tooth and nail from your body to get you to even give in to leasing your land. I bet he had to fight a little harder just to get you to realize that it was the best thing for you to take up my offer.”
“I’m stubborn. So what? Everyone knows I’m stubborn, Lincoln. My father was a stubborn man, as was my grandfather. It runs in my blood,” I said. He might have thought he knew me, but he was just as good at reading people as I was at reading Japanese. People changed.
“You’re also avoiding looking at me because you don’t want to think about letting your guard down around me. It’s my job to know people and what they want, and I know you want to be comfortable with me again. It’s what I want too,” he said.
“If that’s what you want, then you shouldn’t have left in the first place,” I shot back at him, “and you should have taken your head out of your ass a long time ago. You don’t want anything to do with me, Lincoln. You want everything to do with my property and my family business.”
“Is that what you think I’m staying here for?” he asked.
“It’s the only thing you’d want,” I responded softly.
“What would you do if I said I wanted you?”
A shiver went up my spine. I heard the lust in his voice, but also a genuine desire. It sounded like he meant it in every single way: emotionally, physically, and mentally. He wanted me to be his, and I thought back to the time when I had been his. I thought back to how we had laughed and spoken about everything the world had to offer. We’d spoken about our dreams, and we’d been so nervous to make love that we had put it off a few times before finally getting it right underneath our tree. He wanted me just as I wanted him, and I felt a crack in my wall as my heart leapt out, eager to welcome him back in.
Before I could say anything else, the food was brought out. Neither of us hesitated to begin eating. In fact, we quickly indulged. I felt Lincoln watching me, and I glanced up to see him chewing with an amused look on his face.
“What’s so funny?” I asked him once my food was swallowed.
“You look gorgeous when you eat, but you are one messy eater,” he teased.
I felt a blush warm my cheeks, and I dabbed a napkin over my mouth. “Oh hush, you. No one is a messier eater than you. Have you seen your side of the table?”
“Hey, I have an excuse. I haven’t eaten this kind of food in a long time,” he said. “You’ve been here long enough to enjoy this whenever you wanted.”
“Oh yeah. I’m sure the city life doesn’t spoil you with good food,” I said playfully.
We fell into a comfortable place of flirting back and forth. Once again, I felt like we were teenagers. The chemistry and the laughter that filled the air between us and were electric. The only thing keeping me from holding his hand and gazing into his eyes was the little voice in the back of my head that kept telling me we weren’t together.
Once dinner was gone and the food was paid for, Lincoln and I headed home. The laughter and happiness that had been in the diner with us followed us all the way to my family ranch. We sang to the radio, teased one another for being off key, and there were playful shoves here and there. I forgot all about the night we’d had before and me storming out of the kitchen in the middle of dinner. The only thing I was aware of was how much I was laughing, because it had been awhile since I’d experienced the pleasure of genuine laughter.
We walked inside and decided to continue our conversation over a few beers before bed. We sat beside one another at the kitchen table and talked about everything. I to
ld him stories about what college had been like for me and how I regretted getting a marketing degree because I wasn’t even using it. He, in turn, told me that the city life was unforgiving and there were so many people who got wrapped up in all the wrong scenes with all the wrong people.
“How did you manage to stay on track?” I asked him.
“Honestly? I just couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he said. “Whenever I felt like I was going in the wrong direction, I just thought about what you would say to me.”
“You don’t have to lie and sweet talk me right now,” I said with a roll of my eyes.
“I’m not,” he muttered. “I really thought about you telling me that I was better than the drugs or the partying, and it pushed me to stay away from all of that.”
Based on his tone, I knew he was telling the truth. It was so raw and intimidating that I didn’t know how to react. The only thing I could do was down the rest of my beer and stand up for the night. There were so many emotions dancing between us that I couldn’t make sense of them all.
“I think I should head to bed,” I told him softly.
“I didn’t mean to scare you off,” Lincoln said as he looked up at me. “I just thought you should know that I never forgot about you.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” I whispered, turning to leave.
Instead of letting me go, however, Lincoln caught my hand. He stood up and turned me around to face him. I looked down at the floor to avoid his gaze, but he took one strong hand and cupped my chin, lifting it so that I was looking up at him. We gazed into each other’s eyes, and no words needed to be exchanged. Slowly, he placed his soft lips on mine. For the first time in forever, I shared a kiss with a man that was more than just a kiss. There was enough passion in that single kiss to drive my heart into overdrive. Our mouths moved against one another’s slowly at first, and then the pressure increased. Tasting his lips on mine was like taking a bite out of the juiciest apple. It quickly became passionate once our arms wrapped around the other person’s body. Once we let go of our reservations, the hunger came.