Catch Me A Cowboy
Jacquie Underdown
www.escapepublishing.com.au
Catch Me A Cowboy
Jacquie Underdown
The biggest risks yield the greatest gains—especially in the game of love.
Emily Wolfe, real estate agent to the elite, is tired of being alone. So when she gets a chance to compete on a reality dating show she decides to risk it all for love in the biggest game of her life.
The city girl is surprised how much she enjoys switching her high heels for cowboy boots and pedicures for mud treatments—and not the kind you find at a day spa. And she’s falling hard for Wil Parker, the sexy, rugged farmer at the centre of the show.
Amidst the chaos, tantrums and editing tape, the heat and passion between Emily and Wil reaches boiling point. But can they survive the imminent explosion, let alone the fallout?
About the Author
Jacquie resides in rural Victoria, Australia, with her husband and two sons. She holds a Bachelor of Business, studied post-grad Writing, Editing, and Publishing at The University of Queensland, and earned a Master of Letters from the University of Central Queensland.
Jacquie is an author of a number of novels, novellas and short stories and is published in the genres of contemporary, fantasy and magic-realism romance. She strives to offer romance, but with complexity; spirituality, without the religion. Her novels express a purpose and offer subtle messages about life, the spirit and, of course, love.
Acknowledgements
I must thank my inspiration source for striking me so thoroughly with this story—may you continue to delightfully unleash your will upon me. I wish to acknowledge my life experience and emotion, good and bad, for allowing me so readily to draw from that deep well. And thank you, time, for being on my side with this story.
Kate Cuthbert, thank you for your continued belief. The behind-the-scenes team at Harlequin and Escape Publishing, thank you for all your work on this story. Brooke Moody, my editor, thank you for your guidance and attention to detail. My beta reader, Lea Darragh, I appreciate your sturdy presence in my life—especially when I hit the lows and practically drown you with great waves of craziness. And, thank you, Liz McKewin, for, despite the kilometres between us, you still remain a true friend and support.
For those who have experienced heartbreak too young
Contents
About the Author
Acknowledgements
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
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Chapter 1
Emily Wolfe should have known after the first round between the sheets that he was a selfish lover. But no, she stupidly gave Mr Hotshot Lawyer a second chance, hoping he’d beat his score of one minute and fifty-seven seconds of embarrassing grunting and one orgasm—his.
Never again. From now on, one strike and they were out, because her fragile state of mind couldn’t handle it anymore.
With the sheet covering her bare breasts, she stared up at the ceiling—beige-like Mr Lawyer was snoring next to her in bed. At least he tried something a little different last night, she’d give him that much, but slapping a girl’s vagina with your penis, because you think it’s hot, makes you a porn-watching loser, not a sex god. Her mood went from hopeful to hopping mad in three slaps flat. She was glad when he ended up finishing quicker than the previous date, one minute and thirty-three seconds and zero foreplay, apart from the penis slapping, that was.
Emily wasn’t looking for a sex god, instead, someone who was generous, knowledgeable of what “real” women wanted, and capable of giving her an orgasm. It had been two long years since she’d met anyone who fit that criterion, and it really, really wasn’t a target set too high.
Fisting the bedsheets, she squeezed hard and bit back a long, angry groan. Two years without an orgasm was not good for any woman’s state of mind.
Randall stirred after one of his snores made him choke. Emily’s belly twisted, knowing she had to prepare herself to deal with an awkward morning-after moment. She didn’t mind the discomfort if it was worth it, but he wasn’t. She rolled her head to the side and looked at the long, lean man. He was handsome, sure, but good looks didn’t make up for where he lacked—and that was in most departments.
Emily needed more qualities in a man, like humour, a moral compass, generosity, and adequate in bed.
See, she wasn’t reaching too high.
She wasn’t asking for mind-blowing or sensational, just adequate. Capable of getting the job done. A man who could distract her from how many seconds were passing during the big act and take the time so she would finish with an O.
Randall smiled languidly and shuffled closer. The sticky wet head of his erection pushed against her thigh. Her eyes widened. He grinned. No way was she going near that again. The nerve of him, to leave her Oless twice now, and expect she spread her thighs and let him at her again.
‘You know what I love?’ he asked squeezing her nipple, too hard, but at least, he found it. She had assumed he wasn’t a breast man or had no idea where they were located. ‘A morning blowjob.’
Emily turned away from him, suppressing the snarl teasing her mouth. An angry roar sat in her throat, demanding release. So, after his poor performance, he now wanted her to suck his dick. And going by his vagina slapping technique, he’d probably ask if he could ejaculate on her face, just for kicks.
She took a deep breath for calm and looked at him again. As evenly as she could, she said, ‘I think you should leave.’ She may have even pushed at his shoulder, she was too livid to notice.
‘What?’ he asked, rolling out of bed, that big useless erection prodding out in front of him.
What a damn waste.
She tugged at the sheet until it came loose from her bed, wrapped it around her, then climbed out on the opposite side. ‘Go! I want you to leave.’ Her voice cracked with emotion. It wasn’t right he was wearing the brunt of the other men who had let her down before him. The others she found on dating sites who wanted sex, but on
ly to satisfy themselves. The others who treated her kindly until they got what they wanted. But she couldn’t help how she was feeling—Randall was the dick that broke the camel’s back.
Randall huffed as he picked up his trousers and stepped into them. ‘Did I do something wrong?’
She nodded, done with hiding the fact that it was an important role to be a generous lover, to actually care about the girl you were screwing, and not treat sex like it was made solely for the satisfaction of men.
Emily’s anger wasn’t totally because he didn’t make her orgasm, she wasn’t that shallow. She was also upset by the guys who would make her pay for half the date, even when she didn’t drink anywhere near as much as them, then take her home for sex only to leave her wanting and dissatisfied, then never call her again.
‘You did do something wrong, Randall. You’re selfish. You didn’t attempt foreplay, then managed to grunt away with your eyes closed for an entire one minute thirty. There is such a thing as a female orgasm, or have you not managed to produce one in your lifetime?’
He gasped, his eyes widening in horror. ‘You timed me?’
She crossed her arms over her chest and blinked back tears. ‘There was nothing else to do.’
He shook his head, his mouth hanging open, but no words came out. With fast, jerky movements, he finished dressing, shoved his wallet into his back pocket, and stamped towards the front door. Emily followed behind him to make sure he was leaving.
‘You know what, Emily, I tried my hardest last night.’
No, he damn well didn’t and he knew it. She may as well not have even been in the room. He didn’t touch her, look at her; the whole moment was all about him.
‘Slapping a girl’s vagina with your dick doesn’t count as trying. Porn isn’t real life. Women don’t like that.’
Randall’s mouth flapped open and shut as he glared at her. His chest was heaving. Nostrils were flared. Oh dear, she’d hit a sore point. Good. Because he hit a sore point with her too, when he should have been hitting another spot altogether, over and over again.
‘If you want an orgasm, go buy a vibrator. I don’t have time for this shit.’
She rolled her eyes as he opened the door, stepped out, and slammed it hard behind him.
‘Typical!’
Emily marched to her room and threw herself on the bed. She covered her face with her hands and cried until her nose was stuffy and her throat was sore.
On the surface, Emily’s life was everything she had worked so hard to achieve. She had a successful career in real estate, selling property to the Melbourne elite, owned her own apartment, bought designer clothes, but she was missing something—human connection and intimacy.
She had friends and family whom she valued, but she needed more. She needed touch and slow kisses, long warm cuddles and body heat. A man would never complete her, she wasn’t so naive to think that. But she did believe a man could complement her. And, at the end of the day, she was more than a mind—she had biological needs too. And emotional requirements. Humans thrived on love and companionship. At the moment, she was starved for both.
Emily wiped her cheeks and reached for her mobile sitting on the nightstand. She dialled her best friend Xanthi’s number.
‘It’s six-thirty on a Sunday morning, this better be good,’ Xanthi said when she answered.
‘I called my date selfish, a dud in bed, then kicked him out.’ Emily’s voice was almost a shriek.
A muffled laugh came down the line. ‘What? Why?’
‘Because I’m sick of selfish pricks—no pun intended. He needed to know the disservice he was doing to women all over Melbourne.’
‘So, I take it there was no O?’
Emily sighed. ‘No. No O. Not even close. But it’s more than that. These guys don’t even care. I’m over being used. I’m not a dirty come-rag they can discard under the bed once they’re done. I want what you have. I’m ready for it. I need it.’
Xanthi scoffed. ‘What? Two kids, no time, and a mummy tummy.’
‘No. Well, eventually I want that, but first I want something else.’
‘What?’
‘A husband.’
There was silence for a long moment. ‘Whoa, you are serious, aren’t you?’
‘Deadly. I’m thirty, it’s about time I settled down.’
‘Being married isn’t all roses and sunshine. It takes work, Em.’ Xanthi’s tone was grim.
Emily squeezed her eyes shut and held her breath. ‘But please, please, please tell me it’s worth it?’
Again the silence. ‘Yeah. It’s well and truly worth it.’
Emily sighed and switched the mobile to her other ear. ‘Then that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to find a husband. All the love games of my twenties are over. It’s time to get serious.’
Another long moment of silence. ‘You do know that if you ever want a marriage to work, you’re going to have to open your heart and trust a man?’ Xanthi’s tone was empathetic, yet assertive. She was well versed with Emily’s deeper issues of trust.
‘Yes. I know that. I can trust. I’m ready to trust.’
‘So how do you plan to find this husband?’
That was a problem. ‘I’m never going near Tinder again, nor any other dating site for that matter. It’s a breeding ground for sex-crazed dicks. Pun absolutely intended.’
‘Then what? You hang out at bars like you’re twenty?’
Emily winced and actually did a little dry-retch just thinking about that. ‘God no.’
‘Not many options left.’
She was right. Options were slim. ‘How did you meet Geoff?’
‘A mutual friend introduced us.’
A proverbial light bulb blinked. ‘Geoff must have single friends. Some of them would be looking to settle down. Surely, he can direct someone my way.’
‘Like a blind date?’
Emily managed a smile as the storm clouds parted. ‘Exactly.’
‘That’s not a bad idea. But I’m not having Geoff go to the trouble of setting you up, just for you to push the man away in the future.’
Emily sighed. This girl knew her too well. But she was determined to be different. There was no longer any choice. She had to behave contrarily to how she had in the past, or she was going to die a lonely, bitter woman.
‘I promise, I won’t.’
‘I’ll ask him then.’
Chapter 2
Dusk was blanketing the property, turning the green to grey and the Great Dividing Range in the distance was illumed in orange from the setting sun. This was Wil Parker’s favourite time of day. His body was heavy from fatigued muscles, and his mind was too tired to think, so he could just walk. Alec, his brother, who was visiting the family farm for the week, strolled beside him.
Wil called Daisy to him. She was an energetic two-year-old cattle dog and the best sheepherder he’d had. Well worth the thousands spent on training. The day had been long—since sunrise he’d been out in the paddocks, roving the cattle through the dippers and tagging the new calves. For the number of cattle on this property, it was an all-week affair requiring extra hands, thus Alec’s visit.
‘What happened with that local woman you were seeing last time I was here?’ asked Alec. He was tall like Wil, the same blond hair, but Wil had their father’s blue eyes while Alec inherited their mother’s green.
‘Don’t ask.’
‘You’re going to have to take the risk again one day, mate.’
Wil shrugged. ‘One day I will.’
Suitable women were scarce in the country. And opportunities to meet them, even slimmer. Wil didn’t help the situation, though. After the heartache caused by his ex-wife, to himself and his entire family, he found it difficult to let another woman in.
‘Seriously. You have to move on. We all have. Or we’re going to be repeating this conversation when you’re sixty.’
Wil looked at his brother with a snarl. ‘I’m twenty-nine. There’s plenty of time.�
� Though in his heart, he knew that was a lie. Not because twenty-nine was getting old, not at all, but because he had always been ready for marriage. For as long as he could remember, becoming a father and a husband were as big a goal in his life as any other. Maybe that’s why he rushed in to marry his high-school sweetheart. He wasn’t about to make that mistake again. Easy does it.
Bending, Alec plucked a long piece of grass from the ground and twirled it between his thick fingers. He may be a stockbroker, but he had the hands of a farmer. Dirt under the nails, his skin was rough and callused. ‘I’ve got a proposition. Well, Sandy does anyway.’
Wil arched a brow. Sandy was Alec’s wife of ten years. Mother of their two gorgeous children. ‘And what’s that?’
‘Hear me out first before you interrupt.’
Wil lowered his brow, narrowed his eyes. ‘Why don’t I like the sound of this? You’re not going to rope me into speed dating or … or … some online dating shit?’ Quickest way to pick up loonies. Not that he’d tried it. He’d heard from mates who had given it a go, unsuccessfully. He may be breaking traditions with his farming, but he was still old-fashioned at heart and intended to meet a partner the old-fashioned way.
‘I said hear me out first.’
‘Fine. Unleash your miraculous idea upon me.’
Alec grinned. ‘Sarcasm not necessary.’
Wil chuckled. ‘Fine. Let me hear it.’
‘Sandy said there’s a show on television. It’s a dating show—’
‘Hell, no!’
‘I said hear me out.’
Wil inhaled noisily. He was single, not dying. He didn’t need to go on some sleazy television show to remedy it. But he’d humour his brother, so he motioned with his hand for Alec to continue.
‘The show is aimed at farmers who are looking for love. And from what Sandy says, it’s been really successful. It’s responsible for six marriages and eight children so far.’
Wil rubbed his hand over his mouth. ‘Seriously, mate, what do you take me for?’
‘I think it would be a good opportunity. The show will send twenty drop-dead gorgeous women out here to spend a couple of months with you on the farm. And I’ve seen these shows before, these women are top notch.’
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