by Fiona Ford
‘Nobody said anything to me at work.’
‘I asked them to keep it a secret,’ Dot said playfully. ‘Thought it would be nice for you to have a bit of a do to celebrate going back to work. It’ll be ready in an hour, so that gives you time to play with his lordship here. Oh, and while I think about it, I’ve taken in two of your old maternity dresses. They’re hanging on the back of your door.’
There wasn’t much that took Alice’s breath away but that did. Over-awed by her landlady’s kindness, she gave Dot a kiss on the cheek.
Dot shooed her away in mock annoyance. ‘Go on, have a rest, you daft sod.’
Alice did just as she was told, but as she turned halfway up the staircase, Arthur balanced on one hip, she was delighted to find her landlady was wearing a smile a mile wide.
Even though she had only seen most of them less than a few hours ago, Alice found herself hugging Flo, Aggie, Mary and even Mr Button as if they were long-lost strangers as they arrived at the little Bell Street terrace.
‘It’s so nice to see you,’ she whispered into Mr Button’s ear.
‘And you, my dear,’ Mr Button replied warmly. ‘I am so sorry I wasn’t there to welcome you back today but I had a rather long meeting with the Liberty board.’
‘That’s all right. To be honest, I spent the day reacquainting myself with everything.’
‘Come here, darlin’.’ Aggie grinned, her green eyes the very spit of Flo’s. ‘It feels like it’s been forever since I ran me eyes over you.’
Alice returned Flo’s aunt’s hug, unable to ignore the fact the older woman appeared to have lost a lot of weight since she had last seen her. Flo was right, the worry of Bill Wilson had been taking its toll. ‘How’ve you been, Aggie?’ she asked gently.
Aggie offered Alice a watery smile as she pulled away and patted Alice’s hand. ‘I’m all right, darlin’, keeping busy. You know how it is.’
‘Only too well.’ Alice sighed as the sound of Arthur’s cries filled the hallway.
Chuckling, Aggie jerked her head towards Flo. ‘This one was the same as a nipper. Always bawling.’
‘I was not!’ Flo protested as she took her aunt’s coat. ‘I was a good baby, that’s what you always used to say.’
‘And you were.’ Aggie laughed again, shaking her grey curls free from her hat. ‘Just a flamin’ noisy one!’
All too soon Dot bustled out into the hallway. ‘Come on, you lot. I’m working me dogs off and you lot are in here gabbing like it’s going on ration.’
‘Sorry,’ Alice said meekly.
‘Never mind sorry, lady, you can get in here and help me plate up,’ Dot said huffily. ‘Anyone seen Rose and Malcolm? Not like them to be late.’
As everyone glanced at one another there was another rap at the door.
‘Speak of the devil,’ Mary said, swinging the front door open with as much ease as if she still lived in the terrace.
As Rose and Malcolm stepped inside, Alice paused for a moment to take in Rose’s appearance. She was the youngest of the Liberty girls and with her luminous pale skin, flaming red hair and smattering of freckles across her nose, she always had an air of innocence about her. Yet it was the sight of the round glasses Rose continued to wear, despite the fact they were largely redundant, which framed her pretty blue eyes, that made Alice want to cry. It was a sign of hope, she thought, taking both coats and hanging them on the bannister, that Rose hadn’t given up, which made Alice both delighted and sad in equal measure.
‘Is that the latecomers?’ Dot shouted, and, without waiting for a response: ‘You’d all better come through and sit down if you don’t want a cold tea.’
Not wanting to risk further rebuke, everyone trooped into the kitchen and sat down at Dot’s large scrubbed wooden kitchen table, Alice settling Arthur in his basket next to her.
‘Right then,’ Dot said, setting the huge pot on the table between them all, ‘you’re all to help yourselves and I don’t want any standing on ceremony.’
‘No chance of that, my love.’ Mr Button gave a half-smile as he started ladling the tripe and onions on to her plate before going on to serve everyone else.
Before long the only sound around the table was chews and murmurs of satisfaction as everyone tucked into Dot’s plate of delights.
‘I dunno how you do it, Dot,’ Aggie said. ‘It’s a triumph.’
‘Best not to ask,’ Dot replied, tapping her nose.
‘You should know, Agatha, I learned that very early on,’ Mr Button said teasingly.
Glaring briefly at Mr Button, Dot turned back to Aggie. ‘You still singing up the Lamb and Flag, love?’
Aggie nodded and Alice noticed her relax for the first time that evening. ‘I am. Twice a week now. I really enjoy it.’
‘She’s ever so good,’ Flo added proudly. ‘The pub’s full when she’s on the bill.’
‘I can’t say I’m surprised, you have a lovely voice, Aggie,’ Mary agreed.
‘You’re both very kind. I keep trying to get Flo to come and do a turn with me but she refuses.’
Alice’s right eyebrow shot up. ‘I didn’t know you could sing, Flo.’
Flo blushed. ‘Not as well as Aggie.’
‘Nonsense,’ Aggie replied firmly. ‘She’s a voice better than mine.’
‘I haven’t got time, Aggie,’ Flo said. ‘You know I’ve my new job to think about now.’
Sensing the signs of an argument brewing, Alice turned to Rose. ‘Am I right in thinking I’m not the only one starting back at work this week?’
Rose’s face flushed with pleasure at Alice’s question. ‘Yes! I start back on Thursday.’
‘We can’t wait to welcome you back,’ Mr Button said warmly.
‘That’s right,’ Flo replied, her eyes brimming with pleasure. ‘You’ll be working with me in the office, if that’s all right?’
‘Oh Flo!’ Rose clamped her hands to her mouth in delight. ‘That will be wonderful.’
‘I hoped you wouldn’t mind,’ Flo said, a hint of relief in her voice. ‘I just thought we might be able to help each other out that way, though of course we’ve got everything all ready for you on the shop floor so you can find your way around a bit more easily.’
‘Are you giving me my own commissionaire to open all the doors for me?’ Rose asked cheekily. ‘You know, complete with top hat and tails?’
‘Not likely.’ Flo laughed. ‘You don’t get one of those before I do.’
‘It’ll be nice, though, to get back to the world you love, won’t it?’ Mary enquired.
‘Of course.’ Rose nodded enthusiastically. ‘And what’s more, I’ve started getting a little of my sight back.’
At the girl’s welcome announcement everyone at the table started to clap and gasp in delight.
‘When?’ Alice cried, cutting through all the noise.
‘Last week,’ Rose said happily. ‘It’s not much, just shapes and a bit of colour.’
‘But it’s a start, love,’ Malcolm said encouragingly, laying his hand on his daughter’s arm.
‘It’s more than a start, it’s wonderful,’ Mary enthused. ‘You’ll be back to your old self before you know it.’
At that Rose’s face darkened. ‘I’ll never be that.’
‘Perhaps not, but it’s good news,’ Alice said consolingly. ‘Just think how lovely it will be to be back and to work alongside Flo.’
At that Rose suddenly brightened. ‘Yes, I have missed you girls.’
‘And we’ve missed you,’ Flo replied earnestly. ‘I can’t wait to have you back with us, Rose love. It’s not been the same without you. I don’t see anyone when I’m up in my little office all day.’
Mr Button raised an eyebrow in concern. ‘You sound rather sad about that. Mrs Matravers used to say the best bit about her job was cherry-picking the best customers to hobnob with.’
‘Well, Flo ain’t no Mabel Matravers,’ Dot said hotly.
‘No I’m not,’ Flo said cautiously. ‘But I
actually miss the customers. Especially some of the regulars.’
‘How’s your David, Mary?’ Dot asked, changing the subject. ‘I haven’t heard you talk about him much.’
Mary nodded. ‘He’s fine. He wrote to me last week and said he thought he would be off to a new destination but of course couldn’t say where. If I’m, honest I’m a bit worried.’
‘Well, I think that’s good news,’ Dot said brightly. ‘It’ll take his mind off his sister’s incarceration if nothing else.’
Alice shook her head in disbelief. ‘Dot! I don’t think that being shipped off to some far-flung destination in the pursuit of war is going to help take his mind off the fact that Mrs Matravers is in prison.’
As Dot opened her mouth ready to fire off in protest, Mary intervened. ‘No, it is good news. It’s just that to me the war seems never-ending. How much worse does it have to get before it gets better?’
Alice nodded in agreement. ‘It seems like we’ve got no chance. Did you read about that American ship the Japs destroyed last month near Christmas Island?’
‘I keep thinking what if that happens to Neil. We’ve only just got married,’ Flo put in, worry etched across her face as she rested her knife and fork on her plate. ‘I’ve not seen him since the day after our wedding; I keep wondering when or if we’ll ever see each other again.’
Dot banged her fist down on the table, making everyone jump. ‘Listen to the lot of you,’ she fumed. ‘The way you’re all carrying on you’d think we’d lost the war already. Our boys need your support not your worry.’
‘I couldn’t agree more,’ Malcolm began, his face grave. ‘When I was injured in the last war it was thoughts of family, friends and the freedoms we were fighting for that gave me the strength to battle on.’
There was a silence then as everyone reflected on what had been said. Alice glanced around the table, feeling humbled by his words.
‘I would like to raise a toast,’ she said loudly. ‘To carrying on in troubled times.’
The assembled group lifted their glasses high and clinked them together. ‘To carrying on in troubled times,’ they echoed.
Glancing around once more, Alice felt a sturdy sense of resolve. Yes, times were hard, but they had food on the table, a roof over their heads and each other to lean on. Together, they would survive whatever life threw at them.
Chapter Four
Alice woke the next morning feeling hot and clammy. Rising from her bed, she reached for Arthur who was just waking up and kissed him on the forehead. As she held her son in her arms, she tried to make sense of her dreams. She and Luke had been reunited at Waterloo train station. As they looked at each other through the crowds they had waved and smiled, but every time Alice went to reach for him he slipped through her grasp.
As Alice blinked her eyes open in the pitch black, trying to adjust to her woken state, she felt a rush of grief flood through her the likes of which she hadn’t felt since she had first received the news that Luke had gone missing. She physically ached for him. He was her soul mate, something she had known all those years ago when she had been a farthing short of a cinema seat at the Coronet and he had offered to pay the difference.
The force of the memory took her by surprise. Alice had never forgotten the feel of his palm against hers as he slipped her the coin, or the warmth of his body as he sat next to her in the cinema. Now she brought his handsome face to mind, closing her eyes, determined to remember every last detail of her husband as if the very act of doing so would bring him back into her life.
Alice had fallen for him as soon as she laid eyes on him. Luke hadn’t been shy about his feelings either. The moment the film was over he had introduced himself, telling her he worked at the nearby docks. She had been impressed, and when he asked her out to the pictures the following night, Alice hadn’t hesitated. They had talked all the way through the film, snuggling up together in the back row, comparing notes on their lives.
She had told Luke all about her father’s criminal ways and the fact that she had been only four when her mother had died giving birth to her sister Joy. She had her pride and she wanted to be upfront. If Luke Milwood had a problem with her or her upbringing better to find out now.
But in fact Luke had no problem at all. Instead he merely remarked that it was sad Alice had been forced to endure so much when she was so very young. In turn he had told her how he had been raised in Aberdeen, his father a dock worker from Bermondsey and his mother a proud Scot. The two had met when his father had gone on a training course at the docks in Aberdeen where his mother was a cleaner in the offices. It had been love at first sight, Luke explained, and so heady that his father had given up his life in London and settled in Scotland immediately. It had been a love story Luke and his younger brother Chris had grown up with. His family never had very much, Luke told Alice, but the one thing they had always had was love, and Luke very much wanted to recreate for himself the love his parents shared. Moving down to London at eighteen to follow in his father’s footsteps at the docks, Luke had been looking for the right girl but never found her until now. Six months later when Luke proposed, Alice had felt giddy at the thought of this very handsome man stepping into her life and had immediately said yes. That had been six years ago, when she was just twenty, and they had married the day she turned twenty-one.
As her son stirred in her arms, she immediately sprang to life. ‘Good morning, sweetheart,’ she crooned.
Arthur merely gurgled delightedly.
‘This morning it’s just you and me while Grandma Dot goes out to work,’ she whispered softly. ‘What do you think about that?’
Arthur of course said nothing, simply happy to enjoy a precious cuddle with his mother.
Setting her son down on her bed, Alice quickly changed him, and as she looked into his large round eyes she realised just how much her son looked like Luke. Of course she knew all babies looked like their father when they were so small but in that moment she could see the resemblance as she never had before. The sight of her husband, alive before her, took her breath away. She needed more than anything to feel Luke with her, to feel as though he was more than just a distant memory.
Her eyes never leaving her son, she opened the door of the little teak cupboard that stood next to her bed. Reaching inside for the large bundle of letters her husband had written to her since he had joined the war, she immediately found the one she wanted – her favourite was always on the top, carrying the very essence of the man she loved. Pulling it from the bundle, she began to read aloud to Arthur:
16th June 1941
My darling,
It has been a quiet day for once, no sorties and no drills, just time to sit down with a cup of tea and catch our breath. It’s been a welcome break for some of the lads here, they’ve all been working their fingers to the bone, they need the chance to let off a bit of steam. But not for me, my love, I hate the lulls. I know it sounds daft, I can hear you now telling me I should enjoy the chance to put my feet up when I can, but I just can’t do it. I like to work because the harder I graft, the more exercises I’m a part of, and the closer I am to getting home and getting back to you and our beautiful baby boy or girl. You’ve always told me to shoot for the stars, Alice. I would never have had the strength to face all the tests I have without you – I can’t wait to do the same for our son or daughter. I want them to have the world.
I miss you so much, my love, my body aches to feel your arms wrapped around me. Your braveness, your strength and your devotion carry me through each day.
There are times when it seems that we will never get home, that we will never win this war and that all this suffering is in vain. There are times I feel as though it’s pointless to carry on, but then an image of you will appear in my mind, and I know that despite everything, I am still the luckiest man on earth. The day I slipped you a farthing in the cinema queue was the best of my life. Who knew you could buy so much happiness with so very little?
Stay strong fo
r me, my love. We will be reunited soon and I cannot wait for the day when that happens.
Your ever-loving husband,
Luke
The strength of love wrapped up in Luke’s words was the tonic Alice needed. She could feel him with her in her every movement.
Wiping her tears, Alice put the letter back in her bedside cabinet and then picked up her son, who was still gurgling away, and carried him downstairs balanced on her hip. As she walked down the steps she realised how much heavier her son was getting and the thought that this little person she and her husband had created was beginning to grow and thrive, despite the hardships of war, helped give her a much needed lift. Setting her son back down in his makeshift cot of a kitchen drawer, she filled the kettle and reached for a pair of cups.
‘Morning,’ Dot called drowsily behind her. ‘Thought I heard you rootling about down here. Didn’t you sleep well?’
Alice shrugged. She had become used to nights fuelled with nothing but broken sleep as Arthur woke crying in the dead of night, demanding to be fed or changed.
‘Sort of,’ she managed in reply.
‘We ought to offer him up to the War Office,’ Dot chuckled. ‘As an alternative to the all-clear siren.’
‘He’s got a pair of lungs on him, make no mistake,’ Alice said wryly over the whistle of the kettle.
‘Like his father!’
Alice regarded her landlady fondly. She had known the older woman since she was a child – since before her father had run off to America to work for the mob in Los Angeles. Dot had been a treasure then, showing her how to wash, cook and clean. ‘You remember what life was like when my old man left, don’t you?’
Dot frowned. ‘’Course. He tried leaving you a pile of ten-bob notes before buggering off leaving you and Joy high and dry.’
‘When he left, I wanted things to change, I wanted to give Joy a proper start in life, a start I’d never had.’