by RJ Blain
“Do it,” Pauline ordered.
Several moments later, I heard the ringing of a phone. “Dr. Sampson speaking.”
“It’s Jake again. Sorry to bother you, but there are a few people who want to ask you about Karma’s hand.”
“A few people?” the woman asked.
“Her parents and my parents.”
“I see.”
“This is Sebastian Thomas, Deputy Chief of Staff of CARD. Agent Thomas tells me you’re responsible for Agent Johnson’s broken hand?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Yes?”
“Yes, sir. I’m responsible.”
Dr. Sampson was a smart woman. I wondered if she’d survive the combined forces of Jake’s family and mine. It’d be a shame if she didn’t. When she wasn’t breathing down my neck, I liked her.
“Explain.”
“Mrs. Thomas ordered me to do the provocation evaluation.”
“Pauline,” Jake’s father rumbled. “Would you care to explain?”
“Don’t you take that tone of voice with me, Sebastian Thomas. Have you forgotten I’m your boss?”
After clearing her throat, Dr. Sampson said, “Agent Johnson passed her initial psychiatric evaluation. Unfortunately, I misjudged how sensitive she would be to my choice of words and she took her justified agitation out on the table. She hit the edge with a substantial amount of force. I was very impressed with how calmly she handled the resulting situation. I’m surprised Agent Johnson hasn’t informed you of this herself. She’s a very forthcoming woman when she’s asked questions.”
“Agent Johnson has probably climbed a tree somewhere,” Jake reported, and I recognized the glee in his voice. “Is there rabies in Britain?”
“Excuse me?”
“Rabies. It’s—”
“I know what rabies is, Agent Thomas. Why are you asking me if there’s rabies here?”
My partner coughed. “Just wondering.”
“Are you trying to tell me you’ve lost track of your partner?”
“She’s a very smart woman. Had I known she was planning to sacrifice me to her parents, I would have run, too.”
“James,” my partner’s mother warned.
“Mom always tells me to tell the truth, but when I do, I get in trouble. Could you explain this phenomenon to me, Dr. Sampson?”
“Since I have you on the phone, Mrs. Thomas, I have already notified Agent Johnson I would sign the authorization forms for her firearm to be returned conditional to her qualifying with her left hand. Would you like me to make the arrangements?”
“Please do,” Jake’s mother replied. “Thank you. I’ll take care of the situation here.”
“Agent Thomas, I recommend you postpone your trip to London until tomorrow. She is scheduled for a new x-ray in the late afternoon at the hospital. Agent Miller has the details for you.”
“I have no problem with making two trips. It’s still early enough in the day. But, seriously… is there rabies here?”
“No, Agent Thomas. Rabies is not a problem here. I am, however, concerned about why you are asking me this question.”
“Long story.”
Shortly after Dr. Sampson hung up, there was a brief but fierce argument between my parents and Jake’s, which ended when they left the room.
The bed creaked as someone’s weight hit the mattress. A moment later, an upside-down Jake appeared. He grinned at me. “You have the strangest parents.”
“You’re still alive?”
Snorting a laugh, he rolled off the bed and flopped onto his stomach. “I won’t lie. I had some doubts for a few minutes there. How the hell did you squeeze under there anyway?”
“Very carefully.”
“Come on out. I texted Agent Miller that I knew exactly where you were and asked him to cover for us while we escape. All we have to do is make it to my rental without getting spotted, and we’ll be free and clear. We’ll get a hotel room in London for the night. Sound good?”
I nodded, uncurled, and wiggled my way out from under the bed. Once my head and shoulders were clear of the frame, Jake helped pull me out the rest of the way. Smiling, he kissed my forehead. “You’re sneaky, you’re clever, and I think I just fell in love with you all over again.”
“Why?”
“You let me watch your back. You also used me as a living shield in a life-threatening situation. I’m so proud of you.”
“I think you’re the one who needs a psychiatric evaluation.”
Laughing, Jake herded me to the door, slowing long enough to grab my bag of medications, stuffing them in my purse before handing it to me. “We’ll leave our bags here and get stuff for the night in London. When Mom railroads the hotel management into giving her a key to our room, they’ll think we’re still around here somewhere. That should keep them off our trail for a few minutes.”
“You’re adding fuel to the flames,” I accused. “On purpose.”
“Damn straight. Fuck, your ma hits like a truck. Does she work out? I might have to get my jaw realigned. You can make it up to me by running away to London with me.”
“Yoga, actually. Please don’t charge her with assault.”
Jake snorted. “I’d never. She was just trying to protect you, I think. Either way, I worry my parents told yours I married you in Ohio. They’re going to find out eventually. I honestly didn’t believe my mom and dad would stay in the dark for long. After the marriage certificate was filed through the courthouse and into the legal system, my marriage status in my file would’ve been updated, and while they might not check your file frequently, I’m sure they check mine.”
Sucking in a breath, I stared at my partner. The blood drained out of my head and pooled in my feet. “Fuck. Oh, fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck shit. We’re dead, Jake. We’re dead. We’re so dead. We’re going to be crucified.”
“Why?”
I whimpered, peeking out the door to check the hallway for any sign of our parents. When I didn’t see anyone, I gestured for Jake to follow me. “I ruined Ma’s dream of me having a big wedding, Jake, and you helped me do it. When she finds out, we’re dead.”
With Agent Miller’s help, we left the castle and reached the SUV Jake had rented without our parents noticing us. Jake drove nice and slow to prevent drawing attention to us until we reached the road leading to London.
“They’re going to kill us when they figure this out,” I informed him, torn between laughter and tears. “We’re going to have the lamest obituaries. The headlines will be worse than when I was kidnapped with Annabelle. I can see it now: Couple elopes, killed by parents. A lesson for the modern generation.”
“I’m pretty sure Mom knew you were still in the room somewhere.”
“Why?”
“You’re joking, right? As if I was going to let you out of my sight after you walked out and took that trip overseas. Mom’s not stupid. Maybe Dad is, but Mom? No. Mom saw I was still in the room while your ma was dressing me down and decided to enjoy the entertainment. Now, Mom has her blind spots, but she’s of the opinion there is no way I would stick around if you weren’t nearby. That said, she won’t anticipate me leaving the castle right out from under her nose. Dad would expect it, but since he probably thinks you’re up a tree somewhere, he’s not going to say anything. Once they put their heads together, they’ll figure it out.”
“We’re so dead.”
“Hey, Dr. Sampson told me she recommended we postpone until tomorrow. She didn’t forbid it. My parents didn’t forbid it, either. Neither did your security detail. We’ll be fine. They’ll only kill us a little.”
“Explain how they can only kill us a little.”
“Very carefully, Karma. Very carefully.”
“If we call Dr. Sampson and beg, do you think she’d smuggle us back to the United States? Maybe she could set us up with a change of identity. We could become hermits somewhere.”
“I don’t mind having a big wedding if it comes with a stay of execution.”
“That might help with my parents,” I conceded.
“You don’t mind?”
“You’re kidding, right? I hate dating. Where else am I going to find a man who’ll marry me without dating me first?”
“So cold, Karma.”
“You like it.”
Jake laughed. “Heaven help me, I do. I still remember the first time you set eyes on me and treated me like you do slugs. I couldn’t tell if you were terrified of me or wanted to riddle me with bullets.”
“I don’t like how people think I’m going to shoot them all the time. Why, Jake? I don’t understand. I’d never do that. I’d never kill someone without just cause.”
“Oh, Karma.”
“Explain it to me, Jake. I don’t understand.”
“When you stop and take a long look at someone, you’re thinking. Behind those bright eyes of yours is someone who is thinking, who is watching every move, and analyzing to predict what will happen next. Most people just react. I do it, Mom does it, you don’t. No, you take those few extra seconds to stop and think, and that makes you beautifully dangerous.”
“Dangerous,” I echoed.
“Wise men fear a strong, smart woman. I’m wise and smart, so instead of fearing you, I fell in love with you.”
Chapter Thirty
Jake confused me, and I spent the entire drive to London trying to make sense of my tangled emotions.
I came to one conclusion: I was a defective human.
The emotion I felt for my parents counted as love—at least, I thought it did. They had dedicated a great deal of their lives shaping mine, and I appreciated it. If they were to disappear, I would miss them. I had a healthy dose of respect for them, though part of that was born of the fear they’d kick my ass if I strayed off the straight and narrow path they wanted for me.
I’d already done a lot of straying by choosing to become an FBI agent, although they had accepted my choice readily enough. I was doing something good with my life, and while they didn’t approve of it, I liked to think I made them proud.
I had friends, but I hadn’t thought too much about how much I loved them. Was there some invisible measuring stick used to gauge the emotion? When did respect, appreciation, and a general enjoyment of someone’s company morph into love?
The night in Pennsylvania and the morning in Ohio had changed things. Until that night, Jake had never called me anything other than my name or partner. I hadn’t realized he had crossed the threshold into friend territory. His lack of overtures, romantic or otherwise, kept me from realizing he was far more to me than just another co-worker.
Did I love the man, or was I just grateful to have a partner who was able, willing, and ready to put up with my shit? I enjoyed his company. Despite my doubts, I knew I could trust him to watch my back. When I needed him, the man had an uncanny ability to show up at just the right moment, wanted or not.
We were entering the outskirts of London when I tired of thinking and decided to take the direct approach. “You confuse the fucking hell out of me, Jake.”
“Do I get a context, or will I have to start making guesses?”
“I don’t understand how it is even remotely possible for you to decide you fell in love with me after speaking to me for five minutes.”
“All right. Deep conversation that could possibly result in my body being tossed in the Thames it is.”
“I thought we already discussed that, Jake.”
“But I like when you narrow your eyes at me. You’re so pretty when you’re cranky with me.”
“You’re a masochist, aren’t you?”
“Only for you.”
“See, there you go confusing me again.”
“This explains why you don’t appreciate dating. You don’t get the point, do you? Jesus, am I ever glad I decided to just watch and wait for my chance to make you mine.”
“Sex.”
“Pardon?”
“That’s what every man I’ve ever dated has wanted from me: sex.”
I wasn’t quite ready to tell him how much more I enjoyed sex with him than the other men I’d been with.
Jake sighed. “You’re a gorgeous woman, Karma. You always have been. You’re the kind of woman that makes a man stop and stare because he just can’t believe you’re real. Of course men want to have sex with you.”
“You, too?” I winced at the hint of disgust in my tone.
It wasn’t Jake’s fault.
“Babe, I wanted every bit of you since I met you. Give me a break here. Those brains partnered with that body? You were my dream come true from the start. Of course I wanted to have sex with you.”
“I had no idea.”
Sighing again, Jake shook his head. “Of course you didn’t. I didn’t want to scare you off. I wanted to know why you seemed so damned skittish, which was why I had a talk with your parents. I’m being completely honest with you when I say I wanted to beat the shit out of whoever made you flinch away from people so damned much. I had been warned you had problems settling with a partner, but no one would give me any more details than you had been shot.”
Being shot hadn’t helped matters, but it wasn’t the main reason I had feared a new partner. Acting as bait to lure out predators had been one of the worst decisions I had ever made. I had gone in knowing the risks, I had accepted them, and as a result, I had emerged relatively unscathed, but the experience had solidified my opinion I wanted nothing to do with men or sex.
Then Jake had come along and changed everything. How had he gotten under my skin? It was like I had a button and he knew exactly where it was and took a gleeful delight in pressing it. Once he pressed it, I was helpless. I didn’t even want to resist him.
Was it because he had waited?
I guessed his patience was part of it. Four years of him watching my back gave me something I didn’t share with many others. He gave me a sense of security. I could sleep with only one eye cracked open instead of both. I could take a shower in peace, knowing he was on guard. When he was in a hotel room with me, I had a few minutes to relax, safe in my knowledge he was there watching over me.
If I had been partnered with anyone else, the thought of my gun being confiscated would have driven me straight into a panic attack, and the realization startled me.
It was easier to think about my disastrous sex life than cope with the thought of losing my gun.
“I wasn’t a huge fan of sex even before I joined the FBI,” I admitted.
“There’s nothing wrong with that you know.”
I shrugged. “That’s not what other men have told me.”
“Their loss. If they didn’t put in the work making sure you were the happiest woman alive, they didn’t deserve you in the first place. I’ve been waiting for my chance with you for four years. There was no way I was going to risk blowing it by being an inconsiderate bastard.”
“Am I supposed to feel guilty for making you wait so long?”
I did, at least a little.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“You told me what you wanted to do with the rest of your life. You told me your dreams, and you told me exactly what you were risking by partnering with me. I respected that—I still do. That’s why I transferred into CARD to come after you. You’re my partner. I wasn’t about to let some rat bastard ruin what you worked so hard for. When we go home, I’ll do everything I fucking can to make sure you get your dream job without someone trying to destroy it for you. If I have to steal Dad’s gun and pistol whip him until he makes it happen, I will.”
My sense of guilt strengthened. “Isn’t it supposed to be a two-way street? What have I done for you? What do you want me to do?”
“The only thing I want from you is for you to keep being you, Karma. You don’t have to do anything. Keep on calling me an asshole when I annoy you. Keep watching my back, because there’s no one else I’d rather have doing the job. If you said you never wanted to have sex with me ever again, fine. I won�
�t go anywhere. I’ll cry myself to sleep each and every night, but I want you, not your body. Okay, who am I kidding? I’m lying. I desperately want to keep having sex, but I want it because it’s with you. Great. Look what you’ve done to me. You’ve turned me into a sappy idiot. Good job, Karma.”
I couldn’t help but laugh. “Sorry.”
“I can think of ways you can make it up to me.”
“I’m sure you can,” I muttered, flipping my middle finger at him. I would have flipped him off twice if the splint hadn’t stopped me.
“I’m looking forward to discussing this later.”
It took Jake almost forty minutes to find somewhere to park. After consulting with his phone, we discovered he had parked several miles away from where he wanted to be. For some reason, I thought walking was a good idea.
I blamed the medication for my stupidity.
While I had done a lot of wandering when I had fled the United States, two weeks of driving around Germany and neglecting my health had damaged me far more than I thought possible. It took less than a half mile for me to feel the burn of unused muscles.
When I started wheezing, Jake paled. “Karma?”
How could I have gone from being able to run several miles to asthmatic in a matter of three weeks? “I think I need to stop for a minute.”
The words came out a lot easier than I thought they would. Jake took hold of my left arm in his hand, his grip so tight I worried he’d leave a bruise. Closing my eyes, I concentrated on my breathing until I was able to fill my lungs despite the tension in my chest and throat.
“How long has that been going on?”
“Hasn’t. Never.”
“I’ll call Dr. Sampson.”
I cracked open an eye in time to watch Jake pull out his phone. Any other time, I would have argued with him.
“Dr. Sampson, It’s Jake. I took Karma to London. We were walking to the shops, and she started wheezing.” The worry in his voice upset me, and I shifted my weight from foot to foot. With his death grip on my left arm, I wasn’t going anywhere, and I wasn’t quite brave enough to use my right.