His self-satisfied smile made her chuckle as he reached into the nightstand for a condom.
“Don’t look so proud of yourself. It’s been a while for me.”
Without responding, he rolled the condom on and threaded his hands through hers, pinning her to the mattress. “Are you sure you’re ready for this?”
She swallowed, trying to read his expression. He looked intense, as though they were on the verge of something more than sex and he wanted her to understand what it meant if they took that next step.
“I think so,” she whispered.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to do casual with you, Tenley. Just so you know.”
His hardness was probing her, teasing her with the promise of the pleasure he could deliver. But she wasn’t stupid enough to think he was saying things he didn’t mean in the heat of the moment. He was asking her if she was ready for a real relationship with him and silently warning her to think it through.
“I’m not very good at relationships. For obvious reasons.” She knew she didn’t have to remind him of her ex-fiancé, but the harsh truth was her ex would always be with her, making it difficult, if not impossible, for her to trust another man.
“What we have is different,” he said, lowering his body. He thrust his hands into her hair, tipping her face up to meet his. “I’m nothing like him. I would never hurt you. You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded slightly. She believed he would never hurt her physically. Emotionally? That was another story. She already felt things for this man she had assumed she’d never feel again, and that scared the hell out of her.
He was a professional athlete. Someone who’s career who could take him to another city halfway around the country at a moment’s notice. And this was her home. Her family, her brothers, and best friend were here. She could never leave.
He brushed his stubble over her cheek as he whispered, “I’m falling for you. Hard.”
Her arms circled his powerful back, and she felt his heart thudding against her chest. He was nervous as he waited for her to respond, and it reminded her that she wasn’t the only vulnerable one in this situation. He was putting his heart on the line too, trying to trust her even though he’d been hurt before.
“I’m falling for you too.” She brushed her lips against his neck as she closed her eyes for fear of a tear slipping down her cheek. Tenley wasn’t a crier. In fact, last night was the first time she’d cried in years, but something about Rowan made her want to bare her soul to him, and she wasn’t sure she liked it.
“That’s all I needed to hear,” he said, positioning his body so they were perfectly aligned. “That you feel it too.”
His eyed captured hers as he entered her slowly. She was transfixed, feeling more in tune with him than she’d ever felt with anyone. Given their powerful attraction, she’d expected fast and hard, but what he gave her was slow and thorough. He made love to her as if he… loved her. His kisses were deep and passionate, his tongue tangling with hers as they spoke without words.
His big hand ventured south. His fingertip dragged along her lips before circling her neck, then closing over her breast. The pad of his thumb created a delicious friction over her taut nipple as she shuddered, raising her hips to meet his.
Rowan raised his body above her, his powerful arms supporting his weight easily as his eyes trailed over her. She felt as though he were memorizing every inch of her, drinking her in as if he couldn’t get enough. No man had ever given her the attention he did. Most were too concerned about their own pleasure to worry about hers, but Rowan made her feel as though the only thing that mattered to him was satisfying her.
The build was slow this time, but no less intense as he coaxed another orgasm from her, kissing her through it until she reached a blinding peak of sensuality that made her want to crawl inside him.
“Jesus, Rowan…”
Her teeth grazed his shoulder as she tried to cope with the barrage of sensations assaulting her. It wasn’t just physical. It was emotional too, almost as if his soul were looking directly into hers. When they finally erupted together, he collapsed on top of her, his body still taut before she felt him relax. She stroked his back with one hand while running the other hand through his cropped, dark hair and wiping the perspiration from his forehead.
He tried to laugh, but it came out as a broken sound instead, as though he was still fighting for breath. “Damn, girl. You nearly did me in.”
When he would have climbed off of her, she did something she never thought she would—closed her arms around his neck and held him tight. She whispered in his ear, “Thank you.”
“For what?” he asked, his lips against her ear.
“For making me feel safe. I needed that.” More than she’d realized.
“Making you feel safe is my job now,” he said, smiling to soften the words. “And I take my work very seriously.”
Tenley didn’t want him to feel responsible for her, but she loved that he cared. “I’m not your problem,” she said, feeling the need to regain some of the ground she’d lost when she surrendered to her feelings for him. “And I can take care of myself.”
He rolled onto his side, propping his head in his hand as he looked down at her. “I’d never consider you a problem, Ten. Being with you is a privilege. And I feel honored that you trusted me enough to let me in last night.”
“And again today?” she joked, trying to add a little humor to a conversation that suddenly felt too real.
“Seriously,” he said, flattening his palm against her stomach. “I know that couldn’t have been easy for you, and I just want you to know that it means a lot to me.”
She bit her lip, wondering how to respond. She was used to deflecting when a guy talked about his feelings, but she didn’t want to do that with Rowan, so she was left confused and uncertain.
“I’ll be right back,” he whispered before heading to the bathroom, presumably to deal with the condom.
When he returned, he studied her, looking concerned before he laid down beside her. “Tell me what you’re thinking.” He ran a fingertip over the crease between her eyebrows. “You look so serious, as though you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.”
“I kind of do,” she admitted. “Not only is my ex out of prison, but you’re in my life now, and I’m just trying to process it all.”
“I get that.” He leaned in and pressed a tender kiss to her lips. “But you don’t have to figure us out. We’ll work out the kinks over time, I’m sure.”
He made it sound so easy, but in her experience, relationships were anything but easy. They were messy and complicated and often scary.
“Do you want to tell me about him?” When she looked away, Rowan said, “You don’t have to, but—”
“I met him in high school,” she said, fixating on the wall-to-wall windows facing the south side of his expansive property. “He seemed like a good guy at first. A little misguided, maybe. But he had a tough upbringing, just like I did.”
“So you could relate?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
She smiled when he threaded his hand through hers, and she knew that was his way of lending his support as she talked about another trying time in her life. She felt as though that was all she did with him—whine about her past. That was so unlike her, since she rarely complained about anything. She’d learned a long time ago that life didn’t owe her a damn thing she didn’t have the guts to earn.
“He was my first real boyfriend. I’d slept with guys before, but he was the first person to really care about me.” She remembered how attentive Justin had been at the start of their relationship, when he was still filled with hope about the kind of future they could have. “He was a musician, in a garage band all through high school. They were convinced they were going to make it big.”
“Sounds like every kid who can play a guitar. They’re all gonna be superstars, right?”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Wh
en did you two get engaged?”
“Right out of high school.” She sighed. “Brant was living on his own by then, already working as a cop, and Walker got a football scholarship out of state.”
“So it was just you and your mom at home?”
“And whatever man she’d shacked up with.” Admitting how promiscuous her mother had been was embarrassing, but she didn’t want to hide anything from him. Either he was going to accept her, warts and all, or he wouldn’t. Either way, she had to know for sure.
“I bet you couldn’t wait to get out of there, huh?”
“That’s why I agreed to marry him, I guess.” She wasn’t proud to admit she’d been looking for an out and Justin provided it. She wanted Rowan to see her as a strong and independent woman who could stand on her own two feet, which she was now. But she hadn’t been then. She’d just been a scared kid who wanted someone to be there for her.
“That’s understandable,” he said. “Sounds like he was a little lost too. You helped each other.”
“Yeah, but things went downhill when the band broke up and he realized making it in the music business wasn’t going to be as easy as he thought. Before long, I was out busting my ass, trying to keep a roof over our heads and food in the fridge, while he laid around all day feeling sorry for himself.”
“How long did that go on?”
“Too long.” She was ashamed to admit she'd stayed with him longer than she should have. Long after she’d stopped loving him and knew the relationship was over. But she had been scared. Scared to leave him. Scared to be on her own. Scared of what he might do when she told him it was over.
Rowan pulled her into his arms, tucking her head under his chin as he stroked her hair. “But you got out, babe. That’s all that matters. He’s out of your life, and he can’t hurt you anymore.”
He wasn’t asking any more questions about what had happened during the final days of their engagement or whether her fiancé had been abusive, and she was grateful. She wasn’t ready to talk about that. In the past twelve hours, she’d already told him more about that period of her life than she’d told a therapist during their first several sessions.
After kissing her forehead, he said, “Why don’t you grab a shower while I make us some breakfast? Do you have to work today?”
“Not until this afternoon,” she said, glancing at the clock behind him. It read 8:12, which meant she could hang out a little longer, unless he had somewhere else to be. “Do you have to train this morning?”
“That can wait ’til this afternoon. Our trainer takes weekends off, so it’ll just be me and Ace anyhow. And since he’s probably still with Stacey—”
“Oh my God!” she said, sitting up as she flattened her hand against his chest, pinning him to the mattress. “Did you text him to make sure he was staying with her at our apartment?”
“He did,” Rowan said, smiling as he drew her in for a kiss. “I love how much you care about other people.”
“I’d never forgive myself if something happened to Stacey because of me.” She didn’t have many close friends since she tended to keep people at arm’s length, but her roommate had broken down most of her walls, working her way into Tenley’s heart without even trying.
“Nothing’s going to happen to her or you,” he said fiercely. “I can promise you that.”
Tenley tapped his chest as she slid to the edge of the bed. “You sound like you do on those TV interviews when you talk about getting in the zone. I always thought you were so sexy when I heard you talk like that.”
He gripped her waist before she could get out of bed. “That’s just my work. Sure, I take it seriously and I want to win. But this is my life, and there’s a hell of a lot more at stake here than money and accolades.”
“I know. Thanks for saying that.” She touched his cheek, appreciating that he cared enough to let her know that what was happening between them mattered to him. Maybe even more than what happened when he was on that mound.
She felt his eyes on her as she walked away, so she looked over her shoulder and winked at him. “Feel free to join me in the shower.”
***
Reese called out after slamming the front door, reminding Rowan that he needed to get his key back.
Scrambling to find his pants so he could meet Reese in the kitchen instead of inviting him into the bedroom, Rowan swore softly. He didn’t think Tenley would want him to know they’d slept together, and guarding her privacy was more important than answering to his little brother.
“Gimme a minute!” Rowan yelled, realizing he’d have to cross the room to grab a pair of sweats from the drawer.
Reese rounded the corner at the same time Tenley opened the bathroom door. Stark naked and dripping wet. Shit.
“Whoa—” Reese said, pretending to cover his eyes, but not before he took a good long look at Tenley.
She squealed, slamming the door.
“Son of a bitch,” Rowan said, glaring at him. “Who do you think you are, letting yourself into my house like you own the goddamn place?” Holding out his hand, he said, “Give me my key back. Now!”
Reese grinned as he tossed the key at his brother. “That is one seriously sweet piece of ass, brother-man. Nicely done.”
“Shut the hell up.”
“What’s the problem?” Reese asked, leaning against the doorframe. “Not as good as you thought she would be?”
Rowan gritted his teeth, reminding himself Reese was family, so he couldn’t beat him senseless. “She’s perfect. And mortified, thanks to you. Now would you get out of here so I can put some pants on?”
“Sure, I’ll start breakfast.”
“No one asked you to stay for breakfast,” Rowan called after him.
He was sure that was exactly what Tenley would want, to sit across the breakfast table from the stranger who’d just seen her naked…
Chapter Ten
After the initial shock and embarrassment of being caught in her birthday suit by Rowan’s brother wore off, Tenley quickly warmed up to Reese. He was hilarious, making sport of ribbing his brother, which she thought was cute. Her brothers had a similar relationship and she felt at home with them, as though she were part of their inner circle.
“Wait ’til the old man meets her,” Reese said, sliding a stack of buttered toast in Tenley’s direction. “He’ll be all over you about settling down.”
Tenley smiled at Rowan’s reaction. It was the first time she’d ever seen him blush. “Your dad wants you to get married?” she asked, gripping his thigh under the table.
“He wants more grandchildren,” Rowan said, rolling his eyes. “A grandson, specifically. One he can take to ball games. Now that he’s retired, he has way too much time on his hands.”
“You said your sister has a daughter, right?” she asked, looking from Reese to Rowan.
“Yeah, but the guy she was engaged to left her just after Marley was born,” Reese said, sounding bitter as he snapped a piece of crispy bacon in half. “She should have known better than to have a kid with him if you ask me. He’s always been a loser.”
Rowan shrugged. “It wasn’t our call, man. You know that. Brit makes her own decisions.”
Alternating between bites of toast and forkfuls of scrambled eggs, Reese asked, “Your brothers ever try to prevent you from getting mixed up with some dirtbag, Tenley?”
She glanced at Rowan, who was frowning at his brother, before he said thorough clenched teeth, “Last warning. Mind your own business.”
“Hey,” Reese said, raising his fork as his gaze traveled between them. “What the hell did I say?”
“Nothing,” Tenley said, offering Reese a reassuring smile. “Um, yeah, my brothers have always been pretty protective of me.” More so now.
“So are they giving you a hard time about this guy?” he asked, nodding toward Rowan. “’Cause I wouldn’t blame them if they were. Trust me, I’ve known him all my life. Nothing but trouble.”
She laughed when Rowan scow
led at Reese and said, “Why don’t you go eat breakfast at the diner and leave us the hell alone?”
“You’re supposed to go with me to see Dad today, remember?” Reese asked. “We’re gonna take him out for lunch.”
“Shit, I forgot about that,” Rowan said, checking his watch. “And I’ve got to train with Ace this afternoon.”
“It’s okay,” Tenley said, touching his arm. “Go grab a shower while I clean up here. If you could just drop me at home before you go and see your dad that would be great.”
“Why don’t you bring her along?” Reese suggested. “You know Dad would love to meet her. After that last gold digger you hooked up with, he’s started questioning your judgment.”
Tenley was sure Rowan could read the panic on her face when she said, “Um, I don’t think we’re there yet, Reese. Meeting each other’s parents is a pretty big deal, and your brother and I haven’t known each other all that long.”
“Oh yeah, sure,” Reese said, shooting a look at Rowan. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to overstep.”
“What else is new?” Rowan asked as he stood, tossing his napkin on the table. “I’ll be back in a bit, babe. If this guy gives you a hard time, feel free to throw him out. It won’t hurt my feelings in the least.”
But she was worried she had hurt Rowan’s feelings by refusing to meet his father. She knew that family was important to him and his dad had clearly been a better parent than her mom had ever been, but she wasn’t ready to take on the role of his ‘official’ girlfriend just yet.
When they heard Rowan close the door to his bedroom, Reese leaned back in his chair, studying Tenley. “I know this is none of my business, but are you really into him, or are you just having fun?”
She didn’t think having fun would be possible in her current state of mind, but being with Rowan did make her forget about her troubles for a while. “Things are complicated, Reese.” She understood his concern for his brother, especially after Rowan’s last relationship, but she wasn’t going to bare her soul to a stranger. “Just know that I like your brother a lot.”
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