“You and Tenley?” His Adam’s apple bobbed repeatedly. “Shit. I didn’t know.”
“Yeah, well, now you do.” Rowan stepped closer, forcing Justin’s back to the wall. “The phone calls stop.” He slammed his hand against the wall next to the smaller man’s head, making him flinch. “You or one of your buddies park outside her place again, and I’ll blow your tires out, then I’ll beat the shit out of you.”
“I want in on some of that action,” Ace said, folding his muscular arms across his chest. “That’s not goin’ down without me, man.”
Rowan hooked a thumb over his shoulder. “You hear that? My buddy wants a piece of you too.”
Justin’s eyes were wide as he clenched his hands at his sides, preparing to defend himself. What a joke. If they unleashed on him, he wouldn’t know what hit him.
Rowan and Ace both grew up on the wrong side of the tracks and Ace had done time straight out of high school, almost losing out on his one and only shot at the big leagues because of a car accident that took the life of his girlfriend’s twin brother.
“You scared?” Rowan asked, leaning in close enough for Justin to hear him whisper. “You should be. You should be as scared as Tenley was when you had her holed up in that warehouse like a caged animal, begging for her life. You sick bastard!” He slammed his fist into the wall beside Justin’s head, making him jump. “I should break you the way you tried to break her.”
“That…” Justin licked his dry lips before clearing his throat. “That was a long time ago. I’m a different person now.”
“Oh yeah?” Ace asked, scowling at him. “Then why’ve you been hanging around her place calling her… sending her flowers?”
“I just wanted her to know I’m sorry about everything that happened.”
Rowan didn’t believe him for a second. If he was sorry, he could have apologized in court.
“You’re a lying sack of shit,” he said, grabbing the front of Justin’s shirt. “You were trying to scare her. Well, let me tell you this—I’ll give you reason to be scared if you don’t stay the hell away from her. You don’t get where I am without making a lot of friends along the way, friends who would do just about anything for me.” He didn’t have to spell it out. Justin may be spineless, but he wasn’t stupid.
Judging by Justin’s expression, Rowan was surprised he hadn’t pissed his pants by now.
“Have I made myself clear?”
Justin nodded vigorously.
Rowan pulled him forward, then slammed him back against the wall hard enough to make his teeth rattle. “This is your one and only warning. You come near the woman I love again—you call her, send her flowers, a text, email, any contact whatsoever—and you’ll be the sorriest son of a bitch alive. Is that understood?”
“Yeah, man, yeah,” he said, raising his hands in surrender. “I got it. I hear ya. Tenley won’t have to worry about me again, I swear.”
“You violated the terms of your probation,” Rowan said, smirking. “I might just have to call your probation officer.” He still couldn’t believe he’d been stupid enough to do that, especially knowing Tenley’s brother was a cop.
“I’m not going back to the joint,” he said, his gaze darting wildly around the room. “I’ll kill myself before that happens.”
“Aw, what a shame that would be. One less loser taking up space.” Ace crooked a finger at his friend. “Let’s get out of here, Row. We’ve wasted enough time on this piece of shit.”
Rowan couldn’t agree more.
Chapter Eighteen
Tenley felt guilty for asking Corrie to come to her place instead of making an appointment at her office, but the thought of stepping into another therapist’s office made her break out in a cold sweat. After she’d spilled her guts about what happened with Justin all those years ago and how she felt that was connected to the fight she’d had with Rowan last night, Corrie simply stared at her, processing it all.
“I guess I just needed a professional opinion,” Tenley said, her hand trembling as she tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. “Am I even ready to be in a relationship? Will I ever be?”
“People who’ve been the victim of a violent crime never forget what happened to them. It becomes a part of who they are, whether they want it to be or not.”
She nodded, knowing that single event had changed the course of her life forever.
“But that doesn’t mean they can’t go on to have happy, fulfilling lives in spite of it.”
Until she met Rowan, Tenley had been so focused on survival, she hadn’t considered whether she was happy. “I want to be with Rowan, assuming he still wants to be with me.”
Corrie smiled. “But?”
“I’m worried that stuff like this will keep happening. That he’ll say or do something to trigger me, and I’ll go off on him for no reason.”
“Based on what you told me, you didn’t exactly go off on him for no reason. I think your anger was justified, given he was trying to pry into a part of your life that really was none of his concern since it happened before you two met.”
“I just want to be normal.” The words sounded weak, almost foreign on her tongue.
Corrie chuckled, shaking her head. “Since I’m here as your friend, not your therapist, I can tell you this—normalcy is an illusion. No one is ‘normal,’” she said, air-quoting the word. “Besides, who would want to be normal? That’s boring.”
Tenley appreciated Corrie’s attempt to make her feel better, but a boring life sounded pretty damn good to her. “I’m just sick of all the drama. I’m tired of looking over my shoulder, being suspicious of everyone, unable to let my guard down or let anyone in.”
“I agree there comes a time when you have to take a chance and trust someone. Even if it’s scary.”
“I thought I trusted Rowan.” She bit her lip, considering what she just said. “I do. I do trust him, but I’m afraid I may have too much baggage to make him happy.”
“It’s not your job to make him happy. It’s your job to make yourself happy.”
“What do you mean?” She always assumed people in relationships tried to make their partners happy. That was the foundation of a good relationship, wasn’t it?
“Does seeing Rowan happy make you happy?”
She loved seeing him smile and hearing his laugh. She loved to watch him work out with his trainer, knowing he was in the zone. She couldn’t wait to be in the front row at his next game, watching him do what he loved most… assuming she got the chance.
“Sure.”
“Don’t you think he feels the same way, that all he wants is to see you happy?”
“I guess so.” I know so.
“So just focus on making Tenley happy,” Corrie said, reaching for her hands. “And let Rowan focus on making himself happy. Two people who are content and enjoying their lives usually make for a pretty compatible couple when they’re focused on getting their own needs met and not relying on their partner to meet all of their needs.”
Everything she said made sense. If Tenley didn’t have to rely on Rowan to be her everything, a committed relationship didn’t seem as scary.
“The most important thing,” Corrie said, “is that you go on being the strong, independent woman you were even before you met him.”
“I don’t feel very strong sometimes,” she admitted, lowering her head.
“I’ll let you in on a little secret,” Corrie whispered. “Neither do I. It’s part of being human, I think.”
Hearing someone like Corrie, who seemed so self-assured, tell her she wasn’t a complete mess made Tenley feel so much better about the odds of her relationship with Rowan going the distance.
“So you really think Rowan and I can work this out?” She reached for the now-tepid coffee she’d made when Corrie arrived.
“If you love each other,” she said hesitantly. “If you allow him to be there for you, to support you. If you’re willing to be honest with him when you’re scared and vulnerable, or
when something happens to trigger a bad memory.” She reached for her own coffee. “I guess I’m asking whether you’re willing to let this man be your best friend, Tenley. Your rock.”
Was she willing to let someone get that close to her? Closer than Justin had ever been, even before he hurt her? The alternative was to go on living alone, afraid to get hurt again. She didn’t want that, not when she could be with Rowan instead. “I think I’m ready for that.”
Corrie took a sip of her coffee before standing. “Then my work here is done.” She pulled Tenley into a long hug when she stood to walk Corrie to the door. “Just remember that I’ll always be here for you, as a friend, whenever you need to talk.”
“Thank you so much,” she whispered, squeezing Corrie hard. “You have no idea how much you’ve helped me.”
When Tenley opened the door, she was shocked to find Rowan standing on the other side.
“Hey,” he said quietly, as though he was uncertain what her reaction would be.
“Hi, Rowan.” She gestured to Corrie. “This is my friend Corrie.”
“I’ve heard a lot of great things about you,” Rowan said, extending his hand with a smile. “It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”
“You as well,” she said, clasping his hand between both of hers. “Well, I know you two have a lot to talk about, so I’ll be on my way. Call me later, Tenley?”
“Of course.”
They waited for Corrie to step onto the elevator before she invited Rowan inside.
“I hope you don’t mind that I stopped by without calling first?”
She wanted him to kiss her, hug her, something to let her know he still cared. After last night, she had no idea what he was thinking or feeling. For all she knew, he could be here because he was man enough to tell her face to face that it was over.
“No, it’s no problem.” She gestured to the cups on the table. “I just made a fresh pot of coffee for me and Corrie. Would you like a cup?”
“No, thanks.”
She hated that they were acting like polite strangers instead of two people in love. Even though they hadn’t said the words, Tenley knew she loved Rowan. She just prayed he felt the same way about her.
“Do you want to sit down?”
“Sure.”
He walked toward the small sofa and took a seat near the middle, forcing her to sit right next to him. She supposed that was a good sign.
“I’m sorry about last night,” she said, feeling awkward even mentioning it. There was no way he’d be able to forget it, but she wished she could.
“I’m sorry,” he said, reaching for her hand. “It’s none of my business who you slept with before you met me.”
“It was a rough night for me,” she admitted, running her thumb over the faded scars on his knuckles. “And a rough day today. But thanks to Corrie, I have a better understanding of what happened and what I can do about it.”
“I want to hear all about it,” he said, his eyes zeroing in on her mouth when she licked her lips. “But first I should tell you about my run-in with your ex.”
“What?” She immediately thought of Andrew before realizing that wasn’t the ex he was talking about. “Justin?” She could barely say his name without feeling nauseated. “How? Where? When?”
“Brant told me where I could find him.” He smirked. “But he made me promise I wouldn’t beat him senseless. Believe me, it took a hell of a lot of restraint not to do just that.”
“What happened?” She couldn’t even imagine Justin going up against Rowan. He would cower in fear of a real man. He liked bullying little people, namely women.
“Let’s just say I’m confident he won’t be bothering you again.”
She released the breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding and hugged him. “Thank you. You didn’t have to do that, but thank you.”
“I did have to do that.” He pulled back and tucked her hair behind her ear before his thumb brushed her cheek while his other hand curled around her jaw. “The days of that bastard terrorizing you are done, Ten. As long as there’s breath in my body, I promise he’ll never hurt you again. No one will hurt you, not if I can help it.”
She’d spent so many years learning how to defend herself, developing her strength and wit, but hearing that Rowan was in her corner, that she could always count on him, made her feel even safer than the gun that had become her constant companion.
“I believe you.”
“I never thought I’d feel this way,” Rowan said hoarsely. “But something about you just does it for me.”
She smiled at his choice of words. “Nice to know I do it for you. The feeling’s mutual.”
“I’m not just talking about the sex, though that’s incredible.” He grinned, making her heart stutter. “I’m talking about…” He shook his head as though he was searching for the right words, but they eluded him. “The fact that I fall asleep thinking about you. I wake up thinking about you. I think about you in the shower. I get my bell rung when I’m sparring with Ace because I’m thinking about you.”
She couldn’t help but laugh at the picture he painted, knowing full well his best friend wouldn’t hesitate to take advantage of his distracted state. “I think about you all the time too.”
“But it’s more than just thinking about you.” His eyes landed on hers, and she knew whatever he was about to say could be a game changer for them. “I want to be with you all the time. I want to come home to you. I want to wake up next to you. I want to curl up and watch TV next to you.”
She swallowed, trying to make sense of what he was suggesting. “It sounds like you’re talking about living together.”
“It may sound crazy, since we haven’t known each other that long…” He looked adorably uncertain when he said, “But…dammit… I love you.”
It wasn’t the romantic declaration most girls probably hoped for, but she wasn’t a roses-and-poetry kind of girl. She was tattoos and motorcycles… like Rowan. She was sports highlights, cold pizza, and beer… like Rowan. She was working out hard and playing harder… like Rowan. God, he was right about them being perfect for each other.
“I love you too.”
His kiss crushed her, but not with its intensity. With its tenderness.
“I know what I want, Ten. You with me. All the time.”
“Before I answer that, we should talk about what happened last night.” She wanted him to know that she hadn’t slayed all her demons yet. “I had a flashback when we were in your car and you started—”
“Ace told me.” He shook his head. “I’m so sorry I stirred up all those bad memories, baby. I’m even sorrier that I reminded you of that bastard in any way.”
Rowan was as far removed from Justin as a man could be. The only thing they had in common was a penis.
“I can’t promise I’ll ever be able to forget what happened with Justin,” she admitted, thinking about what Corrie said. “There may be times when I wake up in the middle of the night screaming because I’m back in that warehouse—”
“And I’ll be there to hold you,” he whispered, pulling her into his arms. “To tell you that everything’s gonna be all right. Because it will, babe.” He slipped a finger under her chin, tilting her head back so she could meet his eyes. “As long as I have you, I feel like there’s nothing I can’t do, nothing I can’t take on. I want you to feel the same way.”
“I do.” She’d never felt stronger than she did when she was with Rowan. “I’ve spent so many years alone because I thought a relationship would make me weak. But you just make me feel stronger, better…” She smiled. “More invincible, and that’s a pretty great feeling.”
“Does that mean you’ll move in with me?”
Since she was pretty sure Stacey intended to take Ace up on his offer, she’d either have to find a cheaper place or a roommate, but that wasn’t why she wanted to move in with Rowan. She wanted to move in with him because she couldn’t get enough of him. She couldn’t imagine not wanti
ng to be with him every possible minute, but she had to ask. “Are you sure you won’t get sick of me?”
He leaned back as a slow smile spread across his handsome face, then he kissed her. “I’m not worried about that.”
“I’ll take over your closets and drawers, you know.” That was a total lie. She wasn’t a girly-girl with tons of clothes and shoes. She just wanted to scare him a little.
“I’m okay with that,” he said, nuzzling her neck.
“You know you’ll have to do all the cooking, right?”
He was already popping the buttons running down her shirt. “Sure, no problem.” He popped the front clasp of her bra and made her gasp when his thumb and forefinger closed over her nipple.
“I’m paying my own way.”
“Tenley,” he warned, wrapping his huge hand around her ribcage. “I don’t want your money. Keep it. In fact, moving in with me means you can give your brother notice that you won’t be working for him anymore. You don’t need to be working two jobs, running yourself ragged.”
She sat up straighter, shifting to face him. “Are you telling me to quit my job?” ‘Cause that was not going to fly.
He chuckled, shaking his head. “You think I’m that stupid? I was merely suggesting it. Now that we’re gearing up for another baseball season, our time together will be seriously limited. When I am home, I don’t want you to be at work.”
His argument was rational, but she had a feeling he had an ulterior motive for suggesting she quit the bar. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with the guys who come in there and ask me out, would it?”
He trailed his lips down her neck, and she forgot why she was calling him out.
“Maybe,” he admitted before his tongue flicked over her ear, and she shuddered. “Okay, I’ll admit it. I’m a Neanderthal who doesn’t want other guys coming on to my girl. Happy now?”
Her arms circled his neck as tears filled her eyes. With anyone else, she would have been embarrassed by the display of emotion, but not with him. “Am I happy now? Honestly? I’m happier than I’ve ever been, Rowan.”
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