XII.
All at once she jumped to her feet, and ran at full speed down the hilland into the wood. She heard howlings and yellings on all sides of her,but she ran straight on, as near as she could judge. Her spirits roseas she ran. Suddenly she saw before her, in the dusk of the thick wood,a group of some dozen wolves and hyenas, standing all together right inher way, with their green eyes fixed upon her staring. She faltered onestep, then bethought her of what the wise woman had promised, andkeeping straight on, dashed right into the middle of them. They fledhowling, as if she had struck them with fire. She was no more afraidafter that, and ere the sun was up she was out of the wood and upon theheath, which no bad thing could step upon and live. With the first peepof the sun above the horizon, she saw the little cottage before her,and ran as fast as she could run towards it, When she came near it, shesaw that the door was open, and ran straight into the outstretched armsof the wise woman.
The wise woman kissed her and stroked her hair, set her down by thefire, and gave her a bowl of bread and milk.
When she had eaten it she drew her before her where she sat, and spoketo her thus:--
"Rosamond, if you would be a blessed creature instead of a mere wretch,you must submit to be tried."
"Is that something terrible?" asked the princess, turning white.
"No, my child; but it is something very difficult to come well out of.Nobody who has not been tried knows how difficult it is; but whoeverhas come well out of it, and those who do not overcome never do comeout of it, always looks back with horror, not on what she has comethrough, but on the very idea of the possibility of having failed, andbeing still the same miserable creature as before."
"You will tell me what it is before it begins?" said the princess.
"I will not tell you exactly. But I will tell you some things to helpyou. One great danger is that perhaps you will think you are in itbefore it has really begun, and say to yourself, 'Oh! this is reallynothing to me. It may be a trial to some, but for me I am sure it isnot worth mentioning.' And then, before you know, it will be upon you,and you will fail utterly and shamefully."
"I will be very, very careful," said the princess. "Only don't let mebe frightened."
"You shall not be frightened, except it be your own doing. You arealready a brave girl, and there is no occasion to try you more thatway. I saw how you rushed into the middle of the ugly creatures; and asthey ran from you, so will all kinds of evil things, as long as youkeep them outside of you, and do not open the cottage of your heart tolet them in. I will tell you something more about what you will have togo through.
"Nobody can be a real princess--do not imagine you have yet been anything more than a mock one--until she is a princess over herself, thatis, until, when she finds herself unwilling to do the thing that isright, she makes herself do it. So long as any mood she is in makes herdo the thing she will be sorry for when that mood is over, she is aslave, and no princess. A princess is able to do what is right evenshould she unhappily be in a mood that would make another unable to doit. For instance, if you should be cross and angry, you are not a whitthe less bound to be just, yes, kind even--a thing most difficult insuch a mood--though ease itself in a good mood, loving and sweet.Whoever does what she is bound to do, be she the dirtiest little girlin the street, is a princess, worshipful, honorable. Nay, more; hermight goes farther than she could send it, for if she act so, the evilmood will wither and die, and leave her loving and clean.--Do youunderstand me, dear Rosamond?"
As she spoke, the wise woman laid her hand on her head and looked--oh,so lovingly!--into her eyes.
"I am not sure," said the princess, humbly.
"Perhaps you will understand me better if I say it just comes to this,that you must NOT DO what is wrong, however much you are inclined to doit, and you must DO what is right, however much you are disinclined todo it."
"I understand that," said the princess.
"I am going, then, to put you in one of the mood-chambers of which Ihave many in the house. Its mood will come upon you, and you will haveto deal with it."
She rose and took her by the hand. The princess trembled a little, butnever thought of resisting.
The wise woman led her into the great hall with the pictures, andthrough a door at the farther end, opening upon another large hall,which was circular, and had doors close to each other all round it. Ofthese she opened one, pushed the princess gently in, and closed itbehind her.
The princess found herself in her old nursery. Her little white rabbitcame to meet her in a lumping canter as if his back were going totumble over his head. Her nurse, in her rocking-chair by the chimneycorner, sat just as she had used. The fire burned brightly, and on thetable were many of her wonderful toys, on which, however, she nowlooked with some contempt. Her nurse did not seem at all surprised tosee her, any more than if the princess had but just gone from the roomand returned again.
"Oh! how different I am from what I used to be!" thought the princessto herself, looking from her toys to her nurse. "The wise woman hasdone me so much good already! I will go and see mamma at once, and tellher I am very glad to be at home again, and very sorry I was sonaughty."
She went towards the door.
"Your queen-mamma, princess, cannot see you now," said her nurse.
"I have yet to learn that it is my part to take orders from a servant,"said the princess with temper and dignity.
"I beg your pardon, princess," returned her nurse, politely; "but it ismy duty to tell you that your queen-mamma is at this moment engaged.She is alone with her most intimate friend, the Princess of the FrozenRegions."
"I shall see for myself," returned the princess, bridling, and walkedto the door.
Now little bunny, leap-frogging near the door, happened that moment toget about her feet, just as she was going to open it, so that shetripped and fell against it, striking her forehead a good blow. Shecaught up the rabbit in a rage, and, crying, "It is all your fault, youugly old wretch!" threw it with violence in her nurse's face.
Her nurse caught the rabbit, and held it to her face, as if seeking tosooth its fright. But the rabbit looked very limp and odd, and, to heramazement, Rosamond presently saw that the thing was no rabbit, but apocket-handkerchief. The next moment she removed it from her face, andRosamond beheld--not her nurse, but the wise woman--standing on her ownhearth, while she herself stood by the door leading from the cottageinto the hall.
"First trial a failure," said the wise woman quietly.
Overcome with shame, Rosamond ran to her, fell down on her knees, andhid her face in her dress.
"Need I say any thing?" said the wise woman, stroking her hair.
"No, no," cried the princess. "I am horrid."
"You know now the kind of thing you have to meet: are you ready to tryagain?"
"MAY I try again?" cried the princess, jumping up. "I'm ready. I do notthink I shall fail this time."
"The trial will be harder."
Rosamond drew in her breath, and set her teeth. The wise woman lookedat her pitifully, but took her by the hand, led her to the round hall,opened the same door, and closed it after her.
The princess expected to find herself again in the nursery, but in thewise woman's house no one ever has the same trial twice. She was in abeautiful garden, full of blossoming trees and the loveliest roses andlilies. A lake was in the middle of it, with a tiny boat. So delightfulwas it that Rosamond forgot all about how or why she had come there,and lost herself in the joy of the flowers and the trees and the water.Presently came the shout of a child, merry and glad, and from a clumpof tulip trees rushed a lovely little boy, with his arms stretched outto her. She was charmed at the sight, ran to meet him, caught him up inher arms, kissed him, and could hardly let him go again. But the momentshe set him down he ran from her towards the lake, looking back as heran, and crying "Come, come."
She followed. He made straight for the boat, clambered into it, andheld out his hand to help her in. Then he caught up the littleboat
-hook, and pushed away from the shore: there was a great whiteflower floating a few yards off, and that was the little fellow's goal.But, alas! no sooner had Rosamond caught sight of it, huge and glowingas a harvest moon, than she felt a great desire to have it herself. Theboy, however, was in the bows of the boat, and caught it first. It hada long stem, reaching down to the bottom of the water, and for a momenthe tugged at it in vain, but at last it gave way so suddenly, that hetumbled back with the flower into the bottom of the boat. ThenRosamond, almost wild at the danger it was in as he struggled to rise,hurried to save it, but somehow between them it came in pieces, and allits petals of fretted silver were scattered about the boat. When theboy got up, and saw the ruin his companion had occasioned, he burstinto tears, and having the long stalk of the flower still in his hand,struck her with it across the face. It did not hurt her much, for hewas a very little fellow, but it was wet and slimy. She tumbled ratherthan rushed at him, seized him in her arms, tore him from hisfrightened grasp, and flung him into the water. His head struck on theboat as he fell, and he sank at once to the bottom, where he laylooking up at her with white face and open eyes.
The moment she saw the consequences of her deed she was filled withhorrible dismay. She tried hard to reach down to him through the water,but it was far deeper than it looked, and she could not. Neither couldshe get her eyes to leave the white face: its eyes fascinated and fixedhers; and there she lay leaning over the boat and staring at the deathshe had made. But a voice crying, "Ally! Ally!" shot to her heart, andspringing to her feet she saw a lovely lady come running down the grassto the brink of the water with her hair flying about her head.
"Where is my Ally?" she shrieked.
But Rosamond could not answer, and only stared at the lady, as she hadbefore stared at her drowned boy.
Then the lady caught sight of the dead thing at the bottom of thewater, and rushed in, and, plunging down, struggled and groped untilshe reached it. Then she rose and stood up with the dead body of herlittle son in her arms, his head hanging back, and the water streamingfrom him.
"See what you have made of him, Rosamond!" she said, holding the bodyout to her; "and this is your second trial, and also a failure."
The dead child melted away from her arms, and there she stood, the wisewoman, on her own hearth, while Rosamond found herself beside thelittle well on the floor of the cottage, with one arm wet up to theshoulder. She threw herself on the heather-bed and wept from relief andvexation both.
The wise woman walked out of the cottage, shut the door, and left heralone. Rosamond was sobbing, so that she did not hear her go. When atlength she looked up, and saw that the wise woman was gone, her miseryreturned afresh and tenfold, and she wept and wailed. The hours passed,the shadows of evening began to fall, and the wise woman entered.
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