by A. D. Ryan
Chapter 2 | So Many Memories
The end of the day couldn't have come soon enough. Most days I truly enjoyed my job, but I was so worn out from the night before that I just couldn't find that same drive. That's not to say I didn't listen to my patients and give them the best care they deserved. I was still a professional. However, today was a particularly low traffic day, and when I had fewer patients, I had more down time to think of the shit-storm my life had become these last few years.
I packed up my briefcase and exited my corner office as quickly as possible, anxious to pick Charlie up and hear all about her exciting day. I passed the receptionist on my way out and waved. “Goodnight, Jill. See you tomorrow.”
“Goodnight, Dr. Martin,” she replied with a flirtatious smile.
I shook my head as I pushed my way through the doors. It didn't seem to matter to other women that I was married—happily, or not—they all seemed to think I would succumb to their advances. It grew quite tiresome after a while.
I climbed into my car and checked my phone to see if Cassie had returned my call from earlier. She hadn't, not that I was surprised. After taking a moment to try to remind myself she was probably really tied up with work all day, I finally started the car and headed through town to my parents' house.
When I arrived, I found Charlie outside with Jen and one of my best friends—who also happened to be my sister's husband—Alex, playing a game of “Tag.” I laughed as Alex ducked and rolled to evade my sister's touch. When he got up, he had bits of grass and leaves scattered in his brown hair. I put the car into park and stepped out.
“Daddy!” Charlie cried, rushing across the lawn to come see me. “We need a time-out! My daddy's here!”
Alex stood up and furrowed his brow. “Hey! No fair! When I asked for a time-out, you said they weren't allowed,” he teased, acting petulant.
Charlie laughed at him as she hopped into my awaiting arms and squeezed me. I returned her embrace as I spoke. “Hey, sweetie. How was your day?”
She wriggled free and looked me square in the eyes. “It was so good!”
“Fantastic,” I said happily. “Are Grandma and Grandpa inside?”
She nodded excitedly. “Mmm hmm. Gramma's cookin' dinner.”
“Thanks. You go and play with your aunt and uncle. I'm going to go and say hi and then we'll head for home, all right?” I suggested.
Her smile lit up her face as she turned and ran back to the lawn. “Time-on!” she squealed as she ran for Alex. He picked her up and carried her quickly away from Jennifer as she continued to try and tag them both.
“That's not even close to being fair, Alex!” Jennifer cried out as I walked through the front door. Sometimes it was hard to believe she was a year older than me.
Once inside, I removed my shoes and padded through the massive entryway. As I walked through the hall on my way to the kitchen, I couldn't help but look at each and every picture of happier times. Pictures of mine and Cassie's wedding adorned the wall, along with pictures of Jennifer and Alex's. Then, there were oodles of pictures of Charlie, some with only her and Cassie, others of her and me, and then a few of the three of us together. It didn't escape my notice that the last family picture we had of the three of us was when Charlie was two.
Shaking my head, I made my way to the kitchen, promising myself that we would go and have some more taken soon. When I walked through the doorway, I found my father hard at work over the stove, and my mother was peeling carrots.
“Hey,” I greeted, leaning on the counter across from my mom as she meticulously peeled the bright vegetables. “How did everything go today?”
Mom laughed. “Well, your daughter has about three hundred pictures to show you from today. Though, I think only seventy are from the zoo. She and Seth were taking pictures of absolutely everything today while he and his mother were over.” She laughed softly. “You should really just arrange their marriage now. I'm pretty sure they're meant to be together.”
“She's only four and you're already trying to marry her off to the neighbor boy. Nice, Mom,” I teased just as the front door opened and Charlie ran into the room, closely flanked by Jen and Alex, who took a seat at the table.
I scooped Charlie up in my arms and held her close. “Besides, Charlie is quite sure she doesn't even like Seth.”
“Oh no, Daddy. Seth is my very best friend now,” she informed me seriously, her eyes as wide as saucers.
“Is that so? And what made you finally come to this conclusion?” I questioned.
Charlie smiled brightly. “He shared his cookies before lunch,” she whispered, chancing a glance over at her grandmother to be sure she hadn't heard.
My mother didn't look up to acknowledge Charlie's pre-lunch snack, but she smiled knowingly as she continued to prepare dinner. “Jack, will you and Charlie be joining us for dinner tonight?” she asked, looking up to meet my gaze.
“No thanks. I think we're going to try for a quiet family dinner tonight,” I declined politely.
Mom arched her brow and glanced at me disapprovingly. She shook her head quickly and returned her attention to the vegetables in front of her. “You know, Jack, I'm worried about you two,” she told me.
I took a deep breath and forced a smile as I looked into Charlie's bright eyes. “Don't, Mom. Not now,” I pleaded, hoping for Charlie's sake that she wouldn't bring up my marital discord with Cassie.
“I'm sorry, but I am,” she continued.
I sighed exasperatedly. “Look, everything is fine. I should get Charlie home, though. I'll see you guys tomorrow.” I turned and started for the door.
I was just putting Charlie's shoes and jacket on when my dad joined us in the doorway. “Son, don't be upset with your mother. We're both concerned. Ever since—”
“Enough!” I shouted, causing Charlie to jump at the volume of my voice, and her eyes instantly filled with tears. I swept her up into my arms and stood quickly. I narrowed my eyes at my father and clenched my teeth together. “It's really none of your concern.”
Wrapping her arms tightly around my neck, Charlie buried her face into my shoulder, and I could feel her warm tears seep through the fabric of my shirt. Her quiet sobs soon caused her breathing to shorten as she gasped for air.
“Shhh, Charlie. Daddy's sorry for yelling.” I turned back to my father. “Look, I have to get her home. I'm sorry.”
With an unspoken understanding, he nodded as I turned and opened the door. I walked to the Audi and placed Charlie in her seat, strapping her in tight as she swiped at her blotchy red eyes and sucked in an unsteady breath of air.
I kissed her forehead softly before looking into her eyes. “Baby, I'm sorry for shouting. I didn't mean to frighten you.”
“I…I know,” she said between sobs.
I offered her a wide smile and rested my forehead to hers. “What do you say we go home and make dinner? Then after dinner you can have your ice cream?” I suggested, hoping to take her mind off the argument I had just had with her grandparents.
She raised her eyebrows at me and sniffled once more. “Double ice cream, renember?”
“Right, double.”
With Charlie feeling a little better, I closed her door and slid behind the wheel. Charlie was quiet the entire trip, which was incredibly out of character for her. She was usually exuberant while she spoke about her day with her grandmother. Not today, however. I looked back at her through my rearview mirror and saw her looking sadly out her window. She took a deep breath and sighed, and my heart broke a little inside.
I pulled the car to a stop in our driveway and turned to look at her. “Charlie, baby? Are you all right?”
She turned her head to face me slowly and nodded. “Mmm hmm.”
“Okay, as long as you're sure,” I said, a hint of worry in my voice.
It upset me that she was affected so deeply by my disagreement with her grandparents, and I had no one to be angry with but myself. I had always tried to shield her from this sort of thing
, only I failed miserably this time around.
Sighing, I grabbed my briefcase and exited the car before going around to help her out. We walked side by side up the front steps, and she waited patiently as I unlocked and opened the door for her. Once inside, she slipped out of her jacket and shoes and put them away before padding slowly toward the kitchen.
Always one step behind her, I watched as she pulled her chair at the table out and sat down. She placed her palms flat on the table and rested her chin on the tops of her hands. I was silent for a moment as I waited for…something. Anything.
“So, what would you like for dinner tonight?” I asked, hoping that involving her would rouse her a little.
She turned her head to me, keeping her chin firmly on the tops of her hands, and shrugged. “I don't know. Sgabetti?”
I chuckled at the cute way she always mispronounced the word. “Sounds delicious,” I told her as I headed for the fridge to start preparing it. “Would you like to watch some television before dinner?”
“No, thank you. Can I color pictures instead?” Her voice was so quiet, withdrawn.
I offered her a big smile. “Of course you can. I'll go get your stuff,” I offered before exiting the kitchen for Cassie's home office. Charlie's pad of art paper and her crayons were on the corner of the desk, so I scooped them up and took them back out to the kitchen table.
“Thank you, Daddy,” she said as she opened up her box of crayons and leafed to a fresh piece of paper.
I kissed the top of her head and smiled. “You're welcome, bug.” I headed back to the kitchen and continued to prepare dinner, every once in a while looking up at Charlie as she colored. I couldn't help but smile every time I witnessed her tongue occasionally peek out from her lips and her forehead furrow with deep concentration. She was truly something else, and I couldn't imagine my life without her. She brightened up every day.
I just wished that Cassie saw it that way.
As dinner cooked, I kept glancing up at the clock, always wondering if Cassie would actually make it on time tonight. Seven o'clock arrived and dinner was ready; sadly, Cassie was still absent. With an aggravated sigh, I plated the pasta and sauce and carried it over to the table. Charlie pushed her artwork away from her place to make room for her plate, and she dug right in.
“So, you had a good day today?” I asked, hoping for details.
With her little mouth full from the bite she had just taken, she simply nodded in response. “Mmm hmm.”
“And you got a lot of pictures?” I inquired before I took a bite.
She swallowed her spaghetti quickly. “Oh, yes. I took a billion pictures today. Can we look right now?” she asked excitedly. Her eyes seemed to brighten as her mood shifted significantly back to my Charlie.
“How about after bath time we come to the living room and snuggle. Then you can show me and tell me all about your day,” I suggested.
“Okay!”
We continued to eat our meal, occasionally talking about her day and what she and Grandma had planned for the next day. When we finished, I took our plates to the kitchen to begin the cleanup and grabbed Charlie her ice cream. As she ate, I filled the dishwasher and washed the pot and pan.
“Please may I be excused?” she asked from the table.
I looked up and smiled. “Of course. Can you please bring me your bowl?”
Charlie hopped down from the table and cradled her bowl between her hands as she crossed the floor to me. I put the dish in the dishwasher, turned it on and gave the counter one final wipe-down before turning to her. “All right, who's ready for bath time?”
Charlie jumped up and down, raising her arm in the air. “I am! I am!” she squealed. We walked upstairs together and I ran her bath, being sure to add plenty of bubble bath as she got ready and climbed in.
Charlie snatched up her toys and played until it was time to wash her hair. Once she was clean, she played some more until the water was chilled and her fingertips pruned. She pulled the plug as I grabbed her towel, and I bundled her up tightly before pulling her from the tub.
She held her towel tightly as I combed the tangles from her hair and helped her brush her teeth. Once we finished in the bathroom, I walked with her to her room and stood in her doorway.
I bent down until I was face-to-face with her. “All right, now. How about you get into your jammies and I will go and do the same? Then, we'll meet downstairs and look at the pictures you took today. Sound good?”
“Yup!” she exclaimed, darting over to her dresser for her pajamas.
I went off to my room and got ready for bed before heading back down to meet Charlie for our date. When I entered the living room I saw Charlie sitting on the couch dressed in her two-piece blue flannel pajamas. With her back right against the couch, her little legs stuck straight out in front of her, and as I got closer, I saw she had the camera resting on her lap.
I snuggled up next to her as I picked the camera up and turned it on. “Okay, so what are we looking at here?” I asked as I started flipping through the multiple images.
Charlie narrated the entire time we looked at the pictures; my mother wasn't kidding when she said Charlie and Seth had taken hundreds around the house. The pictures were ranging from the fresh flowers on the dining room table, to pictures of Jen reading on the couch in the family room.
We finally got to the zoo pictures and Charlie squirmed excitedly next to me. “Oh! These are the lions, Daddy! They were neat! There was a daddy lion and a bunch of mommy lions and some babies, too!” she exclaimed.
We flipped through the rest of the animals, each one more exciting than the last for her, and I hadn't realized we were at the end of her zoo adventure until I flipped to a picture of Cassie and me sitting at our piano.
In an instant, my mind drifted back to that day; it was one of the last days we were truly happy.
Chapter 3 | Whispered Promises
Cassie had just hoisted a two-year-old Charlie into her arms and carried her upstairs for bed while I stayed downstairs and finished tidying up the toys scattered about the living room. When everything was put away, I sat down at the piano and started playing.
I looked up when I heard Cassie's soft sigh, and I melted inside when she smiled. “I love hearing you play,” she said softly as she crossed the room to me, stopping momentarily to grab the camera from the shelf.
She sat down next to me as I continued to play for her. She pressed a series of buttons and placed the camera on the sleek black wood. She leaned her head on my shoulder and, with a smile, I pressed my lips to her forehead as the camera flashed, capturing that moment forever.
She picked the camera up and flipped it over. “That's a keeper,” she announced.
“Why don't you play anymore, Daddy?” Charlie asked, her tiny voice pulling me out of the beautiful memory.
I sighed, looking over at the piano that sat untouched for the last two and a half years. “I don't know, baby. I guess I've just been too busy.”
She looked up at me with wide, innocent eyes. “Will you play for me tonight?” she pleaded.
I looked over at the clock on the mantle, my gut churning with upset, and then back down at her apologetically. “It's already past your bedtime tonight, sweetie. But, how about we make a date for tomorrow after dinner?”
“Yes! Okay!” she agreed animatedly as she bounded off the couch and rushed toward the stairs.
I followed her to her room and watched as she climbed under her purple comforter and pulled it up under her chin. I moved to her bedside and knelt down, placing a kiss on the top of her head.
“Are you tucked in tight enough?” I asked only to have her nod her reply. “All right, sleep tight, Charlie. I love you.”
“Love you, too, Daddy,” she responded as I moved to the door. She snatched up her stuffed kitten from behind her and snuggled down further into the blankets. I flicked off her lights and pulled the door closed most of the way before heading back downstairs. Being just past eight-thirt
y, I wasn't ready to turn in, plus I still had to wait for Cassie to get home.
I walked into the kitchen and poured myself a glass of wine. As I stood at the island, I eyed the sleek, black baby grand that stood in the far corner and took a drink before heading toward the regal, abandoned instrument. I placed my wine glass on the top of the piano and lifted the fallboard. Eyeing the keys nervously, I took a deep breath and reached out. My fingers gently ghosted over them, familiarizing myself with the smooth surface. Then, without thinking, my fingers pressed down and began to dance fluidly over the ivory, causing melodies to fill the house completely.
As the music took control, I closed my eyes and got lost in the same memory from earlier.
Cassie set the camera back down and tilted her head upward and pressed her lips to mine firmly. The music stopped instantly as I lifted my hands and twisted my fingers into the hair at the nape of her neck, deepening our kiss. With a soft moan against my mouth, Cassie twisted her body closer to mine.
I broke our embrace and scooped her up in my arms, quickly carrying her upstairs to our room where I set her on the bed and pulled her shirt over her head. She began to unbutton my jeans as I pulled my shirt off. With my pants pooled around my ankles, I stepped out of them and leaned forward, capturing her lips once more. As I moved forward, Cassie reclined down onto the bed, and, with one hand, I unfastened her pants and helped her remove them before I hovered over her near naked body.
I pressed my body into hers and she hitched her legs up around my waist as we molded together. Twisting her body, she successfully rolled us over until she was straddling me, and her lips created a delicious trail down my neck and chest while her hair fell in a curtain around her face, tickling my skin on her descent. She continued kissing her way down my body until she was standing at my feet.
I propped myself up on my elbows and looked at her with confusion. “Where do you think you're going?”