by Riley Storm
“No, not really. We’ve, hell I don’t know what we are,” Rane growled. “That’s why I’m here, trying to understand. I’m really confused, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve been attracted to women before, back on Dracia. I’ve been with some, I’ve had relationships. But this…Damien, this is something else. I’ve never felt like this. Something is physically pulling me to be closer to her, and it gets stronger every day.”
“And it will,” Damien explained. “It will grow stronger and stronger, until the both of you accept what you have, accept each other, and then, and only then, will it blossom into something else, into what Anna and I have now. But you can’t force it; it has to happen on its own.”
“Yeah.” Rane looked down. “I’m not sure she’s ever going to get to that point.”
Damien was silent for a moment. “I wish I could help you out more with that, my friend. To guide you… but to my understanding, this has never happened before. I thought…” he laughed. “I honestly thought I was slightly crazy. Even though Anna said she felt it too, I’ve never heard of this happening to dragons before, so I didn’t—I still don’t—know what it means.”
“Anna felt it too?” Rane asked with a sliver of hope.
“Yes. She hid it well, tried to fight it, even, but eventually she confessed to me she felt the same. Just before we took on the Infected, you remember.”
Rane nodded, gaining new perspective on the things he’d seen between Damien and Anna. He hadn’t really known that the other shifter felt this pull as well, something that he could feel, but couldn’t identify.
“So, it’s something about the humans that is doing this then?” Rane asked. “Is this how they know who to pair up with?”
Damien shook his head. “No, Anna had no understanding of it either. She was confused and scared because of how strong it was.”
“I see.” Rane ran a hand over his head, feeling the buzz of his short hair as it rippled across his palm. “I think. Thanks.”
Damien got up and patted him on the shoulder. “It’s confusing. Don’t stress over that. If you’re feeling it, I feel like she is too.”
“Yeah.” Rane nodded. That would make sense. He’d picked up on some odd things at the edges of her emotions, slight reactions and facial expressions that hadn’t always completely lined up with what she was saying. Perhaps that was because of this force, this linking between them. She could be just as confused as he was. Is.
Rane was definitely still confused by it all, but at least now he had some reassurance that he wasn’t losing his mind.
“Just let things happen,” Damien urged. “Go with the flow with them, don’t force anything, don’t try to push it. Let it happen at its own pace, in whatever way it’s supposed to happen, you know? If you try to make it happen, she’s probably going to push back, to pull away. You just have to let it work itself out.”
“Easier said than done,” he joked, earning himself a laugh from Damien. “You’re right there. But if this is the same thing, then that’s the best way to go about it.”
“Okay. Thanks.”
He departed, heading back out into the hallways, his thoughts full of new perspective.
Just let it happen. Don’t force anything. Stay calm.
Don’t do anything stupid, and everything will be just fine.
Chapter Seventeen
Natasha
She packed up her things from class, trying to ignore the empty pages on her notebook and the questioning stares from her professor.
“Everything okay, Natasha?” Master Pinton asked as she headed for the door.
“Yeah, just having one of those days, you know?” Natasha said lightly, trying to play it off as nothing, hoping that would let her pass.
“Oh yes of course. We all have those. Take care.”
Natasha sighed in relief as she exited. Four people in the class, it hadn’t been exactly hard for Pinton to notice that Natasha had been mentally absent for the entire thing. Thankfully, Pinton was one of the kindest old witches Natasha had ever met, and she understood that sometimes, class just wasn’t what the mind focused on.
Which worked well for Natasha now, but could be tough on the days that it was the Master’s mind that wandered while lecturing. There were some things that just shouldn’t be shared…
Hurrying out of class, she headed straight for her room, thankful that her roommate had left on patrol that morning. What Natasha craved more than anything, what she’d been striving to have since fleeing Loiner, was to be alone. It was why she’d stayed in her room, avoiding the world until class today forced her out.
No friends, no social life, and most certainly no Rane. It had been a day and a half since she’d left him in the alleyway.
And it feels like an eternity.
But she couldn’t see him, not right now. Possibly not anymore. Every time he came up in her thoughts, it was the same thing, over and over again.
Rane would be there, and things would be going well, and then Loiner’s face would materialize in her mind.
Once he takes you to bed, it will be easy for you to get his secret out.
Natasha shivered as she climbed the stairs toward the dormitories and her sanctuary for the next day or so until her roommate returned. Others passed her in the stairwell, but she replied with little more than a smile or nod, not wanting to get dragged into any conversation.
She hated the way Loiner had assumed Natasha was using her body as part of the quest to find out what the dragons were up to. The idea of sleeping with Rane, of taking things to another level, hadn’t been foreign to her. In fact, ever since he’d spontaneously kissed her at the foot of the walls after fighting off the gremlins, she’d entertained a little fantasy of what that would be like.
After all, he was quite attractive. Tall, wide shoulders, taut muscle covering him from head to toe. A surprisingly good kisser as well, and she’d wondered how that might translate to…other things. Was he as attentive a lover as he seemed to be a person? If so, with that body…
Even now, in the stairway, her cheeks were growing heated.
Once he takes you to bed…
And there it was. Loiner, intruding on what, until that night, had been a fun little fantasy of Natasha’s. Maybe it would have happened, maybe it wouldn’t.
Now though, it was no longer a physical or emotional desire—if it had ever been the latter. Now it was nothing but a disgusting reminder of the way she had first gotten to know Rane. Of the fact that their friendship, relationship, whatever it had been, or still was, had been based on a lie. Her lie, in fact.
Natasha was repulsed at what she had done, how she’d used such a good person, manipulated him, pretending to be his friend, to like him. Then, at some point, her pretending had morphed into reality, and she’d found herself caring for him.
It gave Loiner all the leverage over her that she needed to keep forcing Natasha to do what she wanted. Because if she didn’t, then Loiner would tell Rane the truth, and she wasn’t sure she could handle that. Nor did Rane deserve it.
Loiner had terrified Natasha before, but now…now it was worse. Plus, how was she to sleep with Rane, when the entire time she’d only be thinking of Loiner? If the two of them were to have sex, it would be because Natasha chose to, not because she was forced to, by anyone.
“This is getting out of hand,” she moaned softly to herself, exiting the stairs on her floor and heading straight for her room.
The instant the door closed behind her, she dropped her stuff on a chair and fell face first into the pillow, ignoring the slight pain to her nose from the impact. She deserved some pain right now, Natasha was sure. A slight bump from her face hitting the pillow was nothing.
“How do I fix this?” she said to the empty room. There had to be some way that she could sort this all out, to make things better between her and Rane without Loiner trying to fire Natasha into the sun for ruining her plans.
If there was, she couldn’t spot it. Loiner had her t
rapped. She either went ahead with the plan, or Loiner would reveal the truth.
Unless…
Natasha sighed as a realization came to her. A truth, a course of action she could take, that would foil Loiner and prevent things from getting worse. It wouldn’t be pleasant, and she didn’t look forward to the conversation, but it would make—
Knock-knock.
She sat upright at the heavy hand on her door. The wood rattled in its frame under the casual impact. Natasha frowned at the door, knowing that no witch could so casually make such thunderous noise.
“Aw fuck,” she cursed in an uncharacteristic outburst. Natasha wasn’t ready to have the conversation now, but it appeared life wasn’t giving her a choice. Perhaps this was her penance for being an absolutely horrid person toward Rane at first, even if he didn’t know it.
She walked toward the door and pulled it open, not even flinching when she saw Rane standing on the other side.
“Hi,” he said with a smile.
“Hi.”
They stood like that, him in the hallway, witches moving past, giving the two of them odd looks. Eventually, Rane leaned to the side, looking past her into the room. “Are you coming out? Or can I come in?”
Natasha took a deep breath. This was it. Right now, right here. It was the only way out. The only way she could possibly foil what Loiner was trying to do.
“I don’t know if that would be a good idea,” she said tightly.
Rane stiffened in surprise. He recognized her tone.
Natasha didn’t want to go through with this. She didn’t want to hurt him, but this hurt now would be worse than the hurt Loiner would inflict upon him. It had to be this way.
“That doesn’t sound good,” Rane said, speaking just loud enough for her to hear.
She nodded, biting her lip, searching for the best selection of words and then realizing that in this situation, none of them were good. It was best just to rip the bandage off, not to try and gently peel it.
“I don’t know what ‘this’ is,” she said, feeling stiff and formal as she pointed back and forth between the two of them. “But I can’t do it anymore, Rane.”
“Oh. I have to admit, I did not see that coming,” he said, rocking back slightly on his heels.
“I’m sorry,” she said, meaning every ounce of the phrase, more than he would ever know. “I truly am, but I just, it’s for the best that we stop this. I can’t see you anymore.”
The mixture of pain and confusion in his eyes and on his face nearly made Natasha recant right then and there. She almost confessed the truth, telling him how she really felt, instead of doing what she knew had to be done.
“I wish things had perhaps happened differently,” she said, coming as close as she was comfortable to admitting that she’d not been upfront with him. “But it didn’t, and I can’t change that, and I just…I just need to stop this. Before anyone gets more hurt, okay?” She was practically pleading with him now, begging for his acceptance of what she was doing.
“Natasha, I don’t understand,” he said, spreading his hands wide, trying to catch her eyes in his, but she wouldn’t let him.
Natasha knew that if she saw the hurt, focused on it for too long, she might not be able to resist.
This is for your own good, Rane. Please, just accept it.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “It’s for me. It’s just not something I can do right now. You can’t understand unless you’re me. I know that’s absolutely no help, but I’m not going to explain everything in my mind and my heart. I just know that this is what I need to do,” she said, stepping back slightly into her room, putting one hand on the door.
Rane looked like he’d been stabbed through the stomach. “Oh.”
She nodded, not trusting herself with any words as her eyes started to tear up, showing Natasha just how little she wanted this. Most of her was screaming out right now, protesting what she was doing, telling her it was the wrong with a strength that scared her.
She’d known she liked Rane, but now things were hitting her with excessive strength, and she was losing her composure.
“Please,” she said. “You need to go. I’m sorry.”
The big dragon looked down at the floor. She saw his tongue flick out over his lips as he drew a shuddering breath.
“Okay,” Rane said, straightening, looking utterly lost. “I’ll go.”
Then he was gone. The bandage was ripped off. It should be getting better now.
So why didn’t she feel any better?
Chapter Eighteen
Rane
It was late that night before Rane returned to the dragon quarter.
His soul was in pain in a way he’d never experienced before. Heartache, rejection and sadness were emotions he’d experienced and which were familiar to him. But this soul-wrenching agony knifed at him deeper than anything he’d ever experienced before.
After he’d stumbled away from her room, he’d gone to the top of the walls, to the place the two of them had first met. There, he’d spent hours looking out over the crenellations into the valley beyond, wondering just what it was he’d done wrong, where he had erred.
In all that time, nothing had come to him. There was a piece to this puzzle that he simply wasn’t aware of, and it didn’t seem like Natasha had any intentions of cluing him in either. It couldn’t be another of the dragons, as he would have seen that or heard about it, he was positive.
Could it be one of the other witches?
Rane had seen several witches who seemed more than just friends with one another. None of the others batted an eye at it, and so neither had he. It made sense; they were confined amongst their own kind, which as the dragons had learned were almost all women.
Male sorcerers, it seemed, were exceedingly rare, and there weren’t any at Winterspell. Like the dragons, humans needed companionship, company and they tended to pair up and form a romantic relationship with one other person at a time. Just another sign that there were similarities between the two that were more than just appearance-based.
Not that Rane cared a lick about that right then. He was hurting, and he didn’t know how to make it stop. Wandering up the stairs to his level, he moved as if in a dream. None of it felt real.
Damien had told him that all he had to do was play it cool, that everything would be okay as long as he didn’t force it.
But Damien had been wrong. Things had gone horribly awry for no apparent reason. Whatever had happened between Anna and the other storm dragon did not seem to apply to Rane and Natasha. Things were different, and he needed to figure out how.
“Except, trying to figure out how would be forcing it,” he muttered, rehashing the same dilemma he’d been having all day. If he tried to figure it out, to push Natasha on what was bothering her, he ran the risk of screwing things up even worse.
Can they be screwed up worse? She already kinda sorta dumped me, didn’t she? How much worse can it get?
Rane’s thoughts were interrupted as he cleared the last stair. The hallway beyond exploded with light as a lightning bolt shot down its length and flung him back down the stairwell.
His body bounced off the stone wall hard enough to crack it, stone and mortar dust falling away as he rebounded off, hit the stairs, rolled half a dozen times and came to a halt a story and a half below.
“Ow,” was all he could conjure as he stood up.
Air wheezed out of his now bruised lungs, but everything seemed to be in working order. Nothing was broken. A multitude of scrapes, but nothing that seemed serious. No spurting blood or extreme pain. Nothing protruding from his body. He was good.
“What the fuck!” he shouted, storming back up the stairs. “That had better have been a wild coincidence of someone practicing something, or I’m gonna lay you out!” he raged.
An odd moan filled the hallway as he eased his head back over the last step, looking for whoever had hit him. It was empty. Whoever had been there had moved on. The noise grew louder, ec
hoing down the stone with an eerie rise and fall.
“What is going on?’ he growled, moving into the corridor.
Lightning slashed through the T-junction of two hallways up ahead.
“Stop! Stop, don’t!”
Rane heard the voice, thinking it sounded familiar, but he couldn’t place it. Nobody cried out or shouted from the attack, but that didn’t mean someone hadn’t been hurt. He rushed forward, looking left to where the strike had come from, but again, it was empty.
Behind him a short way down the hallway, a wall smoked and was blackened from where the strike had gone home.
Someone was attacking the dragons.
Rane turned to head back the way he’d come when he saw someone come around the corner.
“Altair!” he cried. “Be careful, someone is in here attacking us.”
But the other dragon just looked at him, his eyes blank. Shaking his head, Altair moaned, and the sound filled the hallways again. Then his arm came up and lightning flickered.
“Altair, what are you doing? What’s going on?” Rane called, glancing over his shoulder in case someone was coming up behind him.
The hallway was empty.
“Don’t go that way,” Altair cried. “Don’t do it. We have to go. Run. They’re coming. They’re coming over the walls. Everybody run.”
Rane frowned at his friend. “What are you talking about, Altair? Nothing’s happening.”
Lightning erupted from the storm dragon’s palm. This time, Rane was ready for it though, and he caught the blast, focusing his mind, absorbing the energy, grounding it out. It wasn’t all that pleasant, but it was better than someone getting caught in the crossfire. It was only a matter of time before someone stuck their face out into the hallway and got burned.
He had to end this.
“Don’t!” Altair screamed. “No. Please. Oh no, not again. They got the little ones. They got the babies!” Lightning flashed, but again Rane was ready.
Up ahead in the hallway, a door opened and two young faces peered out. Dragon young.
“Get back in your room!” Rane hissed, but it was too late. Altair had noticed.