by Emma Sutton
“You want to watch the stars for a bit?” I ask, climbing from the truck and meeting her at the passenger side door so I can help her down.
“That sounds perfect.” Without another word, she pushes the styrofoam box from The Sundry into my hands.
Tracing the truck back around to the bed, I open the hatch so Sophie can hop out. “Hey, I have an idea. What’s your favorite flavor— orange, grape, or cherry?”
“Cherry,” she smiles.
“Okay, wait here. I’ll just be a minute.”
Inside the house, I toss the leftovers into the refrigerator and wash my hands clean. Running them through my hair that’s still damp, too, I try to make myself look a little more presentable even though it’s likely she can hardly see me outside in the dark of summer twilight.
Reaching for the freezer, I grab two popsicles, one orange and one cherry. After flicking off the porch light and shutting the front door behind me, I find the silhouette of Hattie sitting on the open tailgate. She crosses her ankles and lets her bare legs dangle in the heat of the night.
“Did you mean what you said back there at the restaurant? About me being your girlfriend?” she suddenly asks.
I stand in front of her with the two popsicles in hand, the wrappers already removed. Chuckling at how surprised she’d looked right after I used the word with Alexis, I nod. “I meant it.”
“How much did you mean it?” she purrs, clearly teasing me now. “Twenty percent?”
“I meant it two-thousand percent,” I say, feeling like the most fortunate man on this planet.
She laughs, her tone ringing out like the sound of a bell. “That’s a lot of percents.”
“You’re worth all the percents I have to give,” I tell her, meaning that, too. “Here.” I hand her the cherry popsicle. “To us,” I say, holding my orange popsicle up in front of her.
“To us,” she whispers just before tapping her icy treat to mine. “To this,” she hums, that hushed voice of hers driving me wild as she plants her thumb on my chin and leads my eager mouth to hers.
With me standing and her sitting on the bed of the truck, we meet eye level now. As she kisses me, sweet and solemn as ever, I can’t help but want more with her. And it seems like, especially lately, at least when it comes to her, I’m always craving more.
As her free hand finds its way to the back of my hair, I bathe in her generous presence and capture her lips in mine as we continue to kiss deeper. I feel a silver-white volt of current rise in me, a heat I haven’t felt in this lifetime. Something cosmic. As if sitting out here together, we’re part of the starlit sky ourselves, shifting closer to one another like two mountains colliding.
When she pulls back and pops the treat into her mouth, I can’t help but groan. “You are amazing,” I tell her as I hoist myself up next to her on the bed of the truck.
“Me? I’m just here for the popsicle,” she teases with a shrug. She lays her head on my shoulder.
We sit in silence for a few minutes, devouring our melting treats. We listen to the clicking sea of crickets and the cyclical cicadas crying throughout the woods behind my house. Sophie lies on the deck a good few yards from us, apparently tuckered out from today’s travels across the ranch topped off by a cool bath. And in this moment of sensuous bliss, a part of me is convinced I could live nights like this with Hattie by my side for the rest of my life.
“Detective Lansing called me the other night,” she suddenly says, breaking my trance. “Last week.”
“Oh, yeah.” Remembering the call she’d received at the fire pit, I immediately wonder why she hadn’t mentioned it until now. “What’d he have to say?”
After a few moments of quiet, she lifts her head and looks down at her hands. “My birth mother died.”
Even in the heat, the shock of her news puts a chill down me. “I’m sorry, Hattie. I didn’t know or else—”
“I didn't tell anyone. Not even MJ.”
Wrapping my arm around her back, I pull her close and press my face to her drying hair. She smells like vanilla again with a hint of cherry. Why hadn’t she said anything about the news sooner? I hate that she’d been ruminating about it all on her own. Pressing a kiss to her hair, I whisper low. “Are you okay?”
She nods her head against me and relaxes into my grip.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not really. I’m just—” she sighs and puts more of her weight on me. “I’m glad I don’t have to go through the rest of my life worrying about why or how or if she’d ever change her mind about wanting to meet me. That option is permanently off the table now.”
I press my cheek to the top of her hair to let her know I’m here. “Thank you for telling me,” I say, knowing that she’s not interested in diving into the details right now.
“Thank you for always listening,” she counters.
I kiss her on top of the head for the third time and revel in the fact that I get to have her all to myself. This has been such a fulfilling night that I almost don’t want it to end, especially on the bitter note of the news of her mother.
“Do you think your friend will really come to work here?” Hattie lifts her head, giving me a clear shot of her cornflower blue eyes in the dark. “Alexis?”
“I’m not sure about that one. There’d be a lot to iron out. But MJ is finally open to the idea of sprinkling a little marketing strategy into the mix, so I’m running with it while she’s on board.”
“Is the ranch really in that much trouble? To need someone full time?”
Not able to spill the specifics, I don’t want to worry her any more than the pain she’s probably already carrying right now under the weight of her news. “I don’t want you to worry about it just yet,” I say, wishing I could protect her from all the bad things of the world— especially the prospect of everyone losing their jobs in the span of a few short months. “We’ll all get through it together.”
“You’re right.”
“Oh, am I?” I tease. Somehow, among all the potential horrors of the ranch fizzling out into nothing and the devastation that scenario would bring across the thousands of acres of MJ’s land, I can’t help but smile at Hattie. “I guess there’s a first time for everything then, isn’t there? Me finally being right and all.”
“Nope. Not even close, buddy.”
“Oh, really? What else have I been right about?”
Staring at me, she cocks her head to the left and waits for me to formulate a guess, but I have none. Finally, she presses her lips to mine for a quick kiss and whispers. “Because I am a handful, remember?”
Just like that, in this very moment, I suddenly realize from the bottom of my soul that I’ll do anything I can to keep Hattie Handful in my life from here on out.
Chapter Sixteen
Hattie
“Serving!” Lennon shouts from her spot on the service line. The lot of us are situated on the warm sand of the Flats, waiting for her to sail the ball.
I bend my knees and ready my hands. With a sudden POP, the volleyball whizzes right overtop our heads and clears the net.
Jordan grunts from the other side of the court as he leaps up and smacks the ball, volleying it back over the net that’s a little too loose today as it sways on the breeze.
We get together as co-ed teams to play a friendly but competitive game of volleyball every other week. Most of the people who play with us live on the ranch, but the few staff who live off-site also join in for some fun. It’s something to keep our morale up, and Mary Jo loves encouraging camaraderie among the entire crew.
Watching our game, Mary Jo sits under an umbrella on one of the picnic benches with two dogs at her feet— Woodford the Golden Retriever and Oliver the Corgi.
Before I know it, the ball is headed right back in my direction.
“Got it!” Grace calls from my left. She bumps it right above me, setting it in the air.
With all the might I can muster, I jump as high as I can and land the heel of m
y palm on the ball, sailing it over the net as it nearly dips into the sand on their side of the court.
“Hey! You comin’ in anytime soon?” I suddenly hear Mason shout to Walker who treads the grass in a T-shirt and athletic shorts. He hunkers down on the bench next to MJ.
“Yeah, give me a minute,” he shouts back, his legs much whiter than his arms due to his constant wearing of long pants in the scorching sun while he works.
After another two serves, I can’t help but glance over at Walker and MJ. It looks like they’re deep in discussion, and I wonder if it’s not regarding whatever kind of care in which the ranch seems to be right now.
Eliza squeals out into the hot breeze as she ducks, nearly catching the ball with her face. Her smooth move causes us all to fall into a sweet fit of laughter. But one more look over at Mason tells me he’s just as worried about Walker’s lack of involvement in today’s game as I am.
I try to focus on the next few plays, but it’s hard to peel my mind from Walker. We hadn’t told anyone that we were, as of last week, officially seeing each other. Seriously now— as boyfriend and girlfriend.
With Georgia and Eliza both watching me like a hawk, I’d already let them in on the secret about our first kiss. But the more Walker and I found ourselves near each other out in the open of the ranch with our people, I’d come to realize just how self-conscious I was becoming regarding letting the rest of the crew in the know about our relationship. I hadn’t experienced anything like this in such a long time— if ever— and for now, I want to keep that strong and significant feeling all to myself.
The volleyball game lasts only twenty-five more minutes, and with Walker never joining his team, a pit of dread rises in my stomach.
Something must be wrong.
“Guys,” Walker calls out to all of us once everyone starts finishing up the game.
I slip my bare feet into my sandals and buckle them as Walker continues trying to get everyone’s attention.
“Can everyone come over here for a minute, please?”
My heart plummets in my chest. I grab my water bottle from where I left it on the grass by the sideline and sip from it as everyone gathers around where MJ and Walker convene.
“Mary Jo has something she wants to say. So please listen up.”
“Hi, my friends.” She pats the air and smiles, clearly admiring all of our sweaty faces. “Do you all know how much I cherish you being here?”
The entire group of us nods and answers in a resounding yes.
“And we love you, too, MJ,” Mason adds.
The crowd grows even quieter, all forty or so of us full of nerves for whatever kind of knowledge Mary Jo’s about to spill in our laps.
She clasps her hands in front of her and fights an audible bout of tears.
Looking over, I notice Walker stands next to her with his jaw completely set.
“As you all know,” MJ starts, “This has been a trying few years for us without Charles to lead us home. But I want you to know we’re working very hard without him. We are going through some tricky financial times right now, but we will rise out of this.”
I turn my gaze back to Walker as Mary Jo continues. His eyes cut to me for a split-second before they dart off to someone else’s face in the crowd, and I wonder if he’s not feeling some kind of humiliation or shame.
A wave of fear claws through me as I realize how much stress Walker has had on his shoulders all this time. And never once did he say a thing about it being this serious.
“We have plans in place to keep the ranch alive and running, so I don’t want a single one of you to throw in the towel just yet. We need your support, your love, your good faith, your happiness, and your overall being here on this land. Every single one of you.” She points a fierce finger.
I swallow hard, the emotion MJ’s choking back right now rising in the back of my own throat like I own it.
“We will get through this just as we’ve gotten through every other issue that’s come up while keeping Lone Oak alive. We won’t back down, and I hope that, now that I’m making you aware, you won’t either. I just—” MJ glances over at Walker and holds a hand out to him.
Grabbing her hand, he forces a smile before yanking his hat down over his eyes.
“I just don’t want you all to think I’m keeping anything from you. It’s not about keeping you in the dark. So that’s where we are right now, and we’re planning to head up from here. Okay?”
“Okay,” I whisper in the chorus of everyone else.
“Alright,” she says, reclaiming her hand from Walker and waving everyone else away like they’re gnats bound for higher glory. “Go enjoy your nights. Dinner should be ready in the cafe by now.”
As the crowd disperses and we all take off in our own directions like a freshly devastated hill of Yellow Meadow ants, I spot Walker heading on foot up the gravel road.
Eliza hooks her sweaty arm through mine as she sighs. “What was that all about?”
“I don’t know,” I say, not really interested in chatting as I’d rather make sure Walker is okay. “Hey, I’ll be right back,” I tell her as I free my arm and jog ahead to catch up with my boyfriend.
It takes a few seconds due to his pace, but I finally reach him as he turns the corner to Dusk Road.
“You’re gonna miss supper,” he says, glancing over his shoulder but not stopping or slowing himself. He must’ve heard my footsteps in the gravel.
“Can I eat with you?” I ask, suddenly wanting a repeat of the past two nights we’d spent hanging out together at his place. “I’ll cook tonight. Spaghetti?”
“No,” he says with a single shake of his, still walking. The gravel continues to crunch under his tennis shoes. “I need to finish up work.”
Confused as to what he could still possibly need to do with daylight nearly vanished, I furrow my brow and try to keep up with him. “What do you have left? Maybe I can help.”
“You can’t, Hattie. I need to make some phone calls.”
“Okay.” I swallow hard and try to catch my breath. “Can I meet you after you’re done?”
“At this point,” he says, yanking his hat down lower, “I don’t know.”
“So this is it then?” I ask, his attitude now settling low in me like a bitter venom as I feel like the past three weeks of us growing closer in all the intimately beautiful ways come crashing down around me. “This is who we are now? You can’t even stop to talk for a second?”
Hearing my plea, Walker halts dead in his tracks and turns on his heel, his shoulders now slumped. “I’m sorry, Hattie. This is my fault.” He slides a hand underneath my hair and onto the back of my hot neck, pulling me toward him. Kissing me quick on the lips, he brushes a flyaway piece of hair from my face. “I’ll call you when I’m done for the night.”
“Okay,” I whisper, not sure what I’ve done to cause this in him.
I hear a sharp whistle from behind me. Catching both of our eyes, we spot Mason and Grace congregating fifty yards in the direction of the cafe.
“You got it!” Mason shouts with a grin on his face.
Without a word, Walker turns and takes off marching straight toward the cattle barn with hands shoved in his pockets, his head hung low, and his pride seemingly nonexistent. And just like that, he’s gone.
Later in the night, I sit with Eliza, Jess, Mason, Brooke, and Lennon by the fire. The stars are out again in full force, dazzling under the velvet sky as the warmth of the fire keeps the night bugs at bay.
I balance my cell phone on my knee in hopes that Walker will call, but my phone never lights up with any sort of sign of him. I make a point to check every five minutes or so as I listen in on a conversation about one of the difficult guests Eliza and Jess both had to work with today.
“Did you see her?” Jess asks, turning to me. “She was the one wearing the floral blouse during riding lessons.”
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I must have missed it.”
After that, I
keep to myself and stare at the flames that are lapping up the Wyoming night.
It’s not until about ten o’clock that I come to the realization that Walker won’t be calling tonight.
As the girls continue to discuss the future of the ranch and Mason works to ruminate what Mary Jo’s message could actually mean for all of us, a strong realization overtakes me.
If Lone Oak Ranch shuts down, I’ll probably never see Walker again. The only reason I’d moved to Wyoming in the first place was to work at The Reinholdt’s ranch. And now if that’s taken off the table, I don’t know what would happen. Is that what Walker was imagining, too? Is that why he was so cold with me today?
As I jog my brain and play out the circumstances, I can’t shake the feeling that the looming fallout would be catastrophic enough to end us.
Could I live without ever seeing Walker again? Could I survive without talking to him and being able to open up to him like I’d miraculously been able to do over the past month? Though I hadn’t exactly said the specific words to him yet, there’s no denying that I’ve grown to love him something fierce. Could I endure knowing such a deep type of love and then having it ripped from me so instantly?
As I stare at the fire and fight the turmoil that wells up in my insides, I close my eyes tight and acknowledge what I need to do in order to keep myself safe from any further type of hurt here until I know, for good, the future of Lone Oak.
Chapter Seventeen
Walker
Parking the four-wheeler out of the way, I flip my hat off and wipe my hairline on the sleeve of my shirt. The blistering sun hangs low in the sky this afternoon and beats down on the ranch, smothering everything within its reach.
Pulling my hat back down over my sweaty hair, I cross the dirt to the riding ring and hang my arms over the fence.