by TK Lawyer
No need, he called after her disappearing form as she rounded the kitchen to put the sunflower into a vase. I left my bag the last time I was here. They locked eyes across the room, neither one wanting to address the reason for Josh’s long absence.
It’s in one of your rooms. If you close the door behind me, I can change.
Tamara stood in the hallway outside the spare bedroom. How and when had he managed to bring extra clothes with him, and why? What else had he brought into her home? When did he change into clothes? He must’ve changed into them when she was gone, most likely at work.
She chuckled, wondering what else he’d been up to while she was away.
Wait a minute…
She widened her eyes while her thoughts raced with several vivid scenarios ranging from innocent to downright triple-X raunchy.
She imagined a series of ménage-a-trois occurring in her bed. On her couches, on the floor, and even on the kitchen tile.
The kitchen tile!
She squeaked excitedly. At the time, Nightfall’s body over hers on the kitchen tile was weird and uncomfortable, but things were different now.
“Almost done,” he called to her from the other room.
“Josh, what exactly did you do while I was at work?”
The door creaked opened, and his head popped out. Josh stood at the threshold, wearing a blue T-shirt, striped sleep pants, and an amused grin on his face. “What do you think I did, Tamara?”
She rested her hands on her hips. “I don’t even want to think it. I want to hear from you directly. So, what did you do while I was gone, Josh?”
The corners of his eyes crinkled, and his mouth formed into a sly grin. He rubbed his chin and snorted. “You think I was up to no good, right?”
She pursed her lips and shook her head despite the nagging sensation in her gut making her almost queasy with the endless possibilities flowing through her mind.
“I would love to keep you on your toes and indulge in your fantasies, but I’m sorry to disappoint. I’m actually pretty boring. I watched some TV, made a couple of sandwiches, but mostly I waited for you to come home. However, I did shower here a couple of times.”
She covered her mouth to conceal a laugh. “Oh, so that’s where the extra towels came from.”
Josh nodded.
“So…” Her teeth grazed her bottom lip. “You really didn’t do anything else?”
Please say no; please say no. Please, don’t be like past boyfriends who lied to me and left.
Josh chuckled gently. “No, Tamara. Honestly, that’s all I did. However, I did walk into your bedroom a couple of times to delight in your scent.”
She eyed him quizzically.
“I promise, just the bedsheets and your pillow. I couldn’t help it. Your scent does something to me.”
“Oh…” Her curiosity piqued. “What does it do, exactly?”
Tamara held her breath and prepared for anything. If she were dangerously toeing a line she shouldn’t cross, she’d know soon enough. However, she wanted to know everything about Josh, even if there were something things she didn’t want to hear.
He lifted his head in response to her question, and his blackened irises widened. “For lack of a better term, your scent excites me.”
“Oh…oh my.”
His direct answer stunned her for several long seconds. She slapped a hand over her mouth and stepped back as a warm sensation rushed over her body. There was no mistaking the desire in his eyes. She teetered on her heel and backed up against a nearby wall. Tamara glanced up at him and found his marked desire again. The fact that this amazing man found her attractive still seemed impossible. Did he realize she was a large woman? Not many men cared for plus-sized girls. In fact, several ex-lovers from her past told her exactly how unwanted she was after they played on her heart.
Josh’s hard stare was uncomfortable, but exciting, too; it was proof of his attraction. Even so, she felt like there was a bright-red target on her chest in front of a skilled, determined hunter. She blushed from his attention and turned away to calm her nervousness.
Josh was curiously silent. He looked concerned, and possibly pained by something. His sudden groan alarmed her. She moved swiftly, scurrying back across the wall when he caught her.
“Where are you going?” His tone was gruff.
Her voice heightened in pitch, but remained firm. “Josh, I asked you to be a gentleman, and that’s what I expect.”
She needed this from him even if her mind was busily creating a scandalous mental image of them intertwined in her bed again. She grazed her teeth across her lower lip again.
Josh lowered his eyelids to slits and shifted focus onto her lips. “What are you thinking, Tamara?”
“What are you thinking?” she fired back.
They stared at one another and smiled.
She was the first one to break the silence. “You’re welcome to sleep on the couch if you like. I’d rather you stay inside rather than the doorstep. Besides, I’d feel safer if you were close. That’s is, if you’re okay with this arrangement.”
Josh set his jaw determinedly. “How long will this continue, Tamara?”
Her eyebrows puckered. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, what do you expect to get out of this? Where do you want this to go?”
“I-I don’t know.”
She broke their gaze and glanced over to the side. The truth was, she wanted to get to know him. She wanted to explore the possibility of romance, but she didn’t want either of them to get hurt.
In the end, she decided to be honest. “I guess I want to get to know you better. Would it be okay if we take it slow? You’d be free to come and go, I’d even give you a key to the house. I want to move forward, but without rushing into anything.”
Josh might not think it was much, but she was actually offering him a lot. Would he take it? She didn’t want to lose him.
“I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to, Josh. I just want to figure this out together.”
Josh placed his hands on her shoulders and interrupted her. “Tamara, it’s okay. Did I say anything?”
“I’m sorry, I’m babbling. It’s just I don’t know what to do with someone like…”
He raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”
“You know what I mean, a shape-shifter. Part wolf, part human, kind of, if that’s what you are, that is.”
Josh laughed. “You’re cute, Tamara, but I think it’s time I tell you my story.”
He clasped her hand in his and led her to the couch. He lifted her hand up, paused, and dropped it onto his thigh.
“It’s okay if you want to kiss my hand,” Tamara told him. “That’s what you were trying to do, right?”
He grabbed her hand and kissed the back of it. “I’m trying to be a perfect gentleman like you expect me to be, but it’s hard, sometimes.”
“Well, you don’t have to be so perfect.”
Josh grinned. “Oh? I’ll keep that in mind.” He cleared his throat. “Well, let’s see…my father was a purebred wolf, and my mother was human. They were one of several human-wolf relationships in their pack. It’s a best-kept secret among wolves, but it’s possible. I don’t understand why, but when wolves find their human mates, it’s usually successful and meant to be. The main challenge is to convince the human being in the relationship of the supernatural, genuine bond.”
“So, are you like a shape-shifter or something?”
“Kind of, but a shape-shifter can shift into several different forms. I change back into my original form. I am a wolf, and I come from a long line of them. The good part is, unlike TV shows, I don’t feel pain when I change. I can also change into my wolf anytime I want to, not just on a full moon.” He watched her eyes for understanding. “The full moon, though, is magical. It pulls and draws me in to release my wolf. It’s like a rebirthing, a shedding of the façade of my outer layer, and it feels wonderful. It’s also something that’s beyond my contro
l. The change happens every full moon, whether I want it or not, though I can somewhat control when I change during the full moon.”
He paused for a moment, looking over at her to gauge Tamara’s reaction.
“Tamara, by telling you all this, I’m trusting you to share our secret with no one.”
“Of course. I wouldn’t betray your trust. You and I have something special.”
“Yes, we do,” Josh agreed. “It’s the natural effect of being life mates. We date throughout our lives just like anyone else, but there is one and only one life mate for each of us. No one truly understands why it occurs, but wolves find them by their scent—just like I did you.”
He stopped, sniffed into the air, and looked at her hungrily. Tamara’s throat went dry.
“I’ve never lusted for anyone’s scent before. Yours is intoxicating and somehow it completes me. I can’t explain it. It’s just a feeling I have deep in my gut when I’m around you. I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that you are the one for me. There’s no mistaking it. The life mate of each wolf also feels strangely drawn. It’s an intense, magnetic attraction—a feeling, unlike any other. I will protect you at all costs, even if it ends up in my demise.”
Her eyes widened. “But Josh, I wouldn’t want you to die. I wouldn’t want that at all.”
“I’m only explaining the depth of my affection when I tell you you’re my life mate.” He inhaled and sighed. “Do you feel it? Do you feel the same way I do? Tell me. I’ve been dying to ask you that for months now.”
Tamara chuckled nervously. “Well…I can’t say I feel exactly the way you do, but I do feel oddly at peace. I know I can trust you implicitly, but I can’t explain why. I’ve taken several chances, knowing you wouldn’t harm me even though you are, essentially, a stranger to me. I’d never do this with anyone else. I can also picture a future with you, though…” She hesitated before continuing. “Frankly, I’m afraid.”
He intertwined their fingers and asked her gently, “Of what? What are you afraid of?”
Tamara carefully pulled her hand away from him, but Josh retrieved it and held it firmly in his grip. “Well, my relationships in the past haven’t turned out so well. In fact, they were terrible. Now that you’re here I see the potential for a real future, but that’s also scary because if I open myself up again, I’m also opening myself to heartbreak. What we have is so perfect, and I don’t want to risk losing that. It’s all happening too fast, I haven’t had time to process all of it. That’s why I asked if we could take it slow.”
He closed his eyes and smiled. “I understand. I don’t want to rush you either, as long as I know that we’re both on the same path we can take all the time you need.”
Tamara exhaled in relief. “I still don’t understand how I can feel this way so soon. We haven’t even been together that long and already I feel connected to you.”
“That’s just the way it works,” he told her. “I don’t understand it completely either, I just know what I feel. I know that we are meant to be together.”
“What about the way we communicate? The…telepathy.”
Josh squeezed her fingers gently. “That surprised me also. Some wolves are able to do that. My father could, but my mother didn’t know how to receive the messages, or relay any back to him. I was surprised when you were able to hear me. I’ve been trying to figure out why and how, but I think you can hear me because you have abilities you’re unaware of.”
Tamara shook her head in disbelief. “I don’t even want to think about that.”
His thumb drew soothing circles on the back of her hand as he gazed into her eyes. “It’s okay, Darling. We don’t need to get into that right now—or ever, if that makes you uncomfortable. I pretty much knew from the beginning that our futures were intertwined.”
Tamara’s mouth slackened, and she gasped.
“Don’t worry. I promised to be a gentleman, and I intend to. I just want you to understand how much I yearn for you.” He paused before adding, “And besides, I really want for you to trust me. Trust is essential for our relationship to work.” Josh’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “But it’s a fact that you excite me. With the full moon only days away, it’s going to be a challenge keeping my hands off you. I can already feel the pull, drawing me ever closer to you. I want to give in so badly, Tamara. But I promise you, you have nothing to be frightened of, not with me.”
Her back stiffened. She sat back on the couch and eyed him while her worries and concerns erupted to the surface. “But what if you’re wrong about me? What if you only feel this way because you’re drawn to my scent? What if it doesn’t work?”
Josh shook his head. “It will work but you must have faith. A wolf knows these things, Tamara. It’s instinctual with wolves, and it’s hard to explain, but I wanted to let you know I’m not attracted to you just because of your scent, or your beauty. It’s truly who you are that attracts me. Your scent only confirms it.”
Tamara still wasn’t sure if she believed him, but that didn’t stop her from smiling a coy, girlish grin. He made her feel beautiful, but Josh was desirable in his own right. He was practically oozing sex appeal.
“So,” she asked, knowing what the answer probably was, “when you say life mate, you mean like a husband and wife, committed type of relationship? Is that what you mean?”
His beautiful, dark eyelashes swept over his heavy lids. “Exactly.”
Tamara leaned back into a couch cushion. “That’s deep for not knowing someone.”
“I know you don’t believe me, but give it time. You’ll see. Right now you’re using your brain, but relationships are more complicated than that—it requires more of your heart.”
“Well, I guess you’re staying over is probably a good idea then.” She placed her hand over his. “I need for us to take the time to get to know each other. Are you okay with this? I can’t rush into anything despite what I might think about you and how I think I feel about you. I need this. I don’t believe in love at first sight.”
“I’m open to dating and getting to know you better. I think it would be nice.” Josh paused and smiled. “By the way, I didn’t thank you for the excellent care you provided to Nightfall. Thank you, my dear.”
“It’s okay, I have a soft spot for strays.”
Their laughter combined. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to him. Tamara happily melted into his strong, capable arms. She wanted the magical moment to continue, forever.
- CHAPTER THIRTEEN -
Two days later, Tamara was warming up to the idea of Josh being Nightfall. While he and Tamara went their separate way during the daytime hours, they met up at night to chat and spend time together.
After a nice, hot shower, Tamara walked into the living room to find Josh watching a horror movie, a genre she wasn’t too keen on. Still, curiosity took ahold of her when she found out it was not a typical slasher film, but one with a plot and substance. She sat down next to Josh, only to find herself locked within his strong, corded arms and enjoying the smell of his earthy musky scent every time she cried out at a spot in the movie that alarmed or surprised her.
She screeched as a blip of a mangled dog that looked a lot like Nightfall showed up on the screen.
“It’s okay, I’m here,” Josh reassured her. His fingers caressing her forearms soothed and calmed her nerves on edge.
During an extended commercial break, she did the unthinkable. His comfortable presence, the warm smile on his lips when she threw herself in his arms and his calm demeanor all overwhelmed her to the point that she lifted up to kiss him. Yet she didn’t kiss his cheek or his chin or anything as sensible as that. Oh no! She kissed him square across his lips and then gasped, her eyes widening with the knowledge of what she’d done. Then she slunk back to her side of the couch only to find Josh sliding on the couch cushions toward her.
“Tamara, what was that for?”
“Um, uh…a, um, thank you. For stepping between me and Keith, that is. I nev
er did thank you.”
As soon as the crazy explanation left her mouth, she regretted it. Yet, she couldn’t think of anything else to say.
“You can thank me anytime.”
She turned toward him. The kiss was actually a good one. Josh had soft lips and she longed to plant her mouth across his again. Yet, she didn’t dare do it. Instead, she leaned into him and let him hold her, once again.
Later that night, they moved to her bedroom where they reminisced about her days with Nightfall, when she didn’t know he was Josh. He reached for her. Tamara stiffened at first, surprised when she felt his long, lean fingers curving around her waist, and then she softened in his embrace. Her resistance to Josh waned the longer he held her in his strong arms, cooing to her beautiful words her brain didn’t want to acknowledge.
Despite her inner reservations, she clung to him for several long, blissful seconds before she strummed her hands across his firm back and sighed. “You feel so good.”
“So do you. You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this. For you.”
She lifted up to gaze into deep amber gold irises. “For me?”
He caressed the side of her cheek. “Yes. Only for you.”
Tamara panted and pulled him closer, ignoring the warning bells alarming within her brain and, instead, wallowing in the pleasant tingles sparking through her body urging her to continue. “I’m not sure what to do. Can I trust you?”
“I’d never harm you. I’ve rescued you twice. You don’t need to fear me…ever.”
“It’s not that. I don’t want you to think I’m easy, or slutty, in any way because I’m not.”
Josh growled. “Of course, you’re not—that’s one of the reasons I’m attracted to you.”
“I didn’t mean... I’m just trying to explain to you that I don’t normally invite strangers into my bedroom. But… it’s different with you. I don’t know why I feel this way. You’re not a stranger, but at the same time we hardly know each other. Still, I think I can trust you. So please don’t think differently of me for what I’m about to do.”