by Donna Alward
Ace rose from the table as if she hadn’t just given him a gift. “You think about my offer.”
She stood beside him, wishing she’d opted for higher heels. “You should take some of that money you think I’m after and buy yourself some manners.”
She left him there, refusing to let her steps falter as she crossed the dining room and made her way back to the hostess station.
This was her restaurant and he would not send her hiding into the back room. Sure, she’d break. But that would come later, when she was alone. He would walk out of here never knowing he’d shaken her to the core.
Or given her something more to consider. Slade must have told Ace about their relationship. Not the naughty details, but that he thought they had a future. He wasn’t giving up, wasn’t letting her go without a fight. It was both delicious and terrifying. She knew what he wanted, but never in her life had she considered being that kind of woman.
And now it was all she could think about.
Chapter Nine
Slade pulled his knapsack higher on his shoulder and knocked on Jules’s door again. This plan was far more risky than his original, but Ben had been right. If he wanted this to work, he had to play fair. And showing up with April would be fighting dirty. Not that he’d be above it if this blew up in his face.
Her car was right downstairs and the restaurant closed an hour ago. He leaned closer to the door.
“Jules, let me in or I’ll go check and see if you’re in the kitchen.”
At that, she pulled open the door, a vision with her hair pulled back and a pink sleep shirt hanging off one shoulder. “It’s Sunday.”
“Careful. If anyone sees you like that you’ll be married by Monday morning.”
“Never gonna happen.” She stepped aside so he could enter and closed the door behind him.
“I’ve been thinking.” He set his bag by the nightstand.
“And shopping.”
He looked down at his black dress shirt and slacks. “And shopping.”
“Your shirt is too small in the shoulders.”
“I thought that’s how they were supposed to fit. All tight and useless.”
“No. I’d offer to fix it, but I’m buried in wedding regalia. So, you need to go.”
“We need to talk.”
“No, we’re talked out. And I’m not some booty call where you can show up at midnight for a blowjob.”
He held up his hands. “That’s not why I’m here.”
“Really? Check your pants.” She spun and walked to a wedding dress she had on a mannequin body in the middle of the room.
He adjusted himself. “Sorry. You’re just well, you.”
“Yep, that’s me, the best piece of ass you’ll ever have. You know how to use a door, right?” She adjusted two lamps she had, shining their lights on the dress.
“Is that for the wedding in Portland you were talking about?” He stepped into her work area and pulled up a stool.
“This is your sister’s dress.”
“You’re kidding.” That had made her look like a kid playing dress-up. Which he was fine with. This was more, feminine. Almost sexy. There didn’t seem to be anything covering the back.
“I got lucky when I realized those hideous sleeves were a later addition. It freed me up to go for a deep V. Separating the material has been the most tedious thing in the history of time.”
He reached out and rubbed the soft lace between his fingers. “This looks nothing like it.”
“It looked so bad because it was discolored, and your sister is smaller than she seems. Preserving the integrity while taking it down to fit her is quite the puzzle.” She cleared her throat. “So you, door, any time now.”
“I’m not leaving.”
She peered at him around the dress. “If I blow you will you go? Because I could get down with that and be back to work in minutes. You know how you pop off as soon as I get that spot right behind your balls.”
“Maybe later. I figured you’d go into Portland tomorrow since the restaurant is closed, and I could go with you. We could spend some time talking instead of—”
“Fucking.”
“I swear, Jules, you are trying my patience right now.” He scrubbed his hands against his slacks. “I have half a mind to make love to you until you’re too exhausted to keep your walls up.”
“Never making that mistake again.”
“It wasn’t a mistake.” If he hadn’t seen her so completely broken down when he’d made love to her, so vulnerable after meeting April, he might take her at her word. She didn’t give any clues that she even noticed he was there as she pulled and pinned the dress for what felt like hours before she spoke again.
“Slade, you’re thinking with the wrong head here. I’m not the girl you’re looking for. And sleeping with me is distracting you from finding her. I know you wanted to keep things going until I left, but let’s face it, you’re just not the fling type.”
“Agreed. But neither are you.”
“Oh, lover. I’m made for it. Ask anyone.”
“Stop. I know you have it in your head that I care about who you were with before, but I don’t. Even if you slept with half the guys here, I’m sure my number is still higher than yours.”
“Yeah, right.”
“You ever heard of buckle bunnies, sweetheart? When Ace and I were on the rodeo circuit for team roping, we did pretty well, and that made the girls that follow the show take notice. Are you going to hold that against me?”
She shrugged. “I should probably thank them. You have quite the skill set.”
He shook his head. If she was trying to block out her emotions with sex, she must still be feeling overwhelmed. “At the state university there’s a Weston Hall. We sponsor a lot of stuff there. And they have a design program. Ace can get you into it with a phone call.”
“I can get into any design program I choose on my own merit, thank you very much.”
“Yes, but I’m asking you to stay here, and go to one three hours away instead of the one in New York you got into. It doesn’t have to be me or school. You can have both. I know I’m asking a lot.”
“You have no idea what you’re asking.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper and her hands shook as she did something or other with the skirt of the dress.
“I know we weren’t in your plans. And that it would be easiest for you to go to New York and throw all your energy into becoming a successful designer.”
“It wouldn’t be easy. Not anymore.”
Hope surged through him. “I can see forever with you, Jules.” She froze and it took all his strength not to reach for her. “I know you can see it too. And it’s not what you had in mind. But we can find a middle ground. It doesn’t have to be you setting your life down and picking up mine. We can make a life together.”
“Slade—”
“If it were just me, I’d go with you. If it were just me, I wouldn’t ask you to give up so much.”
“But it’s not just you. You come with a ranch, a family and two kids that need a mother. And that is not something I can fail at. I can bake a bad cake, or make an ugly dress. But kids remember the smallest things.” She caught his gaze, her blue eyes glistening.
“I know it’s too much to ask you. But I can’t be without them, or take them from here.”
“It’s not that. They belong here and so do you.” She shook her head and came to stand between his legs. “I don’t think I’m strong enough to give them what they need. If I did everything right, which I wouldn’t, but even if I did, I’d have to remake this same dress for April and help her get ready for her wedding day.” Her voice got quieter with each word until she was barely speaking at all. “And her eyes will meet mine in the mirror. And she’ll say ‘I wish my mother were here.’ And I’ll have to smile and nod and pretend my heart did not just break.”
Her wrapped his arms around her and held on. He couldn’t let go. Not now, not ever. Not when she got it. Got him, got
them.
She pulled back and swiped at her red-rimmed eyes. “That’s definitely not what you came here for. And now I’ve ruined your new shirt.”
“It doesn’t fit anyway.” She tried to pull away, but he fisted his hands in the loose material of her nightshirt. “I fall more in love with you every day, Jules O’Connor. And I’m never going to stop.”
“You love being in love. I’m the wrong girl at the right time.”
He narrowed his gaze, recalling how Ace had said the exact phrase when they’d talked. “I do love being in love, but it doesn’t happen randomly. There is something between two people that has to click, to hinge two lives together.”
“You want a wife. You have ever since Amanda died. I can’t replace her.”
He nodded. “You showed me that trying to interview for a new wife wasn’t going to work out. I had to love again. It’s like April.”
She leaned back. “Are you comparing me to your kid?”
“Hold on. I have a point. When we had Gus, I was so in love with that boy. He was this little butterball I wanted to take with me everywhere. I had him with me on a horse at six months. Amanda nearly killed me.”
“You think?”
“He loved it. But when we had April, I thought I’d never love her as much as Gus. I worried about it, because that could really mess up a kid. I even talked to my dad about it and he said not to worry. It’s like your heart just adds on a new room for that love to live in. And as soon as I saw her, this tiny pink thing, it just happened. The room opened up and it was different than what I feel for Gus. But it’s the same. And that’s how it’s been with you. I’ve been going around trying to put someone in Amanda’s room in my heart, and then you came along and opened your own. And you don’t expect me to lock her door, or pretend that room doesn’t exist.”
“She died Slade, it’s not like she left. The kids need to know you still love her, even if there is someone else with you.”
“You should marry me.” He framed her face in his hands.
She rested her forehead against hers. “Maybe we should date first. Make sure this is real.”
“It’s real.”
“It’s real enough for us, but it’s not just us.”
“In this it is. I tried to buy you a ring today.”
“You what?” Her head snapped up so fast he dropped his hands.
“Do you know how hard it is to buy something for a designer? I bought this outfit so you wouldn’t think I was too redneck to take to the city. And I got that wrong.”
She smoothed her hands along the shoulders of his shirt. “Not wrong, exactly. I just have a thing for fit. You buy a shirt to fit the shoulders, then tailor the rest.”
“Most people just buy a shirt. Full stop.”
“You don’t want to come with me to Portland. I have to deliver bridesmaid dresses and shop. Neither are your thing.” She switched off the lamps and the room darkened, lit only by the streetlights outside.
“I can make them my thing.”
“I’m never going to make whatever it is you do with cows my thing. Even if this works and I move ten miles from the middle of nowhere. I like heels and dresses and jewelry.”
“Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.”
“It smells, cowboy. I have an aversion to stink.” She came back to him and started on the buttons of his shirt.
“I’m just saying that someday, you might learn to like riding. There are places on the ranch you can’t get to any other way.”
“Maybe.”
He stilled her hands as she pulled his shirt free of his slacks. “You’ll stay?”
“I can’t believe it, but I’m staying. Here in this apartment, I’m not moving in with you.”
“If you need to take it slow, that’s okay. As long as you’re staying.” He released her hands and she raced straight for his belt.
“Not slow, just not so fast people think we’re speeding.”
“I don’t care what people think.”
“I care what Amanda’s parents think. And Ben. And your mom.”
“My mom thought I was following you to New York, so I think you’re good there. She even offered to stay with the kids tonight and tomorrow so I could be here.” Though she had a point about his in-laws. They wanted him to be happy, but they’d want to get to know Jules.
“I like her.”
“Everyone does.” He pulled her hair loose from the ponytail. “We’ll take this as fast or slow as you want.”
“I’m scared I’m going to make all these changes and you won’t like the new me. And then you’ll take my whole life with you when you go.”
“You know what I like best about you?”
She pulled her nightshirt over her head. “My tits.”
He tried to drag in a breath, because damn. She was a vision standing there in the twilight wearing only some barely there panties.
“See, I knew it.” She undid his slacks and worked the zipper over his erection.
“Hell.” He grabbed her and pulled her tight against him. Not that feeling her hard nipples against his bare chest calmed his cock, but at least he couldn’t be distracted by the image. “I love that you see what you want and you go after it. Don’t change that, and we’ll be good.”
“What if you don’t want what I want?”
“Compromise is a good thing.”
Her small hands had just enough room to grip his cock. She squeezed him until he groaned. “I love that you see things in me that no one else does. Never stop doing that, okay?”
He caught her lips in a kiss that grew heated, frantic with each pass of their mouths. He rose from the stool and she wrapped herself around him. He gripped her ass as he carried her to the bed and laid her down. It became a race to get clothes off, to touch and kiss and taste. Somehow, knowing they’d get to do this forever made him want to start forever right now.
He finally got them both naked and ready, but when he reached for a condom, she wiggled her way down his body.
“Do flavored condoms work?” He shook the box and studied the last three condoms. Each had a cartoon picture of fruit on the front.
She laughed against his belly before placing a kiss there, and then lower. His breath quickened and excitement stirred through him.
“I’m serious here. Do you know?”
“I know they don’t taste good.” She wrapped her warm fingers around his cock, so hard she had to feel it pulsing in her hand.
“Damn it.”
“Want to know something I never tell?” Her breath teased the head of his cock.
He clenched his jaw. “You have a secret stash?”
She gave his head a long lick. “I’m on the pill. Condoms are just safer.”
“Thank you.” He closed his eyes and relaxed back against the pillows.
“I’ve never done it before, though.” She teased him with her tongue, her hand beginning to stroke.
He glanced down, her blonde hair hiding her face as she took him in her hot mouth. She tucked some behind her ear but it fell forward as she dipped her head lower. He reached for her, gripping her hair out of the way so he could watch. With so little light, the scene was almost in black and white, She moaned as she took him deeper, the sound vibrating through him.
She teased him with her tongue, her eyelashes fluttering with her in and out, in and out, the rhythm quickening as she massaged his balls and then lower to that spot that sent blood rushing to his ears.
His control snapped and he tightened his hold, pushing into her as pleasure crashed into him. Her cheeks hollowed she swallowed, and then swallowed again. If he’d had anything left, he would have come again at the sight.
She released him from the warmth of her mouth and he hissed as the cold air hit. She straddled him, covering him with the heat of her sex. His semi-hard cock twitched as if it wanted to drive inside her. And he would, as soon as he got his answer.
“Jules?” he wrapped his hands over the curves of her hips
. “You’re going to marry me.”
She grinned down at him and circled her hips. “I suppose I’ll have to eventually. But we’ll have to come up with a story for when people ask how you proposed. I’ll get the side eye if I say I blew him and he begged.”
“Yeah, we can’t go with the truth on this one.”
She started to rock as his cock hardened beneath her. “This feels really naughty.”
“It feels really good.” He traced his hands up her body and palmed her breasts. She leaned into his hands and moaned.
“I’m kind of nervous.”
“Why?”
“Because I could get pregnant. I mean, I won’t, because of the pill, but this is… I’m being silly, right?”
He saw it then, a vision of her just like this, only her belly swollen with his child. God, how he wanted that.
“I really don’t want to get pregnant until after.”
“After you marry me.” His cheeks tightened as he smiled. “You’ve thought about it.”
“My mind goes there no matter how hard I tried to convince myself I needed to leave. If we have a baby soon, the kids will be like one family, but if we wait it will be like two separate ones.”
His heart squeezed in his chest and he pulled her down for a kiss. He rolled her over and was inside of her before his next breath. Because he needed her, to be with her and in her, to forget where he ended and she began. Because they weren’t separate, not anymore. Not ever again.
She wrapped her arms and legs around him and matched him thrust for thrust, opening herself to him so he could go deeper, faster, longer, stronger. Until they raced toward oblivion and jumped off the edge together. He spilled inside of her and held on, knowing that soon this would have a purpose.
She brushed his hair off his forehead. “Hey, you okay?”
“I love you, Jules.”
“Well you better. We’re getting married.” She slid her legs down his and pursed her lips together. “This is going to be messy, isn’t it?”
He laughed and she joined in. “Can I take you to Portland tomorrow?”
“Cowboy, you can take me anywhere.”