I let out a sigh. “Yes, but I can’t call.”
“Why not?”
“I just can’t.”
I didn’t care to elaborate. Telling her I wasn’t ready to hear his voice again would open a can of worms. She’d have too many questions I knew I wouldn’t be able to answer.
The nail polish along the corner of my middle finger chipped as I worked my fingers, a nervous habit I’d always had. I tossed my cell onto my bed and rolled to my side, so I could reach under the bed for my red fingernail polish. It was third in the line of bottles I stored there. As I shook it, I leaned back against my pillow. My gaze drifted to my cell beside me. Maybe just this once Van would listen to me; maybe he really would do as I asked.
The aroma of fingernail polish floated through the air when I opened the bottle. It was a scent some hated, but one I loved. I fixed the chip in my nail and then blew on it after closing the bottle. The sight of my nail being perfect again settled some panic in me. Keeping my outside looking perfect fooled people. It kept them from seeing what a hot mess I really was inside. If I didn’t let it show, they didn’t think anything was wrong, and then they had no reason to ask.
“What are you working on? Did one of your professors give you an assignment already?” I asked, glancing at her. I hoped the conversation would distract me from my thoughts—from my past. “None of mine have given me anything yet. Well, Professor Trinity told us to meditate nightly for five minutes, but it’s not mandatory. I haven’t been doing it. I’ve learned meditation isn’t for me.”
Purposely being in my head for any extended period wasn’t high on my agenda lately.
“It’s not for class. I told you I like to read, but what I didn’t tell you is that I’m a book blogger.” Excitement festered in Nora’s eyes as she glanced at me to gauge my expression.
“What’s a book blogger? You mean, you blog about books?”
“Yup.” Her attention shifted back to her laptop, and she resumed typing.
“Do you tell the people on your blog every detail of the story?” I asked only because she’d been typing for a solid twenty minutes. I couldn’t imagine having more than two sentences to say about a book once I finished reading it. I mean, either you liked it or you didn’t.
“No. I talk about what I liked. What I didn’t, if anything. Who my favorite character was. If I thought the romance was realistic. There are lots of different things I put into each post. Sometimes I’ll even add a few quotes from the book that resonated with me or made me laugh.”
I placed my nail polish back beneath my bed and then stood to grab my lipstick from on top of my dresser. “Does the author ever read your review?” I asked as I walked to the mirror hung on the inside of our closet door to touch up my lipstick.
“Most of them.”
“Do you get anything for reviewing their book? Like do they compensate you?” I had no idea how this worked, but the conversation was keeping my mind away from Van.
Well, for the most part.
Nora’s eyes bugged. I saw it clearly in the mirror. “No. I mean some might send me a signed bookmark or an advanced reader copy of their next book in the series, but I don’t do it for money. I do it because I love the author and the worlds they create, and I want to share their books with others. I enjoy supporting authors.” She closed her laptop and stared at me. Even if I hadn’t been able to see her reflection in the mirror, I would’ve felt her eyes on me. “I guess I should get ready for class too. What’s your first one today?”
I pressed my lips together, blending the bright red in and giving them a matte finish. “Introduction to Moon Phases.”
It was the one class I was most excited about. That, and Werewolf History. Learning about my werewolf side was one of the main reasons I was here, besides going into hiding. If I wanted to be a full-fledged Wolf Blood, then I needed to be in tune with my wolf like I was with my vampire. So far, my wolf was just an unpredictable, wild side of me. Having been raised by a vampire nest and my vampire mother, and never having been around many werewolves before, was to blame.
My wolf didn’t know how to act.
I figured this place was where we could learn together how werewolves were supposed to behave. This place was supposed to help me find balance. At least, that was the hope.
Nora slipped out of bed and stepped to her dresser where she grabbed her shower caddy and the change of clothes she’d set out the night before. She was so organized it was bordering on being OCD. “I have Wolf Blood Essentials One. Not exactly sure what the syllabus for today will be, but I imagine it will have something to do with learning control over both our sides.”
“You’d think.” I smoothed my eyebrows, making sure not a hair was out of place. “I have that class later today.”
Nora slipped out of the room to head to the communal showers, and I stepped to where my phone still sat on my bed. Why was I waiting on pins and needles for Van to text? I’d told him to leave me alone.
Would it be so bad if he listened?
* * *
Introduction to Moon Phases had been okay. It wasn’t my favorite, but I’d gained some new knowledge today. I still felt disappointed though. It wasn’t going to be as hands-on or in-depth as I’d thought it would. Maybe, it was because it was only a first-year class.
On my way to Wolf Blood Essentials, I popped the top on the drink I’d grabbed earlier from a vending machine at the dorm house as I walked. It was practically midday, and the sun was shining bright. There was a slight chill to the air, but it was welcomed. A girl I remembered from one of my classes gave me a wave as we passed one another, and I smiled in response. Being here, at the academy, felt good. It was crazy to think this would be my typical day from here on out until I graduated.
I was okay with it though. Choosing to come here had been one of the best decisions I’d ever made.
When I stepped into the classroom, I made my way to my usual desk in the back. The seats filled up as more entered the room. I was recognizing faces and remembering their names. My gaze drifted to the door, watching as more of my peers filed into the room. Axel’s nerdy roommate entered then. He started toward the desk beside me. I groaned, without knowing why. He wasn’t Axel. He hadn’t even chosen the guy to be his roommate; he’d been assigned to him.
I should cut him some slack.
“Hey. How’s it going?” he asked, same as he did every day as he situated himself in the desk beside me. “Hope your day has been better than mine so far.” He unzipped his bookbag and fished around inside before pulling out a notebook and pen.
“Not having luck with your first few classes today?”
“She speaks.” His eyes widened in mock surprise. I rolled my eyes and flashed him a small smile. “And, not really. My last class was Werewolf History. I’m a huge history buff, so I sort of contradicted some things the professor mentioned. He didn’t seem to care for it, but his views seem to be a little one-sided.”
“So, you were butting heads with him the entire period I take it, then?”
“Absolutely.” His grin widened. There was a sense of pride reflected in his features.
“Good morning, class,” Professor Erma said. “Our focus for today’s class will be learning the roots to your vampire side. We’ll be busting the myths and rumors surrounding vampires, discussing vampire traditions…”
I tuned her out. If this was all the class would be about, then I didn’t see why I was here. I knew all of this. Hell, I could probably teach the class. A nest raised me for crying out loud. One that only stuck to traditional vampire ways. My mother didn’t even come out during sunlight hours—though she could—because she was that hardcore.
“Let me guess, vampires raised you,” Lee said, surprising me. Was I that transparent?
If so, I needed to get my shit together.
“How did you know?”
“Your body language said it all. Plus, I’ve suspected as much for a while now.”
I arched a brow
. “My body language?”
“Yeah. You rolled your eyes and let out a little huff while leaning back in your seat and folding your arms over your chest. That’s body language for being uninterested. I see it a lot from the female population.” His cheeks reddened at his joke.
I wanted to laugh. The chuckle built in the back of my throat, but I didn’t release it, because I didn’t want to embarrass him more than he already was.
“You’re observant,” I said instead.
“That I am.” He jotted down something the professor had said on his pad of paper, and then shifted his attention back to me. “Which parent of yours was the vampire?”
Normally, I wouldn’t have answered a question like that, but something about Lee made me feel comfortable. I liked talking with him. It made me feel guilty for not having done so sooner.
“My mom,” I answered.
The corner of his lips twisted into a satisfied smile. It let me know he’d been right in his assumption. “Was she a traditionalist?”
I rolled my eyes. “Yep. Her entire nest was.”
“I figured you’d say she had a nest. Most traditionalists do. It’s funny though, because back in the day, vampires were solitary creatures. They didn’t have nests. They didn’t stay with their bloodline or creator either. They roamed the Earth alone.”
“Back in the day?” I chuckled.
“You know what I mean.”
I opened my mouth to say something in response, but the professor called us out for speaking. Lee immediately apologized. I remained mute while holding her stare. She had my attention, but I wouldn’t apologize for having a conversation—especially not one that pertained to her class.
Time ticked on. By the end of the class, Lee had pages of notes and I didn’t have a single word. I had no idea what he’d jotted down—or what half the others in class had—there had been nothing said that I felt was important enough to write down. Everything the professor talked about, I already knew. Notes would have been pointless.
“You have lunch next, right?” Lee asked as he gathered his things.
I glanced at him and smiled. He had this lost puppy look festering in his eyes. It was cute. “I do. So does my roommate, Nora. Do you want to sit with us?”
“If you don’t mind.” He flashed me a lopsided grin as he shifted his books in his arms. Why he didn’t put them in his backpack was beyond me. “I’m tired of sitting alone.”
“Axel doesn’t have this lunch?” I asked even though I already knew the answer. Lee shook his head. “Would he sit with you if he did?” It was a joke, but the look on Lee’s face let me know it wasn’t a funny one.
“He might look like a tough guy—and he is—but he’s a good guy. I’m not sure what’s in his past, but I know whatever it is, it haunts him. He’s broken by it. I feel for him, so don’t make jokes about him, okay?”
I swallowed hard. Weren’t we all a little haunted and broken by our past?
“I didn’t say that, though,” Lee was quick to add. “He’d probably kill me if he knew I said that about him, especially to you.”
I gave him a look. “Especially to me, huh?”
I was playing with fire. I knew exactly what he’d meant, and didn’t know why I was egging it on. Axel reminded me too much of Van. Especially now that I knew for certain he was haunted by his past. He would be another guy who unintentionally made me fall in love with them while using me, and then I’d be the one to get hurt in the end.
Again.
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re his type even if he isn’t ready to admit it to himself yet. To be honest, he seems a little lost.” Lee scrunched up his face. “I didn’t say that either. I really need to shut my mouth.”
Satisfaction slithered through me at the thought of being Axel’s type. I stomped it out though. It wasn’t something I should feel. Not for him. Not for anyone.
Not right now at least. I had bigger things to focus on… like my past.
“Don’t worry, I won’t say anything.” It was the truth. I didn’t have any intentions of talking to Axel again. It was best if I kept my distance from him. He would only lead to more heartache and inner turmoil. And, I’d already had enough of that to last me a lifetime.
“Thanks,” Lee said as we entered the student center where the dining hall was.
It was a decent-sized room filled with tables and chairs. The place was busy, but I found a few open tables. I spotted Nora next. She stood in line, waving her arms frantically at me while she waited to pay for her lunch.
“And, there’s Nora.” I started in her direction. Lee chuckled as he walked with me.
“Is she always so energetic?”
“Yup.”
“Faith, oh my gosh! You won’t believe what happened,” Nora said as soon as we reached her. She slipped out of line to follow me while I checked out the selection of food offered today. “After my last class, I had a few minutes to kill before lunch since my professor let us out early, so I swung by the library. I spotted a poster for the school newsletter on the bulletin board. The description said they were looking for someone to recommend books and write up reviews of popular titles for it. You know how much I love to read. It’s like this position was made for me!”
“That’s awesome,” I said, feeling genuinely happy for her.
“I know, right?” Her eyes widened when I thought they couldn’t any more. “I immediately asked the librarian about it. I told her about my blog and everything. She looked me up while I browsed the library’s selection and then came to find me. I got the position! It doesn’t pay anything, but it’s still exciting.”
“Congratulations! When does the first newsletter go out?” I asked while I piled a pasta salad with grilled chicken onto my tray.
“You’ll have to give me the link for it. I can spread the word about it. I’m into reading too,” Lee insisted, sounding a little too enthusiastic. It was clear he thought Nora was attractive.
A grin twisted at my lips. They’d be the cutest nerdy couple at the academy.
Nora looked at Lee as though having just now noticed his presence. “Uh, yeah. I will. Thanks.” She stepped behind two people waiting to pay. Her attention bounced back and forth between Lee and me. It was clear I had some explaining to do later.
I grabbed a twelve-ounce can of O positive and added it to my tray. It was synthetic, like all the other blood on campus, but I didn’t care. I compared it to drinking vitamin water—it was still water, which was something your body needed to survive, but it was filled with vitamins and minerals your body also needed, giving it an extra boost.
Synthetic blood was no different.
Once both Lee and I had gotten what we wanted and paid, we found Nora at a table off to the side, but still in the thick of things. I would have preferred to sit near the back of the dining hall, so I could people watch, but one glance made me realize there wasn’t another table available.
Silence bloomed between the three of us after Lee and I were situated at the table. I could feel Nora’s eyes on me, but I didn’t look up. I knew she was wondering why he was sitting with us.
“So, which class has been your favorite so far?” Lee asked, breaking up the awkward silence as his eyes bounced between the two of us.
“Meditation and Spiritual Release, I think,” Nora answered before I could.
“Really? Are you into all that yoga and meditation stuff?” Lee wrinkled his nose. Obviously, neither were his thing.
“Sort of.” Nora shrugged. She stuck a straw into her can of blood. O positive for the win today. All three of us had picked it. “I like silence, so meditation isn’t a big deal for me. I could sit in silence for hours and not feel restless. And, yoga has turned out to be more relaxing than I thought it would. Stretching my muscles feels good.”
I listened to them holding a conversation together and couldn’t help but smile as I again thought they would be a cute couple.
“I don’t mind silence. Or stretching. Maybe it
was my teacher. She seemed too wound up to teach the class, like she’d had too much coffee.” Lee popped a slice of bacon from his BLT into his mouth and chewed. “What about you?” He nodded to me.
“Moon Phases has been cool.” Or at least I thought it would be once we got further into the curriculum.
A commotion broke out behind me. I glanced over my shoulder to see what was going on. Two guys seemed ready to go at it, but their friends’ pulled them apart.
“Got to watch out for those in Wolf Bitten,” Lee said, drawing my attention back to him. “They’re like ticking time bombs waiting to explode. I mean it. You should’ve seen some of them playing basketball yesterday. You would’ve thought they were going to go to war with each other over a freaking foul.”
“I think there are people like that in all the houses,” Nora insisted. “You can’t put a bunch of werewolves in one place and not expect them to fight or be hostile with each other in some way. Especially when some have hybrid sides and others don’t.”
I’d often thought the same.
Lee looked like he was about to say something, but the sight of something—no, someone—had him clamping his mouth shut. I followed his gaze. He was staring at a guy who looked like a Viking near the back of the room. He had solid muscles and dark eyes that were fixed on Lee. He nodded toward the exit and then left the dining hall.
What was that about? Did Lee know him?
“Pretty sure that guy wants to talk to you. What’s his deal?” I asked Lee. When he didn’t speak right away, I glanced at him. The look on his face made it clear he didn’t want to be anywhere near the guy. He looked scared of him. “Hey. What’s going on?”
“Nothing. He just wants to talk.” Lee didn’t meet my stare as he gathered his half-eaten lunch and stood. “Thanks for letting me eat with you two. I’m sure I’ll see you both around.”
He left the table before either of us could say another word. I could sense his nerves in the air, that and something else—fear. What was he afraid of? That guy, or what the guy might do to him?
Wolf Blood: Lunar Academy, Year One Page 7