by V. K. Ludwig
Odrin sits up straight. “There he is!”
An onslaught of cheers overwhelms my ears, and the couch quivers underneath us as the audience stomps when Adrin enters the cage. Thin metal rods frame the structure, the gaps closed with what has to be some sort of plexiglass.
He paces along the cage, his naked feet sinking slightly into the white mats, and he rolls his shoulders as he always does before a fight. A thin layer of sweat glistens on his body, probably from warming up, and his black shorts ride deliciously low on his hips.
My veins heat at the sight, and my body hums.
His hair is braided tighter than usual, bringing out his strong jaw, and those predatory, golden eyes. Add to that his broad shoulders, the v-shape of his eight-pack disappearing into his shorts, and arms corded with muscle… how can a male stacked with raw strength be so gentle on the inside?
Scanning the first rows, his eyes lock with mine, and he winks just as I swear he mouths, “Hey, alien beauty.”
“Hey, stranger,” I whisper. “So, what title is he fighting for exactly?”
“Defending,” Odrin says. “He’s been defending his title for three tournaments straight now. Lucky bastard’s making a fortune holding on to it.”
His opponent is half a head shorter than Adrin but no less muscled, and his fawn horns curl slightly forward at the tip, making them a dangerous weapon. He holds his tail slightly offset to the side, claw hovering at hip height.
Above us, the speaker lists their stats. When a holographic countdown appears above the cage, everyone goes quiet. The eerie silence drives my pulse up and runs a shudder down my spine. Twice I’ve seen Adrin fight, each time oblivious to just how good he has to be.
And he truly is.
The beep announcing the start of the fight still rings inside my ears when he rams his horns into his opponent. With a twist of his head, he unbalances him, and slams him against the glass wall. The arena vibrates with shouts, it has to be. But all I hear is the rush of my blood and each inhale I suck into depleted lungs.
“He’s in great shape.” I jump at the sound of Zorvik’s voice. “Mind if I sit down?”
I pat the seat beside me. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”
“Silas got bad news and is moping, so I figured I’d watch the fight with him.” He juts his chin to one of the rows behind us, where Silas stares at the ground. “Then I saw you, and figured I’d say hi.”
“Bad news?”
“His, um…” Zorvik’s voice trails off, and he sucks on his upper lip before he continues. “His best friend Lucan was offered a contract to an estate in Quelldale. It’s on the opposite side of the planet, so Silas isn’t too happy about, you know, being so far away from, well…”
“His lover. No need to tiptoe around it.” Hey, can’t blame them for liking dick. I do too. “I feel sorry for them, but I don’t get why they joined the saikhmenti in the first place if the goal is ending up at a female’s estate.”
“It’s a matter of honor.”
Right… as in, the opposite of shame.
Zorvik scratches the bottom of his two-toned horns, his deep green eyes narrowing slightly as he says, “I received an offer as well.”
My stomach constricts. Great, that puts me back to one saikh, no fucking clue who else to accept, and only two weeks left to finish what I couldn’t get done in two months. All because I’m freaking out over something Adrin doesn’t even bat an eye at.
“I’m happy for you,” I say. “I know it’s what every scholar is hoping for.”
He takes my hand into his. “I was hoping for an offer from you.”
My gaze falls to where his thumb strokes over my knuckles: a gentle caress, innocent yet sincere, perfectly executed with just the right pressure. And yet…
And yet I pull my hand away in a sort of delayed reflex. “Wow, um…”
“Come on, Izzy. Don’t tell me you’re surprised. We went on three dates, I visited you at work, and I thought I made it quite clear how much I like you.”
“I like you too.”
Just not nearly as much as Adrin, which confuses the shit out of me because… what if I can’t divide my affection? What if I don’t want to? What if I’ll mess this all up, making four lives miserable just because I’m developing feelings for a male who likely doesn’t return them?
Breath bursts in and out of my lungs at record speed. How can I be upset about Zorvik having an offer one second, and just as upset that he wants my offer instead the very next? I’m not making any sense.
Zorvik tilts his head. “You only want Adrin. Is that it?”
Yes, that’s it! “I’m obligated to take in three saikhs, and that contract is rock-solid.”
Nena places a calming hand onto my shoulder and leans into me. “What’s wrong?”
I gesture Zorvik to give me a moment and turn to her, whispering, “Are Cato and Yerosh never jealous of each other?”
“I give them no reason to be.” When my eyes flick to Adrin, she makes a sound at the back of her throat. “Izzy, my brother was the one who asked me to come and meet you here, so you could see that my union with two saikhs is quite enjoyable. If the idea bothers him, why would he have suggested it?”
She’s got a point there.
And wasn’t Adrin the one who suggested I invite Zorvik? Maybe Nena is right, and my problem isn’t so much that I can’t picture another saikh next to me, but the fact that I didn’t divide my attention equally so far. I’ve spent so much time with Adrin, no wonder Zorvik’s touch feels… wrong.
“Keep him down!” Odrin shouts.
Adrin holds his opponent pinned underneath a shin, lips curled back over his short fangs, his chest heaving as the crowd roars, celebrating his victory. If he’s okay with this, why would I not be?
I return my gaze to Zorvik. “Would you like to come to my estate Tuesday night? Together with Adrin?”
Thirteen
Adrin
Did I suggest Izzy invite Zorvik? Yes.
And it’s great that she did. Truly, it is.
She’s opening up to another male.
Great. Just… great.
I climb out of the drone in front of Izzy’s estate and check my com. She asked us to be here at eight. I’m half an hour early. Not entirely by accident. This is a new experience for her, and I bet she’s nervous, so I figured I’d arrive before Zorvik. Ease her mind and all that.
I knock the door to her estate.
Zorvik opens. “Hey, you made it.”
Bile burns at the back of my throat. Of course I made it. Question is: why the vek did he make it before me?
“You’re early,” I say and step inside, nostrils flaring at the scent of… flowers? “Didn’t she say eight?”
He shrugs. “Figured I’d come sooner. Ease her mind and all that, you know?”
“Uh-huh.” That was my job.
I step into the kitchen, stomach convulsing at the sight of holographic flowers on the counter. Why didn’t I bring any? Something’s wrong here. No… something’s wrong with me. He brought her flowers. Good!
They’re not her favorite though…
“Adrin!”
The moment Izzy walks up to me, I grab her waist and pull her against me. I rub my face over her short hair, taking in her scent, and run my palms up and down her sides. So small. So beautiful.
I press a kiss onto her forehead. “How was work?”
“Boring. Luckily, Zorvik showed up for an hour, which made the time go faster.”
Did he now… “Would you like me to make us some kot’ikesh?”
“I prepared us unji balls while we waited for you.” Zorvik points at a platter beside the flowers, the sweet treat shaped into animals. Show-off.
I grab the platter and let the contents slip into the trash. “She’s allergic to the nuts in it.”
“I am?” Izzy asks.
No idea, but she might be. Why would we take chances? “Remember when you got those red spots on your arms?”
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She lifts a brow at me. “No.”
Neither do I. “Well, I remember, and it came from those nuts.”
“Shit,” Zorvik says. “I’m sorry Izzy. That won’t happen again.”
“It’s alright, you couldn’t know.” Izzy’s hands fumble in front of her tummy, her smile strained. “So, um… should we… watch a movie together?”
Zorvik nods eagerly. “I love movies! What would you like to watch?”
“A horror, maybe?”
“I’ll look something up,” I say and head toward the couch, activating the entertainment hub while I give her a wink. “And I promise I’ll look for zombies before I go home.”
If I go home. I might stay.
Zorvik carries a tray with three wine glasses to the table. “Zombies don’t exist.”
“They said the same about aliens,” I say. “And look at us now. Watching a movie and drinking wine with one.”
He smiles at Izzy. “Beautiful alien.”
What the vek! That’s my line!
Not exactly like that, but still…
The moment we sit down, I pull Izzy onto my lap, whispering, “I missed you all day.”
She tells me the same by snuggling herself against my chest, her weight on my thighs searing my muscles since I’m sore from the fight, but I don’t care. This is where she belongs. Close to me.
And Zorvek?
He sits where he belongs: beside us.
With a lot of distance.
Increasingly so, given how I scoot away from him in slow-motion over the course of many, many minutes. He wants to be her saikh? Fine. This right here is where we establish hierarchy and dominance.
We watch a movie, and I cover Izzy’s eyes whenever she tenses in my arms, making sure to leave a little peek-gap between my fingers. That’s pretty much the only way she watches these types of movies. I love those quirks about her.
Her knuckles brush over the side if my neck, and I soften against her touch. Over and over they caress my skin, and I enjoy the gentle bump-bump-bump, and how she quietly moans—
I suck in a sharp breath.
Wait a minute.
Unless she dislocated her shoulder, there’s no way—
My head snaps to the left.
Rage pumps through my veins.
Zorvik’s fingers stroke through her hair, his knuckles bumping against my neck. Not sure what pisses me off more: that he’s touching her, or that he isn’t paying enough attention, touching me as well.
I click my tongue and stare him down, mumbling, “Do. Not. Touch. Me.”
“Sorry,” he mouths, and what the vek is he doing tugging on her hips? “Izzy, can you sit with me for a little bit?”
“She’s comfy the way she is,” I say clipped. “Besides, she gets scared with the movies, yet insists on watching them. So I cover her eyes when she tenses—”
“I know,” he says, and when he tugs on her again, my fingers dig into her waist. “I observed it for the last half hour, and have no problems imitating it, if that’s what pleases her.”
He couldn’t imitate me no matter how hard he tries. “She’ll get scared.”
“Then I’ll look for zombies before I go home.”
Oh, he will go home, but he won’t be looking for any zombies. “Back off, Zorvik.”
Izzy tenses on my lap before she jumps up, arms clasped around her tummy. “Stop bickering!”
“Look what you did!” Zorvik gets up and wraps his arms around her. “It’s okay, Izzy. Things can get a bit bumpy between saikhs in the beginning, but it all sorts itself out in the end.”
I love how she frees herself from his hug.
I hate how she steps away from mine, clasping herself tightly just as she utters underneath her breath, pacing. “What was I thinking? This is fucking awful. What am I gonna do?”
“It’s our fault, Izzy.” Zorvik circles his thumb over a relaxing pressure point beside her shoulder, his touch masterful, and, unfortunately, I can’t correct anything about it. “Adrin and I are new to this as well. You know what’s the problem? He and I should have stepped aside the moment he came to discuss all this. We wronged you.” His green eyes snap to me. “But we’re going to step outside for a moment now and fix it, aren’t we?”
Izzy’s posture relaxes, albeit slowly. “Please do, because this is freaking me out.”
Her eyes are wide, and she tortures her upper lip. The sight of it drives equal amounts of shame and guilt into my bones. Shame for how I’m letting her down. Guilt for the fact that it’s likely my fault. Only mine. I need to get a grip because I’m the one who suggested this.
I walk up to her and whisper a kiss over the shell of her ear. “Zorvik and I will go outside for a moment. When we return, we’ll do so much better, okay? Don’t let this discourage you.”
We leave through the front, and the door behind me just falls into its lock when Zorvik spins around, pinning me down with his stare. “What the vek, Adrin? She’s extremely uncomfortable, and that’s your fault.”
“Oh yeah, sure. Blame it all on me. Who played with my earlobe?”
“How about you stop wrapping yourself around every single cell of her body, and give me some room to work here? It’s impossible not to bump into you because you’re veking everywhere.”
I shrug. “What can I say? She’s very open to my touch.”
His scoff carries a sarcastic chuckle at the end. “Yes, Adrin. I know full well just how open she is to your touch.”
“What the vek’s that supposed to mean?”
“Do you really think I don’t know that you slept with her?” He crosses his arms in front of his chest, lifting a thumb toward his sternum. “I was still a good ten steps away from your door when I realized you’re breaking a serious rule that night.”
I take a strong step toward him. “Are you threatening to snitch on me?”
“You veking jerk,” he snarls. “The only reason nobody else caught you was because I positioned myself across your door, coughing my lungs out whenever someone else walked by. For five damn hours, Adrin.”
That sucks the air straight out of my lungs. “Look, it’s not the way you think, okay? She walked straight into a bunch of mating growls.”
“Even if that wasn’t the case, brother, I always liked you, and I wouldn’t tell on you.” He jerks his head back at the estate. “I like her too. But you’re literally leaving no breathing space for another male, let alone two. I get the two of you spend a lot of time together, but maybe… you know… maybe you should back up a little.”
He’s probably right.
Dammit, why am I so protective of her when I’ve known from the start that she will choose three saikhs? I failed a lot of classes, but how to form a team with other males wasn’t one of them. Sharing a female seemed so easy… in theory.
But this isn’t a female.
It’s Izzy. My Izzy.
The woman who watches me cook, rubs my sore muscles after sparring, and watches me fight.
“Maybe we could, um—” Deep inhale. “She’s quick to relax with massages, and perhaps we could transition it into alternating kisses by pressing—”
“I know where to press, Adrin.” His voice is stern, but he gives a nod of approval. “It’s a good idea. Let’s go back inside, explain, kiss, and we take it from there.”
“Take it from there?” Anger burns inside me. I’m going to kill him. “You’re not veking her.”
He smacks his tongue. “Not tonight.”
Not ever, if I have a say in it.
But I don’t, do I?
“I have no troubles waiting until graduation,” he says. “Once that’s over, it will be up to Izzy to decide if I please her, when I please her, and how I please her. You’ll be her saikh, just like me, and whoever else she chooses.”
“I’ll be her first saikh.”
“What are you talking about? There’s no such thing as a first saikh.”
My hands fist by my sides in the same manner
they did during the fight when I spotted him touching Izzy. It caused such a flare of rage, I had my opponent down on the mat five seconds later. I’m tempted to do the same with Zorvik, disqualification be damned.
I force the strain from my fingers, uncurling them. “What Izzy and I have is… meaningful.”
Zorvik makes a noise at the back of his throat. “I figured you were in over your head when you challenged Cain, but I sure as vek didn’t expect it was this bad.”
“What are you talking about?”
His long exhale puffs into the dark night. “You have feelings for her. Damn, you might even be in love.”
That bile is back, bubbling up a storm at the back of my throat, turning me nauseous, turning me dizzy. Gods, I truly am the worst scholar of the entire pack, not only breaking one rule, but two. It all makes sense now.
I didn’t just make love to Izzy that night.
I am in love with her.
No wonder I want to punch everyone who comes near her, defending my female like I have since that very first night at the Horn Splitter. But what if she wants neither claiming nor defending?
The question turns my stomach, but it gets worse when Zorvik says, “Whatever you feel for her, bury it deep, Adrin. She will choose two more saikhs, and I want to be one of them.”
“She might not,” I choke out.
But of course she will, and I have no right to blame her. From the moment I met Izzy, she made her plan plenty clear. By the gods, I helped her achieve her goal, and introduced her to Zorvik. Even went as far as letting her meet Nena so she could familiarize herself with the idea of living with more than one male.
This entire time, I sabotaged myself in the name of friendship, although I want to be so much more. But I can’t be. Not if I truly love her. No idea what her contract states, but surely, she would have to give up her estate, and this sense of safety I know she requires. They might even send her off-planet and back to Agari II or Earth for all I know. How could I possibly expect her to sacrifice all that? For me. A male she’s known for all but a lunar cycle.