by Amy Brent
“That I might need your help on. I’m not aware of the cost of living around here and I want to make sure the child is secure.”
“Fair enough. So, let’s get into it, shall we?” He handed one packet to me and then the other to James, looking at us expectantly. “Reading is fundamental, after all.”
***
I had never been much for terms and conditions or other legalese, so when we finally finished reading, re-reading and rewording everything we wanted, it was well into the evening and time for dinner. I didn’t even want to guess at how much money this meeting was costing James, but like with everything else, money didn’t seem to be an object with him.
In fact, I didn’t want to think at all. My mind was chock full of insurance responsibilities, education clauses, standards of care of judiciary revision. I never knew there was so much involved in a custody agreement, but apparently it was a lot more than ‘you watch the kid for x amount of time and I’ll watch them for y’.
In the end, I felt like we had a solid arrangement drafted. And by solid, I meant absolutely phenomenal. To think I had been so stressed for so many months thinking about how I was going to survive and provide for my baby how I wanted, when in reality it just took a lawyer with a great knowledge of family court.
We decided I would have full time custody, but James would have unlimited visitation. If he wanted to take our child out of the state, he needed to give me twenty-four-hour notice, and if he wanted to take them out of the country, I required a week’s notice as well as a proof of return ticket. That last part had seemed absolutely silly to me, but the lawyer said that it was a standard clause to insure no child napping considering that 8 times out of 10 a missing child was taken by one of their parents.
If either of us was suspicious of the other not providing the care level that the child deserved, or otherwise abusing them, there was a mandatory procedure for what to do with a family psychologist and someone would come do interview with both parents. Hopefully that would never be an issue, but I was glad it was there nonetheless.
Then there was all the money. It was a lot of money. I had never once thought to look at James as a meal ticket, but I was sure that most of the people that he knew would.
There was a two thousand a month college payment that was going into a trust that neither the child or I could touch until they were eighteen. There was a hundred dollar a month food stipend, a hundred-dollar clothing stipend, a five hundred dollar back-to-school stipend in September, a thousand dollar birthday and Christmas stipend, complete insurance coverage, and -perhaps most importantly- a clause stating that James would cover all of my rent while I was living in a place of his choosing, and half rent if I moved into somewhere I liked.
No rent! No rent! Did he have any idea how much having five to seven hundred dollars more a month would do for me? I could save. Make sure that my child never wanted. They could get into after school activities and other extra curriculars, they could go on class trips. They would never know what it was like to have to duct tape the bottom of their shoes -unless that grew trendy in the next fifteen years or so. One could never know with fashion.
“Does these seem satisfactory to you?” James asked, looking at me with a soft expression on his face.
For someone who could be so intensely intimidating, he certainly didn’t make me feel frightened. In fact, he made me feel safer than I had in ages and I was pretty sure I was at the highest level of gratitude that a human could possibly be.
“Yes. Definitely,” I said, nearly breathless from the excitement in my chest. Could this really be happening? I kept waiting for the sky to fall or the ceiling to drop and end all of my good fortune.
“Great,” Trevor said. “So how about we get to signing?”
He handed each of us a pen and James signed right away. But all I could do is stare at the paper, wondering if either of these guys knew how much this was going to completely change my life.
They couldn’t know. Could they? It didn’t seem likely.
“Are you alright?” James asked, sensing my hesitancy.
“Yeah,” I murmured. “Just thinking.” I took a deep breath, signing my name underneath his, and the next thing I knew, I was legally set up to have an amazing life.
“There we are,” Trevor said, collecting the papers. I’ll have this copied in triplicate and authenticated then I’ll send a packet to each of you and keep one on file.”
With a sort of finality that I could explain, he got up, put the papers in his briefcase, then walked to the door.
“After the two of you, of course.”
Oh, I guessed that was our cue to go and stood, heading out right after James. I didn’t know what to say, hell, I hardly knew what to think but I was intrinsically aware at how amazing this all had turned out for me.
We headed out to his car and I really tried to think of what to say that could possibly convey everything I meant to say. How happy, grateful and guilty I was.
“Sorry,” I said finally as we clambered into the car.
“Sorry for what?” He sounded genuinely surprised and I could have smacked myself for my lame lead in.
“For running. I should have tried to find you. I was just so sure that you were a needle in a haystack and even if I did find you, that you would definitely be against me having this child.”
“I wish you hadn’t too, but I understand your reasons. What’s done is done, and the important thing is that we move forward. You’re having this child, and I don’t want to be an absentee dad. And I also don’t want to have tension between us, even if we are getting divorced.”
“I… thank you. Really. You don’t know what this means to me.”
“Well, I have a bit of an idea. But I get what you mean.” We both let out a long breath at the same time and that made us both laugh, breaking the tension between us. It went on for a minute or two, before simmering down. But one question I was left with was…what now?
“Hold on one moment,” James said, ask if he had read my mind. “I need to make a call.”
“By all means,” I said, putting on my seatbelt and settling in. “I’m in no rush. I don’t have any place to go.”
He nodded and was already dialing. I listened, able to hear the voice on the other end much better, and it only took a couple of seconds for me to pick up that it was some sort of real estate agency.
“Hey, Stacy, I have a sort of special request for you.”
“And what’s that Mr. Hines?”
“I need you to find me a modest two-bedroom apartment in St. Louis, preferably by a reputable school district.”
“Of course. Any reason why?”
“Diversifying my portfolio,” he said quickly in a way that very clearly got across that he wasn’t going to discus it further.
“Absolutely, Mr. Hines. I’ll have those to you by next weekend.”
“Try tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow.”
“I… of course Mr. Hines. I appreciate the challenge. If you don’t mind, I’ll get on that right now.”
“Of course, you have a good day Stacy.”
He hung up and I raised one of my eyebrows at him. “Huh, you really were stern with her.”
But he just shrugged, looking pleased as he tucked his phone away. “That’s just how you have to be with Stacy. We’ve worked together for years and she’s always had a… peculiar way of being motivated.” I wanted to ask him exactly what he meant by that, because it was raising all sorts of hmmm bells in my head, but he was already moving on. “I’m starving though. Do you want to go to… I don’t know, the local mall or something and hit up the food court then go shopping for baby supplies.”
I chuckled, before realizing that he was serious. “Wait, have you ever had fast food a day in your life?”
“Of course I have,” he laughed slightly. “Why?”
“Because your abs are telling me another story full of organic foods, egg whites and lean
meat.”
“Thank you for noticing,” he said, sending me that smirk that had my cheeks blushing. “But I do indulge occasionally.”
“Well then by all means,” I said, repeating a phrase that was becoming more and more common in my daily lexicon. “Let’s go to the mall.”
Chapter Seventeen
~James~
A lot had happened in one day, so it felt strange that so little time had actually passed. It was just passing six and somehow I had gone from casually helping Nicole look at apartments, to filling out custody paperwork, to finding her a place that I was going to be paying for.
And, despite the fact that I knew some people would think that I was being absolutely taken for a ride, I was happy about it. Nicole had really opened up to me in the day since I had confronted her, and I had the feeling that she never quite could catch a break. I was certainly in the place to do so, and I wasn’t going to miss the money, so why not?
I couldn’t describe the look on her face when she realized what was going on. It was like Jesus himself had descended and given her a one-way ticket to heaven. It made me feel good, and alpha. I was protecting the woman who was carrying my child inside of her, and I was going to do it right.
I felt energized as we reached the mall, mind full of all the things we had to do. There were baby clothes, insurance, cribs, bottles, and that was just the stuff I knew about. As a die-hard bachelor, I was sure that there was an entire world of supplies that I knew nothing about.
I was definitely going to need to do some research before we got too deep in and we had to rush. If there was one thing I hated, it was rushing due to lack of preparation. One didn’t build a billion-dollar company by being unprepared.
“So, you have any cravings?” I asked, crossing around the vehicle to try to open her door. But just like the previous time, she was already out of the car before I could get there.
“Tacos,” she said adamantly, like there wasn’t a sliver of doubt in her mind.
“Alright. Tacos it is.”
We headed inside, and I was greeted by so much noise and clamor that I had to blink for a moment. I guess that it had been a year or two since I had been in the mall and I forgot how loud they could be. I was sure I would get used to it, but it was certainly jarring.
Nicole buzzed straight for the closest texmex place and I followed after her, figuring I would just order whatever she did. But then the line was ridiculously long and I wasn’t really comfortable with her waiting that long.
“Hey, why don’t you give me your order and I then you find a seat while I stand in line.”
She looked at me with such huge eyes that I had to wonder what kind of people she knew before me. Standing in line for her was not a big deal and should be expected when one person was pregnant and the other was not, and yet with the way she was looking at me, it was hard not to think I was some sort of saint.
“Really?”
“Yes, really.” I handed her my phone. “Just type it in here and try to find someplace tucked away to sit.”
“Wow. Okay.” She quickly texted away then handed my phone back before walking off, still looking over her shoulder occasionally as if she was worried I was just pranking her and was going to walk out at any moment.
It was strange how protective of her that made me feel. She was a nice woman; it didn’t make sense for her to have been treated so poorly by others her whole life. When she told me about her parents, I could tell there was a lot she left out, and I didn’t press. If she was ready, she would tell me. But even if she wasn’t quite there yet, I could see the scars of what people did in her actions.
Like how grateful she was for everything. While appreciation was always nice, it made me angry to see how surprised she was by it. Like it was ludicrous that someone would want to help her. But, it also made me wonder about what would happen to her when I left after she was settled into her new place.
She didn’t have the support of her friends, from how she acted at the office I could surmise that she wasn’t close to any of them there. I knew she didn’t have her parents support, so that meant once I left, she would be completely alone.
Was it strange to worry about her being lonely when the entire point of me coming down here was to get a divorce? Maybe. I didn’t know. It wasn’t like our situation was common and came with an instructional video.
“Hello sir, may I take your order?”
“What?” Oh, I hadn’t even realized that I had reached the counter. That was certainly a surprise. Quickly, I rattled off what she had put into my phone and then just ordered the same thing for myself. Minus the soda, of course.
I had been quite the pop-fiend when I was a child, and my reward had been several cavities. I had quit in my teens, but I was well aware that a single order of soda was probably enough to have me relapse. Besides, water was pretty delicious.
About five minutes later, I had a tray loaded with junk food and I was headed towards the center of the food court.
Perhaps it was strange that I was willing to eat at such a place, but honestly it was a bit novel every once and a while. It reminded me of the cafeterias at school, where all of us kids would sit closer to each other than necessary while we ate food, talked trash and played trading cards.
I spotted Nicole over in the corner. True to what I had asked, she found a seat that as about as far away from the lines and hubbub as it could be. As I walked toward her, I couldn’t help but notice again how radiant she was.
Even without a drop of makeup, her cheeks were glowing a slight pink, her lashes were long, and her lips were curled into a happy smile that filled me with a sort of warmth that I wasn’t used to.
I sat down, and she dug in with a sort of eagerness I wasn’t used to seeing. Most of the women I went to meals with were models, starlets or aspiring personalities who were contractually obligated to maintain a certain weight. I guessed it was good for me to know someone who was so completely outside of the realm of what I was used to.
“You probably think I’m gross,” she said with a laugh, inhaling a burrito which was just downright impressive.
“Not at all,” I answered honestly. “Do you think any less of me for already being full?”
“What? You’re kidding me.”
“Unfortunately, no. I’m about halfway through my order and I think that’s about as far as I’m gonna get.”
“Weak,” she teased.
But instead of being patronizing, it was endearing, and I chuckled a bit. “You’re possibly the only person to call me that in years.”
“Well good. You’ve probably surrounded yourself with too many yes men and you need someone like me to bring your head back down to the ground.”
“Well, if we’re talking about you bringing my head anywhere, you’ve already proved you’re quite good at givi-”
She choked on her food and I reached over to pat her back, concern overwriting the joke I had been about to tell. “Dude,” she said once she could breathe again. “You gotta warn me if you’re gonna slam down something like that. I just about died.”
“Quite literally, it seems.” I said, still a bit worried. That coughing had been pretty hard, what if something was stuck in her throat?
“Whoo boy. It’s almost enough to put me off my food.”
“Oh really?” I countered, feeling the shock fade and slipping back into our banter. “Well I guess that I can just throw this all away then.” I said, gathering up the rest of the food.
But she quickly caught my wrist and sent me an intense look. “I said almost.” She managed to hold her glare for about ten seconds before it broke, and then we were both chuckling at our silliness.
We sank into a loose conversation as she finished eating. Although I was pleased that she was helping herself, it did make me worry about how little she must have been eating lately to be so hungry. Was the baby alright? Was it getting all the nutrition it needed?
I supposed there was no way of knowing what had ha
ppened before, but I would make sure that our little bean was appropriately fed from now on.
When we finished, I found myself almost a little sad. While normally I would try to get out of the mall after half an hour or so and the novelty of it faded, I found myself wanting to stay.
“So, baby shopping then?”
“Actually,” she said, folding up all her trash so it made a very neat little pile in the center of our tray. “I think it’s a bit too soon for that. We don’t know the dimensions of the place that I’m going to be living, or even the sex of the little bean.”
Huh. I was disappointed. Now that was an emotion that I wasn’t expecting. Quickly, my brain scrambled to try to think of a reason to prolong our time out and about together.
“Well, what about a registry.”
Her eyes did that cute realization thing they did, and she nodded slowly. “You know, that actually sounds like a great idea.”
“Thanks. I’m full of them.”
“Full of something,” she retorted, standing up and grabbing the tray. Quickly I took it from her, taking it to the trashcan myself.
“I’m not helpless, you know,” she said, following along behind me.
“I am aware,” I said, tossing the stuff away into the appropriate bins. “But just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should have to. I’m not the one carrying a fetus, so I should be the one opening doors for you, taking out trash and the like. You can do all of this when I’ve gone back to the office.”