She didn’t have time to go to jail.
She was outside on the patio that overlooked the award-winning golf course, but she didn’t see any of the beauty. She was too damn mad to see anything. Ugh. Sweat pooled between her breasts, and her clothes clung to her body. It was still hot and muggy, even though the dinner hour was well underway, and she swatted at a fly that got too close. The voices inside, a dull buzz out here, should have soothed her mind, but not tonight.
The charity golf tournament had been a huge success, with hundreds, if not a couple of thousand, willing to pay to watch a bunch of celebrities hit the links. The silent auction had run throughout the day, with the live auction still to go. The recipient of the funds raised was to be announced just before the live auction—a tradition for the now yearly event. However, Chance had told her just a few minutes earlier where the money was going.
Green Thumbs for the Soul. It was cause near and dear to her heart, and she was pissed right off that Chance had ruined what should have been an absolute thrill.
Chance. Her teeth ground together so hard, her jaw ached. She tried to relax, but it was no use. Her cellphone rang, and she pulled it from the front pocket of her shorts. It was Sidney. Ruby wasn’t in the mood to talk to anyone at the moment, but she knew her girlfriend would keep calling, or worse…come and find her.
“Hey,” Ruby answered, trying hard to keep her voice neutral.
“Where are you? Dinner has started.”
“I’m on my way. I just had something to take care of.”
A pause.
“You sound weird.”
Ruby could picture the wheels turning inside her friend’s brain. “I’m good.”
“Good at lying.”
“Sid…I just need a moment.”
“Hey,” Sidney’s voice softened. “Travis isn’t at our table so you don’t have to worry about, you know, having to see him.”
At least that was something.
“Though he seemed sort of nice today. I mean…” Sidney stumbled over her words. “He kind of surprised me.”
“I don’t want to talk about Travis. I don’t…” She swore and blinked rapidly as tears threatened.
“I knew you sounded weird.” There was a muffled noise as if Sidney moved her phone. “What happened? What did Travis do?”
The anger inside Ruby boiled fast and hard. She so didn’t want to get into it, but she couldn’t seem to help herself. “Travis didn’t do anything. For once. This is all on Chance. He put us with Travis and Zach because he…” She still couldn’t believe it. “Because he was testing me.” She made a strangled sound. “Testing me. He said he wanted to make sure there were no feelings between me and Trav. Who the hell does something like that?” She rolled her head back and spied a hawk flying low over the trees. The large bird arced high and then floated on the breeze. Its solitary flight pulled at her, making her heart heavy.
“Son-of-a……” Ruby could hear the surprise in her friend’s voice. “He’s obviously insecure.”
“Ya think? God. I don’t even know what to say. I just feel so…”
“Upset?”
“Yep.”
“Pissed off?”
“Yes.”
“Betrayed?”
She nodded. “Exactly.”
There was a pause and her head filled with the sound of her own labored breathing. If anyone was in the immediate area they’d think she’d just run the Boston marathon.
“Do you think that maybe, even though he was totally wrong, I mean seriously wrong…But do you think that he kind of has a point?”
“What the hell does that mean?” Was everyone in her life lining up to kick her when she was feeling so damn vulnerable?
“Maybe there is unfinished business between you two.”
“I can’t believe you just said that.” She tried to keep the hurt from her voice. Sidney was her person. She should know better.
“Do you want me to be honest?”
“Of course I do but—“
“There’s something there between you guys. I don’t know what it is. Vibes maybe?”
“Vibes?” The word exploded like a shot and echoed over the course. “Are we talking singular or were there more than one?” Her sarcasm was scathing. “I barely talked to Travis.”
“It wasn’t the talking, Ruby. It was the way you looked at him. And the way he looked at you while you were busy ignoring him.”
Okay. Sidney was her best friend. And while Sidney wasn’t a huge fan of Chance (he wore too many pastels and carried a toothpick everywhere) she hated Travis.
Ruby swore under her breath. Maybe hate was a strong word, but Sid disliked him just as much as she disliked canned peas, and that was a lot. She was on Ruby’s side. But her last comment sure as hell sounded as if she was standing on the other side of the fence.
“Ruby?”
“I can’t do this right now.”
“I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“Well you did.”
There was a pause.
“I’m sorry.”
“Look, don’t worry about me, Sid. I’ll be there in a bit.” Ruby pocketed her cell and headed for the bar. She needed to calm her nerves before she opened her mouth and said something she was going to regret. Right now, the only person she wouldn’t piss off was Mister Jack Daniels.
Thankfully, there were several bars in the large banquet room, and she made her way to the smallest one in the corner, not far from where she’d walked in off the terrace. Large green tropical plants gave some kind of cover, and she felt free of prying eyes. A young woman with dark hair and eyes was busy cutting lemons and limes as she approached. She wore a crisp conservative white blouse, which only managed to emphasize the colorful tattoos adorning her right arm. Creamy skin, large luminous eyes, and bright red lips gave the woman an exotic look.
“What can I get you?” Her voice held a rasp that Ruby liked, the words cradled in a soft Southern lilt.
“Jack and coke.”
Her perfectly arched eyebrow shot up. “Not diet?”
“Hell no,” Ruby said. “I want the real deal.”
“Okay.” The woman got busy with the drink, and after garnishing it with a lime, she handed over the glass.
“Do I know you?” Ruby asked, curious. The woman looked familiar, but she couldn’t place her. She definitely wasn’t a townie.
She didn’t answer right away, and Ruby got the impression she was mulling over her words, deciding how much information she was going to give. And that made Ruby wonder.
“Honey,” she said after a while, her voice even.
“What?” Ruby was confused.
“My name is Honey.”
“For real?” Ruby blushed as the words fell out of her mouth. “Sorry. That sounded rude. My filter seems to have been lost on the golf course.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Honey replied. “I realized about ten minutes after I arrived in this lovely town that my name was going to confuse you folks.”
“I’m Ruby.” She took a sip from her glass, grateful to have something to take her mind off Travis. “Do you have relatives in town?”
Honey’s head jerked up. “Why do you ask that?”
Ruby swirled the amber liquid in her tumbler. “I guess I was just wondering why you would move here from down South is all. I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“I don’t have any relatives. I pretty much hopped in my car and ended up here by accident.”
“Oh?”
“My car died.”
“Oh. That sucks.” Ruby studied the woman as she got busy cleaning the bar. There was something about her. Her eyes? The voice? “Do you work for the golf club?”
Honey shook her head. “No. I heard some of the organizers talking about this event a few weeks back, and they needed volunteers. When I found out what they were doing with the money raised, I said I’d help out.”
“That’s big of you,” Ruby replied, truly touched by the
woman’s actions.
“Not really. My mother was an addict, so…” She shrugged and moved a few paces away to serve an elderly gentleman holding two empty glasses of wine. When Honey had served the customer, she nodded to Ruby’s near-empty glass.
“No.” Ruby downed the last bit and set the tumbler on the bar. “I have to be good.”
“Being good is overrated.” Honey half smiled as she reached for Ruby’s glass.
It hit Ruby then. She had seen this woman before. “You work at the Coach House.”
Honey nodded. “I do.”
“I used to go there a lot when I was younger.” An image flashed through her mind. Soft summer rain. Dark parking lot. Travis. Skin on skin. Steel against her back. Lips on her neck. Hands between her legs. Music from inside the Coach House drifting on the air.
“When you were younger.” Honey made a face. “When was that, five years ago?”
“More like ten,” Ruby said slowly, eyes moving over the crowd, searching for the one person she shouldn’t be searching for. She found Travis almost immediately. He was sitting with the Bergens and their little boy. Patrick’s head rested against Travis’s chest, and her breath caught when Travis turned his head, a smile meant for the boy, still on his face. Their eyes caught and held until she looked away, throat tight, heart aching.
“So you work for Nash,” she found herself saying as she turned away from the past, half listening to Honey’s response.
“What was that?” Honey had spoken, but for the life of her, she had no idea what the woman had said. Pay attention. Easier said than done with the image of Travis and Patrick burned into her brain.
“Nash. He’s an arrogant prick sometimes.”
“Right,” she murmured. “Aren’t they all?” Her answer was automatic, and with some effort, she focused on the bartender.
Honey nodded. “Most of ’em.” She tossed her rag. “Nash is also way too opinionated for his own good. And most of the time, his opinions are the exact opposite of mine. So…” Honey scooped up the rag she’d just tossed. “It makes it hard to work sometimes.” She paused, eyebrows raised exaggeratedly. “All the time.”
“Why don’t you quit?”
“I needed a job, and he was hiring. Right now, I’m where I’m supposed to be, even though sometimes I don’t like it.”
“I hear ya there,” Ruby murmured, eyes drawn to Travis once more.
“Do you know the Blackwells?”
That question turned Ruby’s head right back around. “Everyone does.”
“I met the hockey player earlier, Travis. I just wondered if you knew the family well.”
Something unpleasant bloomed inside Ruby’s chest. It flushed her skin and made her breath quicken. Was Honey interested in Travis? Her eyes fell away. Why did that bother her?
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry.”
Ruby found herself shaking her head and stepping back. “No. It’s fine. The Blackwells are pretty much royalty around here. Their roots are deep. Generations deep. The boys are…” She stumbled over her words. “Hudson’s a great guy, and Wyatt is too.”
“And the hockey player?”
“I used to be married to him.”
She saw the surprise in Honey’s eyes but didn’t wait for a response. No way could she eat, but she could drink. Honey was right. Being good was overrated. She grabbed a bottle of white wine and a glass from one of the tables and headed back outside. The sun was setting, the corners were in shadow, and she could disappear for a while.
Which was exactly what she did until the reason for her bad mood walked his ass onto the terrace and didn’t stop walking until he stood a couple of inches from her chair. She leaned back and gazed up at him. Like always, her body reacted. Her breathing quickened. Her palms sweated. Her heart ached.
Even now. After all this time and all the pain between them. It was both unfair and inconvenient.
“Why are you here?” The words slipped from her lips, the tone aggressive and hard.
Travis didn’t answer right away. He ran a hand through the mess of hair on top of his head and then shoved his fists into the front pockets of his shorts. His handsome face was somber, those dark eyes of his intent.
“I wanted you to know it wasn’t me who picked our foursome. I wouldn’t do that to you.”
“You already told me that.”
She sat straighter, wanting to lash out because all that pain she insisted on remembering, well, it was there nestled between her heart and her mind. It was big and ugly, and thank God, its shadow concealed everything else. The want. The yearning. The need for all those things she could never have.
“Why are you here?” she repeated, spitting out the words like venom.
Travis opened his mouth to answer but then closed it for several moments as he watched her. “I came to apologize.”
“For what?” She got to her feet and nearly upended the small table holding the half-empty bottle of wine.
“For everything.”
“What makes you think I care to hear it? Or accept it for that matter?”
“I’m not the same guy I was, Ruby.”
“And I’m not the same woman. Guess we’re even on that score.”
“I want to make things right between us.”
“To ease your conscience?” She took a step closer, her body now shaking.
The anger in her was like a category five hurricane. It was strong and swift and all-consuming. She moved to him, her hands at her sides, small fists that wanted nothing more than to hurt him. Hurt something. Anything to deflect what she was feeling.
“No.” He swore. “Maybe? I just want the chance to make up for all the things I ruined. For ruining us.”
She laughed in his face, but it wasn’t anything to do with joy. “Us? Do you mean you and me? Or You, me, and Nathan.”
His eyes widened, and something flickered in their depths. Was it shame? Sadness? Pain? Did she care?
Ruby spoke slowly so that there was no way he could misunderstand the meaning of her words.
“You gave up on us. On me. You were the one who went away.”
“Ruby, I was young and stupid and selfish. I’m not those things anymore. Let me prove it to you. Let me show you.”
“There’s no point, Trav.”
“I think there is.”
“You’re still so damn sure of yourself.”
He was slowly nodding, and something about the way he was looking at her made her heart squeeze harder. “Because I’m right.”
“Not this time, cowboy. No way in hell would I ever consider letting you back into my life.” She had to take a moment. “You gave up that right when you walked out. When you went about your life like nothing happened.” Her voice broke. “Like Nathan never happened.”
His nostrils flared, and his eyes narrowed. If Ruby had been on her game, she would have noticed those things. She would have known that she’d finally pressed a button that maybe she shouldn’t have pressed. At least, not here on the terrace of the Crystal Lake Golf and Country Club.
“That’s low.”
Her chin jutted out. “It’s true.”
“Your truth needs a little tweaking. I’m willing to take my fair share of hits for the crap that went down. But I’m not a hundred percent to blame for the shit marriage we had. I know about the pills, Ruby. I know you stopped taking them. You got pregnant on purpose.”
His words sliced through her like a knife through butter. Shocked, she could only stare at him like an idiot. She was going to cry and make a complete ass of herself, and right now, breaking down in front of Travis wasn’t something she could handle. She needed to get away from him. Needed to make the memories stop. Make his words go away.
If only for a moment. She just needed a moment.
Ruby took a step, hoping to move past him without another word spoken between them.
His hand reached for her, but she sidestepped.
He made a strangled sound. “I think abou
t Nathan. I need you to know that. I just didn’t know how to handle things back then. How to handle us. You were so…broken. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you. Jesus, you were my world. The only thing that kept me going when my own life was shit.” He was close now. So close. His warm breath fell on her cheek. His scent filled her nostrils. His pain fed her own.
“Don’t touch me.” She barely got the words out. The anger was long gone; instead, she was filled with panic. Filled with dark thoughts of a past she wanted to remain buried. Because he was right. She’d done things. Things she wasn’t proud of.
“Why? Because you’re afraid of what you’ll feel?”
God, she was cold. And confused. And tired. Her heart ached because of the pain, but also because of the guilt. She looked Travis in the eye, as clarity hit her square in the gut.
“I’m not afraid, Travis. I’m terrified.” Her voice broke, and Ruby shoved past Travis, disappearing into the darkness.
Chapter 9
“About time you showed up.” Darlene Atwell stared over the top of her trendy leopard glasses and continued to stir the contents of a large pot. The Blackwell home smelled like heaven, though the only person in sight was the woman who’d helped raise the Blackwell boys after their mother died, and the woman who’d fallen in love with their father.
“Is that goulash?” Travis sniffed the air, eyes warming as he watched Darlene.
“It is.”
“Man, I haven’t had that in ages.”
“I know.”
He walked into the kitchen and dropped a kiss to her cheek. It was his brother Hudson’s, birthday, and along with the goulash, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d been present. Not surprising on account of their history. But he was trying. “Sorry I’m late. Where is everybody?”
“Wyatt took Regan out on the boat, but Hudson and Becca are down at the boathouse with your father. He hasn’t let that baby out of his sight.” She set the ladle down on the counter and turned to him, her face beaming. “I’m just so damn glad all you boys are here. And so is John.”
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