by Chris Duffin
I’ve had a very unusual life. While I wouldn’t change a thing about my experiences, let’s be clear that you don’t need to emulate the craziness of my life to do great things. If there’s one lesson that I want you to take from my story, it’s that you can choose what matters to you and pursue it with passion, despite your circumstances. The reason I’ve told you where I come from is that I want you to understand and believe how far it’s possible to move the needle. If I can go from being a poor boy, sleeping in a wilderness shack through the depths of winter, to one of the strongest men in the world, helping thousands of people, what can you do?
Many Types of Strength
I’m known globally as a creator and purveyor of strength education and products. This book, however, fills a gap. It enables me to talk about the other, equally important aspects of strength that aren’t covered by the work I do with Kabuki Strength. These are the mental, emotional, and even spiritual elements that make strength a universal virtue, worthy of pursuit by all.
Strength is your capacity to bend your will to living the life you choose. Marie Curie wisely said: “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something and that this thing must be attained.” Life gives each of us our fair share of opportunities to experience challenge and hardship, whether we ask for them or not. These are valuable, important moments that we can use to grow stronger, to adapt, and to persevere. Sometimes strength can be the difference between life and death.
Perseverance is action derived from a pure belief in your own strength, even in what seems like total defeat. Just like Pat and my father, I struggled with alcohol. I’ve stepped close to the edge, lured by the deceitful whispers of the devil who promises that ending it all will bring comfort. My redemption has been a powerful self-realization that my identity is not found in my circumstances or in what happens to me. I am strong. I am my own will made manifest in the world.
As you grow in self-awareness, your understanding of your strengths becomes more precise. Be intentional. Take the time to explore your passions and figure out which strengths you most want to cultivate. I don’t want you to settle for the role of consumer in this world. I urge you to master the necessary skills to contribute in a meaningful fashion, and to use those skills to make a difference in your own life and the lives of others. It’s far too easy to fall into the trap of working a job you hate and living for the weekend. Find a way of breaking out of that paradigm. Don’t be afraid of trying hard. Don’t be afraid of failing or looking like an idiot. There are no prizes for being cool and collected, but achieving nothing of value. Leave your mark on the world.
Grow your strengths through purposeful and diligent practice. Your personal evolution is rooted in perpetual action and reaction—the antithesis of complacency. You never know when something will click into place and you’ll fall in love with a discipline that can change your life. On a whim, I decided to compete in a strength competition, thinking it would be an interesting one-off experience. Instead, I enjoyed years of competitive powerlifting, held numerous world records, and now harness my love of the iron to perform feats of strength and support causes I believe in. I could have held back, worried because I wasn’t sure how to perform a deadlift. If I’d done that, I might never have taken part in a sport that has become a cornerstone of my life.
You don’t need to be good at something before you try it, but you must be resolute in your efforts when you choose to master something. Mediocrity is the ugly, fatal disease of wasted potential and eternal regret. In the words of Dante Aligheri:
And I—my head oppressed by horror—said: “Master, what is it that I hear? Who are those people so defeated by their pain?” And he to me: “This miserable way is taken by the sorry souls of those who lived without disgrace and without praise. They now commingle with the coward angels, the company of those who were not rebels nor faithful to their God, but stood apart. The heavens, that their beauty not be lessened, have cast them out, nor will deep Hell receive them. Even the wicked cannot glory in them.”
In practice and in heart, I regularly repeat these four words: “There is always more.” Perfection is not our destination. Instead, we follow the never-ending trail of joy and tears, knowing full well that it has no end. The alternative is unacceptable.
As you persevere and find success, the sweet voice of praise from your own mind and those around you will whisper, “You are amazing. You did it.” Acknowledge that voice, but don’t allow it to seduce you. Instead of dwelling on my successes, I see clearly the areas where I’m still growing and improving. However good you think you are, you can always be better. This is the nature of ceaseless self-improvement—you can always dig a little deeper, work a little harder, and push a little further than before. There is always more.
Prioritization in Reverse
My approach to prioritization is different from most. I don’t start with a list of all the things I need to accomplish, then try to pack as many of them as I can into my day. Instead, I start by determining what’s not essential. What fluff can I cut out of my life? What pointless tasks can I say “no” to today? If you try to make everything a priority, your only success will be in making a really nice list. When the nonessential is stripped away, that which is truly crucial to your life emerges. Be critical and honest about how you spend your time, because it’s yours to lose.
Your relationships—the people you choose to invest in and be vulnerable with—are among the most valuable and important components of your value system. Choose them wisely. There is little virtue in being a people pleaser, and the quality of your relationships matters far more than the quantity. Don’t be afraid to cut those connections that aren’t aligned with your vision, supporting you, or challenging you to become better. Sour relationships bring a great emotional burden. When they are gone, you will be armed with a newfound freedom and energy to invest in those you choose. The key is to separate real needs from what is merely convenient, or worse, counterproductive. There are only twenty-four short hours in a day: are you using your time and mental resources wisely?
I am convinced that many people spend 80 percent of their time doing meaningless things that add little real value to their lives. Blissfully unaware, life lives them. Discipline starts when you stop wasting your life doing stupid things. Make an honest, detailed inventory of your days over the course of a week. Is how you spend your time reflective of your values and your vision? Cut out the waste, and you’ll be amazed at how much time you have to act on your vision. It’s not easy and it takes a lot of discipline. I don’t get to follow every whim or do everything I want to. The pay-off, however, is that I go to sleep every night with full confidence that I am fully alive and doing the work required to go where I want to go. Don’t half-ass everything, whole-ass what really matters.
Find your vision and use it as a north star, faithfully guiding your actions and helping you to discern what you most need to engage in. Bringing a vision to fruition takes time in the trenches, doing hard, unpleasant work that will wear you down. Despair and defeat will lurk silently in the corners, waiting to pounce. There will be times when you feel as though you’re working harder than everyone around you and still not moving forward. Through thick and thin, always keep in mind that action aligned with vision will bear fruit.
As we discussed in chapter four, there is a stark distinction between a dream and a vision. Everyone dreams. Some of us even live in dreams. To have vision is to know who you are, what you value, and what you need to do. It is an understanding of the work that is to come and a willingness to undertake that work.
What to Do Next
As this book draws to a close, I have some homework for you. On the following pages, you will find a worksheet consisting of six foundational questions I want you to ask yourself. Find some moments of solitude, peer deep into your heart, and put ink on
paper in the space provided. One of the great gifts of self-reflection is that it comes with an inbuilt lie detector. You will know if you are lying to yourself.
There’s no hiding place in life. If you fabricate your answers, you will only cheat yourself. Be honest.
What excites you in life?
What value can you add to the world? What contribution can you make?
What do you want to learn?
What type of people do you want around you?
How do you want to spend your time?
What challenges do you need to overcome?
It’s a bit harder to be dishonest with yourself in writing, isn’t it? Keep this book and the answers you have written nearby; reading them will serve you well during inevitable moments of weakness and discouragement. If you are comfortable sharing your answers with me, and me alone, please email them to [email protected]. You can also download additional worksheets from my website.
A Final Request
My intent is for this book to leave you different than it found you. There is power in story, and my hope is that these words will inspire you and radically alter your perceptions about what’s possible in your life. If you’ve found value in these pages, I have one small request of you. Please share this book with others.
The best way to do that is with a personal recommendation. Lend your copy of the book to someone you think will benefit from it or buy it as a gift for a friend’s birthday. If there is someone that immediately comes to mind as a person who needs to read this book, buy them a copy. If your hunch is right, your gift may mean more to them than you’ll ever know.
Feel free to reach out to me on social media, too. I’m on Instagram, at @mad_scientist_duffin, and also on LinkedIn. You can also contact me via my company website, kabukistrength.com, or my personal website, christopherduffin.com, where you can also subscribe to my newsletter.
In my guise as the Mad Scientist of Strength, I cohost the Strength Chat podcast with the Wizard of Training and the esteemed Doctor Rudolph. You can find us on all the popular podcast platforms.
Here’s to your strength.
Acknowledgments
While I lacked mentors or role models in my earlier years and was mostly left to figure out the world on my own, it would be remiss of me not to acknowledge the influence my parents had on my life. Like the rest of us, they were a long way from perfect. Nonetheless, I’m forever grateful for the positive qualities they instilled in me during those formative years. My mother gave me strength, a powerful work ethic, perseverance, and an indomitable will to forge my own path in the world. My father taught me to be passionate about life and to wholeheartedly pursue the things that bring me meaning and joy. My stepfather taught me the spirit of living in the moment and enjoying life as it comes. Collectively, they instilled in me the importance of intellectual, physical, and creative pursuits.
My first mentor was my wrestling coach, Rusty Zysset, who saw past my rough outward appearance and invested in me. He encouraged me, supported me, and taught me that there is no shortcut to success in life. He made sure I understood that the discipline we practice molds and shapes us, even when no one else is looking.
Rudy Kadlub is my business partner, with whom I co-founded Kabuki Strength. More than that, he is my close friend and mentor. Rudy has taught me much about business, life, and family—wisdom I strive constantly to emulate. I can’t imagine working to build a legacy with anyone else, and I trust him with my life. He is a father figure for me as an adult, and I cherish our relationship.
Huge gratitude goes out to a number of mentors who gave me a shot as I transitioned from the manufacturing industry to the world of biomechanics, strength, and performance. These individuals taught me much, supported me, and opened doors for me to grow even before I was known in the public sphere. Dr. Phillip Snell tops the list, along with Dr. Stuart McGill, Dr. Craig Liebenson, and Dr. Kelly Starrett. I’m honored that these brilliant and influential professionals now serve on the advisory board of Kabuki Strength.
Dave Tate of EliteFTS has been a constant source of guidance as I transitioned into the strength industry and worked to build Kabuki Strength. Mark Bell was the first person to push me in this direction and has actively encouraged me for more than a decade. I’m thankful to both of these noble and successful men for inspiring and supporting me.
Without the help of the team at Scribe Media, Rob Wolf Petersen, and Andrei Miclea, I wouldn’t have been able to complete this book in a manner that does the story and message justice.
Last, but by no means least, I want to thank the incredible people who make up our team at Kabuki Strength. We’ve never really hired people the traditional way using job postings or recruiters. Instead, we’ve discovered that if we express our mission, values, and vision in all of our actions, the right people will find us. Rudy and I have enjoyed long careers as leaders, and without hesitation we agree that Kabuki Strength’s employees are unparalleled when it comes to commitment, skill, and passion. It is an incredible feeling to work with a group of people who share a common goal, and who eagerly invest their time and energy into our vision of making the world a better place through strength. I can’t thank each of them enough for their inexhaustible dedication and diligence.
About the Author
Chris Duffin is the co-founder and chief engineer at Kabuki Strength, an organization devoted to optimizing human performance and making the world a better place through strength. He previously worked as a corporate executive and has turned around automotive, aerospace, heavy equipment, and high-tech manufacturing industries.
Chris was previously ranked number one in the world in various powerlifting disciplines and has held numerous world records. Now retired, he is known for his industry-changing innovations and education in the strength and clinical worlds. He’s a leading speaker on topics related to strength and human movement, and performs insane feats of strength to help charities and organizations whose work he believes in.