All her worries faded away in a wave of sensation. Nothing had ever felt so good. She wanted to stay here for ever, doing just this.
But it seemed William was not as lost to the feeling as she was.
He lifted his head and looked down at her. She swallowed, unable to think of anything to say.
‘Thank you for the tour, Ave. I think I’ve seen enough for today.’
And with that he dropped his arms, swept the arras to one side and stepped out into the corridor beyond.
The material of the tapestry quickly fell back into place, leaving Avva cocooned, alone, in the small alcove. Her lips were still tingling from William’s touch. She reached up and ran her fingertips over them, the scent of him still clinging to her skin. She closed her eyes tightly. What had she just done?
Chapter Seven
William hurried out of the castle, his heart pounding as his thoughts swirled.
The overheard conversation confirmed that Barwen and Thomas were planning something, something which involved getting William out of the way, which probably only meant one thing. William’s fears were confirmed—the King was in danger. William’s whole life had been building towards this moment. All his training, the fealty he’d sworn to his brothers-in-arms and his liege, it was all worthless if he didn’t act now.
And yet...
And yet, that wasn’t at the forefront of his mind. Every time he tried to bring it to the front his thoughts scattered off in an entirely different direction.
That kiss, the one that should never have happened. The one he had been imagining ever since he’d met Ave two days ago. The one which he had sworn would never happen and the one which he had taken as soon as the opportunity had presented itself. It had rocked him to the core.
He’d kissed women before. In his youth he’d have said he was something of an expert at it, but never had he experienced the bone-weakening desire he’d felt when Ave’s hand had brushed his stomach. All thought of potential plots against the King had vanished from his mind like puffs of smoke.
He’d been fighting his desire for Ave from the moment they’d first met.
Hell, he’d never wanted someone so badly. His dreams had been plagued with images of her limbs wrapped around him, of his name on her lips.
While his mind had tried to concentrate on the puzzle of this town, his body had betrayed him, leaving him hot and heavy from wanting her.
Before he’d seen her delicate curves in the moonlight, he hadn’t even been sure she was female, but after he had, well, his thoughts had become even more dominated by her. He wanted to know why she was pretending to be a man. He hated to think that someone as lovely as she could be caught up in whatever strangeness was gripping this town. Yet why disguise who she really was?
Was Ave even her name? Dear God, how could he have kissed a woman while not even knowing who she really was? He’d never be able to share this with Theo. Theo would think that he had lost his mind. He had certainly lost his famous reasoning. It was shameful just how the part of him he’d always thought of as intrinsic to his very being, his logic, could be wiped out by one glance from Ave. Just to see her peeking up at him from beneath her long eyelashes and he’d been lost.
Never again would he ridicule his father so much. No wonder the man lost his mind when his wife was around him. In that moment, William would have given Ave anything she asked for, even the Devereux barony if that was what she’d desired. This was why desire was so dangerous. It caused men to lose their heads.
He’d seen this so often with his parents. Their life was chaotic. They never planned. They could have spared themselves the pain of losing their children in infancy if they’d been able to restrain their desires long enough. And, although William now had sisters his parents adored, he couldn’t imagine going through the painful losses his parents had endured.
It was better not to love at all than to suffer all that anguish. The desire he felt for Ave could not be allowed to grow into anything more.
He would not do that to a woman.
That’s why his plan to marry a wealthy heiress was a pragmatic solution in more ways than one. He would not marry for love and would therefore always be in control of his emotions and he would have the means to restore the Devereux barony to its former glory.
It made sense in every way.
His attraction to Ave did not.
Yet, he did not seem to be able to stop himself from seeking her out. He could argue that it was essential to the mission to keep the one person who would talk to him on his side. But that would be a lie. He might dissemble the truth to others, but never to himself.
He wanted Ave desperately.
Even the day before, when he should have gone straight to Thomas, his feet had carried him to the training ring as soon as he’d spotted Ave watching some pages practise their lamentable riding skills.
He’d abandoned all his plans and all his reasoning and walked straight towards her. His head had urged him to turn around, but it was as if his body were being pulled by invisible rope, straight towards her.
Even when he’d spoken to her once, he could still have turned away. He could have gone about his business without her, but some insanity had prompted him to offer his help in caring for her animals. Today, he’d been the same. Instead of walking around the castle and assessing the situation by himself, he’d insisted she come with him, even when she clearly didn’t want to.
He was a fool. And now, he had made matters worse.
That kiss, which was imprinted on his soul, should never have taken place.
This whole morning had been a disaster, since the moment he had stepped into the castle grounds.
It was essential that he knew the castle inside and out. If James was too late to stop the King coming here, then Edward might well be walking into an ambush. The purpose of this morning was to check for hidden passages or secret stores of weapons, yet he had only taken in around half of what he’d seen.
He’d been too aware of Ave, hovering on the periphery of his vision, to see anything out of the ordinary in the mundane everyday detail of castle life.
Nothing, that was, until he’d heard heavy footsteps coming towards him and Ave.
Without stopping to second-guess his decision, he’d pulled Ave behind the large tapestry and waited.
The words he’d heard had confirmed his fears. The Baron and his men were planning something dark and dangerous, something that required William being kept out of the way.
The only plot that would make sense was one that was against the King.
Suspecting that, he should have followed Barwen and Thomas. If they were happy to talk about their plan in the corridor, they might have continued in their conversation. He might have learned details that would help him and his other knights later. He’d let himself, and his fellow knights, down and all because all thought of the King had been driven out of his mind. All it had taken was the simple act of Ave brushing her hand against his stomach.
Everything, his mission, his training and his mounting responsibilities, had disappeared in that instant. His only thought had been to make her belong to him in every way possible.
He leaned against the castle wall and groaned as he remembered how his body had taken over in that moment, his mouth seeking hers with unerring precision. If she hadn’t responded he would have stepped back. He would have apologised and moved on, but she’d met his passion with a force of her own. Everything had swept away and his world had become the spot where their bodies connected, her delicate curves fitting against his chest.
And how had he ended the most sublime moment of his life? Like a fool, that’s how. He’d thanked Ave for showing him around the castle and left. No apology, no explanation. It would serve him right if she hit him next time she saw him—it was no less than he deserved.
As he’d run his fingers along the len
gth of her smooth jaw, the desire to touch her soft skin all over had swamped him and he’d known then he had to stop, because if he succumbed to that hunger all would have been lost.
There were so many reasons why she could never truly belong to him and so he had no right to take it further. He banged his head back against the stone wall. He should have apologised and offered her some sort of explanation, not just walked off. He was an idiot in every sense.
The fact that he had so nearly lost control while on a mission terrified him. Thank goodness Theo was not here to see him; he would be ashamed of the way William was acting right now.
William inhaled deeply. He could swear to himself that he wouldn’t make the same mistake again, but he knew that would be a pointless endeavour. He would only fail again when he next encountered Ave. The best thing he could do right now was to concentrate on the reason he was here in the first place: the safety of the King.
Pulling himself upright, he marched back towards the entrance to the castle. He needed some answers from Thomas and Barwen and, in the mood he was in right now, he wouldn’t object to using force to get them.
The Great Hall was smoky and crowded. Thomas lounged in the ornate chair on the dais, but there was no sign of Barwen.
‘Ah, there you are.’ Thomas pushed himself into standing and came towards William, smiling widely. ‘I was expecting you earlier. Baron Caerden has sent word that he is sorry he was not here to welcome you, but he will return in a day or two. In the meantime, I am to make sure that everything is made ready for the King’s visit. We are to spare no expense.’
William frowned. ‘What?’
Thomas’s smile faltered at William’s tone, but he pressed on. ‘Baron Caerden wanted to come straight away, but he has very pressing business in the north and we thought you would understand, given your calling in life.’
‘In the north? My calling?’
‘Yes, oh, I see your confusion. I mean of course to the north of here, not to the north of England. Caernarfon, I think I told you, requires the Baron’s help and he is the most attentive of neighbours, anything to help a fellow baron. As I said, Caerden has given me leave to make any arrangements with you on his behalf. And by calling, I meant the fact that you are a chivalrous knight, bound to protect the peace.’ Thomas laughed, a high-pitched noise, which grated on William’s skin.
If William hadn’t overheard Thomas and Barwen’s conversation only a short while ago, he might have believed this show of hospitality—it was a great honour to receive a visit from the King. Now that William knew what he did, he was hard-pressed to see how this civility was going to ensure that they kept William away from the castle. Unless Thomas’s plan was to agree to everything William suggested, in order to get him to leave quickly.
‘Perhaps I could see where the King will stay during his visit,’ he said.
‘Of course,’ said Thomas, his full smile firmly back in place. ‘The rooms will need some further preparation but I think you will find their size adequate for a royal visit.’
William nodded. He followed Thomas out of the Great Hall, the man’s new civility making him loquacious, William tried to concentrate as Thomas rambled on, but it was difficult to listen to the man’s surprisingly shrill voice. It would appear that William was going to get a full history of the castle today, along with a description of where each wall hanging had come from and their cost. William kept silent, hoping to give Thomas room to slip up, but the man continued with his boring monologue.
‘And this is the chamber I have marked out for His Majesty.’
The room was indeed sizeable, running as it did above the length of the Great Hall. William strode to the centre of the chamber and turned slowly around in a circle, taking in all the features. An ornate fireplace sat in the centre of the outside wall, but aside from the size and the possible warmth the fire might throw out, it was not a suitable place for the King to spend even a moment of his time, let alone a prolonged visit.
‘Some work will need to be done in here in order to get it ready for His Majesty,’ William said, not even hiding the disdain in his voice.
‘Of course. I will set Caerden’s finest men on it today. The chamber will be ready in no time.’
William sincerely doubted that.
Thomas continued to rattle on about the room while William walked the length of it. He prodded a rug and a waft of damp hit him. This room would not be ready in time for the King’s visit—it would not be ready in a year. William very much doubted Caerden had any intention of doing up this room, but time would tell. William would need to return here without Thomas and to explore every stone. In the unlikely event that Edward made it into this room, William would need to be confident that there was a quick way out and where any potential traps could be hidden.
He made his way over to the long window at the end of the room. It was a substantial piece of glass and must have cost the Baron quite a sum. ‘What is this room normally used for?’
‘It was the late Baron’s room, but since his father’s passing the current Baron Caerden has preferred his old chambers.’
William would have to investigate why. Caerden’s chambers would have to be something special to not use the potential of this room. It was strange to let a large space like this go to waste.
William rubbed a pane of glass and looked out at the view. Below him, the courtyard bustled with life—without anyone in authority to watch over them the inhabitants were smiling and the whole picture was more relaxed than he’d seen it before.
William’s body tightened as he spied Ave stepping out of the stables and his gaze instantly locked on her. Behind him, Thomas continued spouting nonsense, but William lost all concentration as he watched Ave scurry across the courtyard towards the carpenter’s workshop. The carpenter looked up at her approach and smiled. William’s fists clenched as Ave reached out and ran her fingers over some of the woodwork, the carpenter nodding, clearly pleased at whatever she was saying to him. Did the carpenter know that Ave was a woman? From the way they were speaking, they were obviously friends.
William forced himself to uncurl his hands and step away from the window. Jealousy was not an emotion he was entitled to have.
* * *
The afternoon dragged on. Thomas seemed intent on showing him every item of furniture the chamber had to offer, not seeming to mind when William pointed out that none of it was fit for the King.
‘We will make sure it’s all buffed and polished before he steps through our gatehouse, don’t you worry.’
Twice, William tried to leave and both times Thomas found a seemingly spurious reason for him to stay. There was some tapestry William just had to see. William kept a hand close to his sword’s hilt, half expecting a trap around a corner, but nothing out of the ordinary happened.
By the time William extricated himself from Thomas’s cloying presence he had to roll his shoulders to loosen the muscles, which had tightened in his neck over the course of the afternoon.
He inhaled deeply as he stepped into the courtyard. There was a cooler breeze this evening, as if winter had not relinquished its hold on spring quite yet. A few guards were milling by the gate, more than when he’d arrived two days ago but still nothing like the provision needed to defend a place such as this. They barely looked up from their game of dice as he walked past and out of the castle grounds.
He wondered if James had reached Theo yet, but he sincerely doubted it. He scratched his chin. The stubble was beginning to itch now and he could do with a close shave. Heat spread across his face when he realised his desire for a close shave was pure vanity. He’d survived a month or so without one before. He’d been told he looked better without a beard and he wanted to look good for Ave. He was absurd.
He shook his head to clear his mind. Perhaps he shouldn’t wait for James’s return message. He could just leave.
He ignored the str
ange pang in his chest that materialised at the thought of leaving Ave. He’d only known her for a few days, but already he knew it would hurt to be away from her, knowing he might never see her again. It was for the best, she unsettled him, bringing out a reckless side he’d kept buried so deep within him he hadn’t even known it existed. That side of him was buried for a reason and he had no desire to bring that aspect of his personality to the fore. Getting away from Ave would bring him back to himself and he needed that.
No, he had done all he could here. He would leave on the morrow and return only with the support of the rest of the King’s Knights. Together they could investigate just quite what was wrong with this castle and its strange inhabitants and quell any potential uprising before it got started.
He rounded a bend and came to a stop. Slightly up ahead of him on the dusty track, he could see Ave walking, her head bowed as if she was walking into a strong wind. He grimaced. His actions behind the arras were probably responsible for the look of defeat.
Part of him argued that he should catch up with her and apologise. He’d treated her badly, when she’d only ever been courteous to him. The other part of him screamed that speaking to her for any reason was a really bad idea.
His body appeared to make the decision for him. Without conscious thought he realised he was walking faster, almost running, in a bid to get to her quickly.
‘Ave,’ he called out when he was only a few footsteps away.
Her shoulders tensed at the sound of his voice and he cursed. He’d made her wary of him and that was the last thing he’d wanted to do. Aside from his ridiculous desire for her, she was his only ally in this strange town.
‘Ave, please wait for me.’
She slowed and stopped then, but didn’t turn to face him.
‘I’m sorry about earlier,’ he said, as he drew alongside her. ‘I shouldn’t have...done what I did.’
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