by Emily Rose
Like two wild animals, we moved in desperation to get what few clothes we had on off, throwing them haphazardly to the floor. Before I had a chance to even think about what was about to happen, I was completely naked underneath him.
And that was when I felt it.
The panic, the fear I always had when it came to sex. My heart stalled in my chest and my chest lifted in quick breaths as my hand came up to press against his bare chest.
Miles froze above me and stared deep into my eyes. “Are you okay?”
I shook my head quickly. “No, I’m scared.”
His gaze softened, “We don’t have to do this.”
“No, I want to. I’m just scared since I’ve never done this before,” I said weakly.
Miles tilted his head to the side. “I’ll be gentle and if you want me to stop, just tell me. I’m not going to force you into doing anything you don’t want to,” he said.
My heart wanted to scream at him to do it, but my mind wanted to fight it. I took a deep breath and then nodded as if to give him permission. Miles waited a moment and then reached over to the nightstand to grab a condom.
Adjusting himself between my legs, he put it on and then lifted his dark gaze to mine before he eased himself forward. My body tensed when I felt his dick barely enter me and I squeezed my eyes shut, biting down on my lip at the sharp sting of pain. Miles stopped and then spoke in a voice that told me he was struggling to hold back.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
I nodded and then opened my eyes, releasing a long breath. As if that was his cue, he started pushing himself gently inside me again. The pain shot through me, causing my heart to race inside my chest until finally, it faded into a dark pleasure.
And all I felt was him.
My eyes drifted shut on their own and my head tilted back into the pillow as Miles started thrusting into me a little harder each time. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I grabbed his shoulders and moaned with his heavy breathing in my ear.
“Lesley, you feel fucking amazing,” he said breathlessly.
The thought of me giving Miles pleasure ignited a darkness in me that I didn’t know existed until that moment. It took over my soul and caused my heart to skip a beat as he continued to thrust into me like I was the perfect release for him.
“Miles,” I whispered with a desperate moan.
He spoke next to my ear again without ever stopping. “What?”
“I… “ My breasts brushed against his chest each time he moved and I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth before I released it to speak, “I love you, Miles,” I said with my heart in my throat.
Miles groaned in my ear and then suddenly flipped us around, so that I was on top of him and like I had done this a million times before, I braced my hands on his hard stomach and rode him, loving the way my clit rubbed against his skin each time my hips moved. My eyes opened and I looked down at him without stopping.
The look in his eyes told me that I didn’t need to stop or slow down. So I didn’t. I kept moving until the pressure was almost too strong to handle. Miles gripped my hips with his hands and kept me from pulling away from him as my body shattered into a million pieces above him.
My head fell back, and my nails dug into his skin as I cried out, but he didn’t stop. Instead, he spun us once again and used one of his hands to lock my arms above my head, still thrusting into me even as my body rocked through the first round. My eyes locked with his and I could see the emotion burning deep within his gaze.
“Miles,” I whispered as my body jerked forward with each thrust.
He didn’t say anything, but instead, shifted his body in a way that made his dick hit that spot deep inside me. I cried out as the pressure started building once again. I couldn’t take it anymore. With my heart pounding and my body shivering uncontrollably, I felt that release. That moment when you hit the top of a rollercoaster and then suddenly drop back to the ground, screaming your lungs out.
That was what I felt.
And then I heard him.
Miles groaned above me and released my wrists only long enough to grab my hip, holding me tightly against him as he came. I watched the way his eyes closed and the way he dropped his head as if he couldn’t hold it up anymore.
And I loved every single moment of it. So much that I reached down with my hands and grabbed his hips, digging my nails into him. Finally, he collapsed on top of me, using his forearms to keep himself from crushing me. His breathing was heavy, and I could feel his heart as it pounded against my own.
For the longest time, we didn’t say anything and then he spoke from where his head rested on my breasts. “Are you okay?”
I laughed once, which caused him to lift his head enough to meet my eyes and I could see the confused look on his face.
“Wow, was it that bad?” He asked.
My face heated and I shook my head. “No, no. I mean I’m fine. A bit sore, but fine.”
Miles smirked and then moved his hips just enough to remind me that he was still very much inside me.
I squirmed and sucked in a sharp breath. “Miles!”
Chuckling, he slowly slid out of me and then stood up, putting his boxers back on before he vanished to the bathroom across the room. Once he was gone, I cleaned myself up and then grabbed one of his shirts to put on before I laid back on the bed to stare up at the ceiling fan.
Oh God.
I had sex with Miles. I had sex with my stepbrother and in the moment, I had let my emotions get the best of me and told him how I really felt.
My hands slapped against my face to cover my eyes and I bounced around in the bed with this strange, awkward feeling that had settled over me.
“What are you doing?” I heard his voice.
Refusing to look at him though, I spoke from behind my hands, making my voice sound muffled. “Nothing, just feeling incredibly awkward right about now,” I said.
Miles didn’t say anything and then I felt his weight on the bed. I knew he was above me, but I couldn’t bring myself to remove my hands yet.
“Lesley,” he said and then lifted one hand off the bed to grab one of mine, gently pulling it away from my face until I could see him with one eye. “Don’t feel awkward,” he said in a soothing tone.
“Miles, I—"
He lifted his finger to my lips again to stop me and then spoke, “Shh. You have nothing to feel awkward about,” he said.
Dropping my other hand back to the bed, I stared up at him and suddenly everything became serious. “Thank you.”
He shook his head. “I wanted you just as much. It wasn’t like this was one sided. It’s never been one sided,” he said.
I nodded and then pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, unable to say what I really wanted to say, but it seemed, I didn’t have to because he spoke again.
“But I do have a question,” he said.
My heart flipped. “And what’s that?”
Miles watched me for a long minute and then responded. “I’m a bit confused about something honestly,” he said.
I took a deep breath, wishing he would just say whatever was on his mind already and answered. “About?”
“Were you telling me you loved me as your brother or—" he said with a slight grin pulling at his lips.
My face heated and I smacked him hard in the arm. “Miles!! That’s gross!!”
He laughed and then rolled to lay on the bed beside me. “Well, I’m just a bit confused about it,” he said.
God, he was never going to let me live this down.
“Ok, I’m leaving,” I said and started to get up, but he stopped me by grabbing my arm and pulling me down until I was half-way on top of him, staring right in his eyes.
“Lesley, don’t leave,” he said.
Blinking, I saw how much he didn’t want me to leave and it wasn’t like I wanted to leave anyway, so I nodded and then snuggled up to his side, resting my cheek on his chest. We stayed that way for the longest time until finally he b
roke it.
“I can’t promise you anything. I can’t tell you how I feel, because it seems to always backfire on me when I do and I can’t lose you,” he said into the dimly lit room.
I stared at the wall and thought about his words. It was clear that love was a hard thing for Miles to accept, but I was okay with that. I could accept never hearing those words come from him as long as I still had him.
That was all that mattered to me.
“I’m not going anywhere,” I said.
Miles released a breath like he had been holding it until I responded and then tightened his grip on me, but that was when I knew.
He couldn’t say those words, but he didn’t have to. I felt them with each grin I put on his face, with every laugh, with every moment of happiness.
Marcus Cross never once loved. He took his last name and used it for evil. He would have continued giving the name a bad reputation, but then his brother had a son and he destroyed Marcus’ legacy. He burned his world to ashes and now carried the name with the power of his heart.
Because Miles Cross did love.
He loved me.