Which sucked because she was attracted to the obstinate male. More than attracted.
Each time she saw or heard or scented him, her clit throbbed and her pussy flooded with her arousal. Since Tarn, she’d experienced a recurring, sharp pain on her lower right side, above her ovary. Of course, since Huw had made it his goal to avoid her as much as possible over the past two days, the physical reactions were bearable. It was her heart and head that hurt the most.
Sitting next to Huw, his scent overwhelmed her. She rubbed her lower abdomen where the phantom ache viciously stabbed at her womb. Though she was one hundred percent Terran on both sides of the family, she realized she was bonding with him in some manner. What that manner was? Was anybody’s guess.
After the incident on Tarn, Kerr, and Lia had taken blood and tissue samples from both her and Huw on Wulf’s orders. Since the blood draw, Huw had become even more scarce than usual. The fact he was sitting next to her at all was after a sneaky move by Iolyn. After one short “hello,” he’d studiously ignored her.
Jerk.
And dumb her, her heart ached for him even more. Whatever in the hell was going on in her body, she wished it would stop. If the strained relations continued, it could affect their working relationship. If that happened, she’d have to transfer away from Mel’s crew, because she refused to endanger her crew members. Nowicki would take her back on the Leonidas in a flash. Aeron could go back to the Galanti.
While Nadia wasn’t afraid of learning the truth about what was happening between them, Huw was.
If the results of the testing on their blood and tissue samples were positive for some sort of Prime-like mating and Huw denied the biological evidence, it would crush her, especially in light of their psychic connection and physical attraction.
A gal could only take so much rejection from the man she desired and, yes, had begun to love despite his stubbornness. Huw was exactly the kind of man she’d always been attracted to—big, strong, intelligent—and the sexual attraction between them was off the charts. When he wasn’t ignoring her or denying the tie between them, he was fun to be with. They shared a lot of the same interests. Over the weeks she’d known him, he’d shown himself to be honorable, courteous, and very caring and protective of her well-being. His actions on Tarn had underlined some of those more admirable traits. She could envision them being partners in every aspect of their lives.
From the corner of her eye, she noted Huw’s handsome face was flushed from the heat of arguing with the other Prime males at the table, all of whom were actively looking for a companion among the Terran and Volusian females in Gold. It was a good thing Mel and Wulf had responded so quickly to her suggestion about addressing dating and sexual etiquette before someone’s feelings were hurt or a woman was approached sexually in an inappropriate manner. No one wanted the first foray into uniting the two fleets to be sabotaged by cultural misunderstandings over male-female relations.
Prime males tended to be autocratic and one hundred percent alpha. Terran, Volusian, and other hominid females in the Alliance military were strong-willed and used to kicking such high-handed approaches in the teeth. The potential for cultural misunderstanding—and bloodshed—would’ve been high.
Huw’s low rumbling tones cut through her chaotic thoughts. “I still seek a gemat-gemate bonding.”
Nadia mentally swore and bit her lip to keep from vocalizing angry words. Damn his hide! But he’d accept sex from a woman who wasn’t his gemate. His visit to the sex surrogate Susa had proven that.
After hearing about Huw’s visit to the sex surrogate, Nadia had toyed with the idea of going to another man in order to salvage her pride, but she wouldn’t be able to endure his touch. And she wouldn’t hurt another man’s feelings or pride by rejecting him in an intimate moment.
A shard of pain sliced through her gut. Nadia gasped and quickly took a sip of her wine to keep from crying out like a wounded animal. She understood Huw’s current words were a knee-jerk reaction to the other men’s more logical arguments. But his lack of concern for her—and Lia’s—feelings was inconsiderate to the point of being callous.
His every word denying that a non-Prime female was a viable substitute as a life partner for a Prime male was like a knife to the heart.
Huw had made up his mind. Their dining companions were wasting their breath, attempting to convince him otherwise. If the existence of their unique psychic bond hadn’t convinced him, why would mere words? It would take a major shift in his life view to allow him to date or court a non-Prime female.
Despite the pain he’d caused and continued to cause in the deepest levels of her being, she had the urge to soothe him, calm his anger.
She needed her fucking head examined.
“Brother, you are nuts.” Iolyn shook his head and shot Huw a look filled with disgust. “Wulf finding Mel was a one in, well, a whole hell of a lot of chances. Face the facts. There are no unmarked Prime females of mating age left in the Cejuru system or even the galaxy—and fewer females are born each year and those tend to be mostly infertile.”
Iolyn rubbed at his chest where Nadia knew he had a quiescent gemat marking; his mate was one of the Lost Ones. Hope was minuscule that the lost women or their grown daughters would ever be found—or, at least, found alive.
“I don’t want to spend my life alone,” Iolyn continued. “If I can have children with a Terran or another compatible female … well, I want that.”
“But we still have a chance to find others like Mel.” Huw’s sculpted cheekbones were highlighted red with his righteous anger.
Is that what he really thought? He was gambling that he might find the one perfect Prime woman during their upcoming mission? Nadia shook her head. Iolyn was correct— Huw was nuts. The odds were so small they were negligible.
Huw smacked the table with the flat of his hand, making the tableware jump. “It is possible some of the women and the female children survived and were assimilated into local populations just as Mel was. We could still find your gemate, brother.”
Iolyn shook his head, sadness in his eyes, but said nothing. Huw wasn’t in a receptive frame of mind and his brother was in a better position to know that than most.
Just her luck, Nadia was attracted to the wrong brother, the one who had pipe dreams and believed in fairy tales.
“It’s also possible they all died.” Royce Nowicki took a sip of his Valerian whiskey.
“The destinations are located in some of the most isolated and dangerous sectors of the galaxy between the Perseus and Cygnus-Orion spiral arms. The fact the planets had at one time held Prime fortifications doesn’t mean the planets were habitable at the time of the Lost Ones evacuation.”
He gestured with his glass. “Hell, the ships probably didn’t make it to their final destinations. Keep in mind, they were being actively pursued by the Antareans and taking on laser fire and torpedoes. Face it, Huw. Iolyn and the others are correct—find a lovely woman, court her, marry or mate or whatever you want to call it, and get a chance to have a family. It’s a no-brainer to me.”
Huw scowled into his whiskey. “The others can do what they want. There’s still a chance some might live—and they are waiting for their gemats to find them. It should be a matter of honor and conscience that a Prime male eliminate that possibility before seeking a life partner among non-Prime women.”
Nadia’s heart stuttered. The fervor in his voice demonstrated Huw would never be happy with second-best—and she would always be second-best. The anguish was all consuming. She barely managed to stifle the cry erupting from her very soul. She inhaled sharply and grabbed at the knifelike pain in her lower abdomen.
“Nadia?” From her left, Lia leaned around Joen, her voice low. “You okay?”
Thank God, only Lia and Joen had noticed Nadia’s pain. In the background, the others continued to dissect why Huw was crazy and why mating with non-Prime females would be good for the Prime people as a whole.
Nadia turned toward L
ia and Joen. She wouldn’t be surprised if her pain was etched on her face. “I … I ache, Lia.”
Joen murmured something low; it sounded like “stupid Huw.” He patted Nadia’s shoulder. Sending the concerned Prime a tortured smile, she shrugged away from his uncomfortable touch. His nostrils flared and he glared past her at Huw whose back was to them. “Very stupid Huw,” muttered the communications officer.
Dermo. She needed to regain her composure; this was so unlike her to lose command of her emotions in front of peers. The calm, cool science officer of the Galanti, the “Iceberg,” never showed emotion. She’d learned a long time ago to hide the tender, feminine part of herself in order to survive in the male-dominated Alliance fleet. She could almost hate Huw for what his careless words had done to her self-control.
Lia frowned. “Do you want to leave?”
Lia had doctored Nadia’s wounds for many years as they’d served together in the Alliance and would know she was normally a stoic about pain.
Nadia nodded, afraid to speak for fear she’d start weeping convulsively. The emotional roller coaster she’d ridden since her feelings for Huw had first appeared were as devastating as the physical side effects.
Lia’s full lips thinned, and then she turned to the others at the table. The men had gone silent at Lia’s question. Huw’s narrowed amber gaze was fixed on Nadia; he radiated concern. Too little, too late. She needed to leave.
“Nadia’s ill,” Lia said in her best I’m-a-doctor-don’t-mess-with-me voice. “We’ll head back to crew’s quarters.”
Rising from her seat, Nadia looked away from Huw’s piercing stare. The other men stood; some voiced their concerns since she’d been injured during the Tarn attack and had sustained some bruises during fight training earlier that day.
Huw opened his mouth and immediately shut it. Instead of speaking, he took a sip of his drink. His gaze was now anywhere but on her.
The public sign of rejection even as he nudged her shields gently sent a chill down her spine. The courteous, caring Huw versus the uncaring, single-minded, I-want-a-gemate Huw were going to drive her over the edge of sanity. God, she might really have to switch ships. She couldn’t work, live, like this.
Nadia trembled, cold to her core. Dizziness struck as she forgot to breathe. She staggered slightly and braced herself on the table to keep from losing her balance.
The much smaller Lia took hold of her arm, steadying her. “Nadia? Do we need to get ground transportation?”
“Move, Lia. I’ve got her.” Joen had his arm around Nadia’s waist and supported her easily until she regained control. She moved away from him and he released her immediately.
Did he suspect his touch felt wrong? Probably. Joen, she’d noticed, was very observant.
“No … no ground transportation! Lia, I’m fine. I can walk. The fresh air will help.”
She stiffened her spine and stood tall, willing her knees not to give out at least until she and Lia were out of sight. “Let’s get out of here. Please?”
“I will accompany you, ladies.” Joen tucked Lia’s arm in his and left it up to Nadia as to whether she would take the other arm he offered. “No female Alliance soldier is to be out alone on the planet.”
Ignoring the icky feeling touching his arm sent through her, she placed her fingers on his forearm. She refused to show a hint of discomfort in front of Huw. She’d keep her pride if nothing else.
“Nadia?” Lia whispered. “Do you want one of the others to come also? Mel and Wulf want every woman to have a male escort.”
“It’s okay, Lia. I think one Prime male for the two of us should suffice.” Nadia attempted to smile at the darkly handsome Joen who towered over both women.
“I am a very lucky man to be allowed to accompany two such beautiful women.”
Joen winked at Nadia before leading them away from the table toward the exit.
As they moved farther and farther away from Huw, the formerly piercing ache in her womb lessened to a phantom ache such as when a person had lost a vital limb. If she looked back, she knew she’d find Huw glaring at them. He might not want her as she wanted him, but he noticeably fumed whenever she spoke to or interacted with a male crew member. The man had feelings for her; he was just too stubborn to give up his dream and admit it.
God, what am I going to do? She stumbled and only Joen’s strong arm kept her from falling.
“I could carry you, Nadia.” Joen’s sincere offer brought tears to her eyes. “You are very pale. You are shaking.”
“That’s not necessary … I’m … just … um, sore from the hand-to-hand training earlier today … and tired and…” She’d let him fill in the rest of it however he wished.
“Don’t believe her, Joen. Nadia’s normally as strong as a Volusian ox-steer. She bounced back from the injuries she incurred on Tarn with barely a standard hour in the regen bed. Huw’s bullshit hurt her. He made me so mad I wanted to spit.”
Lia was very empathic, had always been so. It was part of what made her an excellent doctor. Nadia suspected the woman had the same psychic abilities as Mel—and as Nadia herself.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” Nadia prayed both of them would take the hint.
Dissecting Huw’s feelings and actions would make it harder for her to sublimate the pain.
Joen released their arms long enough to open the bar’s heavy exterior door and allow her and Lia to pass through the exit before him. Once outside, he offered his arm to Lia with a sympathetic smile to Nadia.
Yeah, he knew his touch bothered her.
Joen was perfect for Lia. He was intelligent, even-tempered for a Prime, and a complete gentleman. The couple’s emotional auras meshed even more now than a couple of days ago.
And, no, Nadia wasn’t green-eyed with jealousy at her good friend’s luck; she merely desired the same luck.
*
Huw kept an eye on the trio as they left the bar. He fought the urge to run after them and escort Nadia to her quarters himself, to make sure she had no lingering injury from Cas Jod’s barreling into her earlier that day.
It was getting harder and harder to avoid showing his feelings for Nadia in public.
But the mission loomed, and his words to the others about honor and conscience were what he had promised himself to abide by until it was proven one way or another whether any Lost Ones survived.
The others didn’t understand his position; but then had they really thought it through? He had—and he could not openly court Nadia until he was sure he wouldn’t hurt either an undiscovered gemate or Nadia.
After the door closed on the three, Iolyn hit him on the arm—hard. “You, my brother, are a fool!”
Rubbing the place his brother had punched, he turned and glared. “What was that for? What did I do?”
Royce snorted and leaned back in his chair, cradling his drink. His light blue eyes glittered angrily. “You insulted all women other than Prime ones, asswipe. And, if you hadn’t noticed, we had two non-Prime women sitting at the table. Mel would’ve wiped the floor with your face if she’d heard the crap you were shoveling.”
Huw frowned. “I told the truth.”
Iolyn muttered under his breath.
Huw winced at his brother’s furious, vulgar words.
“Joen likes Lia, you imbecile.” Iolyn punched him on the arm again. “If you hadn’t noticed, he’s been courting the little Terran doctor for weeks. How do you think Lia felt hearing she wasn’t good enough to mate with a Prime male?”
“That’s not what I said or meant. Joen and Lia?” Huw opened his mouth and then shut it. “I didn’t realize. I will, of course, apologize if that is how my words sounded.”
“They sounded all right. Better apologize to Nadia while you’re at it,” Ard interjected, “on your knees.”
“Why on my knees?” He didn’t like Ard speaking so familiarly of Nadia. The science officer had displayed far too much interest in her.
“Because Nadia likes you, dick w
ad,” Royce said.
At Huw’s huff of disbelief, the captain of the Leonidas added, “A lot. She likes you a whole hell of a lot.” Royce sighed. “Listen up, dumb ass. I’ve known and served with Nadia for over five standard years. I’ve never seen the Iceberg so emotional over a man in all that time—and that includes the anger she felt toward the guy who attempted to rape her.”
At the mention of rape and Nadia in the same sentence, a chill swept down Huw’s back. It was as if Royce’s words conjured up an ill wind, a portent of things to come, rather than a memory from the past. Huw shook it off and rubbed the ache over his heart.
He wasn’t precognitive. In fact, other than the usual empathy Prime warriors displayed for strong emotions during battle, he’d never been particularly psychically sensitive at all.
Well, that is, not until the Tarn incident when Nadia had somehow projected her thoughts to him and vice-versa. But he could explain the unusual occurrence as her being telepathic and him being a sensitive receiver.
“Mel shared some information about the incident in Nadia’s past.” Iolyn broke the long and uncomfortable silence Royce’s words had spawned. “Prime males do not rape or abuse women.”
Choking on his drink, Royce coughed. “Um, what about those fanatics who took Mel and Nadia? The women were beaten, bruised … naked from what I read in the report. Are you telling me those filthy bastards hadn’t planned on sexually assaulting them? Hell, Wulf’s swearing fucking blistered the paint on the conference room wall when Mel made her oral report to the Admiral about the incident.”
Royce gestured wildly, some of his drink sloshing over the edge of the glass. “And what about Tarn? The Prime who’d hired those mercs had given them carte blanche to torture our crew members—especially the women. You don’t think the rebel leader didn’t know the mercs he hired had been slavers in the past and would’ve raped our female crew members before they sold them to the Antareans?”
Rage burned anew within Huw at what could have happened to Nadia if she’d been captured on Tarn. He’d seen the room in the military facility the mercenary force had prepared for torture. While it had been intended for all the Gold Squad members, the women would have been particularly vulnerable to some of the devices they’d found. He and the other rescuers had taken great pleasure in smashing the torture devices to bits.
Prime Selection Page 13