Then Drake led me to a sitting room. James was sprawled on a divan, two female humans on either side of him. One had bite marks above her collarbone that trickled blood he hadn’t bothered to clean up. That was considered extremely fucking disrespectful, but I wasn’t about to call him on it.
His face brightened when he saw me. “Lisbeth! Come. Have a drink with me. I saved you one.” He pushed at the other female’s side until she stood up and came halfway to me. He’d ordered to me to drink, but it hadn’t been entirely direct. I still felt the compulsion behind it as I walked up to the female without hesitation. She was taller than me so I lifted her arm and sunk my fangs into her arm, making sure to miss the artery that ran to her elbow. I didn’t want her to bleed out. Her blood tasted bitter, and I knew I’d get a stomach ache from it. I drank as much as I needed before pulling away, making sure to lick her skin around my bite to clean off the residual blood. I had to resist the urge to gag over the foul taste of her. I was sure she wouldn’t appreciate being told she tasted bad.
James was watching me with a steady gaze, one of his hands gently stroking the hair of the female he’d fed from. “Are you satisfied?” I nodded. “Good. Ladies, shoo.” He waved his hand at them and they left together. “Have you eaten?” I nodded again. “Not feeling chatty this morning? Never mind. I can talk for the both of us.”
Oh fuck me.
He got up, smoothly, and walked over to me. One hand reached up to swipe my hair off my shoulder and he leaned in to place a gentle kiss on his bite mark.
“I hated doing that,” he said mournfully, and I wanted to recoil from his fingers traipsing over my skin. “If you’d been weaker, I wouldn’t have needed to. But you’re old.” He kissed higher on my neck. “I’m glad to see you don’t protest to being called old. Most of the younger vampires don’t understand. It’s not an insult to us. To humans, it means you’re closer to death. To us, it means you’ve been alive longer.” His lips went to my ear and I almost let out a noise of displeasure. “Have you ever wondered why there are so few older Born?”
“Sometimes.”
He stepped away from me and picked up a drink from the coffee table, then he swirled the amber liquid in the glass. “I’ve often thought about it. No one really knows for sure why. There are so many rumors surrounding the topic that one can hardly discern any actual facts. Since you’re barely younger than me, I’d be interested to know your thoughts on the matter.” He waited for me to speak, staring me down while he took a long sip from his glass.
I couldn’t lie, I’d often wondered about this topic. Why me, a 400-year-old vampire, was considered one of the oldest when vampires had been around for many millennia. But I didn’t exactly feel like having a heart to heart with James.
I gave him a simple answer. “There are certain topics my Order prefers not to discuss. That’s one of them.”
“Oh, fuck that. I asked what you think, not what your Order thinks. That’s why I stay away from the Orders. They’re all rules and regulations. Not at all to my taste. Stuffy pricks.” Stuffy. That did explain why he was here, ruling over his own little world, and why I’d never heard of him.
“I’m sure they wouldn’t approve of your feeding schedule,” I said before I could stop myself.
He studied me and then smiled slowly as if he’d figured me out. “You were a rule enforcer, weren’t you?” I said nothing. “A rule enforcer on the run for breaking the rules. How’s that irony for you? Stop being so uptight. I despise uptight people.”
Did he seriously bring me here just to talk about how uptight I am? And he’d just ordered me to stop being uptight too. Might as well order me to stop being sarcastic.
I cleared my throat casually, trying to hold in the pain I felt as his order seeped in. “So. Did you need anything else?”
“Hmm, dinner tonight. Leave.” And with that, he dismissed me. And I gladly left.
Sixteen
James sent over another dress for me to wear when the limo arrived and this one was a deep purple cocktail dress with a low back. I put it on and left in the limo.
‘Dinner with James’ was apparently also ‘Party with James.’ His colonial mansion was littered with the rich and fabulous from this tiny town. Mostly Born, some humans. I exited the limo and went to the front door. Drake was there to wave me in, ignoring me as much as possible. Whatever he was, he did not like me, a fact I was fine with.
Inside the mansion, it took me a few minutes to find James. He was in the thick of it, in the parlor I’d been in that morning, surrounded by humans and Born, dominating all the attention with whatever he was telling them. He spotted me and brightened, then he walked to me, motioning me closer.
“Lisbeth, how good to see you,” he said, leaning in to kiss my lips. Unable to help it, I recoiled at the unwanted contact, but he held me firmly. “Don’t recoil from me,” he whispered in my ear. My body crunched inward at his order like he’d squeezed my ribcage, and I tried not to lean against him as I swayed with pain. He stepped away, put a hand on my bare back in an unwanted caress, and pushed me towards his friends. “Gentlemen, meet Lisbeth. My latest conquest.”
His conquest. That put a lot of things into perspective.
“We have been so excited to meet you,” one of them said, a human female decked to the teeth in pearls.
“A vampire almost as old as our master, you are a precious gem,” another said, this one a male vampire wearing a very expensive suit. James tightened his hold around me as if he was jealous of anyone saying how awesome I was. My hip bone felt slightly crushed under his hand. I knew I’d have a bruise there later.
“James,” someone purred in a heavy accent. A female vampire came up to us and offered James her hand, which he gently kissed. She glanced at me, gave me a once-over, and smiled at me in a way that meant she wanted to rip my hair out. “So, you’re her. The vampire that was so strong that James had to bite her.” She clearly ranked being bitten by James with winning the lottery. And I was almost positive her accent was fake. “He’s never had to bite one of us before. Carrying his mark means being under his absolute control. Having to obey his every whim. If only one of us could be so lucky,” she said, with a cute little seductive laugh at the end.
I wisely held my tongue, even though she was waiting for me to say something. I didn’t think James would appreciate me telling his guest to go fuck herself.
“Don’t be so jealous, Miranda,” James said playfully. “I can still control you.”
She gave him a look that wasn’t very appropriate for a room full of people. “Yes, but I can say no. She cannot.” She looked back over at me. “Your lady looks like she doesn’t want to be here. Maybe she should go home and leave you with us.” Oh, yes, please.
James laughed. “Don’t be ridiculous, Miranda. Why don’t you go get another drink?” She left in an unsatisfied huff. James leaned into me and said harshly, “Cheer up. Stop looking like you don’t want to be here.” I instantly smiled and looked like I was having the time of my life.
And that’s how it went for hours.
Order after order. Don’t leave my side. Kiss me like you mean it. Stop fidgeting. Dance with me. Don’t dance with anyone else. Only look happy when you’re with me. Stop looking unhappy. Try the veal.
He spouted out orders so often, he didn’t know which he’d already said to me, or which contradicted each other. I had a feeling he didn’t even realize he was causing me pain. With every order, my body hurt more and more. I didn’t have to think about obeying, I naturally did that, but my body was suffering being under his control. It fought underneath at the sheer wrongness of it all, and I was racked with pain in every part of my body.
When James finally said I could leave, after everyone else had gone, the only thing keeping me up was his order to stop looking like I was about to fall over. He put me inside one of his limos, giving me a slow kiss on the lips, and sent me on my way.
The further I got from him, the more pain I felt. Wave after wave of agony. Ev
ery sound was too loud; every light was too bright. If I had to deal with this for the rest of my life, I would go insane.
Drake sat there the entire time, either not noticing how much I was hurting, or not caring.
When the limo pulled up to Sara’s hotel, Drake helped me out, and I stood on unsteady limbs that barely supported my weight. I walked slowly to the front door and put my hand on the handle. It opened before I could try to pull on it.
Sara stood in the doorway, her face the most serious I’d seen in our short friendship. I stumbled over the threshold and didn’t put a hand up fast enough to stop myself from bonking my nose on the doorway.
“That vile man,” Sara whispered. Even her soft voice pounded in my head and I whimpered, putting a hand to my head to shield my eyes from the lights. I noticed Knight coming into the lobby from the kitchen, but I couldn’t bear to look at him. I felt so much shame. And pain. Lots of pain. The light bothering me was suddenly gone and a hand reached out to stroke my hair.
Without a word, Knight took my hand and led me up to my room. He walked over to shut the curtains to block out the moonlight before coming back to stand in front of me. The darkness didn’t bother our superior eyesight. I could still see him as well as if the light was on.
Someone knocked so lightly on the door I almost didn’t hear it. Sara peeped her head in and placed a bottle on the floor before closing the door again. Knight bent to pick it up and studied the label. He showed it to me. Sky Vodka.
Vampires can’t really get drunk. But we could get a nice buzz with a good percentage in our system. I grabbed the bottle and swigged half of it before Knight grabbed it back to swig the rest.
I wiped my mouth and looked up at him. “I don’t want to talk about it,” I said quietly. My own voice made my temple throb.
Knight didn’t respond. He set the empty bottle down on the floor and approached me slowly, judging my response to his proximity. When he was so close I could feel his breath on my hair, I put my arms around him and I cried harder than I’d ever cried before.
Seventeen
My head was still throbbing when I woke up, but everything else felt better. I sat up and crawled to the edge of the bed. Knight was lying on the floor, one arm behind his head, the other holding his phone that he was playing a game on. He looked up at me and put his phone away.
“Morning,” he said quietly. Beautiful. He was so beautiful.
I wanted to slide off the bed and just fall onto the floor next to him, probably cry again, but I didn’t. Instead, I just felt more shame.
“I’m sorry,” I said, staring at the floor. “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable last night.”
“That’s what the vodka was for,” he joked. “I was more worried about you.” I didn’t respond, so he added, “You smelled like tacos.” Tacos? How could I have smelled like tacos?
“There weren’t tacos at the party.”
“Okay, maybe I was the one that smelled like tacos. Either way, I really want tacos now.” He put two fingers to his temple and pretended to concentrate.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m sending Sara a psychic vibe so she’ll make me tacos.” He narrowed his eyes and grunted with effort. “Damn,” he said as he relaxed. “It was worth a try.” He saw me looking at him so he met my eyes. “Don’t worry about me, Lis. I’m here for you when you need me. That’s what friends are for.”
Was he my friend? I hated to put a label on what we were. Calling him my friend wasn’t bad though, just unexpected. Whatever my feelings for him were, he thought of me as a bloodsucker.
“We’re friends?” I asked tentatively.
He looked at me like I’d just said I had an imaginary friend. “Of course we’re friends, dumb-dumb. I didn’t come here for someone I hate.”
And yet, despite everything, it was the first time he’d ever said he felt something higher than repulsion for me. He knew it, by the look on his face, and he wouldn’t meet my eyes again. Sara knocked on the door and I heard him whisper, “Tacos, tacos, tacos,” like he was praying.
“Everyone decent?” she asked as she stepped into the room too quickly for anyone to say no. “I made croissants with custard filling.” I was speechless.
“That’s my favorite food,” I said, in complete shock. I mean, I knew she had powers, but she was good. Like, really good. Which I’d guessed, so I probably shouldn’t have been so shocked.
She nodded happily at me with a secret grin. “I know. You need some armor this week. Nothing helps quite like your favorite food.” She glanced down at Knight, who was waiting patiently for her to announce that she was also making tacos. She didn’t.
Sara had made enough custard croissants to feed ten people. My plate alone could’ve fed Knight for two meals. She was well on her way to fattening me up, as if that was even possible.
I ate half of what she’d given me and fell into a food coma on the bed-sofa. When I woke up, Knight was sitting next to me, reading a book on Civil War history. He didn’t look up when I stirred.
“Is that accurate?” I asked him. I sat up and stretched my arms.
He shrugged. “Kind of one-sided. Leaves out a lot.” He put it down and leaned his head back against the back of the bed-sofa.
I tuned my ears into the rest of the house and found it empty. “Where’s Sara?”
“Grocery shopping. She said she was going to need more pickles.” I giggled. She was a refreshing person. “Speaking of food, you’re due at James’s for blood.” He said it matter-of-factly like I was going there to get my mail. Then he gave me a thoughtful look. “In all this time, I’ve never asked. What do your kind think of mine?”
I held out my fingers to tick off a list. “Dirty. Gross. Hump everything. Something about fleas.” He shoved me with a pillow. “Serious, we do actually think you’re dirty like you don’t shower or something. And you’re gross because you procreate with humans. Eww,” I emphasized. “Also, no self-control, and you get pissed at everything.”
He conceded to that. “That applies to the Lycans. Not me. And I totally shower every day.”
“I never said I thought those things, by the way,” I added. “I thought you were.... passable when we first met.”
He chuckled, and I could see him remembering that day. “I was basically disgusted with you.”
“How about now?” I asked cautiously, trying to be casual.
He thought about it, a half smile on his face. “50% less icky.”
“That’s so generous of you,” I said with a sarcastic smile. “You’re 35% less passable.”
“Awwww, so mean. I think I earned at least 42%. Can I call a friend?”
“Sorry, ballot is out.”
He pelted me with a pillow until I said he was 38% less passable.
Eighteen
With James, it was the same thing every day. I went to his house in the morning and drank from whoever he chose for me. Every day, he kissed me. Just kisses, thankfully. And before he would let me leave, he would brush my hair back and admire his bite. It hadn’t faded, no matter how many days had passed.
At night, he threw various parties.
The orders he’d given me at that first party were all side comments, and they’d carried weight while I was near him. He knew that, so he was careful to make other orders direct commands that I couldn’t disobey, no matter how far away he got.
Sometimes when I left his house in the morning, he’d order me to ignore everyone, or stay indoors, or not speak. Sometimes he made me stay at his house all day and just sit there, not moving.
It was torture.
The worst days were when I wasn’t allowed to see Knight. He made everything seem a little brighter, even if it wasn’t.
About a week had passed when I was sent an invitation to the opera. James had been mentioning it for several days, but he hadn’t set a date yet. There was a youth orchestra here, probably funded by him, and a group of actors that put on performances. James wanted an opera, s
o they were putting on an opera.
He sent a dress, as usual, and I started getting ready. Sara never helped me. Whenever she saw that I’d been sent clothes, she would disappear into a random room of the hotel until I returned, broken and sobbing.
I cried a lot now. Knight was always there. Sometimes I let him hug me while I cried, but only when we’d both had some alcohol first. And he always made me laugh the next morning.
The strapless dress from James was a masterpiece. Black lace, long flowing skirt, decorated with dozens of small black butterflies that danced up the dress to rest on one shoulder and flutter near the even smaller butterflies in my hair. This was a dress I would’ve chosen for myself and I hated that I had to wear it to something I wasn’t looking forward to.
When Knight saw me, he looked a little surprised at the way I looked. I’d spent extra time looking pretty. Not for James. For myself.
“You clean up good,” Knight appraised, and he kissed my hand. That was it? I clean up good? I looked fucking hot, you twat! He helped me lift the bulk of my skirt into the car and I left the hotel with Drake at the wheel.
The opera hall was surprisingly very nice, looking incredibly authentic to the old 19th-century theatres, with decorative gold plating on everything and plush red carpets. It looked almost exactly like certain rooms in the Order. Ah, nostalgia.
James saw me enter the lobby after Drake dropped me off, and he smiled widely at me. “Lisbeth, my dear.” He came up and kissed me on the lips, deeply, like I was his lover. I didn’t kick him in the dick. I was under orders. “You look amazing. Even a fool can see how gorgeous you look.” Apparently, he thought I cleaned up good too. “You are going to love this opera. It’s one of my favorites.” I’d seen the playbill, and I’d already seen this opera over thirty years ago, but I played along.
“I can’t wait,” I told him with a plastered-on smile. He put a hand to my back and led me up to one of the opera boxes, all the while describing the plot of the opera, and spoiling more than a little of the ending. The theatre opened out before me as I stepped into the opera box. It was just as beautiful and breathtaking as the outside and lobby had been. I felt more nostalgia, but for memories that had nothing to do with the Order. It made me relax a little, just remembering happier times. I sat down in one of the two chairs and James sat next to me.
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