When he'd finished, Alice awkwardly held him against her shoulder to burp him and settled him back in his bassinet. The shelling had stopped and an eerie silence hung over the place.
Thoughts of Cameron kept creeping into her mind. She imagined him at the airfield, shells exploding around him while he tended the wounded. Her stomach gave a sick lurch at the thought he might be hurt. Cameron Knight was not like any man she had met before. For the first time in her life, she imagined the possibility of falling in love. Something she had believed would never happen.
She glanced around the neat room at his bag and his bed. She pressed her palm to the pillow. This was where he slept, where he laid his head. Alice kicked off her boots and lifted the bedcover, then slipped underneath and settled her head on the pillow, staring up at the pockmarked cement ceiling above, imagining Cameron lying here looking at the same view.
Crazy as it seemed, in only three days she had started to care for him.
***
"Major Knight."
Cameron turned as a voice behind him called his name. One of the medical technicians stood in the corridor, holding aside the plastic strips that made up the door to the OR. "Lieutenant Colonel Jasper told me to pass on a message, sir."
Cameron blinked, his eyes gritty with tiredness after hours of setting broken bones, stitching wounds, and stabilizing more serious injuries so the soldiers could be safely transported back to the military hospital in the UK.
"What is it, Sergeant?" Cameron said behind his mask.
"The lieutenant colonel says you should take a break, sir."
Cameron turned back to the unconscious man on the table and tied off the last of six stitches to a laceration on the man's arm.
"Can I tell him you'll take a break, sir?"
"Yes," Cameron said without turning around. "In a few minutes. I'll just finish up here."
He examined a couple of other lacerations and put two stitches in one of them. While men were under anesthetic for more serious procedures, he took the opportunity to stitch the minor wounds. It was less stressful for them.
This poor guy had a badly traumatized leg from a blast injury. Cameron had done all he could to clean it up following the protocol his brother Radley had drawn up for removing damaged tissue and stabilizing seriously injured limbs. Whether the lower leg could be saved or not was now up to Radley back in the UK. He specialized in limb salvage.
"All right, you can take him to recovery." He was wheeled away and Cameron pulled off his bloodied plastic apron and gloves and tossed them in the trash.
He acknowledged the medical technician. "Okay, tell Jasper I'm taking a break."
The man hurried off, relief clear on his face.
Cameron followed him along the corridor, stumbling on some debris that had fallen from the wall during the bombardment. This building had once been used as offices by a freight company, but long since abandoned. That was until the NATO forces moved in and adapted it as a field hospital. It was in an ideal location close to the air field and on the right side of Rejerrah. Part of it ran back into the rocky hillside, affording extra protection.
That was where the medical staff had their quarters—where Alice and little Sami were safely tucked away from the frantic race to treat the injured servicemen.
Cameron pushed through the door into what they laughingly called the mess, a small room with a couple of tables surrounded by chairs, and a table bearing a coffee machine and ration packs.
He poured himself a tepid coffee, added dried milk and sugar, and slumped down on a chair with a ration pack in his hand. He took out a cereal bar and chewed with effort. Weariness sapped his appetite, even though he hadn't eaten for hours.
Major Braithwaite came in, her face pale and pinched with fatigue. She silently acknowledged him, grabbed an energy drink, and hurried away again.
At times like this they were all worn down with the mental and physical stress of fighting for the lives of their fellow soldiers. Nobody had energy for social chat. Times like this left Cameron drained. It normally took him a week to recover his usual optimistic outlook on life.
His mind slipped to Alice as it had done often in the last thirty-six hours, as if she were the default setting for his thoughts when he had a moment to relax.
He pictured her as he'd left her standing in his room, wearing her boots, a pale blue hospital gown, and a white sheet wrapped around her skinny body. Her blonde hair straggled around her bumped and bruised face, her nose swollen. Yet there was something about her that tugged at him.
How was she managing with Sami? He'd asked Lieutenant Grace to check on her when she had a moment. Cameron would like to go back and see Alice himself, but he didn't have time. He didn't want the distraction; he needed to concentrate on his work.
Yet his mind focused on Alice, and he couldn't drag it away. Even now, she was probably lying in his bed. He closed his eyes and pictured her there, her blonde hair spread across his pillow. Unwanted emotions flooded up from somewhere deep inside him and wouldn't go away.
He rubbed a hand over his face and blew out a breath. He couldn't have feelings for her. It was unprofessional and inappropriate. She was his injured patient. She simply was not suitable. If he let himself develop feelings for a woman who traipsed all over the world, putting herself in danger, he would be out of his mind with worry most of the time.
And wasn't he a hypocrite?
A groan rumbled in his chest, and he pinched the bridge of his nose.
His father was in the process of getting the baby a visa. Once the work at the hospital died down, Cameron would help Alice negotiate with the authorities so she could take Sami out of the country to the UK. Then he could forget about them and focus on his job.
***
Alice jolted awake and lay in the semi-darkness. Every time she turned over she woke up, either because the cast got in the way or because her arm hurt. The noise of the portable air-conditioning unit droned in the corridor, but the room was still airless and hot.
She kicked aside the thin cover and wiped sweat off her face. She wore panties, along with a T-shirt Lieutenant Grace had given her. Even though the lieutenant was busy, she had made time to check up on Alice every day to make sure she was coping with Sami. Alice liked her a lot.
She rolled over, trying to find a comfortable position for her arm. Her heart gave a little bump at the sight of Cameron lying on a sleeping bag on the floor. Her gaze traveled down his long, lean body stretched out only a few feet away from her, naked except for his underwear. The lamp in the corner of the room cast his form in light and shadow, emphasizing his toned muscles.
Relaxed in sleep, his face appeared almost boyish, the lines of worry gone. But there was nothing boyish about his biceps and the ridges of muscle in his belly. He was in good shape, but then he was a soldier. In the army, even doctors must have to train to keep fit.
Over the last three days she'd exchanged only a few words with him when they'd passed in the corridor. He had asked how she was doing, but he'd been very busy and preoccupied. She didn't think he'd slept in that time. He hadn't been back to his room anyway.
She bit her lip, uncomfortable with this situation. The poor man must be exhausted. He should have the camp bed. The temporary folding bed was just a sheet of canvas on a metal frame. Not especially comfortable, but better than the floor.
"Cameron," she whispered. He didn't stir. Not surprising, she supposed. Although she felt bad about him sleeping on the floor, it was best to let him sleep rather than wake him to change beds.
Sami whimpered and made the sucking sound she knew meant he was hungry. Alice sat up and slid off the bed. Careful not to step on Cameron, she went to the bassinet.
"Hey, sweetie, are you hungry again?" The baby had already put on weight—a born survivor. She slipped on a voluminous white gown Lieutenant Grace had given her, pushed her feet in her boots, and hurried down the corridor to fetch the bottle she had mixed up earlier. After checking the temperatu
re, she returned to the room.
Sami's little grunts and whimpers of hunger had increased, but Cameron slept on. Alice unrolled the plastic changing mat on the bed, laid Sami on it, and changed his diaper. It was still awkward, changing him with only one good hand, but she'd honed her technique and was much quicker now.
She cleaned her hands on an antiseptic wipe and balanced the tiny boy between her crossed legs to feed him. As usual, he sucked down the contents of his bottle quickly.
"You are such a good boy, Sami." She kissed the baby's hair and stroked his cheek, smiling when his head turned towards her finger, seeking the nipple for more milk. "You'll pop if I give you any more." She lifted him up to her shoulder and rubbed his back. "Let's get those burps up so they don't give you a tummy ache."
She rocked him gently, stroking his back and humming softly. This was such a strange setup, almost surreal, living in this windowless room with a baby, trying to keep out of the way and not bother anyone. She had decided a long time ago that her mission in life was to help the vulnerable women and children who so often suffered at the hands of men—to help others avoid going through what she had suffered.
Until she found herself responsible for this poor motherless baby, she'd never had a maternal feeling in her life. Now the thought of passing him on to someone else pinched her heart.
She angled the tiny boy, cradling his head in her palm so she could see his face. He had a split in his lip that went up to his nostril and his shiny pink gum showed in the break. A disfigurement that made his clan reject him. Yet to her he was the most beautiful, special baby in the world.
His eyes had closed, already asleep after his feed. He was such a good baby. No trouble at all. This little guy had stolen her heart. Reluctantly, she settled Sami back in his bassinet and climbed in bed.
She lay on her side, her good arm underneath, and her cast rested on a pillow in front of her, the most comfortable position even though the pillow made her hot. She closed her eyes, but now she had woken she couldn't go back to sleep. Her eyes opened and her gaze strayed to Cameron. Unfamiliar sensations crept through her. It wasn't just Sami who'd stolen her heart; Cameron had touched her emotions as well. Were her feelings for this man real or just a product of the strange circumstances?
Boots echoed in the corridor outside. Low, urgent voices spoke of a medical emergency with one of the patients. As if he were specially attuned to such things, Cameron's eyes opened.
His gaze met hers and held. For long moments they stared at each other in the shadowy room, neither saying a word. Then Cameron pushed up on an elbow.
"Do you need me?" he asked, his tone pitched low to reach the medics in the corridor but not disturb Sami.
"No, you get some sleep, Knight." It was Major Braithwaite who answered. Alice recognized the anesthetist's voice.
Cameron glanced down and noticed he was uncovered. With a mumbled apology, he pulled the sheet up over his hips before he laid his head back on the pillow.
"You should have the bed," Alice whispered.
"No, I'm fine. You learn to sleep anywhere when you're in the army."
One didn't have to be in the army to get used to that. Her mind swept back to the nights when she'd slept on the floor underneath her bed or in her toy cupboard or closet, hiding from her father.
"Sorry I more or less abandoned you," he said, rubbing his eyes. "I've lost track of how many days it's been."
"Three."
"Kelly—I mean, Lieutenant Grace—said you coped well."
"I was fine. I'm glad things have quieted down now, though." Not just because it was awful for the wounded soldiers who'd been through the hospital, but because she had missed Cameron.
A question popped into Alice's head. Normally she wouldn't dream of asking him such a personal thing, but in the intimate darkness of the small room, they felt more like friends than doctor and patient. "Is Kelly your girlfriend?"
Cameron's gaze sharpened as if the question woke him up. "She used to be, but not anymore."
"Ahh." That explained why they seemed to be close.
"I was going to tell you tomorrow, my father sent across a visa for Sami. He can legally enter the UK now."
"That's great." She didn't ask how Cameron's father had managed such a thing so quickly. She was just relieved he had. "I need to go to the government offices in Rejerrah and inquire about taking him out of the country for medical treatment."
"Do you speak the language?"
"Just enough to get by."
"I'll come with you. I'm pretty good with languages, and I don't like the idea of you going on your own."
"Thanks, Cameron."
He grinned. "You're welcome." He reached up and ran a finger along her forearm. That simple touch sent tingling fire streaking across her skin.
His grin fell away and they stared at each other, his brown eyes dark and mysterious in the low light.
"Best get some more sleep," Cameron said.
Alice nodded, a flurry of mixed emotions charging through her. She liked Cameron, really liked him. If she had met him under different circumstances, she might have wanted to explore these feelings she had for him. But right now Sami had to be her first and only priority.
Chapter Four
"You're a maverick, Major. You don't follow the rules," Lieutenant Colonel Jasper said, frowning.
Cameron sat across the desk from his commanding officer in a tiny room with one wall half-demolished after the recent bombardment. Dust coated everything, even though they'd tried to clean up.
He'd come here to tell Jasper that he'd let Alice and Sami bunk in his room while the hospital was busy, deciding it was best to come clean rather than wait for Jasper to find out from someone else.
"It's only because you're such a good doctor that you get away with it."
Cameron knew Jasper was right, although he preferred to think of himself as a dedicated doctor. He only ever broke rules to help his patients. He might be an army officer, but he was a doctor first. Patients came before rules. Fighting to save lives on a daily basis had a way of focusing the mind on what was important in life. Usually it wasn't a rule dreamed up by a bureaucrat in the Ministry of Defense.
The lieutenant colonel flattened his palm on the desk and stared at it for a moment. "Is the girl still bunking in your room?"
"No, sir. As soon as we had the space, I moved her back onto the ward. This morning, actually."
"Good. Then we'll say no more about it." He straightened and cleared his throat. "Let's move on to other business. I hear your brother has been promoted to colonel. I'm not at all surprised. An exceptional man, your brother. I served with him in Afghanistan a few years ago. He impressed me greatly."
Cameron smiled. "I hadn't heard. That's great." And it was. But a strange hollow feeling punched through his solar plexus. All his life he'd tried to match up to his older brother. He'd thought if he worked hard and did his best, he would be as good as Radley. It never worked out that way.
Radley had something special, a star quality that set him apart—and Cameron didn't have it. He was the one who screwed up and let his parents down.
Radley traveled the world speaking at medical symposia about his limb-salvage techniques. He had the glittering career, the beautiful wife, and the lovely children. He even had Cameron's son.
Cameron averted his gaze, perturbed by his flash of resentment. He'd thought he'd come to terms with the situation years ago. Although he loved his son, he hadn't been ready to be a husband and father. He'd accepted that George would grow up thinking Radley was his father while Cameron played the part of uncle. Every time he returned to the UK on leave, he made a point of seeing his son.
Maybe it was being around Alice and Sami that had stirred up Cameron's feelings again. He didn't want to dwell on this. He should have put the issue behind him long ago.
"I'd like permission to take a couple of hours to accompany Alice Conway to the government building. She wants to take the orphaned baby
with the cleft lip back to the UK for treatment. My father has secured a visa but we're not sure what the legalities are on this end."
"Best if you ride with one of the patrols. Things are a little sticky after the recent bombardment. Some of the locals blame NATO for the escalation in the attacks. They don't want to admit the rebels would have overrun the city months ago if we weren't here."
Cameron stood. "Thank you, sir. Good suggestion."
He headed for the door to take Alice the news. Although he tried to focus on the issue of Sami, thoughts of his son still drifted through the back of his mind, memories of when he was a tiny baby, of the excitement Cameron had felt the first time he saw him and realized the baby boy was his.
Cameron turned into an empty room, closed his eyes, and pressed his back against the rough stone wall. He sucked in a couple of deep breaths and blew them out, willing himself to relax and let his remorse go. He didn't want to feel like this when he went home on leave for George's birthday. His relatives were bound to pick up on his mood. Despite his feelings, he knew he'd made the right decision for his son. Radley was a much better father than Cameron could ever hope to be.
***
Alice stepped out of the field hospital into the blistering heat, the sky unbroken blue, stretching to the horizon. Across the desert, the ramshackle tents and cabins of the refugee camp formed a jumbled pattern against a backdrop of distant mountains.
Cameron put a hand under her elbow and pointed at a sandy-colored military vehicle parked a short distance away. One soldier was already on top, manning a gun.
"We're going in the Foxhound. I'll ride up front," Cameron said. "You go in the back. It's probably safer."
She climbed in and shuffled past the legs of the gunner, then pulled down a folding seat behind the driver and sat down. Under her voluminous floor-length robe that covered her T-shirt and shorts, Cameron had strapped up her cast in a sling. It helped ease the ache in her shoulder.
Cameron hopped in the front passenger seat and dumped his medical backpack on the floor near her. She leaned forward to see out the windshield, scrunching the fabric of her robe in her hand nervously. She had expected to catch a taxi to the government building, not ride with a patrol. This seemed a little over the top.
The Army Doctor's Wedding Page 3