Contents
Title Page
The Lost Desert
1. The Blue Snake
2. Can Water Fly?
3. The Lucky Hat
4. Who Nibbled A Whole Hippopotamus?
5. The Sun Lock
6. Hunting Peaches
7. The Spank of Fire
8. The Hungry God
9. Mushroom and Cucumber Sandwiches
10. The Wrath of Conk
11. The Deadly Whisper
12. Thank You, Bootlace!
Dedication
About the Author
About the Illustrator
Also in this Series
Copyright
The Blue Snake
It was morning in the Lost Desert. The sunlight was shining on the ruins of an old temple hidden among the giant rocks, and a bright blue rattlesnake was quietly dozing high up on a window ledge. Suddenly …
PLOP!
A fat raindrop splatted down on to the snake’s head. The snake opened a beady eye and saw a huge black cloud shutting out the sun. The snake knew the raindrop hadn’t been an accident. Softly, it uncoiled itself, then listened out very carefully. Sure enough, there was the sound of something climbing up from below. The snake opened its mouth wide so its fangs were ready to strike, then it peered over the edge to see who or what was coming.
‘GOTCHA!’
A dirty hand grabbed the snake by the neck and dragged it off the ledge. The snake thrashed around helplessly in the air, then realised it was being stared in the face by a chubby little savage. The snake tried to stretch forward and sink its fangs into his nose, but the savage just laughed.
‘You ARE a beauty!’ said Borgon the Axeboy.
HISS! SPIT! Rattle rattle! went the snake angrily.
‘Behave yourself,’ laughed Borgon.
He scrambled back down the wall, holding the snake out at arm’s length.
Three more savages were waiting at the bottom. Grizzy was the girl with the shoulder bag, Mungoid was the chunky one and Hunjah was the skinny one with the big straw hat. All four of them lived in a circle of caves known as Golgarth Basin, and that morning they had been exploring when Borgon had spotted the snake.
Of course, any sensible savage would have kept well away from the snake, but Borgon was not a sensible savage. He was a barbarian, which meant he was one of the fiercest, scariest and maddest savages in the desert. For Borgon there was no such thing as fear, there was only fun, and that’s why catching rattlesnakes was one of his favourite tricks.
‘Look at this!’ said Borgon, as he jumped to the ground. ‘I’m going to keep it for a pet.’
‘Put it back!’ said Hunjah nervously.
‘Not likely,’ said Borgon. ‘I’ve never seen a blue rattlesnake before.’
‘Me neither,’ said Mungoid. ‘Rattlers are supposed to be yellow or brown so they can hide in the rocks.’
‘That’s not a normal rattlesnake,’ said Hunjah nervously. ‘It’s a guard snake.’
‘Rubbish,’ said Grizzy. ‘Whoever heard of a guard snake? What’s it supposed to be guarding?’
‘The temple!’ said Hunjah. ‘I’ve just recognised it. My mum used to be a priestess here. She took me inside once when I was small and she warned me about the blue snakes.’
‘So what happened to this place?’ asked Mungoid, looking up at the ruins. ‘Doesn’t anybody come here any more?’
‘Not since the earthquake,’ said Hunjah.
‘EARTHQUAKE?’ gasped the others.
‘Did the land split open and mountains collapse?’ asked Mungoid.
‘Not really,’ said Hunjah sadly. ‘But the temple wobbled a bit and some big stones fell off, so everybody decided it was unsafe and stopped coming.’
‘Not everybody!’ said Borgon, holding up the snake. ‘This guy’s still here.’
‘You’d better let the snake go,’ said Hunjah. ‘Or you’ll upset the temple god.’
‘Who cares?’ said Borgon. ‘I’m a BARBARIAN! If there is a god still in there, he should be more worried about upsetting me. YARGHHHH!’
KABLOOSH!
A blast of rain came down and sploshed Borgon from head to toe. The hot sand around his feet fizzed and gave off a cloud of steam.
‘HA HA HA!’ laughed Grizzy.
‘It’s not funny,’ said Hunjah. ‘That was the god sending Borgon a warning.’
‘Don’t be so pathetic, Hunjah,’ said Grizzy. ‘This temple is a wreck. No sensible god would still be hanging around when there’s no one coming to worship him.’
‘Are you sure?’ asked Mungoid, looking uncertain. ‘It’s funny how that bit of rain just hit Borgon and nothing else.’
Borgon looked at the ground. There was only one wet patch and he was standing in the middle of it. The snake gave its tail a little waggle. It seemed to be laughing at him.
‘If there is a god here wanting to scare me, he’ll have to try harder than that!’ said Borgon.
Above them the dark cloud rumbled. Mungoid looked up nervously.
‘Maybe you shouldn’t have said that,’ said the chunky savage.
‘Drop the snake,’ said Hunjah. ‘Or the god will make it worse.’
‘Oh really?’ said Borgon. ‘So what’s he going to do then?’
More rain started coming down, and this time it was hitting all of them.
‘Told you!’ said Hunjah.
‘Oh, be quiet, you three,’ said Grizzy. ‘There’s no god around here!’
‘There might be,’ said Mungoid nervously.
‘There IS!’ insisted Hunjah.
‘No there is NOT!’ said Grizzy. ‘It’s just rain and I’m getting wet, so let’s go.’
The four of them dashed round the outside of the temple looking for cover, then Borgon fell over and landed flat on his face.
BLOMP!
The snake slipped out of his hand then whipped round to strike at him. Borgon just managed to roll aside, and snatch the creature up by the neck again.
‘You were lucky there,’ said Hunjah. ‘The god tripped you up on purpose.’
‘No he didn’t,’ said Borgon.
‘Hunjah’s right!’ said Mungoid. ‘There’s a giant foot sticking out of the sand!’
‘That’s not a god’s foot,’ said Grizzy looking around. ‘It’s just part of a statue. There’s broken bits of arms and legs lying all over the place.’
Sure enough, there was.
‘I remember that statue,’ said Hunjah. ‘It was a giant soldier, and he used to stand outside the temple door. Look!’
Hunjah was pointing at a small archway in the temple wall, which was completely sealed off by a flat slab of stone. The rain was coming down even harder.
‘How does it open, Hunjah?’ asked Grizzy. ‘Quick, I’m soaking.’
‘The stone slides upwards,’ said Hunjah. ‘But it can only be lifted by the god himself.’
‘Then tell him to get on with it, if you’re so sure he’s here,’ said Grizzy.
Meanwhile Borgon and Mungoid were admiring the snake.
‘Look at those fangs!’ said Borgon. ‘This fella could bring down an elephant.’
‘Then you’d better let him go!’ said Mungoid.
‘You worry too much,’ laughed Borgon.
‘But what if Hunjah’s god is real?’ said Mungoid. ‘Some of these old desert gods can do strange and terrible things. He might turn the snake into a giant serpent and swallow you up!’
‘Then I’ll be ready for it!’ said Borgon, waving his axe excitedly. ‘YARGHHH!’
Hunjah was tapping on the temple door politely.
‘Hello? Excuse me?
Yoo-hoo!’
Nothing happened.
Grizzy pointed at a small dark hole drilled high into the side of the arch. Around it was carved an image of the sun.
‘What’s that for?’ she asked.
‘I don’t know,’ said Hunjah. ‘Maybe we have to talk into it.’
‘Let me try,’ said Grizzy. ‘Hey, Mungoid, help me up!’
The chunky savage went to stand by the arch, then Grizzy climbed up and stood on his head. She shouted into the hole. ‘HEY YOU! If you ARE a god in there, OPEN UP!’
Still nothing happened, and the rain was still falling.
‘Oh, what a surprise,’ said Grizzy. She jumped down to the ground. ‘There’s no god, and I’m soaking. Come on, you lot, there must be somewhere we can shelter.’
The temple was built into the side of a small cliff. Halfway up, a withered old cactus was growing near the entrance to a small tunnel. They scrambled up the rocks and ducked inside, then stood there shivering, looking out at the water hitting the hot rocks and hissing up into little puffs of steam.
‘This is all your fault, Borgon!’ said Hunjah. ‘Let the snake go, and then the god might forgive you.’
‘For the last time, there isn’t a god!’ said Grizzy.
‘That’s not fair,’ said Borgon. ‘There might be a god, but maybe he’s just a bit pathetic, like Hunjah is.’
‘Thanks, Borgon!’ said Hunjah happily. ‘See, Grizzy? Borgon believes me.’
‘So what’s this god of yours called then?’ asked Grizzy.
‘His followers know him as …’
Hunjah paused, then put on his deepest and most serious voice.
‘… the Great Conk.’
‘The Great Conk?’ repeated the others. ‘Ha ha ha ha ha!’
KAKKA-KABOOSH!
A lightning bolt hit the old cactus, which burst into flames.
‘Ooh!’ said Hunjah. ‘I didn’t know he could do that.’
Can Water Fly?
Borgon, Mungoid, Grizzy and Hunjah were still sitting in the tunnel entrance waiting for the rain to stop. A little stream of water was coming down the side of the cliff, running past their feet and disappearing down into the darkness of the tunnel. Borgon was holding the snake and stroking its head. The poor beast had given up wriggling and was now just looking very fed up.
‘This is getting boring,’ said Grizzy.
‘Then let the snake go!’ said Hunjah.
‘Why?’ asked Borgon. ‘It’s just a snake.’
‘No it is NOT!’ insisted Hunjah. ‘It is a servant of the Great Conk.’
‘I’m fed up of hearing about this stupid god of yours,’ said Grizzy. ‘There’s no such thing as the Great Conk.’
‘Oh really?’ said Hunjah. ‘Then where do you think this rain is coming from? I’ll tell you – he’s sending it down out of his big nose!’
‘His BIG NOSE?’ said the other three. They all looked out of the tunnel entrance.
‘I can’t see a big nose,’ said Grizzy. ‘Just a dirty black cloud.’
‘It is a bit nose-shaped though,’ said Mungoid.
‘So it is!’ agreed Borgon.
‘So what?’ snapped Grizzy. ‘Rain does NOT come out of a god’s nose. It’s all explained in here.’
She pulled a thick book from her bag. It was called the Book of All Things and it knew everything about everything, and even a little bit more. Grizzy flicked through the pages.
‘Aha! Found it!’ she said. ‘How rain is made … the sun heats up water in lakes and it rises up into the air.’
‘You mean the sun makes the water fly?’ gasped Mungoid.
‘I suppose so,’ said Grizzy. ‘Then the water turns into a cloud, and then the cloud flies over us and the water falls down again.’
‘Ha ha ha!’ laughed the boys.
‘You mean to say that big cloud up there is a load of flying water?’ said Mungoid.
‘But water is heavy!’ said Hunjah. ‘Why doesn’t it all just fall down at once with a big SPLOSH?’
‘Hunjah’s got a point,’ said Borgon. ‘What do you think, Mungoid? Is that a cloud of flying water, or is it a god’s nose?’
‘Water can’t fly,’ said Mungoid. ‘So Hunjah must be right. That cloud MUST be the Great Conk’s nose!’
‘No it is NOT!’ said Grizzy crossly.
‘There’s one way to find out,’ said Hunjah. ‘Borgon lets the snake go, and we see if the rain stops.’
‘Of course it won’t stop,’ said Grizzy.
But Hunjah stuck his head out of the cave and shouted up at the cloud.
‘Oh, Great Conk! Please stop the rain when Borgon lets the snake go!’
‘Hang on!’ said Borgon. ‘I never agreed to let it go.’
‘But you have to!’ said Hunjah. ‘Or Grizzy won’t believe me.’
‘Too right I won’t believe you,’ giggled Grizzy.
‘Please, Borgon,’ said Hunjah. ‘Please?’
Borgon sighed. Hunjah was looking really upset, and there was only one way to settle the argument. Borgon held up the snake so he could speak to it face to face.
‘Are you going to behave?’ he asked.
The snake just stuck out its tongue rudely.
‘I’m warning you,’ said Borgon. ‘When I put you down, if you try to be clever, I’ll slice you into bootlaces.’
The others all backed away as far as they could.
‘You’re not letting it go in here?’ asked Grizzy.
‘He’ll be fine,’ said Borgon.
He put the snake on the ground then released its neck. The snake snapped at Borgon’s hand, but it wasn’t fast enough. The axeboy slapped the side of its head.
‘I’m warning you,’ he said. ‘Bootlaces!’
The snake slithered away, following the stream of water down into the darkness of the tunnel, shaking its tail as it went …
Rattle rattle rattle …
The rattling tail got quieter and quieter, and as it did so the rain stopped and the sun came out.
‘Told you, Grizzy!’ said Hunjah, with a happy little smile.
Grizzy slammed her book shut. ‘That was just luck,’ she snapped.
Suddenly, a much louder sound came booming out of the darkness:
RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE!
‘What’s that?’ asked Hunjah.
‘I’m going to find out!’ said Borgon.
‘Watch out, Borgon,’ said Mungoid. ‘Maybe the Great Conk HAS turned the snake into a giant serpent.’
Borgon pulled out his axe and grinned. ‘Then I’ll be making a lot of bootlaces!’
The Lucky Hat
Borgon followed the little stream of water down into the dark tunnel. The path got narrower and narrower and darker and darker, it twisted and turned and soon everything was too black to see. Ahead he could hear the snake waiting for him.
RATTLE rattle HISSS! RATTLE HISS! Rattle RATTLE!
Borgon’s shoulders were bruised from scraping along the walls, his feet were soaking from stepping in the water, his face was covered in old sticky cobwebs, and he was on his way to fight a giant serpent in the dark.
‘YARGHHH!’ shouted Borgon happily.
Some days being a barbarian was just such good fun.
Finally he came to a dead end. Borgon felt around the walls and realised he was standing in a small chamber. The rattle noise stopped and the last echoes faded away to silence. Borgon couldn’t see a thing, but the barbarian wasn’t worried. He held his breath and listened, with his axe ready to strike at the first sound of movement.
‘Where are you?’ he whispered. ‘Come on!’
Borgon walked around, scuffing the ground with his feet to see if he could find the snake. Suddenly …
‘WAAAAA …!’
Borgon yelped in surprise as his legs fell through two holes in the floor and his bottom hit the ground with a solid BUMP. It was like wearing a big pair of solid stone pants. He could feel his feet dangling in empty space and, worst of all, the water f
rom the tunnel was pouring into the top of his trousers, running down his legs and out past his boots.
‘… AHHHHH!’
Borgon’s cry was still echoing around, even though he’d stopped shouting. There was a flicker in the darkness.
‘There he is!’ said Mungoid’s voice.
The chunky savage was making his way down the tunnel holding a burning branch from the old cactus and leading the other two.
‘Oh no!’ said Hunjah. ‘Borgon’s been bitten in half by the giant serpent!’
‘Sadly not,’ said Grizzy.
‘There’s no giant serpent,’ said Borgon. ‘There’s just a giant ECHO!’
Echo echo echo …
As Mungoid brought the flame closer, Borgon could see that the wall had two more holes that were side by side like little windows.
Mungoid and Hunjah took Borgon’s arms and heaved him up on to his feet. They looked down the floor holes, but all they could see was the water dripping away and falling into darkness.
Mungoid shouted out through one of the holes in the wall.
‘Hell-oo!’
HELL-OOOO! the echo boomed back loud and low, making all their teeth shake.
‘Wow!’ said Mungoid. ‘The blue snake must have crawled in there, and that’s why the rattles are so loud.’
‘I want a go!’ said Hunjah.
He stuck his head out of one of the holes and shouted …
‘Hell … oh no!’
HELL … OH NOOOOOOO! came the echo.
Hunjah pulled his head back.
‘Where’s your hat gone?’ asked Grizzy.
‘It fell off!’ said Hunjah, panicking. ‘My mum will go mad. I need to wear it all the time to stop the sun cooking my brain.’
‘It’s down there,’ said Mungoid, looking through one of the floor holes. ‘You’re lucky, I think it’s caught on something.’
‘I’ll try to reach it,’ said Hunjah. He stuck his hand down the hole.
Borgon the Axeboy and the Whispering Temple Page 1