"Fuck, baby." He growls, wedging his knee up higher on the step and giving himself leverage to drive harder. The hard wood presses roughly into my back and while I know it should hurt like hell, it doesn't. All I am able to concentrate on is how we are joined together, and how amazing it feels. I glance down and watch as he glides in and out of me, and I marvel at how perfect we look together, as if we were made for each other. His endurance is impressive, and just when I think I can't take anymore, I reach a crescendo and climax around him. I let out an incoherent cry as my body trembles under his weight and he follows my lead. We hold each other as we come down, unable to speak but saying everything without words. Something happened here that was more than just great sex. In this state of mind I'm not able to completely comprehend, but I know there's more. He kisses me a few more times before lifting me off the stairs and carrying me to his bed, where we fall asleep, fully sated, and completely spent.
Sleeping in someone else's bed has always been difficult for me. I opened my eyes sometime after five in the morning and can't get back to sleep. I contemplate sneaking out, but I’m not really sure what kind of neighborhood I'm in. I slip quietly out of bed and pause to look at the beautiful man lying on his stomach next to where I had just been. I still feel him everywhere on my body. There isn't a single speck of skin that hasn't been touched by his skilled hands or mouth. I sigh deeply and walk quietly to the bathroom. I empty my bladder and brush my teeth with my finger and some toothpaste I find lying next to the sink. I stand naked in front of the mirror and run my fingertips over the small bruises left along my neck and breasts. I had been awakened sometime in the early morning hours by Jesse's lips on my breast and his hand between my legs and during that heated exchange he had left me those little reminders. My eyes continue down and I see another just above my pubic bone, and one more on my inner thigh. I sigh, remembering that one. He placed it there just after giving me one of the most intense orgasms of my life, surpassed only by the one that immediately followed. My fingers instinctively go there, touching the mark, almost as if my touch will preserve it there forever. This man may be young, but he fucks like he's been doing it for years. I went into this knowing that it was just for tonight, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't long for many more nights of the same intensity.
I may be young, but I'm no fool. I know that a man like this comes along once, maybe twice, in a lifetime. Since luck has never been on my side, I'm pretty sure that this is my once in a lifetime.
I switch off the light, ending my trip down the road of my sexual memory lane, and climb back into bed beside him. He's still lying in the same position, but when I settle I feel his hand reach out for me, searching in the darkness and settling on my left breast. His breathing is steady, but his nimble fingers move expertly over my nipple, pulling it taut and teasing until I'm nearly panting. I love when a man plays with my breasts, always have, and this musician plays me like a finely tuned instrument. His hand skims down my torso, and those same skilled fingers part my folds and slip inside my already wet center, moving back and forth slowly, but with determination. I feel his body press into mine and realize that while he may still be half asleep, his cock is fully awake and pressing up against my thigh. I reach my hand down and stroke him slowly, but purposefully. I know he may be sleepy, but right now I am selfish, and I want him awake. In my heart I know that this will all be over soon, and in this moment I want nothing more than to let him have his way with me, however many more times he has the strength for. He wakes with a soft moan and climbs on top of me, hovering above me so his weight is resting on his forearms, and his thick hair is falling around his handsome face.
When he enters, he does it slowly, and I know this time is nothing like the previous times he's taken me. Last night we fucked, hard. Now, he's taking his time and savoring the moment. This time, he's making love to me, just as he promised. His movements are slow, and determined. With every powerful thrust he doesn't just claim me, he owns me, and I give myself over willingly. I don’t think about tomorrow, my job or the boss I hate. I only think about how incredibly perfect and right it feels to be looking at him as he stares into my eyes and takes me over the edge once again. As my body trembles beneath him I only focus on how incredible it feels to scream out his name, over and over, until he fills me with his own release. When it's over, and he's covering me in small kisses, telling me how incredibly perfect I am, it's only then that he stops to ask my name.
I open my mouth to answer and I draw a complete blank.
He lets out a throaty chuckle and I smile, kissing him once more as I cup his perfect face in my hands. "You know, it doesn't even matter." He places his forehead to mine once again and kisses me softly on the lips. "Thank you, for everything. I'll never forget this night for as long as I live.
"Neither will I, baby." He said, stroking his thumb over my parted lips. "Neither will I."
We fall asleep in each other's arms, and I manage to sleep several more hours before I open my eyes and remember where I am. I slip out of bed once again, and grab what clothes I can find off the floor. I dress quietly in the bathroom and walk through the bedroom towards the door, pausing to take one last look at the man who has forever changed me. Never again will I settle for satisfactory kissing, boring sex, or a lover that doesn't believe in oral sex. This man has introduced me to a world where real men excel in all of the above and are willing to prove it to the right woman. I pray that one day I will find someone like him again. I close the door and walk down the hall and into the kitchen. Everywhere I look is a reminder of where he claimed me the night before. I find myself wondering if he will look at these same surfaces and think the same thing. Somehow, I doubt he will, but for one brief moment I allow myself to believe that somewhere, in the back of his mind, a little piece of me will remain with him forever. I find a pad of paper and a pen, and in a moment of weakness I leave a quick note.
Jesse,
Thank you for the best night of my life. I know I will remember it always, well, at least until the marks fade away, and then somehow I know I will continue to feel your lips on my skin. You have shown me what it feels like to be treated like a real woman, and for that I will be forever grateful. Never again will I settle for mediocrity, you have given me a taste of perfection, and now I have an insatiable hunger.
Good luck with your band. I wish you all the future success you could ever dream of, and more. You are a great guy and you deserve to have it all.
Thank you for showing me what it feels like to let go and forget my own name, even if it was only for one night.
For the record, my name is Rhyann Michaels, and I hope that someday our paths cross again and I am able to repay the favor and make you forget your name. As for me, your name is one I will never forget, nor do I ever want to.
Forever grateful, Rhyann
I didn't hear from him after that night. The reasonable side of me knew I never would, but I'd be lying if I told you that a part of me kind of hoped that he would look me up. Not long after that night, I read online that his band, Twisted Fate, had been signed by a famous producer, and I knew that someone like me would never be able to keep up with someone as wild and free as Jesse Montgomery. Yeah, thanks to the media, I now had a last name to go with the man I still dreamed of. The man who showed me how it felt to be desired. The only man to show me what love could feel like, without actually loving me at all. Even if he was on to bigger and better things, I was thankful for the time that we shared. But secretly, I hoped that one day our paths would cross again.
CHAPTER ONE
Two years later
You’re an ass!” I screamed at my boss, Steve, as I attempted to shove him off me. The color drained from his face as the words left my mouth. He had been ordering me around from the moment I arrived at work this morning. Hell, he had been ordering me around for the past two years, I never really thought too much of it before, after all he was my boss. It wasn’t unusual for him to be in a bad mood, but lately I had bee
n on the receiving end of what I could only refer to as cruel and unusual punishment. Nothing I did seemed to be good enough for him. Our working relationship had started off rocky with him leering at me on a daily basis, but that was as far as it went. Then, that all changed during one drunken night in Vegas six months ago when I rebuked his affections. From that point forward he began speaking to me in harsher tones and gave me mindless projects that were well beneath my abilities. I knew what he had been trying to do; he wanted to wear me down in hopes that I would welcome his advances, seeing them as a way out of the hell I had spiraled into. But I didn’t break. Instead, I arrived at work every day with a smile on my face, hopeful that things would be better, that’s what I’m good at, pretending things are okay even when they are really, really bad.
This morning, on my way into the office, he had texted asking if I would stop by the mall during lunch and pick up a birthday gift for his wife. I ran the errand and grabbed a quick coffee at my favorite café before heading back up the stairs to my office. I had just knocked on Steve’s door to drop off the gift when he asked me to meet with him. I should have known something was off when he locked the door behind me, and casually closed the blinds. I had just placed the gift on his desk when I felt him snake an arm around my waist as he brushed his lower half up against my hip. I immediately tensed and tried to pull away, knowing what was coming next. He would most likely start off with something sensual, or at least what he considered to be sensual, and then back it up with something vulgar, before finally becoming downright mean and nasty. It was always the same story. There was a part of me that asked myself why I hadn’t just given in to him, thus putting an end to the cold treatment, but my pride and self-esteem wouldn’t allow me to cave. I was grateful for that. I may have been optimistic, but I wasn’t a fool. Giving in to his sexual desires would have only appeased him for a while, eventually he would have become bored with me and I would have found myself looking for a new job.
“Come on baby, you know you want it,” he hissed. I felt the nasty wetness of his spittle smacking against my cheek, and it was all I could do not to throw up. I wiped my hand furiously across my face to remove any residue of him.
“You’re delirious, why would you think I want you? You haven’t been nice to me in the two years I've worked for you. The only time you pay attention to me is when you're trying to get in my pants.”
He ran a finger down the length of my arm before responding, leering at me the whole time. “Now that’s no way to speak to your boss, Ms. Michaels. Come home with me tonight and let me make it up to you. My wife is out of town.” His voice was thick and his breath smelled of alcohol. That had to be the reason for his boldness. He may have been inappropriate in the past, but he had never spoken to me like this, not when he knew it could cost him his career. He may be acting reckless now, but he was a smart man, he knew I wouldn't report him. I needed this job.
He yanked hard on my arm, pulling me to him as his other hand reached up and squeezed my breast. “Don’t be a tease. I’ve seen the way you look at me.” His gaze drifted down my body before his lips brushed over my ear. “You wear these sexy skirts and tight sweaters that reveal your tits. It’s hard for a man to think about anything else when he knows that something as delicious as you is sitting just outside his office.” I felt the tip of his tongue snake over the shell of my ear and a sickening chill ran through my body. “I know you think about being spread out over my desk. I’m about to make your dreams come true.”
What? My mind is racing. Nothing, I repeat, nothing could have been further from the truth. Steve Nelson was the kind of man that most women wouldn’t take a second look at. He was of average height, and in fairly good shape, but his blonde curly hair and crooked teeth left a lot to be desired. I preferred men with dark good looks and a nice smile. Based on my observations of Steve during the course of my employment I would safely assume that the only reason his wife had settled had been because of the large bankroll that came with him. He had come from money and, thanks to his father’s legacy in the legal world, had made partner faster than any one else at Morton & Waters.
As I listened to the words coming out of his vile mouth, I decided that I couldn’t take another second of his abuse, alcohol induced or not. The anger that I felt with myself for sitting idly by for months while allowing him to get off on causing me emotional grief spilled out in one giant force. I turned to face him and he thought that I was about to kiss him. Instead, I brought my knee up hard making direct contact with his groin causing him to double over in pain.
“You bitch!” he yelled, gasping and coughing as he struggled to right himself.
“Go to hell! I’ve never had any desires or fantasies about you. You’re disgusting, and I quit.” I couldn’t believe I was actually having this conversation out loud. I had rehearsed it over and over in my head before, but never thought it would come to fruition. Now that the words were out there it felt like a really bad nightmare and I wanted desperately to wake up. What had I done to deserve this type of treatment? I had never given him any indication that I was remotely interested in having sex with him.
“You can’t quit. You’re fired Rhyann. You hear me? Fired. You will never work in this city again,” he grunted, still bent over in pain. I silently prayed his junk would split in two.
“Good, I have put up with enough of your crap these past two years to last me a lifetime.” I raised my leg and shoved a foot hard against his ass, knocking him to the floor. “That’s for the two years of hell you put me through. Asshole!” I slammed the door and grabbed my belongings from my desk. I held my head high as I walked past all of the stunned faces that pretended not to have overheard what had just taken place less than fifty feet from them. As I made my way past their desks they refused to make eye contact, as if deeply engrossed in their computer screens. I had gotten used to it. For six years most of the employees had lived in a fantasy world created by management. Life in the office was perfect as far as they were concerned. The unspoken motto had been to keep your head down and mind your own business. As long as you kept your mouth shut you would get a nice bonus. Well, screw them all. For the past six months most of them had stood by and failed to report the heinous treatment I had endured. Even I had failed to report it, mostly out of fear. Well they could all deal with him now because I sure as hell wouldn’t be. I almost felt sorry for the poor sap that would replace me. Almost.
Once I stepped into the elevator, I had a moment to ponder what had just happened and felt an immediate sense of relief followed by nausea and self-doubt. I had saved enough money to get me through at least six months and still live comfortably, but finding a job might prove to be difficult. Steve had threatened to blackball me; he had a lot of connections in the city. I had been an administrative assistant for the past five years, it was truly all I knew how to do, and I was good at it.
As I drove home I called Trevor for moral support. We had been casually dating for the past month, but with both of us working long hours, it had been difficult finding time for one another. We had gone out on dates, and there had been a great deal of kissing and touching, but I hadn’t consented to anything beyond that. He was a great guy, but extremely selfish in many ways, and something about the way he acted led me to believe that he would never live up to the type of lover I needed him to be. I had known how amazing sex could be with the right man, and I'd told myself after that night that I would never again settle for anything less.
When I met Trevor I only started dating him because I was lonely. Mel had set us up on a blind date, thinking that it might be just a one-night stand. Ever since my wild night with a rockstar, she was forever trying to talk me into having sex with strangers, but I always brushed her off, knowing it wouldn't be the same. When Trevor and I met, we got along well enough and decided to give a relationship a try. He had been interning for several months at a local law firm and was trying to land a job at a firm in Portland. He had just returned from a second interview a
nd I wanted to see how it had gone. After the third ring he picked up.
“Hey there, how was your day?” His voice sounded oddly upbeat. “Wait a minute, it’s the middle of the day, how are you calling me? Aren’t you at work?” He was painfully aware of Steve’s strict policy of not using the phone for private calls during work hours. I had probably spent far too many hours whining to him about my boss.
“No, I’m not at work, I’m in my car. Ugh! I had such a bad morning. I got fired or quit, I don’t really know which it was,” I sighed, loudly.
My Only Regret (Twisted Fate Book 1) Page 3