by Aycart, Elle
“There’s nothing to tell yet,” Con said. Although Greta might suspect something, because she’d been giving him funny looks lately. Probably the fact that he was eating and sleeping again hadn’t escaped her.
His three friends snorted. “We beg to differ,” Cole said.
There was no winning with this crowd. Con had left his duffel bag in the locker room, so he walked to it, the three guys in tow.
“Can you explain to us why you’re teaching your woman to kill you?” Mike asked. “It seems counterproductive to me.”
“Yep,” Cole added. “You’re ass over heels in love with her. She already has enough weapons against you. You don’t need to offer her more.”
“I need her to be able to knock me down,” Con admitted after a pause.
“Why?”
They were alone in the locker room. Con had planned to just pick up his bag and leave, like he’d done every other time the guys tried to get something out of him, but he changed his mind. Audrey had been able to accept this. They should too.
For the most part, she had kept a stiff upper lip while he’d told her about the torture. Next day, though, her eyes had been extremely red. She’d waved it off with some nonsense about allergies. She was a civilian without combat experience. These three had seen their share of action.
“In case I lose it,” Con said and took off his hoodie. He wouldn’t have dared to do that a couple weeks ago, but it was different now. He was different now, almost like a huge weight had been lifted off his chest.
The three men stilled at the sight of his bared chest.
As Con turned, chattering came from outside, and someone tried to open the door. Cole, who was closest, shot out a hand and slammed it closed. “Not now,” he barked.
Everyone knew Cole. His tone was intimidating enough for whoever was trying to enter to back off.
Con broke the deafening silence. “MIA behind enemy lines for several months.”
He wasn’t allowed to go into specifics, but specifics weren’t needed. His friends knew he hadn’t been behind a desk.
“This is the real reason for my discharge. This and a volatile case of PTSD.”
Con spared his friends the gory details he’d shared with Audrey. There was no need to explain what had been done to him. All of them had served. Cole had done three tours as a Marine. They could easily figure out the level of torture required to achieve the present results.
“Why didn’t you tell us earlier?” Mike demanded. “Fuck, man. You should have told us.”
“I didn’t want to. Still don’t.” But coming clean to Audrey had felt liberating. Besides, at some point they would have found out. “You and Audrey are the only ones who know.”
“Whatever you need, you can count on us,” Cole said.
Con trained his eyes on the men in front of him. “I need you to make sure I don’t hurt anybody if I lose it. You have to put me down if need be.”
“You don’t need us for that. You already have your woman,” Max pointed out.
The thick atmosphere made him thankful for the reprieve of humor, never mind how brief.
“I’m serious,” Con insisted. “I’m not a completely loose cannon, at least not yet, but when I’m triggered, I get panic attacks and have problems grounding myself in reality. I need to know you have my back.”
“We do,” Mike stated. The rest assented. “Always. But we aren’t putting you down. We’ll knock you down and keep you down until we can get your sorry ass to a doc.”
“Fair enough.”
“You getting help?” Cole asked.
“Yeah, I’m seeing a shrink at the VA hospital.” He’d tried it all. The psychotherapy sessions, the pills, the group therapy. Nothing had helped as much as letting Audrey near him had. He was calmer. His appetite was back. He was sleeping better. Never more than three hours straight, but baby steps, right?
He put on a clean shirt and grabbed his bag. “We better let the people in.”
“Fuck the people,” Cole said.
“It’s okay. I’ll shower at home. I’d prefer it.”
His friends nodded.
As Con was about to open the door, Mike asked, “Did you waste the motherfuckers who did this?”
Con nodded. “I got one. My unit got the rest.”
“Good,” Cole growled.
When Con left the locker room, Audrey was waiting for him. Aside from Rachel, he’d never met a woman who took showers faster. She didn’t dry her hair or put on makeup or mess with any frills. She didn’t need to. She was gorgeous.
She grabbed his hand. “Let’s go, soldier.”
He stilled for a second and then followed her. “Aren’t we supposed to keep our distance?”
“Please. You’re the one who slapped my ass first.” She lowered her voice. “And got me going by fondling me on the mat.”
“We were training,” he tried.
“Yeah, yeah. Tell that to that huge erection of yours.”
So true.
They’d just started seeing each other, but his no-sex policy was already biting him in the ass.
Chapter Seven
Audrey sneaked into the back yard at three o’clock in the morning. She was dead on her feet from running the inn, working on the cottage in her spare time, and training in the evening, but she wouldn’t have missed this opportunity for the world.
She scouted the yard until she spotted Con pruning the roses. She thought about surprising him, but then decided against it. She wasn’t afraid of him, but he was terrified of himself, and she didn’t want to give him any reason to back out on their deal.
“Hi,” she called out, a second before she reached him and hugged him from behind, burying her face in his back, breathing him in. She loved how he smelled like earth and summer. “Sooo glad my house elf is back!”
His body shook with laughter as he turned around, wrapping her in his warm embrace. She went on tiptoe and kissed him softly on the lips. He never kissed her first, but he always reciprocated, and this time wasn’t an exception.
Far too soon, he broke their kiss. “What are you doing here? You need your sleep.”
“Look who’s talking,” she answered with a soft snort. “You’re the one who shouldn’t be here.”
He shrugged, looking relaxed. “Once a house elf, always a house elf.”
Apparently. “Is this house elf done for the night?”
He glanced around. “I can be. Why?”
“Let’s spend some time together,” she decreed, turning off the water and dropping the hose.
He let her drag him to their spot on the grass and they lay side by side, as they’d done so often before.
“Say, are you hiding me?” she asked turning her head to him. “We only see each other at night or at the gym. I think I deserve a public date.”
“Hiding you?” he repeated, chuckling. “Please. You grabbed my hand after sparring, and we made out like fucking teenagers in the car when I was dropping you off. Everybody must know by now.”
Maybe. “Making out in the car wasn’t exactly my fault. I just kissed you.” It would have gone much further if Con hadn’t kept his hand on top of her seat-belt buckle, making it impossible for her to climb into his lap. Which she would have done. In a heartbeat.
He cupped her face. “I’m discovering you’re very sneaky.”
“That I am. Extremely.” She rolled onto her side and placed her hand on his chest. She noticed his body stiffening, but she ignored it.
He covered her hand with his, trapping it. “Kissing is all you have to do to get me going. Fuck, looking at me like you do is enough. Yesterday I kept you back out of self-preservation. And I wanted to spare you—after hours at the gym, I must have reeked.”
“Nah. You smelled like sweat and man. Very sexy. If you hadn’t kept me prisoner with the seat belt, I would have proved it to you.”
“Right,” he said with a sidelong smile. “In front of people coming and going from the inn.”
> “Well, we don’t offer pay-per-view adult movies. Maybe I could have made up for it.”
He broke into laughter. “You’re impossible.” Then he went somber again. “Listen, I want you to be totally straight with me.”
“Shoot.”
He was studying her face intently. “Are you sure you’re okay with my chest and back?”
She patted his chest. “I told you I’m okay with that. It’s the lack of cock that’s bugging the living shit out of me.” She sighed exaggeratedly. “But I’m a lady. I’ll wait until you’re ready.”
“Thanks,” he said between chuckles.
They lay in silence for a while, relishing each other’s company and closeness. He was humming, relaxed, and Audrey felt ten feet tall.
“You’re going to get cold lying here,” he said after some time. “You should go back to bed.”
“You could come with me. You’ll get cold too, and my bed is big enough,” she suggested.
He glanced at the sky and let out a snort. “Right. Like lying in bed with you would be conductive to sleep.”
She shrugged. “As I’ve suggested several times—maybe too subtly if the results are anything to go by—we could always redefine your no-sex policy. There are no lines carved in stone. I checked online. You wouldn’t believe all the naughty stuff that technically is not considered sex. Interested?”
She loved feeling his deep laugh reverberating through her body. “You know I’m interested, but if the sex weren’t risky enough, I might fall asleep in your bed.”
“God, the horror.” She feigned a gasp.
He squeezed her hand. “Listen, babe. I haven’t gone into detail about this with you, but aside from difficulties with sleeping, I have… nightmares. Paralyzing ones. They’re so damn real, sometimes it takes me a while to snap out of them and realize I’m not in danger anymore. Sleeping with me isn’t safe,” he finished in a whisper, his expression apologetic.
It killed her that he looked so sad. There was nothing he should feel apologetic for. If anything, it was the other way around: he should be angry about what had happened to him. The pain. The loss. The night he’d told her about it, she’d held out as best as she could, but when she was back in her room, she’d cried herself to sleep. She still found herself blinking back tears often. Like now.
She swallowed her grief and smiled, going for playful. “I’m great at sex. I guarantee you, by the time I’m done with you, you’ll sleep like the dead. Mata Hari’s got nothing on me.”
She felt relieved when he broke into laughter again. That was what he needed now. The release of tension, not bottling it up or worrying about anyone’s tender sensibilities. Especially not hers.
“You’re impossible.” After a pause, he continued, “You know, the other day at the gym, I showed the boys. Cole and Max and Mike. They know now.”
She stilled. “And? How do you feel about it?”
He didn’t have to think much about his answer. “I feel lighter.”
“I’m glad, baby,” she whispered, tapping his chest as firmly as his grip allowed.
He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed it. “So am I.”
“Are you going to tell your family? Summer’s almost here. It’s going to be difficult to keep it covered.”
“They aren’t ready. Hell, I’m not ready.”
Then it dawned on her. “Wait. Does that mean you were MIA and your family had no clue? Greta doesn’t know? What about the hospital? All the time you spent there, you were alone?” She tried to hide her outrage, but her voice probably gave her away.
He nodded curtly, and her stomach sank.
“It wouldn’t have made any difference,” he said with a shrug. “Why make a fuss?”
Oh, my God. He’d been through all that alone.
She swallowed again and went for chirpy. He seemed to be in good spirits; she didn’t want to bring him down by wailing and yelling at him. “Well, don’t you dare end up in the hospital again and not tell me. I want to play nurse.”
He laughed. “Okay, I’ll keep it in mind. No secrets from Aud.”
Again her stomach sank. She was keeping her own fair share of those.
“I’ve got to admit, a nurse like you would have been a huge improvement during all the time I spent looking at the white ceiling of my room,” he said, oblivious to her line of thought.
“Do you still go to the VA for check-ups? I mean, are you in treatment?”
He shrugged. “Kinda.” Then he snorted drily. “Although the physical scars are going nowhere. They’re here to stay. Too much damage. Not sure about the mental ones, either.”
And of course he was going through that all alone too. “If you need anyone to drive you to your appointments or just to keep you company, I can come with you,” she offered.
“Nah, you don’t need to bother.”
You don’t need to bother. Her throat clogged at those words. It took her several minutes to steady her voice and get herself under control. “It’s not a bother, silly. Besides, I’m responsible for my house elf, remember?”
He chuckled. “Yes, Master.”
She wasn’t sure if it was his humming or his caresses or the way she felt at ease with him, but she must have fallen asleep, because next thing she knew, she was waking up in her own bed. Alone. And it was past noon. Holy shit.
She got herself dressed and hurried to the reception desk. Shantel smiled at her while checking in a couple. Suzy was bringing drinks to the terrace, so Audrey went to the kitchen, where Red was baking.
Audrey sagged on the counter. Everything was in order. “Fuck, Red. I overslept. Why didn’t you wake me up?”
“I was told you needed the sleep,” Red said, giving her the evil eye. “And we have it under control.”
“Who—”
“I happened to bump into Connor walking out of your room at dawn. He asked me not to wake you up unless there was an emergency.”
So he’d brought her in. She tried to explain that Red was misunderstanding the whole situation, but she couldn’t get a word in edgewise.
“I won’t speculate on what made you so tired. I don’t have to. One thing I’ll say, girl. You guys were quiet. Not a peep, not a moan, not a headboard banging against the wall. I’m dumbfounded. If I’d had that hunk in my bed, I’d have screamed the whole house down.”
Audrey probably would have too—if she’d been awake and fucking him, that is.
Giving up on convincing Red, Audrey went back to her room to change into a different kind of work clothes and headed to the cottage. She was supposed to sand and paint the doors. Besides, Red and the others were managing fine with the guests; they didn’t need her. Con had an appointment in Boston, but he was going to stop by once he made it back to Alden. Afterward, they would go to the gym together. She was fresh out of excuses.
She was finishing the sanding when she heard someone knocking at the front door. Taking off her mask, she turned around. It was Rachel.
“Hi,” Rachel said. “Red told me you were here.”
“Hi. Come in. What brings you here? Is everything okay?”
Nodding, Rachel entered. Behind her came Greta, Wilma, Rebecca, and Kyra.
“Oh, hi, everyone.” Audrey looked around the living room, grimacing. “I’d offer you a seat, but I’m afraid this is a mess.”
“No need, darling,” Greta said, waving her off. “We aren’t staying.”
“And neither are you,” Wilma added.
“We came to pick you up. Girls’ afternoon out,” Kyra informed her. The OGs concurred.
“Oh, that would be great, but I’m supposed to wait for Con. We’re going to the gym later on, after I paint these doors. I can’t bail on him.”
“Don’t worry,” Rachel said, grabbing her cell phone from her pocket. She typed something and paused. “There, message sent. Your afternoon has been freed. He knows you’re hanging out with us. He’s cool.”
“O-kay.” Audrey looked at herself. “If you give m
e a sec, I’ll change my clothes.” She had on worn-out jeans and a tight T-shirt. She hadn’t started painting, so she was relatively clean, if a bit dusty, but in no way was she dressed for an afternoon out.
“Young people look beautiful in whatever. As long as you’re wearing sneakers, you’re set,” Rebecca said.
“Okay,” Audrey mumbled, dusting off her jeans and shirt. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see,” Greta said, placing a hand on her back and gently pushing her along. “Let’s go. We don’t want to be late.”
Audrey wanted to ask where they were going that they could be late, but she was already beginning to understand how these OGs rolled. It was no use asking.
After dropping by reception and the kitchen to inform her employees she was off, they jumped into two cars. The OGs were riding in a gorgeous red pickup from the fifties. Rachel, Kyra, and Audrey were in Rachel’s car.
“Is that your handiwork?” Audrey asked Rachel, pointing at the pickup.
Rachel nodded, her eyes on the road. “Yes. I rebuilt that baby from scrap. Your bike is in safe hands. You’re going to love it when it’s ready.”
“She did a fantastic job on my Fiat 600,” Kyra added. “It looks like new.”
“Too bad Mike hates you driving it because it isn’t safe enough, huh?” Rachel said.
Kyra snorted. “I really have no one to blame but myself. I did marry his overbearing ass.”
“Please,” Rachel said. “You loooove that overbearing ass.”
Audrey didn’t know much about Kyra, except that she was gorgeous and the main choreographer for Amantis and toured with them in summer. Juggling a career, daughter, and husband must be a bitch, but by the looks of it, she was managing, because she and Mike always looked so damn happy when Audrey saw them.
Kyra smiled. “I do. Oh, Audrey, before I forget. Expect to get a call from Jeffrey about holding Amantis’s ‘kicking off the tour season’ party at your inn.”
“What… How…”
“Amantis always throws a party before a tour. Alexa hates impersonal, big places. She loved your inn. You’re in, right?”