Vegetable consumption does not always have to be a “meal replacement.” You can and should continue to eat if you’re hungry. If you eat vegetables and you’re still hungry, eat something else, even something unhealthy if you must. Abandon the dieting scarcity mindset. If you eat three whole carrots and a salad, and then eat a hot dog, dieting law says that you’ve failed. In reality, that is a huge success! If you hadn’t eaten carrots and the salad, you might have eaten two or three hot dogs. But even if vegetables miraculously defied the laws of physics and didn’t satisfy your appetite even a little bit, despite taking up space in your stomach and providing energy, they’d still be worth consuming for their many other health and weight loss benefits.
This is a vital perspective: Healthy foods might not be a 1:1 replacement for unhealthy foods in the early stages of your change. Eating a small salad might only satisfy 35% of your appetite, and of course you’ll feel deprived if you think, “Darn. That salad was my meal but I’m still hungry. That pizza would have filled me up. I guess I must suffer to live healthy.” No, no, no! That’s so wrong that I hated typing it. You know what’s better than three greasy slices of pizza? Three greasy slices of pizza plus a salad. If you’re worried about the extra calories from the salad, well, just think about that.
When you eat something healthy, try not to have expectations for how it will affect your appetite. Don’t make a light salad have to live up to the caloric satisfaction of a cheese steak sub. I call my salads “mega” for a reason! If you eat something healthy and you’re still hungry, you can eat more of it or eat something else. That’s all. Leave appetite regulation up to your body. Eat when hungry and stop when you’re satisfied.
Is cheese fattening?
I don’t believe that. Real cheese is a healthy food packed with nutrients. When you eat nacho cheese at a movie theater, that’s not actually cheese. It might have cheese in it, but it has a lot more in it as well. When it comes to homemade nachos, the chips are far more fattening than the cheese (if it’s real).
Cheese is basically in the same camp as milk, which we’ve discussed. It’s not going to win “weight loss food of the year” awards, but it’s not quite as bad as it’s perceived to be either. As with milk, full fat cheese is the right choice. All of the science says that skim milk is more fattening and unhealthier than whole milk.
If foods like avocados (82% fat) and blueberries (high sugar) are not only helpful for weight loss, but two of the world’s best weight loss foods, and studies suggest they are, it shows we need to stop caring so much about macronutrients and more about the quality of the entire food. The consistent finding in research is that processed foods make us fat—not high-fat foods, not high-sugar foods, processed foods.
In most cases, ultra-processed foods are stripped of life, low in fiber, low in satiety, low in bioavailable micronutrients, inflammatory, and high in calories, fat, and sugar. You can pinpoint any one of these areas and say, “That’s it! We get fat because of low fiber foods!” But all of those roads lead us to the door of Frankenfoods. Foods designed in a lab are experiments, and, like any experiment, they can go poorly. While we don’t get immediately sick from eating these foods, they confuse our bodies, starve us of nutrition, and make us fatter and disease-prone. Experiment failed. Let’s go back to eating real food for our primary sustenance.
Should I buy organic?
It depends. I think it’s funny how people take pro-organic and anti-organic stances on this issue, because whether or not to buy organic should be done on a case-by-case basis. I never buy avocados organic but I always buy berries organic. Why do you think that is?
The Environmental Working Group (in Washington, DC) tests produce for pesticide residue (pesticides are not used on organic produce). The top 15 most pesticide-laden foods for 2016 were (in order of most pesticides to least): strawberries, apples, nectarines, peaches, celery, grapes, cherries, spinach, tomatoes, sweet bell peppers, cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, snap peas, blueberries, and potatoes. These are the foods to buy organic to limit your pesticide consumption. The 10 foods least important to buy organic (because they tested for the least amounts of pesticides) are: avocado, sweet corn, pineapple, cabbage, sweet peas, onions, asparagus, mangoes, papaya, kiwi, and eggplant. The full list is on their website.
Now, organic produce might contain more nutrition because of the way it’s grown. For example, a study on milk found that “organic milk contained 25% less ω-6 fatty acids and 62% more ω-3 fatty acids than conventional milk.”164 That is a vastly superior ratio of fatty acids. But given the cost of organic and varying budgets, it’s important to know where to begin. Produce is the most important area to buy organic, but not necessarily all produce. If your food budget is tight and you’re buying organic avocados, well, you shouldn’t!
What about GMOs? Genetic modification is another way humans have tampered with food. I’m not going to get into it much, but I try to avoid them when possible, which is most easily done by buying organic food. GMOs are a hotly debated issue, but when you’re eating fast food every day, GMOs are the least of your concerns (actually, maybe they are a concern, since fast food is loaded with them). If you make healthy dietary changes, you’ll automatically eat fewer GMOs, which is to say that GMOs are not the right focal point unless your diet is already healthier than 95% of the population.
Bonus Challenges
In this book, I’m introducing a new concept I call “mini challenges.” They are like a mini habit in size, but they are optional and situational. These mini challenges are never required, and are not a part of your core mini habit plan. They are opportunities to make bonus progress.
Most dieting and weight loss programs are blinded by the thought of what would happen if adherence were perfect; they overload participants with rules and restrictions. But for a strategy to succeed, its mandatory requirements (i.e. rules) must be handled with great care to preserve autonomy and prevent burnout. Optional activities, however, can be practically unlimited without a negative impact, because any instance of not doing them will not harm your self-confidence or winning streak.
Do you see how exciting this is? Imagine a typical day. Rather than feeling overwhelmed by the gap between who you are and who you want to become, you’ll have an easy list of daily mini habits to do, and additionally, you’ll have a bigger list of small but impactful behavioral challenges to do if and when you desire. These aren’t obligations, they are opportunities. Obligations are a burden, but opportunities are weightless and enticing.
These optional challenges (and your mini habits) will let you experience healthy living in a safe environment. Anyone who has dieted has experienced healthy living in a controlling, suffer-for-results environment. This is, unfortunately, the most common perspective of “healthy living.” It’s weighed down by shame, reminders of past failures to adhere to diets, and other emotional baggage. Healthy living has never been the “fun uncle,” but it can be fun if you experience it on your terms without its undeserved associations. Remove all of your preconceived notions, start experimenting, and you’ll be surprised at how enjoyable this journey can be.
The common idea behind these mini challenges is this: Being active is worthwhile in any dose.
TV Challenge: Before watching TV, exercise or move for 20 seconds (jumping jacks, push-ups, jogging in place, dancing like a jester, etc.). Need a reminder? Attach one to your TV or remote. You can use a small mark or sticker, since you’ll know what it stands for. If you think 20 seconds isn’t worthwhile, I challenge you to test that theory right now. Get groovin’ full speed for 20 seconds and see how you feel.
While 20 seconds is short, it will seem longer while you’re in motion! Afterwards, your pounding heart will tell you exactly how “worthless” that 20 seconds was. I think 20 seconds is a good amount of time for this mini challenge, because the end is already in sight before you begin, and yet it’s not over immediately once you start, which creates a nice mix of low resistance to action and a satisf
ying payoff. Low resistance and a satisfying payoff are a powerful formula for any behavior to stick (this formula is how bad habits thrive).
TV Challenge Bonus: For every 30 minutes of TV, get up and move for another 20 seconds. I recommend dancing to scare your family members. If you are watching TV with your family, and you randomly get up and start dancing without telling them why you’re doing it, you are my friend for life.
TV Commercial Challenge: Every commercial you watch during TV, get up and move around. You don’t even need to “exercise” per se, just get up and move around. Commercials are terrible anyway. Walk laps around the interior of your house. Clean part of your house. This will keep your metabolism from plummeting during a TV session, and it’s a nice way to be entertained while doing something positive for your body! When your show comes back on, you’ll feel great for “earning” more leisure time. It’s small and sounds silly, but please try it before you discount it. It feels great.
It’s not good to “earn” unhealthy food with healthy living, but it is VERY good to “earn” relaxation and entertainment for healthy living. Relaxation and entertainment aren’t harmful; they are an essential part of healthy living and the natural reward for hard work. People often feel ashamed for watching too much TV, but that’s because they do it inactively and in big chunks. If you add activity to your leisure time, you win on multiple levels because of the synergies. You’ll enjoy your entertainment more because you won’t be distracted by feeling “lazy shame.”
Stairs Challenge: Whenever possible, take the stairs! Take pride in skipping the elevator and escalator. I am the only person in my apartment complex who lives on the 7th floor and takes the stairs. For different results, you must live and think differently than others. This is one opportunity to do so.
Be careful not to think in all-or-nothing terms. If your destination is the 18th floor, you can take three flights of stairs and then take the elevator. Or take the elevator and jog in place as you ascend (especially do this if there are others in the elevator with you). If there are several flights of escalators and stairs, take the stairs first and the escalator next. There are no rules. Nobody is going to say, “Hey! She just took the stairs and then switched to the escalator! How inconsistent! That’s weird!”
Parking Spot Challenge: Park in the furthest spot from the store. The walk isn’t that much farther, and you won’t be hunting for “the best spot” for five minutes too long like everyone else. Here’s a secret: The best parking spot is the farthest from the store, because it gives you the best walk, the most enjoyment of the weather, the least stress, and the most rewarding feeling.
Walking/Biking Challenge: If you can walk/bike somewhere instead of drive, go for it. I am often surprised at how enjoyable it can be to walk places.
9
Situational Strategies
Rules Can Be Broken. Strategies Are Forever.
"Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth."
~ Mike Tyson
Strategies Overview
Dieters abide by their list of good and forbidden foods until life happens, and it turns out that it happens often. Such rules can be broken, but strategies last forever.
The following strategies are not rules to follow. These are in-the-moment mindsets and actions you can choose to use at any time. It’s up to you if and when you’d like to use them. All of these strategies are conducive to influencing you and your decisions in the right direction. Since you don’t have to use them, there’s no feeling of “messing up” if you eat a popsicle on a whim.
The core mini habit plans we discussed in the previous chapter are the “main course.” These are optional, but highly encouraged “side dishes.” This reflects the nature of healthy living, which is mostly dictated by habit, and secondarily dictated by our perspective and the non-habitual choices we make every day.
Since real-world application is more important than theory, what follows is a list of several challenging real-world situations you’ll find yourself in, with custom strategies to help you make winning choices more often.
Temptation Strategy: Mini Routines
You have a plan in place. It’s fantastic. But then you’re hit with a strong desire to sink your teeth into seven cookies … uh oh! What can you do? The worst thing you can do is resist the craving directly and deprive yourself.
A craving is a rare opportunity for progress. Do you know why? There’s significant motivation behind your craving, and we can harness it! Motivation is the very thing billions of people want when it comes to their goals. Here we have it, and it’s powerful, but it’s motivation to eat a cookie, which isn’t in line with our goals. How can we use this to our advantage?
I’ve used the tactic I’m about to tell you about to dramatic positive effect. One of my less impressive habits is bingeing on video games. I’ve played for double digit-hour sessions many times. (I told you I’m lazy.) Often, when I feel the urge to play, I will think about previous binges and tell myself I shouldn’t play or I shouldn’t play too much (does this sound like you with food?). These thoughts are shame-driven and make us feel deprived, which makes things worse.
I’ve found a better strategy than shame. Let’s say that my overarching goal is to play games less and be more productive. To accomplish this when I’m tempted, I will place a small, non-intimidating, and beneficial obstacle between myself and my game. And I do it on the condition that I can play the game without shame. A no-shame game, if you will. On multiple occasions, this has led me to productive work sessions lasting several hours without playing any games. Other times, I’ve worked some and played some, coming out satisfied with each. Regardless of what happens when I do this, I win. Now, let’s talk about what this strategy can do for you when unhealthy food temptation strikes. Aside from the core mini habit strategy, this may be the most exciting strategy in the book.
How to Be an Opportunistic Craver instead of a Victim
What’s the typical behavior of a craver? They resist until they cave to the crave. They fight, exhaust themselves, lose, and eat the treat. It’s as if they’re victims of a craving attack. Then, they feel bad about losing the battle. What if these “victims” could not merely defend themselves from these craving attacks, but go on the attack themselves? We’re going to completely change this game, and you will never look at your cravings in the same way again.
We’ll start by asking you a piercing question. What’s more harmful to your long-term weight loss goals: eating an unhealthy snack or feeling ashamed about eating an unhealthy snack? Which one do you think causes more weight gain over time? Put that thought on the back burner as we talk about cravings.
Think of your craving as a magnetic force, causing you to steadily move toward it. You can resist it for some time, but the moment you let your guard down, you’ll rush in. Our strategy is to harness this force by putting some choice miniature obstacles between you and the craving. Not instead of the craving. Between you and the craving. But before we get into the mini obstacles, we must get our perspective right.
By completing these mini obstacles, you are indeed getting closer to your cookie (or whatever it may be). However, and this is extremely important, you are NOT “earning it.” You are not doing these things in order to “buy” the right to eat something unhealthy. The concept of “buying” unhealthy food with healthy behaviors suggests that they cancel each other out, that they’re worth the same, that a little bit of good makes up for a little bit of sin, and other similarly false beliefs. You are not buying the cookie, you’re buying a “get out of shame free” card. If you complete your mini obstacles, you will agree to feel no shame about eating the item. (If you still feel shame, you ought to be ashamed of yourself! Actually, no, that wouldn’t be good. You get the point. If you begin to feel shame, simply remind yourself of your deal.) If you complete this task, agree with yourself that you can eat your object of craving without shame.
If you’re wondering why you would ever choose to comp
lete these mini obstacles when you could just go for the treat directly, I like how you think. Question everything. This strategy is so good that you will gladly choose the package with mini obstacles on many occasions. And why? Because unlike the “straight to the cookie option,” the mini obstacle package comes without any shame AND you still get your food. It’s the same reason why I enjoy working before playing video games—whether or not I play after working, I feel good about my decision to do something positive and don’t feel bad about playing video games.
Mini Habits for Weight Loss: Stop Dieting. Form New Habits. Change Your Lifestyle Without Suffering. Page 22