by Lisa Carter
Through the window, she watched as light flooded the eastern sky. And with poignant insight, she realized she’d been so stubborn. So blind to the incredible beauty of the gifts God had placed within her reach. The supreme gift of Himself.
Joy and hope. The pain of yesterday forgotten as if it had never been. As for Ryan? Her heart swelled. Was it too late? Why had he left?
She couldn’t shake that one moment last night when Ruby no longer lay between them, but united them. In faith. In love. In purpose.
In the winter-bare branches of the maples outside the window, birds sang a melody of glorious praise. “Please don’t let it be too late, God,” she whispered.
She swiped her eyes with her hand. She could no longer deny the truth. From the beginning, Ryan believed in her. Without hope of her ever loving him back.
Ryan could be trusted to love her. Ryan could be trusted to love another man’s biological child. Because first and foremost, Ryan had proven how much he loved his God.
Last night in Ryan’s eyes, she beheld his heart. And in his heroic, sacrificial love, she’d found an unwavering tower of earthly strength. Safety. A place of rest.
Her Bethlehem.
* * *
When Ryan walked out, he found himself adrift. Nowhere to go. The village remained dark.
His boots crunched over the snow on the green. The storm had blown itself out to sea. The skies were clear.
Inside the darkened sanctuary of the never-locked church, he slipped into the front pew. Moonlight shone through the stained glass windows, bathing him in pools of purple, blue and red. He perched on the edge of the seat. His elbows on his knees. His hands knotted together.
The waxy scent of candles from the candlelight service permeated the air. Only a few hours ago, he’d sat here, celebrating the coming birth of a Savior with family and friends.
It felt more distant, not only in terms of space and time, but in emotional mileage, too. In what for him had become an endless night.
Joy intertwined with sorrow. A night from which he couldn’t seem to awaken.
Footfalls sounded on the carpeted aisle.
“Bro?” A solid form dropped beside him on the pew. “Will came back to the station. Told us about the baby. Nobody knew where you’d gone.”
He wouldn’t have guessed that, of his brothers, Ethan would be the one to go looking for him.
“I’m so sorry, Ryan.” Ethan’s voice thickened. “I know how much you loved her. Loved them both.”
Loved. Past tense. If only that were true.
“I appreciate you checking on me, Eth, but I want to be alone.”
“Here’s the thing, I don’t think you should be alone. Not tonight.” He laid his hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “Or at least what’s left of it.”
What was left for Ryan? Nothing. So much for his emotional barricades. Because as it turned out, his was the real at-risk heart.
Ethan’s grip tightened. “You’re not alone, man. Never.” His too-quiet, emotionally locked-up brother who hadn’t been the same since he returned from Afghanistan.
Through the long night, his brother kept vigil beside him. And sometime during the night, Ryan made his decision. No more playing it safe.
Head down, he clenched his eyes shut. Shoulders hunched. His heart no longer lay in a research lab. His heart and his future lay with kids like Oscar, Maria and Zander. Even if that future didn’t include Anna.
When morning broke, he hauled himself to his feet. “Thanks, man.” His voice gruff. “For being here, Eth.”
“No problem.” Ethan shoulder-butted him. “But just so you know, I’m not cleaning up the horse poop Franklin left in the firehouse. That’s on you.”
Ryan pushed his glasses along the bridge of his nose and smiled. “Got it.”
Ethan lumbered to his feet. “There’s a gas-powered range at the station. Luke promised a batch of pancakes.” He ran his hand over the blond stubble covering his jaw. “It ain’t much. Definitely not the Christmas breakfast we hoped for—”
“But while it’s Christmas and we’re here,” Ryan finished for him, “we might as well eat.”
Ethan’s mouth curved. “Something like that.”
Outside, Kiptohanock lay in a pristine, snow-covered mantle of purity. Undisturbed. Tranquil.
The idea of warm pancakes caused his stomach to growl. But first, he had to make sure one last time that all was well with those he loved most in the world.
“I’ll be there soon,” he promised as they parted on the steps.
Ethan’s brow creased.
“It’s okay. Save me a place at the table.”
His brother turned toward the station. And Ryan headed in the opposite direction. Slogging his way through the deserted streets.
The village was beginning to stir. There were signs of life as homeowners surveyed the damage from the ice storm. Outside the Coast Guard station, the metal rods of the two flags—American and Coastie—clanged against the flagpole. The flags stretched taut in the stiff sea breeze coming off the harbor.
From a habit nurtured within every ’born here, his gaze flitted toward the barrier islands. Like a string of translucent pearls beneath the bluing of the sky. He gauged the sky and the wind. A calm sea. A good day.
The electric lines hummed. The star on top of the gazebo surged to life. With power restored, faint cheers echoed from the open bay of the firehouse. He rounded the square to Anna’s family home.
It might take a while to connect Kiptohanock with the rest of the world again. But life would go on. As it must. As it was always meant to.
He paused in front of the Pruitt house. He meant only to go as far as the porch. Take a quick look and be on his way. He didn’t want to intrude. It wasn’t his way to force himself where he wasn’t wanted. Or needed.
But the steps squeaked as he crept toward the bay window. Inside, the multicolored lights of the Christmas tree glowed. Glittering foil-wrapped presents lay underneath the tree. And on the sofa, Anna held the sleeping child in her arms.
His Adam’s apple bobbed. She swaddled her daughter in the soft blanket old Mrs. Evans had made for Kiptohanock’s Christmas baby.
Ryan must’ve made an inadvertent movement. Anna’s head snapped up, her eyes meeting his outside the window. Her lips parted. He froze, locked in place. Lost in her brown eyes.
She mouthed something to him. The baby stirred. Anna motioned him toward the door.
Freed from his paralysis, he entered the foyer and toed out of his boots. He padded into the living room.
“I’d kiss you right now—” her lips quivered “—except I can’t reach you.”
He glanced up, finding himself standing underneath the sprig of glossy green mistletoe.
Anna rose from the couch and winced.
He rushed forward. “You shouldn’t be on your feet.”
“Please don’t leave.” Easing onto the sofa, she patted the cushion beside her. “Sit with me, Ryan.”
Sounds filtered from upstairs.
“Charlie got home a few hours ago. He carried the baby and me downstairs.” She chewed her lip. “When are you leaving for North Carolina?”
He lifted his chin. “I decided not to take the job in North Carolina. I’m going to accept the job with the intervention program and stay in Kiptohanock.”
“Ryan...” She held out her hand. “Please come and talk to me.”
Never able to refuse Anna anything, he took a slow step toward her.
“I discovered something last night after you left, Ryan.”
He took another step closer. “What’s that, Anna?”
“It is darkest before the dawn.”
His heart had to be pounding out of his chest. Surely Ruby would hear it and awaken. “What do you
mean?”
“I was terrified I’d never see you again. That I’d lost you for good.”
He sat down. “I will always be your friend.”
“My first and best friend.” She leaned closer. “But my heart yearns for more.” She dropped her eyes. “I didn’t mean those things I said to you yesterday before the storm.”
What was she saying? Could she possibly mean what he hoped? But if any possibility existed that one day she would return his love, he’d wait for Anna forever.
“I’ll be here for you.” His voice sounded as ragged as his heart felt. “As long as you need me.”
She blinked, her eyelashes spiky with tears. “That’s just it, Ryan. I don’t need you.” Her gaze cut to the lights on the tree.
Pain knifed through Ryan. He drew back, but she captured his hand.
“I don’t need you, but I desperately want you in my life and Ruby’s.”
He couldn’t tear his eyes from her face.
“I love you, Ryan.” She made a sound, a half sob. “Totally. Completely. Helplessly.”
“But you said...” Insecurity gnawed at Ryan. “What about your husband?”
“I wasn’t being truthful to you or myself. I didn’t want you to give up your dream because of me. The past was just an excuse because I was afraid if I admitted I loved you, I’d get hurt again.”
Like a dormant seed buried deep in the cold earth of winter, hope surged to the surface of his heart. “You love me?”
“Could you find it in your heart to give me another chance to show you how much...?” Tears ran down her cheeks. “How very much I love you.”
He caught one tear on the tip of his finger, where it glistened like morning dew.
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” she said. “Wherever your dreams take you. I know how much you want to return to your research.”
He swallowed. “Dreams have a way of changing when there’s something you want more. My dream has become working with the at-risk children. Being part of your baby’s life.”
“Ruby’s not just mine.” Anna handed the sleeping child into his open arms. “You are her father in the truest sense of the word.”
Nestling Ruby in the crook of his arm, he lifted a strand of hair off Anna’s cheek. Fingering its silky texture.
“Ryan...” she breathed. “Say something. Tell me I haven’t ruined this precious, beautiful thing God has done for us.”
His palm cupped her cheek. Her skin warmed his hand. Sending electrical sparks straight to his heart.
The love he hardly dared to believe shone from her deep brown eyes. Love for him. A love he scarcely could believe she offered him.
“I love you so much, Anna.”
Was this where I fit into Your plan all along, God?
He moved his hand behind the nape of her neck. Tenderly, softly, his lips met Anna’s. The baby stirred but settled with a contented sigh. His baby. His Anna. His most precious love.
God was good. A happily-ever-after more wonderful than he could’ve dared dream. Anna loving him. This baby in his arms wrapped in a Christmas joy that he’d forever hold in his heart.
“Will you promise to grow old with me, Anna?” he whispered.
“As long as the Lord allows.” Her eyes were dewy. “The best is still yet to be, my darling.” She clung to him. Holding him close. Holding their love close.
Ryan would get to be a fundamental part of who Ruby Reyes would become. Her first words. First steps. Birthdays. Other Christmases.
He rested his forehead against Anna. “Of course, this means certain prerequisites must be taken care of.”
A smile teased the corners of her mouth. “Would this involve Reverend Parks?”
“Your brothers, too. The whole town of Kiptohanock. Whatever you want.”
A wistful look crossed her face. “My dad would love to give me away this time.”
Ryan held his two great loves close to his heart. “Whenever you’re ready. A church wedding.”
She tilted her head. “How would you feel about a romantic wedding in the gazebo?”
Ryan nodded. “We can wait for the weather to warm come spring.”
Her eyes flickered. “On second thought, I don’t think I want to wait that long.”
“Can’t be soon enough for me.” His voice went husky. “How about we pray for a balmy Valentine’s Day?”
A smile flitted across her lips. “I like how you think, Mr. Savage.” She cocked her head toward the window. “Did you hear that?”
He caught the melodious strain ringing from the steeple on this crisp December morning. “Bells.”
Ruby lay across both their laps.
Anna gave him a tremulous smile. “Christmas bells.”
It seemed fitting to Ryan that their love story should unfold on the day of their Savior’s birth. God’s love story for all mankind.
She stroked the dark hair on her daughter’s head. “Ruby and I are home in Kiptohanock with our family. But most of all, my dearest love, we’re home with you.”
Chimes rang out across the village. A herald resounding through the ages. A never-ending proclamation of peace on earth.
His beloved Christmas baby stretched, her little heel coming out from the blanket. Her big, brown eyes opened and fastened onto his face. Cradling his child, he dreamed of glorious days to come.
And gave thanks for the day Love made Ryan’s heart His home.
* * * * *
If you loved this tale of sweet romance,
pick up these other stories
from author Lisa Carter:
COAST GUARD COURTSHIP
COAST GUARD SWEETHEART
FALLING FOR THE SINGLE DAD
THE DEPUTY’S PERFECT MATCH
THE BACHELOR’S UNEXPECTED FAMILY
Available now from Love Inspired!
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Keep reading for an excerpt from THE DEPUTY’S HOLIDAY FAMILY by Mindy Obenhaus.
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Dear Reader,
Sometimes we find love. And sometimes, like an unexpected gift, love finds us.
In writing this story, I was forced to ask myself, how far was I willing to go for love? What would I sacrifice? What would I risk?
To risk much for love, like Anna, I have to be willing to come to the end of my pride and self-sufficiency if I am to discover God’s best, often unexpected, gift for me. Like Ryan, I, too, have grappled with what this kind of love will cost me. Sometimes I lacked the courage to love this way—feeling the cost too high. The price of obedience. The cost of laying down my plans. The death of self.
But love is a choice. An unconditional love with no expectation of return demands courage. My prayer—like Ryan’s—is for God’s love to be born in me so that I might love the way God loves us. And to persevere in loving, despite knowing the outcome may never be what I long for most—but trusting God anyway.
Bethlehem and Calvary are the greatest love story. God’s love story for all mankind when He chose to make our heart His home. Love is calling, and I pray you will answer love’s call.
I hope you have enjoyed taking this Christmas journey with me, Anna and Ryan. I would love to hear from you. You may email me at [email protected] or visit www.lisacarterauthor.com.
Wishing you fair winds and following seas,
Lisa Carter
We hope you enjoyed this Harlequin Love Inspired story.
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The Deputy’s Holiday Family
by Mindy Obenhaus
Chapter One
Coming home had never been so bittersweet.
Lacie Collier tapped her brakes at the Ouray city limit sign, observing the snowcapped mountains that closed in around her. Okay, so her trip home in February for her sister’s funeral ranked right up there, too. But this was different.
She glimpsed the brown-eyed little girl in her rearview mirror. The last nine months had been quite an adjustment period for both her and Kenzie. And while her niece seemed to finally be adapting to life without her mother, Lacie was still struggling to balance motherhood and work. Or was anyway, until her employer decided the addition of a child was too distracting and let Lacie go.
Her heart ached as she approached the hot springs pool. She’d wanted so badly to make this the best Christmas ever for Kenzie. Now they didn’t even have a home.
Still, God had a plan, of that she was certain. She just wished He’d give her some clue as to what lay ahead.
“Are we there yet?” Poor Kenzie. They’d spent the last five-plus hours driving across Colorado. A trip Lacie never relished, but throw a four-year-old into the mix and it became an even greater challenge.