by Nora Roberts
Wearing a suit only put a thin layer between then and now.
He tugged on his tie, detesting it. He didn’t think back very often. There was no need. Something about Freddie was making him switch back and forth between past and present.
The first time he saw her, she’d been about thirteen, a little china doll. Cute, sweet, harmless. And he loved her. Of course he did. In a purely familial way. The fact that she’d grown into a woman didn’t change that. He was still six years older, her more experienced cousin.
But the woman who stepped out of the elevator didn’t look like anyone’s cousin.
What the hell had she done to herself? Nick jammed his hands in his pockets and scowled at her as she crossed the lobby in a short, snug little dress the color of just-ripened apricots. She’d clipped up her hair, and it showed entirely too much of slender neck and smooth shoulders. Glittery colored gems swung from her ears, and one tear-shaped sapphire nestled comfortably between the curve of her breasts.
The kind of female trick, Nick knew, that drew a man’s eyes to that tempting point and made his fingers itch.
Not that his did, he assured himself, and kept them safely in his pockets.
Her dimples flashed as she spotted him, and he concentrated on them, rather than on her legs as she walked to him.
“Hi. I hope you haven’t been waiting long.” She rose on her toes to kiss him at the left corner of his mouth. “You look wonderful.”
“I don’t see why we had to get all dressed up to eat.”
“So I could wear the outfit I bought today.” She turned a saucy circle, laughing. “Like it?”
He was lucky his tongue wasn’t hanging out. “It’s fine. What there is of it. You’re going to get cold.”
To her credit, she didn’t snarl at the brotherly opinion of her appearance. “I don’t think so. The car’s waiting just outside.” She took his hand, linking fingers with him as they walked out of the lobby toward the sleek black limo at the curb.
“You got a limo? To go to dinner?”
“I felt like indulging myself.” With the ease of long practice, she flashed a smile at the driver before sliding smoothly into the car. “You’re my first date in New York.”
It was said casually, as if she expected to have many more dates, with many more men. Nick only grunted as he climbed in after her.
“I’ll never understand rich people.”
“You’re not exactly on poverty row these days, Nick,” she reminded him. “A Broadway hit going into its second year, a Tony nomination, another musical to be scored.”
He moved his shoulders, still uncomfortable with the idea of true monetary success. “I don’t hang around in limos.”
“So enjoy.” She settled back, feeling a great deal like Cinderella on her way to the ball. The big difference was, she was going there with her Prince Charming. “Big Sunday dinner at Grandma’s coming up,” she said.
“Yeah, I got the word on it.”
“I can’t wait to see them, and all the kids. I dropped by Uncle Mik’s gallery this morning. Have you seen the piece he did on Aunt Sydney and the children?”
“Yeah.” Nick’s eyes softened. He almost forgot he was wearing a suit and riding in a limo. “It’s beautiful. The baby’s terrific. She’s got this way of climbing up your leg and into your lap. Bess is having another one, you know.”
“So she told me at lunch. There’s no stopping those Ukrainians. Papa’s going to have to start buying those gumdrops he likes to pass out by the gross.”
“You don’t worry about teeth,” Nick said in Yuri’s thick accent. “All my grandbabies have teeth like iron.”
Freddie laughed, shifting so that her knee brushed his. “They have a wedding anniversary coming up.”
“Next month, right.”
“We were kicking around ideas for a party at lunch. We thought about hiring a hall, or a hotel ballroom, but we all thought it would be more fun, and more true to them, if we kept it simpler. Would you and Zack hold it in the bar?”
“Sure, that’s no problem. Hell of a lot more fun there than at some ritzy ballroom.” And he wouldn’t have to wear a damned suit. “Rio can handle the food.”
“You and I can handle the music.”
He shot her a cautious look. “Yeah, we could do that.”
“And we thought we could do a group present. Did you know Grandma’s always wanted to go to Paris?”
“Nadia, Paris?” He smiled at the thought. “No. How do you know?”
“It was something she said to Mama, not too long ago. She didn’t say too much—you know she wouldn’t. Just how she’d always wondered if it was as romantic as all the songs claimed. Oh, and a couple of other things. So we were thinking, if we could give them a trip, fly them over there for a couple of weeks, get them a suite at the Ritz or something.”
“It’s a great idea. Yuri and Nadia do Paris.” He was still grinning over it when the limo glided to the curb.
“Where have you always wanted to go?”
“Hmm?” Nick climbed out, automatically offering a hand to assist her. “Oh, I don’t know. The best place I’ve ever been is New Orleans. Incredible music. You can stand on any street corner and be blown away by it. The Caribbean’s not bad either. Remember when Zack and Rachel and I sailed down there? God, that was before any of the kids came along.”
“You sent me a postcard from Saint Martin,” she murmured. She still had it.
“It was the first time I’d been anywhere. Zack decided that as a crew member my best contribution was as ballast, so I ended up doing mostly kitchen duty. I bitched all the way and loved every minute of it.”
They stepped inside, out of the slight spring chill and into the warmth and muted light of the restaurant. “Kimball,” Freddie told the maître d’, and found herself well satisfied when they were led to a quiet corner booth.
Very close to perfect, she thought, with candles flickering in silver holders on the white linen tablecloth, the scent of good food, the gleam of fine crystal. Nick might not realize he was being courted, but she thought she was doing an excellent job of it.
“Should we have some wine?” she asked.
“Sure.” He took the leather-bound list. His years of working a bar had taught him something about choosing the right vintage. He skimmed the list and shook his head over the ridiculous price markups. Well, it was Fred’s party.
“The Sancerre, ’88,” he told the hovering sommelier. It was a profession, Nick had always thought, that made a guy look as though he had an ashtray hanging around his neck.
“Yes, sir. Excellent choice.”
“I figure it should be, since it’s marked up about three hundred percent.” While Freddie struggled with a laugh and the sommelier struggled with his dignity, Nick passed the list back and lighted a cigarette. “So, any luck on finding an apartment?”
“I didn’t do a lot about it today, but I think Sydney will come up with something.”
“Finding one in New York isn’t a snap, kid. And you can get conned. There are plenty of people out there just waiting for a chance to gobble up fresh meat. You ought to think about moving in with one of the family for the time being.”
She arched a brow. “Want a roommate?”
He gaped at her, blinked, then blew out smoke. “That wasn’t what I meant.”
“Actually, being roomies would be handy once we start working together—”
“Hold it. You’re getting ahead of yourself.”
“Am I?” With a slight smile, she sat back as the sommelier presented the wine label for Nick’s inspection.
“Fine,” he said with an impatient wave of his hand, but there was no getting rid of the man until the ritual of the wine was completed. Nick handed the cork to Freddie. Cork smelled like cork, and he’d be damned if he’d sniff it. To speed the business up, he took a quick sip of the sample that was poured into his glass. “Great, let’s have it.”
With strained dignity, the sommelier
poured Freddie’s wine, then topped off Nick’s, before nestling the bottle into the waiting silver bucket.
“Now listen—” Nick began.
“It was an excellent choice,” Freddie mused as she savored the first sip. Dry, and nicely light. “You know, I trust your taste in certain areas, Nicholas, without reservation. This is one of them,” she said, lifting her glass. “And music’s another. You may be reluctant to admit that your little Freddie’s as good as you are, but your musical integrity won’t let you do otherwise.”
“Nobody’s saying you’re as good as I am, kid. But you’re not bad.” Giving in, just a little, he tapped his glass against hers. For a moment, he lost his train of thought. Something about the way the candlelight played in those smoky eyes. And the look in them, as if she had a secret she wasn’t quite ready to share with him. “Anyhow.” He cleared his throat, brought himself back. “I liked your stuff.”
“Oh, Mr. LeBeck.” She lowered her lashes, fluttered them. “I don’t know what to say.”
“You’ve always got plenty to say. The one number—‘It Was Ever You’? It may fit in with the score.”
“I thought it would.” She smiled at his narrowed eyes. “As the daughter of Spencer Kimball, I do have certain connections. I’ve read the book, Nick. It’s wonderful. The story manages to be beautifully old-fashioned and contemporary at the same time. It has a terrific central love story, wit, comedy. And with Maddy O’Hurley in the lead—”
“How do you know that?”
She smiled again, and couldn’t prevent it from leaning toward smug. “Connections. My father’s done quite a bit of work for her husband. Reed Valentine’s an old friend of the family.”
“Connections,” Nick muttered. “Why do you need me? You could go straight to Valentine. He’s backing the play.”
“I could.” Unconcerned with the tone of annoyance, Freddie pursed her lips and studied her wine. “But that’s not the way I want to do it.” She lifted her gaze, met his, held it. “I want you to want me, Nick. If you don’t, it wouldn’t work between us.” She waited a beat. Could he see that she wasn’t simply talking about music, but about her life, as well? Their life. “I’ll do everything I can to convince you that you do want me. Then, if you can look at me and tell me you don’t, I’ll live with it.”
Something was stirring deep in his gut. Something skittish and dangerous and unwanted. He had an urge, a shockingly strong one, to reach out and run his fingers down that smooth ivory-and-rose cheek. Instead, he took a careful breath and crushed out his cigarette.
“Okay, Fred, convince me.”
The hideous tightness around her heart loosened. “I will,” she said, “but let’s order dinner first.”
She chose her meal almost at random. Her mind was too busy formulating what she should say, and how she should say it, to worry about something as insignificant as food. She sipped her wine, watching Nick as he completed his part of the order. When he finished and looked back over at her, she was smiling.
“What?”
“I was just thinking.” Reaching over, she laid a hand over his. “About the first time I saw you. You walked into that wonderful chaos at Grandma’s and looked as if you’d been hit by a brick.”
He smiled back at her, on easy ground again. “I’d never seen anything like it. I never believed people lived that way—all that yelling and laughing, kids running around, food everywhere.”
“And Katie marched right up to you and demanded you pick her up.”
“Your little sister’s always had her eye on me.”
“So have I.”
He started to laugh, then discovered it wasn’t all that funny. “Come on.”
“Really. One look at you, and my in-the-middle-of-puberty-hell heart started beating against my ribs. Your hair was a little longer than it is now, a little lighter. You were wearing an earring.”
With a half laugh, he rubbed his earlobe. “Haven’t done that in a while.”
“I thought you were beautiful, exotic, just like the rest of them.”
Initial embarrassment at her description turned to puzzlement. “The rest of who?”
“The family. God, those wonderful Ukrainian Gypsy looks, my father’s aristocratic handsomeness, Sydney’s impeccable glamor, Zack, the tough weather-beaten hunk.”
He’d like that one, Nick thought with a grin.
“Then you, somewhere between rock star and James Dean.” She sighed, exaggerating the sound. “I was a goner. Every girl’s entitled to a memorable first crush. And you were certainly mine.”
“Well.” He wasn’t sure how to react. “I guess I’m flattered.”
“You should be. I gave up Bobby MacAroy and Harrison Ford for you.”
“Harrison Ford? Pretty impressive.” He relaxed as their appetizers were served. “But who the hell’s Bobby MacAroy?”
“Only the cutest boy in my eighth-grade class. Of course, he was unaware that I planned for us to get married and have five kids.” She lifted her shoulder, let it fall.
“His loss.”
“You bet. Anyway, that day I just sort of looked at you, and worked on working up the courage to actually speak. Little freckled Fred,” she mused. “Among all those exotic birds.”
“You were like porcelain,” he murmured. “A little blond doll with enormous eyes. I remember saying something about how you didn’t look like your little brother and sister, and you explained that Natasha was technically your stepmother. I felt sorry for you.” He looked up again, losing himself for a moment in those depthless eyes. “Because I felt sorry for me—the out-of-step stepbrother. And you sat there, so serious, and told me step was just a word. It hit me,” he told her. “It really hit for the first time. And it made a difference.”
Her eyes had gone moist and soft. “I never knew that. You seemed so easy with Zack.”
“I tried to hate him for a long time. Never quite pulled it off, though I worked pretty hard at making life miserable for both of us. And then, I was hung up on Rachel.”
“Hung up? But…” Diplomatically Freddie trailed off and took an avid interest in her food.
He was easy with the memory now, had been for years. “Yeah, I was barely nineteen. And because I figured she was a class act with a great figure and incredible legs, I didn’t see how she could resist me. You’re blushing, Fred.
“Hey, every boy’s entitled to one memorable crush.” He grinned at her. “I was pretty ticked when I figured out Rachel and Zack had a thing going, made an idiot out of myself. Then I got over it, because they had something special. And because it finally occurred to me that I loved her, but I wasn’t in love with her. That’s how crushes end, right?”
She eyed him levelly. “Sometimes. And in a roundabout way, what we’ve been talking about right here proves my point about why we should work together.”
He waited while their appetizers were cleared and the second course was served. Interested, he picked up the wineglass that had just been topped off again. “How?”
To add emphasis to her pitch, Freddie leaned forward. And her perfume drifted over him so that his mouth watered. “We’re connected, Nick. On a lot of levels. We have a history, and some similarities in that history that go back to before we met.”
“You’re losing me.”
She gave an impatient shake of her head. “We don’t have to get into that. I know you, Nicholas. Better than you may think. I know what your music means to you. Salvation.”
His eyes clouded, and he lost interest in his meal. “That’s pretty strong.”
“It’s absolutely accurate,” she corrected. “Success is a byproduct. It’s the music that matters. You’d write it for nothing, you’d play it for nothing. It’s what kept you from sinking without a trace, every bit as much as the family did. You need it, and you need me to write the words for it. Because I hear the words, Nick, when I hear your music. I hear what you want it to say, because I understand you. And because I love you.”
He
studied her, trying to separate emotion and practicality. But she was right. He’d never been able to separate the two with his music. The emotion came first, and she’d tapped into that with the words she’d already written, and with the words she’d just spoken.
“You make a strong case for yourself, Fred.”
“For us. We’ll make a hell of a team, Nick. So much stronger and better than either of us could be separately.”
The music he’d played that morning wound through his head, her lyrics humming with it. It was ever you, in my heart, in my mind. No one before and no one after. For only one face have I always pined. You are the tears and the laughter.
A lonely song, he thought, and an achingly hopeful one. She was right, he decided—it was exactly what he’d intended.
“Let’s play it like this, Freddie. We’ll take some time, see how it goes. If we can come up with two other solid songs for the libretto, we’ll take it to the producers.”
Under the table, she tapped her nervous fingers on her knee. “And if they approve the material?”
“If they approve the material, you’ve got yourself a partner.” He lifted his glass. “Deal?”
“Oh, yes.” She tapped her glass against his, sounding a celebratory note. “It’s a deal.”
It was far more than the wine that had her feeling giddy when Nick walked her up to her hotel room after dinner. Laughing, she whirled, pressing her back against the door and beaming at him. “We’re going to be fabulous together. I know it.”
He tucked stray curls behind her ear, barely noticing that his fingertip skimmed the lobe, lingered. “We’ll see how it flies. Tomorrow, my place, my piano. Bring food.”
“All right. I’ll be there first thing in the morning.”
“You come before noon, I’ll have to kill you. Where’s your key, kid?”
“Right here.” She waved it under his nose before sliding it into the slot. “Want to come in?”
“I’ve got to finish off the late shift and close the bar. So…” His words, and his thoughts, trailed off as she turned back and slipped her arms around him. The quick flash of heat stunned him. “Get some sleep,” he began, and lowered his head to give her a chaste peck on the cheek.