by L. B. Dunbar
The friction was too much. My motions sped out of control. I couldn’t move fast enough over him. The unworldly sensation, as I rocked forward and back, increased the feeling. The anticipation was climbing through me, fluttering within. I sat up, as best I could, over him and arched my back as I came hard above him. I clenched and squeezed, feeling the thick shaft inside me as he pulsed upward. My heart raced. My breaths came in sharp pants. My body, however, was languid and finished.
I wanted to fall on him and let him hold me, but I sensed Abel wouldn’t want that. This wasn’t about comfort. This was about control. I was raising my hips to release him when he flipped us. Only semi-hard, he remained inside me. His arms looped underneath mine and a knee came under my thigh. We were in a strange type of embrace, with Abel still attached to me.
“Did I hurt you?” he breathed into my neck. He was careful to keep his lips off my skin.
“No,” I whispered. He covered me, but the weight wasn’t too much. Over time, he grew heavy and his breathing leveled out. He slid out of me, but still held me trapped, with his arms locked underneath mine, and his knee pinned under my thigh. It was almost like a wrestling hold, and the dead weight of Abel was assurance to keep me down for the count. While he drifted off to sleep, I lay awake, wired from our wild encounter. Abel had turned bitter toward me. My heart saddened to realize all the fighting I wanted resolved in the ring, didn’t measure up to the pain I suddenly felt outside it. I’d been fighting the wrong fight. Without realizing it, the thing I needed to fight for wasn’t in the ring. It was in my heart. It was Abel.
I woke alone. The pale light of morning filled my room. Sunshine brightened what looked like a storm from the night before. The ripped dress remained, as did Elma’s underwear. My pajama bottoms were sprawled on the floor. The sheets were disheveled, but there was no sign of her. I had a clear shot of the open door to my bathroom. Elma was gone: naked and gone.
I rose slowly; my body strangely sore from the fight with her. I took her with force, wanting to feel her and forget her. Then she came for me, and I gave in to her again: her warm mouth over me, the temptation of her tongue, the suction of her latched onto me. Elma didn’t fight fair. She’d come prepared to fight, and I definitely felt like the loser, waking alone, knowing she’d returned to Cain’s room. I would remain the loser as I needed to let Elma go. I couldn’t have a girl who wanted my brother. They always did once he was finished with them. Women wanted a repeat performance with the Cobra. One sting wasn’t enough.
I cursed myself for being rough with her. My head took over to block my heart. My body wanted to harm and heal. I didn’t feel either. It was my heart that ached. I dressed methodically, finding another pair of sweats and a t-shirt. I picked up Elma’s dress and ran the cool material over my face. It smelled like us. Tossing it on the bed, I went to exit my room. Barefoot, I walked down the hall toward Cain’s. Elma exited just as I drew close, but then so did Cain. He reached out for her and her arms came around his neck, much like when she clutched me. She pulled back and laid her hands flat on his chest, while Cain bent forward to kiss her forehead. The image was too sweet for Cain; the energy in me too hot.
Cain separated from her at my approach. The words, “Happy Birthday, Little Brother,” had just crossed his lips when I reached the doorway. In one broad step, I clocked him on the side of the head. Elma screamed and stepped back as Cain staggered then faced me. Fist raised, he glared at me with flaring nostrils.
“Do it!” I growled. “You know you want to.” Cain stared, panting with the struggle to calm himself. He’d never hit me. He might have insulted me. He might have pushed me out of his way, but he’d never struck out at me.
“Fight on, Little Brother,” he exhaled, lowering his fist. “In the ring.”
“Challenge accepted.” I brushed between him and Elma, purposely bumping into him like a punk, and ignoring Elma, despite her plea with my name. I had nothing left with her. I considered her debt paid. I would cover the actual finances with my father. As for my brother and Elma, once the Cobra struck, the Betta was left behind to flounder in his small confines. But that morning, I took a leap for escape and walked away.
Mr. Jacobson agreed to manage the fight from my side. My father would not take all the glory from me. Arranging the fight on his terms, his turf, put me at a disadvantage. Genesis Gym had the top of the line equipment, thanks to Cain and his sponsors. They also had amazing connections within Vegas. I would be returning to Highlands Gym in the Valley. Within a week, we had a date. The fight was set for the middle of May. The initial excitement over the potential of two brothers fighting, the Callahan brothers fighting one another, caused the venue to be moved from the Heston Towers to The Belfast Casino. I heard through Creed that Lindee’s family owned that resort.
“Dude, you do realize this is insane, right?” Creed asked one night as we sat drinking beer, two weeks after spring break.
I didn’t respond. We’d had this conversation numerous times. Each time the promo posted on social media or flashed across the cable station, Creed would say the same thing. There was a hint of excitement in his tone, growing higher and more enthusiastic with the increase of advertisements.
“I mean. You and your brother. Betta against Cobra. Abel against Cain. It’s…it’s biblical,” he laughed. I could only smirk. It wasn’t like we had never heard comments before, regarding our names. It seemed to be destiny we would fight. I could only hope my brother didn’t kill me in the end as history dictated. I’d been training hard, increasing my workout and rotations. My schoolwork was suffering, as I couldn’t concentrate. I was a bundle of nervous energy, constantly in need of motion. Sitting still made me a dead fish. Being near Elma stank like one.
I avoided her as much as possible. It wasn’t hard. We didn’t cross paths before I paid for her. We could easily slip back into our roles of never encountering one another. Unfortunately, I was much more popular on campus than I’d previously been. Not only had my name gotten out of the underground, but with the addition of this national campaign to promote the fight, I was recognized and acknowledged everywhere.
I’d heard rumors that Elma and I had been an item. I was too good for her, the girl sharing the gossip whispered loudly behind me in human anatomy. A second female voice answered with her version of the tale, saying she’d heard I was a one-time lover.
“Wonder if he’s as sexy as his brother?” she giggled. Their teasing banter sent mixed emotions inside me. I smiled internally as they tried to gain my attention, but my annoyance at the comparison to my brother stopped any laughter within. When I saw Elma enter the auditorium, my heart sank. I didn’t want people thinking Elma and I had simply banged, and then I threw her away like day old fish. Despite our last encounter, which was raw and rough, being with Elma had been more than a fuck for me. I felt complete with her. I wanted to care for her. I wanted to love her. But she hadn’t let me. She used me.
I decided that day would be another day I’d miss human anatomy, and I stood to exit the large room before class began. As I was leaving, I saw Sofie. She was sitting in the last row, a laptop open on the small desk ledge.
“Abel?” she said, surprised to see me standing at the end of her row. I walked between the chairs and stood near her.
“Hey, Sofie, why are you here?”
“I sometimes sit in on the class to get the most current notes for my TA sessions and study groups.”
I could only nod in understanding. Recalling the professor said he didn’t know her at the beginning of the semester, Sofie explained that she was a late hire to the position.
“Looks like you’re leaving?” she inquired, eyeing my backpack over my shoulder. “Not feeling human anatomy, today?” She smiled and the dark shadow of where we were lit up. Her eyes sparkled behind those red glasses. She kind of had this forbiddenness about her, which made her incredibly sexy. Her face slowly fell as I smiled back at her teasing tone.
“I heard about the fight,” she
said softly, looking at her computer screen as if it said something extremely important.
“Yeah, well, who hasn’t?” I laughed without humor. Sofie stared up at me, and I had the need to sit down near her, suddenly exhausted. I left a seat between us as I unfolded the auditorium chair. She watched me sit then spoke again.
“Why is he fighting you?” she asked. It was spoken as if she was familiar with my brother. She didn’t say his name, but she didn’t have to mention him.
“It’s about a girl,” I lied. I shrugged my shoulder and unintentionally looked across the room to find Elma watching me. She turned away quickly and I spun to face Sofie. Lying to Sofie felt very wrong, for some reason. When her blue eyes focused on me, I was compelled to explain the truth. “Actually it’s about our father.” I took a deep breath.
“I think he’s been waiting for this moment. For me to step up and fight like a man. He can no longer put me down, but my brother can. As my brother always stood up for me, it gives my father the ultimate power, if he can break Cain, to take me down.”
The words flowed easily out of my mouth. I hadn’t been able to phrase it before, but what I described to Sofie was true. If my father could force my brother’s hand against me, to fight me in place of my father as punisher, it proved he held the extreme authority. His word was the rule. His command was the way.
Sofie continued to watch me with those soft eyes.
“Does he want to fight you?”
“Who? Cain?”
“Your brother,” she swallowed hard, avoiding his name again. “Is he really that evil?”
I sighed and sat back in the confines of the wooden chair.
“I don’t think Cain’s evil. I’ve never understood his intentions, his actions, but I don’t think evil is the right word for him.”
“He killed a man,” she spoke quietly.
“He was cleared,” I answered casually, as if everyone knew Cain’s story. Sofie apparently did not, as her head spun and blue eyes blinked in confusion.
“It was an accident,” I clarified. “The other fighter fought without medical clearance. He couldn’t handle the fight in general.”
Sofie stared at me, the expression on her face, innocent shock. Slowly, the surprise faded and she resumed her cheerful, neutral face.
“It seems a bit extreme to have you fight in the ring to prove something to your father,” she stated.
“Oh, we aren’t proving something to him. He’s proving it to us.”
She focused on me, for a moment, and then slowly nodded as if she understood my meaning. I wondered what her connection was to my brother, but on the other hand, I didn’t want to be concerned about him.
“My brother seems to know you. He was looking for you.” At this, Sofie’s head spun to me again. Her eyes opened wide and her hand gripped the arm of her seat.
“Why?” she breathed out.
“Don’t know. He just wanted me to find you.”
Sofie paused, scrutinizing me behind her glasses. Her facial expression hardened a bit, and I realized that hardness could only come from some contact with Cain. Sofie was too soft for the bitter look on her face.
“Well, you found me,” she snarked, turning away from me. She closed the laptop with a sharp click and stood abruptly. Then she bent to pick up a bag and I stood as well.
“That I did,” I replied.
“And?” she stopped after looping the strap of the bag over her shoulder, holding the laptop before her like a shield.
“And, that’s it. I found you. Nothing more.” I shrugged again.
“Nothing more,” she mumbled. Her head hung for a second in defeat, then she shook it and pulled it upright again. She smiled weakly at me.
“How’s the human anatomy research project going?” she asked, as if no other conversation had occurred.
I saw Abel talking with Sofie Vincentia, the TA for human anatomy, and the best friend of Lucie Moretti, my roommate. While it looked like a regular discussion between a teaching assistant and a student, it appeared more intimate. I wasn’t aware that Abel knew Sofie as more than the assistant for our class, but my imagination went into overdrive; I pictured him asking her to be his tutor. We had an exam coming up on the sex organs of the human body. I envisioned him using her for a visual aid, the way he’d examined me. My heat pulsed but my heart dropped. Abel was completely ignoring me. When he said he was finished with me, he meant it.
I casually looked over my shoulder in their direction once to be caught by Abel, watching him. In my peripheral vision, I noticed movement in the dark shadows at the back of the auditorium. They left together long before class was finished. I gathered my things when class was done and was exiting my aisle, when I bumped into Thor. If I didn’t know better, I would have guessed he did it on purpose. The nudge was casual, but enough to grab my attention.
“Hey,” he said, sheepishly.
“What do you want, Thor?”
“So I noticed your boy is getting the fight of a lifetime.” He nodded in the direction of the emptying door. Abel was long gone, but the reference was implied.
“Yeah, he’s fighting his brother. How is that the fight of a lifetime?”
“His brother’s Cain Callahan, the Cobra. Isn’t that what you wanted? A fight.”
I stared at Thor.
“Is that how he found out?” I questioned, mumbling the words to the tiled floor. I wasn’t in my right mind at the Callahan’s to inquire how Atom Callahan discovered my plan.
“I went to set the fight,” Thor announced, pleased with himself.
“You?” I questioned again. “You didn’t want to fight him.”
“Oh, yes, I did,” Thor exaggerated.
“But I thought…after…” I stared at him, not able to complete my thoughts.
“I still wanted the fight,” Thor said with a slow shrug of his broad shoulders.
“You…” My voice trailed off again. He was still willing to fight Cain Callahan, despite what happened with Abel interrupting his attempts to sleep with me.
“This is perfect,” I blurted. “You can fight Cain instead. Abel shouldn’t do this. It isn’t right for him to fight his brother.” My heart rate increased with the excitement. If Cain would just choose to fight Thor instead, this would solve everything. Abel just needed Thor to take his place. One of the Callahan brothers had to step down. There could still be a fight, just a different one.
“Oh, I plan to fight Cain, after he beats the crap out of his brother.”
I was stunned.
“What if Abel wins?” I suggested, not even comprehending that two seconds before I was hoping the two brothers wouldn’t fight one another, after all.
“I’ve been promised I get to fight the winner. I’m actually hoping Abel does win. Knock that brother of his down a notch, and then I get my shot in the ring again with him. This time, he’ll go down like the stinking fish he is.”
I stared in disbelief.
“You fight the winner?” I repeated, uncertain I’d heard him correctly.
“Yep. For revealing your little plan, I’ve been guaranteed a fight with the winner,” Thor’s green eyes practically sparkled, and his smile broadened across his fake tan face. I had no response. I turned and stormed out of the auditorium.
“Hey. I was hoping we could get together again,” Thor shouted after me. “We can seal our own deal,” he laughed. I kept walking. As I entered the long hall outside the classroom, I noticed Sofie sitting with Abel on a couch set in an arrangement for study sessions. Abel looked up at me with those bright blue eyes, and my heart broke. He turned away instantly, and I continued to walk on by without further acknowledging him.
I received a message when I returned to Lindee’s apartment from the landlord of my mother’s home. She was two months behind on rent, and he wondered when it would be paid. It was unfortunate that my phone number was attached to the lease. It wasn’t going to be paid by me. I didn’t know what to do, but I had to cover expenses wi
th Lindee and the girls first. I was making enough money at The Dance Academy to cover my responsibility, but I couldn’t fork the bill for my mother’s place as well.
“What am I going to do?” I covered my face as I spoke to Lindee in the living room.
“Can’t you call one of Montana’s old friends? His coach? His trainer? Anyone? How is this your responsibility? It should be the other way around?” Lindee encouraged. She didn’t understand, though. Lindee had always been taken care of, just like my mother and me. She couldn’t comprehend there was no one else. My father was long gone. Montana’s trainer had his own family and had moved on. Montana’s coach disappeared. I only had the phone number of Montana’s lawyer, and I didn’t wish to speak with him again. He did what he could, but what he wanted was the loan sharks paid and his fee retained. That’s what left us without any other means.
My mother had been pampered her whole life, as well. She hadn’t known how to take care of herself. She claimed to love Montana’s father until he died. She married my father when she got pregnant by him and they lived an unhappy marriage. When he left, she took what she could get from him, until he disappeared completely from our lives. By then, Montana was making money the old fashion way: fighting. He took over by seventeen where my father left off. Montana became the breadwinner and my mother took the bread. She had worked, but I was never clear what her employment consisted of. Odd jobs for men associated with the fight, somehow earned her extra money. She had many connections, just like Montana, but when he died, they all seemed to disappear.