“Thank you, Becca.”
She shook her head and forced her next words out. “James, he was just one person. Nobody else is going to harm Zippo. Please don’t go.”
Startled, Alec looked between her and James. “James,” he murmured. “Don’t make any hasty decisions. Bronick was just one person. We love Zippo. And I adore having you around.”
“We all do,” Alice stated firmly. “I think we should move James to a different cabin. That one will hold bad memories even if the ‘ass that is’ doesn’t live there anymore.”
“All the temp cabins are full,” Becca said.
“We’ll figure something out,” Alec stated. “Alice, why don’t you take Becca for a coffee? I’m going to sit with James for a while.”
Alice nodded and ushered Becca toward the door. “We’ll bring you some,” she said over her shoulder as they left.
Chapter Eight
James felt shattered. In just the short amount of time he’d been on the island, he’d begun to feel safe. True, his roommate situation hadn’t been ideal, but everyone else was nice. But knowing that Bronick tried to kill Zippo was too much. James didn’t know if he could exist without his little dog. He’d never realized growing up how lonely he felt. Zippo was his constant companion and loved him without question.
He’d let him down. He should have taken Zippo into the bathroom with him. That would have solved everything. He’d promised to keep Zippo safe after finding him in that dumpster and he’d failed.
“Hey,” Alec said, still rubbing his back. “What are you thinking?”
Zippo licked his chin. His little body was still shivering though that was most likely because he felt James’s emotions.
“I failed him,” he whispered.
“Whoa,” Alec said firmly and pulled James away from his body. He lifted James’s chin and made him look into his eyes. “You failed who?”
“Zippo.”
“No, James. You didn’t fail anyone. Look at the little guy. He had a scare, but he’s fine. Don’t let one asshole destroy your happiness. Right now, Craig is watching him pack and then they’re tossing his ass off the island. You’ll never have to deal with Bronick again.”
“But I let Zippo down. After I found him in that dumpster, I promised him that I’d never let anything bad happen to him again. I failed.”
Alec shook his head, a wry smile on his face. “No matter how much we want to protect the ones we love from all harm, we can’t. There will always be things we can’t account for. Besides, look at him.”
James wiped the tears from his eyes and looked down at Zippo. There was worry in his little dog’s eyes, but when James looked at him, he wagged his tail.
“See. He’s already coming back from the event. Zippo’s already forgotten it probably. Dogs are good at that. Now he’s just worried about you.”
James scratched him behind the ears and Zippo’s tail wagged harder. “I don’t understand people like that,” he said in a hoarse voice. “Why would anyone hurt such a wonderful little animal?”
“Some people are stupid and some are downright cruel,” Alec said, his hand continuing that calming rub up and down James’s back. “But I’m thinking of you, James. I’d hate to think you left the island because of the actions of someone who doesn’t even belong here. I’ve seen your strength over the last few days. Leaving is an automatic fear response and entirely understandable under the circumstances. But is that what you want?”
James glanced into Alec’s eyes, prepared to lie and say that yes it was, but the moment he looked into those attractive hazel orbs, he couldn’t. “No,” he said honestly. “I like it here. I like you and Slate and all the people I’ve met. Kendrick’s amazing to work for. He trusts me and it makes me feel important.” Heat flooded into his cheeks at the admission. The fact was, he’d always felt like a strain on his mother’s family. His father never failed to show how disappointed he was in James. Kendrick’s trust was a wondrous thing.
Alec’s eyes softened. “Has anyone ever told you what an amazing person you are?”
More heat flooded into James’s cheeks. “I’m not amazing.”
“Yes. You are,” Alec stated with finality. “Just in the time I’ve known you, I’ve seen it. Kendrick has always been good with understanding people. He saw the good in you too. Becca’s relieved because you’ve taken some of the weight off his shoulders by taking on the accounting. Slate adores you. Zippo thinks you hang the moon. And I,” he said, leaning in and resting his forehead against James’s, “think you’re amazing. I can’t wait to get to know you more.”
“I’m really not amazing,” James whispered, not wanting to break the moment but wanting to be honest. He wasn’t much of a catch and Alec should realize that.
Alec chuckled softly. “Yes, you are. You rescued Zippo and take incredible care of him. You were nervous about it and embarrassed, but you had the guts to ask me to teach you about BDSM. That takes some guts, James. You do have some issues with self-confidence, and I’d love to help you work through them. But the man I see? You’re amazing and the more you open up, the more amazing you’ll be. You’re like a rose bud. All tightened up lest someone come along and hurt it and then one day it blossoms into a full, beautiful rose. I want to see you blossom, James.”
There was no way to block himself from such wonderful words. James blinked. “Wow.”
“Yes, wow,” Alec agreed. “Now what do you say we take Zippo for a walk? I think you could use it as well. Get out some of your nerves from what just happened. Then you can finish your work day. I still plan on making us dinner if you’re interested.”
If he was interested. How could he not be? James smiled. “Yes. I’d love to.”
“Good.” Alec patted him on his back. “Why don’t you get Zippo’s halter on and we’ll head out.”
They walked along the water’s edge on the western shore of the island. Zippo barked at the water as it came up, would jump away when it hit his paws, and then chase it as it went back out to sea. He had definitely recovered. James still felt off about the event.
Alec slid his fingers between James’s and held his hand, drawing his attention away. Nobody had ever held his hand before. It was nice.
“Tell me about your life growing up,” Alec encouraged. “I get the feeling it wasn’t all roses and kittens.”
James snorted at the concept. “No. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Mom and her family were nice enough. I was just different from the very beginning. My cousins liked video games. I preferred to study. Horses were a big thing as my grandfather ran a stable. The whole family was into it. I liked the horses, but there were so many rules about what I could do when I was around them.”
“Like what?” Alec asked, looking at him in confusion.
“They were race horses. So they were pretty high strung anyway. So no running around, no feeding them apples or sugar unless okayed by their trainers.” James shrugged. “Plus, the trainers didn’t like me much. Sometimes I wondered if they surmised I was gay.”
Alec squeezed his hand. “When did you know?”
“Not sure if there was ever a specific time,” James said, thinking about it. “I was always drawn to men. But my family’s ultra-conservative. Gay was the kiss of death. So I told nobody.”
“What about your father? Did you know him?”
“He showed up when I was twelve. Just out of the blue one day. I guess I was the product of a one-night stand.” He could still remember that rainy day his mother came into his room and announced his father was there to see him. He’d been so excited. Until he met and got to know Kaliq. It became apparent very quickly that he did not pass muster. “He’s Muslim,” he said in a quieter tone. “He wants me to join Islam and hounds me about it constantly. To be honest, I never wanted to go to college, but college allowed me to get out of going to Saudi Arabia.”
“Shit,” Alec murmured. “They have some pretty strict laws about homosexuality over there.”
“
Yeah. It’s why I…” He blew out a breath. “Elan Isle was an escape for me. I finished defending my dissertation a few days before I left. My father thinks I’m not done until June. He kind of put his foot down that now I had my doctorate that I was going to work for an uncle in Saudi.” James shuddered. “I couldn’t. I mean, it’s not like I was particularly out. Only my friend Stan knew. But I couldn’t go live in a country where just by being me, I was subject to death.”
Alec drew him closer and slid an arm around him. “I’m glad you came, James. And not just because I think you’re cute and hot and I look forward to all the wonderful things I can teach you. I also think being here is the best move you’ve made. You can be completely out. Kendrick doesn’t put up with homophobia. His brother’s gay and he stamps on anyone who sneers at the concept. Think about it. A place where you can find out who you are.”
Zippo yipped, drawing their attention. He stood on a rock a few feet away while the surf plunged in around the base. “Well, stop fighting the ocean,” James teased. Zippo looked over and wagged his tail furiously. He was having fun. “I’m glad most people seem to like him. He’s a great dog.”
“He is,” Alec agreed. “And most of that is due to you. Now, why don’t we walk back so you can finish your workday and I can go start dinner?”
“What are we having?” James asked with interest.
“Steak, potatoes, and I’m going to beg some dessert off Slate,” Alec said with a twinkle in his eyes. “He bakes for the caf, but he also makes new recipes at home and is always willing to let people taste test. I’ll explain he’ll have two people who can give him their opinions.”
James chuckled. “I like him. He mentioned heading to Victoria this weekend if I wanted to go. But I don’t think I can leave Zippo alone that long.”
“Pfft,” Alec said good naturedly. “I’ll dog sit. I promise to take ultra-good care of Sir Zippo while you have fun with Slate.” He patted James’s hip. “You need to go have some fun, babe.”
The endearment went straight to James’s dick. He’d day dreamed about faceless men calling him “Honey” or “Sweetie” but those always felt weird. “Babe” from Alec’s lips felt electric. “You’re sure you wouldn’t mind?” he asked.
“Not at all. He and I will go for a long walk. He can keep me company while I work. And he can share my meals. We’ll be fine.”
James chuckled, imagining a very happy dog after such a day. “He’s going to love staying at Uncle Alec’s.”
“Good. I want him to love being there. Then you’ll feel comfortable in my home.”
Before he could think of a response, Alec kissed him and his warm lips pressed against James’s made his brain screech to a halt. How had he never understood how amazing kissing could be? He always thought kissing was just a first step. It was more like going from zero to turned on at a flick of a switch. Or maybe that was just Alec. He had no idea and when Alec trailed his tongue along the crease between James’s lips, he let them fall open and moaned as the taste of Alec filled his mouth.
It was intoxicating and he felt he could become addicted quite quickly. Especially as Alec thrust his tongue all the way in, covering James’s and licking along the top of his mouth.
Holy mother of God. His toes tingled and he grasped hold of Alec’s shoulders to steady himself.
“Shh,” Alec murmured against his lips. “Calm down, boy. This is just the beginning.”
Hell. If this was just the beginning, James was gonna come before Alec even breached his ass. When Alec dipped his tongue in again, James whimpered. Alec drew back and looked at him, a slow smile crossing his lips. “I like that sound. And I like that look on you. You look ready to be ravaged.”
Oh yes. Please.
James panted slightly as he tried to pull himself together. A bark drew his attention but he felt like he was in slow motion. He turned and as the water swept up around the chihuahua and lifted him up, he didn’t even have time to get terrified Zippo would be whisked off into the water before Alec rescued his little dog from the surf and carried him back.
Zippo’s tail lashed back and forth. He’d obviously had fun. Alec took James’s hand again and led him away from the water and onto firm land. “Come on,” Alec said, looking down at Zippo. “Let’s get your owner back to the office. He needs a little rest time before tonight.”
A tingle went down James’s spine and he tried to hide a smile. He looked forward to their evening together. With Alec’s kisses turning him to mush, just what would him fucking do? James could hardly wait to find out.
Chapter Nine
Zippo trotted straight toward Alec’s front door. Whereas James felt like he needed to gear up what guts he’d had the day before, Zippo had no such qualms and yipped loudly. Before James could even knock on the door, it opened.
All the air around him seemed to disappear as he took in the man in front of him. Instead of the lounge clothes of jeans and t-shirts he was used to seeing him in, Alec was dressed in dark brown leather pants and no shirt whatsoever. Several tattoos crossed his upper chest but James couldn’t seem to concentrate on any of them enough to figure out what they were.
“Hey,” Alec said as he scratched Zippo behind the ears and stepped back to let them in. “Good timing. The barbecue is ready for the steaks. Why don’t you get us something to drink while I change? I was trying these on to make sure they fit right for the season.”
James managed to nod and followed Zippo into the house. Alec was a fox. Where did he get all those muscles from? Not to mention those tattoos. James thought ink was sexy, though he’d been too terrified of needles to consider getting one himself.
He went into the kitchen and opened the fridge. It was filled with the beer Alec had enjoyed the weekend before so he pulled one of those out. There was also a jug of lemonade so he poured himself a glass.
“You’re welcome to take Zippo off leash,” Alec said, startling him as he walked into the kitchen. James cast a quick glance, relieved Alec was wearing long shorts and a t-shirt. Maybe he could gain his equilibrium back.
“I figured since we were going out back I should probably keep him on lead. Don’t want him bouncing off after another critter.” Especially since Alec lived close to the northern shore. Zippo could get carried away by the current too easily.
“No worries,” Alec said with a wink. “Unless he can jump over three feet, I think I’ve got us set. Come on. I’ll show you.”
Alec grabbed both of their drinks and James let Zippo pull him along. He still wasn’t sure about letting him off lead. Until he stepped out of the door onto Alec’s back porch. “You put up a fence.” In a large arc, there was a small and yet sturdy three foot fence around his porch and grass.
“Yep. One of the things I found in town today. Figured little Zippo would like a little free reign.”
Pleased, James unhooked the halter and Zippo instantly leaped off the porch and checked out the enclosed space. “That’s great. I hate having to keep him on leash, but don’t want him to get away.”
“It’s no problem,” Alec assured him. “So, if I remember, you like your steaks medium well, right?”
“Yes.” With Zippo safe, he walked up to where Alec was putting two huge steaks on a barbecue. “Is this gas?”
“I figured it was safer than charcoal. And a little easier to run in the winter.”
They discussed simple things, from accounting to Alec’s toys. “I saw the name of your shop,” James said as he sat on the edge of the porch while Alec manned the barbecue. “Cock and Bull? Does that have some BDSM meaning?”
Alec chuckled. “Yes and No. One of my specialties is what’s called CBT, cock and ball torture. Given my build, I started calling my shop the Cock and Bull years ago. It stuck and I kept the name for the Faire.”
“Cock and ball torture?” James pulled his knees in and forced himself not to cover his crotch.
“Just one of the many BDSM side lines,” Alec said as though it was normal. Well, Jame
s supposed, to him it was. “Don’t let the words scare you. There are a lot of levels to CBT. Anything from teasing your genitals but not letting you come, to full on ball crushers that do exactly what they sound like.”
“Ouch.” He couldn’t stop himself from duly protecting his goods. “Why would any guy allow that?”
“Everyone’s kinks are different, James.” Alec turned over one of the steaks and there was a huge hiss. Zippo ran over to see what it was. The dog had absolutely no fear. “Don’t you worry,” Alec said as he reached down and scratched Zippo’s back. “You’ll get some steak.
“There will probably be a lot of BDSM activities that scare you at first,” Alec continued as he turned the baked potatoes. “But you have to keep in mind, James, that you only ever want to play with someone who has the same goals you do. So let’s start there. Why do you want to learn BDSM?”
He didn’t have to think about the answer. James already knew. “It sounds interesting and kind of hot. Not the ball-crusher things,” he added quickly making Alec chuckle. “But the giving up control thing. I’ve watched Becca. She’s happy and yet she’s given over a lot of control to Kendrick. She seems… at peace.”
“She is,” Alec agreed. “Think about it this way,” he said after taking a swig from his bottle. “Kendrick enjoys taking care of her, guiding her, and having her submit to him. He wants to keep her safe and happy. She’s happiest when serving him and allowing him to make the big decisions. She told me once that making choices was a major skill that she never attained. That when asked to make any decision from what wine she wanted at a restaurant to her career choice, she would go into a tizzy, ripping herself up into little pieces until she more let the result happen than made the conscious choice. By giving up that to Kendrick, she wasn’t tying herself up in constant knots.”
Making His Stand Page 6