by Ines Saint
“In December, he’s going off for a year, taking a sabbatical to go climb the Himalayas or something.”
“The Himalayas?” Liz repeated.
“Or something,” Justin called over his shoulder as he left.
“He really is good looking,” Isabella thought out loud. “He looks like that wolf man in those mutant movies.”
“Who, Justin?” Liz asked, surprised. “He shaved his hair off as soon as he realized he was going bald — he hardly looks like a wolf man.”
“No, I mean Nicholas Grey,” Isabella clarified. “I think he looks like the actor who plays that wolf man. Although my son is, of course, even better looking.”
“You mean Wolverine from the X-Men movies, Grandma,” Hannah corrected.
“He does kind of look like that guy who plays Wolverine. Hugh Jackson,” Liz agreed.
“Hugh Jackman, Mom.” Hannah rolled her eyes before turning to Jamie. “So … you have a crush on Nick Grey of all people? That’s just too funny. Oh! We should code name him Wolverine. That’s what my friends and I do when we have a crush on someone. We give them code names.”
Jamie was alarmed. “I was just teasing Justin. You know, the way you tease Chris. It’s what sisters are born to do — annoy their brothers. But I do not have a crush on … Wolverine. I was only kidding.”
“You have a crush on Wolverine?” Chris, Liz’s ten-year-old son, appeared from nowhere.
“No,” they all said at once.
“Go away,” Hannah added.
Chris grabbed a juice box from the fridge before leaving, and Jamie waited a moment before peering behind the wall to see if anyone else was there. She saw her father putting his arm around Chris’s shoulders, their backs to Jamie.
“Hey, is dinner almost ready?” her father asked.
Chris shrugged.
“What’re they talking about in there?”
“Blah! Stupid girl stuff. I don’t get them.”
Jamie’s father laughed. He then turned and winked at Jamie.
“I don’t know, you certainly sounded convincing when you were defending Nick’s looks,” Liz said to her back.
“This is good news, Jamie. If you’re taking the time to notice a man’s looks, you may be ready to start dating again!” Isabella’s Nuyorican accent had faded over the years, but it always came back with a vengeance when she was excited. She looked so hopeful now that Jamie almost didn’t want to burst her delusional little bubble. Almost.
“Listen, people, I was trying to get on Justin’s nerves. That is all. I do not have a crush on Nick Grey. I don’t even like him.”
“Really. Why not? He’s a great guy,” Liz said before quickly turning around to make sure Justin wasn’t there.
“Well, because — ”
“Hannah!” They heard Justin call. “One of your friends is calling you on my cell phone!”
“Ahh … just when this was all getting interesting,” Hannah whined before leaving. But her mother and Liz were still looking at her expectantly.
“Okay. Listen. When I saw him over at the school that first day, I was surprised to see he hadn’t lost his looks. I mean, after listening to Justin’s description, I was expecting Shrek. But I think he must’ve noticed my surprise and taken it to mean something because at the end of our meeting he gave me a sort of warning. I can’t remember his exact words because it was the way he said it that really got to me, but it was like he was telling me to not even look at him that way because he was done raising kids, and he wouldn’t go there again.”
“Wow, what a jerk.” Liz’s eyes widened. But then she grew thoughtful. “Except, well, I don’t know, that doesn’t sound like him.”
“Are you sure you didn’t misunderstand? Maybe he said something about not wanting to raise any more kids, but it wasn’t directed to you, specifically.”
Jamie shook her head. “No. I’m sure what he said was intended for me. And it was so ridiculous.” She paused to toss chopped onions into a skillet. “But he was very good about remembering little details I told him about the kids the other day.” He’d also let Joseph’s comment slide because the kids were there, she didn’t add. “So I’ll try to keep an open mind about him overall, but I don’t think I’ll ever forget he has this … bigheaded side to him.”
“Describe the physical reaction you had when you saw him,” Liz ordered. “Did your eyes bug out or something? I mean, you must’ve had a very visible reaction for him to feel he had to warn you.”
Heat gushed through my veins, making me feel warm and flushed all over, Jamie thought, but instead she said, “You want me to describe what? You’re kidding, right?” She grabbed a green pepper and proceeded to chop it up into pieces. “Although, you are married to my brother so I can see why you need to get your thrills elsewhere.”
Liz laughed and walked over to Jamie, enveloping her in an unexpected hug. “I’m so glad you’re finally back home, tormenting your brother like you used to, and laughing like you used to.”
Isabella slipped an arm around Jamie’s waste. “Sí, mamita. We know how hard the last five years were on you, even if you never want to talk about it.”
“Why were the last five years hard on you, Mommy? Because of us? We’re five years old … ” a confused Michael asked. Liz, Jamie, and Isabella all turned to look at him, surprised he’d snuck up on them.
Jamie, who’d been feeling like she was going to tear up, quickly switched gears and gave her son her warmest smile. “Grandma meant the last two years, honey.” She squatted down in front of him.
“Because of Daddy?” Michael asked.
“Yes, because of Daddy.” Jamie hugged him to her. “It’s just the last five years were hard on Grandma because she wanted to have us all closer to her, and she missed us so much. She got confused, that’s all.”
“Because of her age?” Michael asked, giving Jamie, Liz, and Isabella a reason to smile.
“Because of my age.” Isabella mussed Michael’s hair, shooting Jamie an apologetic look.
• • •
Jamie was nervous the morning of the kids’ first day of school, and she didn’t want to add her “physical reactions” and memories of awkward meetings with Nick to the mix. So she subtly sidestepped the line of parents greeting the headmaster and walked on to the kindergarten, where Mrs. Gardner, the school principal, and Miss Dwyer, the teacher, were receiving children.
She stepped in to see a freshly painted, warm classroom. The walls were a soft yellow, decorated with everything from the alphabet to colors and farm animals. Plenty of natural light shone through. She took a few pictures, but got up to go when she saw other parents were leaving.
“Mommy, can’t you stay?” Timmy grabbed onto her leg.
“I really can’t, sweetie, but I know you’re going to have a great time. You’ll learn new things and make friends.”
“And I’ll take care of you just like Mommy would,” Michael said. “I’ll open your juice box and sharpen your pencils if you need help.”
“Mommy, don’t leave!” Timmy began crying.
Jamie and the teacher’s assistant spent the next ten minutes calming Timmy down. There was another little girl crying, and the harder one cried, the higher the other’s wails would go. For Jamie, it was torture.
She was finally able to leave the classroom, her heart in a million pieces and her whole body feeling heavier than usual.
On her way out, Nick was standing in the courtyard, talking to a few parents. When he saw her, he broke away just long enough to tell her, “Hey, it’ll be okay. I promise it gets easier.”
And he was right. In a few short weeks, the kids were both happy and settled into their new school. Timmy actually got used to the new routine faster than Michael.
Jamie enjoyed spending her days pouring her
self into her business. There was an old woodshed on her property that Justin had turned into a small studio for her. There, she worked on her craft, letting her imagination reign free. She hadn’t had this much time to herself in five years.
The hours would fly by, from the initial sketches and blueprints to the final, more elaborate details. But by the time one-thirty rolled around each day, she was already longing for Michael and Timmy’s hugs and eager to hear about their day.
When she glanced at her calendar one Thursday, she was surprised to see that it was already the last day of September. The first month of school had flown by.
The phone interrupted Jamie’s thoughts. The caller ID flashed the school’s number.
“Mrs. Sullivan?” a voice that sounded like Claire’s asked.
“This is she.” Jamie tried not to sound panicky. The school had never called her and she wanted to blurt out are my kids okay?
“Your boys are both fine.” Claire read her mind, but added, “However, there’s been an incident with Timmy. It’s nothing for you to worry about, but Nick would like to talk to you in person. It’s really not an over-the-phone matter. How soon can you come in?”
Jamie was standing in front of Claire twenty minutes later.
Claire ushered Jamie into Nick’s office. “Can Claire stay?” she asked, after shaking Nick’s hand. He looked taken aback by the request, but Claire answered for him.
“It’s the last day of the month and parents are paying tuition. I’m sorry, sweetie, but I can’t leave the front office alone.”
Jamie nodded as Claire left, and Nick motioned her to the chair in front of his desk.
“What happened?” Jamie asked in a polite tone that didn’t betray her impatience.
“Well, Miss Dwyer was talking about seatbelt safety today. She was explaining how seatbelts save lives, and Timmy burst out in tears, saying it wasn’t true, that seatbelts didn’t save lives. Miss Dwyer really didn’t know what to do or say, and Michael just stopped speaking altogether. She brought them here, and I had Claire call you, but the school counselor and I managed to calm Timmy down, playing a few games. Michael eventually got into the games, too, and they appear to be fine now.”
“Why didn’t you tell me what happened over the phone? I could’ve calmed them down. Where are they?” Jamie felt sick, knowing the boys had been thinking about their dad.
“We called you so you could come in, talk to them, and take them home if they were still agitated. I guarantee you wouldn’t have been much help over the phone. But you need to trust me when I tell you they’re fine now, and they’ve both settled back into their daily routine. It’s best if you talk to them when they get home and you’ve all settled into your routine. The school counselor agrees with me. It’s your choice, of course, but I hope you take my opinion into consideration.”
Jamie put her hands over her face and tried to think straight. Her impulse was to gather them up and take them home right now. But her instinct told her they might feel they did something wrong if she pulled them out of class early. What she couldn’t seem to do was trust Nick and the school counselor’s opinion. What did they know about her kids?
“Can I take a peek at them and make sure they’re all right?”
“Of course. Come around.” He motioned to the larger of two flat-screen monitors on his desk. Jamie came around as Nick typed, and a bunch of little boxes with different classrooms gave way to a full view of Miss Dwyer’s room.
The children were all smiling at something Miss Dwyer was holding up. Michael put his hand over his mouth and laughed, and Timmy took the opportunity to lean forward and pull on a little girl’s pigtails.
The girl looked back, and Timmy looked up at the ceiling. She punched him in the arm, and he stuck his tongue out at her. The teacher must’ve caught him because he nodded and sat up straight a moment later. Jamie glanced over at Nick, who chuckled and said, “I’ll pretend I didn’t see that.”
Jamie smiled and walked back to her seat. “I think I should let them stay. I’ll just wait out front so you can find me if anything else happens. There’s only an hour left anyway.”
“Fair enough. But I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you a difficult and personal question before you leave.”
Jamie knew what it was. She’d never told anyone at school anything about Scott. It dawned on her now they should know what happened to him, in case it ever came up again. But she dreaded the subject.
She quietly studied Nick before taking in a deep, steadying breath, stating the facts as succinctly and painlessly as possible. “Their father Scott, he suffered a brain aneurism on his way to work. He managed to pull over, but a moment later, he was gone. Michael and Timmy don’t really understand it yet, but they know that what happened to their father happened in a car. And he was, of course, wearing a seatbelt. They’ve actually asked me about that because of all of the public service announcements.”
“I’m sorry,” Nick said, and she was grateful he didn’t say anything else. Simple was best, speeches were uncomfortable. She got up to leave and Nick followed her lead. Before he opened the door for her, he turned to face her. “Jamie?”
She looked up, again feeling the slight shock of looking into such clear eyes. They were more of a sea green in the absence of sunlight.
“Why did you want Claire to stay?”
Jamie looked down and decided to tell him the truth. She was too exhausted from her earlier emotional distress to come up with anything else. “Because our last two meetings ended badly, and I wanted to have a buffer.”
“You don’t trust me?”
Jamie was sure that the fact that she didn’t was written all over her face. Though she was grateful for the caring way he’d handled the situation with her boys, she just didn’t have it in her to trust people who behaved one way one moment, and another way the next.
“Listen, Jamie, I’m sorry about how our first meeting ended. I know I was out of line. I don’t know what came over me and I would’ve apologized before, but I didn’t know how to bring it up. Really, you have no idea how badly I felt the moment the words were out of my mouth.”
Jamie had to give him props for apologizing. It couldn’t be easy. “Thank you for apologizing. I didn’t know how to bring it up either, but I assure you I was not coming on to you. You were being friendly and I was just responding in kind.”
• • •
Nick looked down at Jamie as she told him, firmly, that she had no interest in him.
He noticed a tiny birthmark on the right side of her upper lip. Never would he have thought a little detail like that could make an upper lip so enticing. “I knew that,” he answered.
Jamie raised an eyebrow in disbelief. As much as he wanted her to believe him, there was nothing more he could say. He was about to open the door, eager to get her lips out of his office, when she smilingly said, “I won’t hold your huge ego against you if you don’t hold my father-in-law’s behavior against me.”
She hadn’t smiled at him since she’d last been in his office, and he realized he’d needed her smile to feel things could be normal between them. “I wouldn’t hold that against you. And I don’t have a huge ego.”
She smirked.
“I’m a nice guy with a very reasonably sized ego. I’ll prove it to you.”
“You don’t need to prove anything to me, Nick. We’re good, okay?” She laughed.
“Will you stop avoiding me?”
“I’ll stop avoiding you.”
“Good, then you’ll have a chance to see how meek and unpretentious I am.”
“Now that I seriously doubt.” She opened the door and left.
At least they’d gotten awkwardness out of the way, though it was obvious she really did think he had a huge ego. Should he let it go, or prove her wrong? Proving her wrong would
be more enjoyable.
Chapter Four
With everything that had happened the day before, Jamie forgot to pay tuition. She arrived early to pay because the kids were going to the dentist right after school, but Claire wasn’t in the front office.
Outside, there were other parents and grandparents milling around, but she only knew the people she’d gone to school with.
People from her past always wanted to know what she’d been up to the last twelve years, since graduating from high school. But it was hard to talk about Scott, and strange to leave him out of the conversation. She always ended up being too brief. It was one reason she avoided just standing around.
A group of five moms she didn’t know was gathered in front of her, but there was something formidable about them. They were all perfectly groomed, their faces made up a little too flawlessly. They all had good posture and wore expensive-looking clothes.
What was up with that?
“Excuse me!” a voice with a twang called. Jamie turned to see a plump blonde with a head full of curls waving at her. She was sitting next to a woman who looked like an older version of the moms she was just thinking about. Jamie walked over to them as the dimpled blonde made room for her on the bench.
“Hi, I’m Charlene, and this is Mrs. Kirkpatrick,” the blonde spoke.
Mrs. Kirkpatrick gave Jamie one of those womanly, barely touching handshakes, and Jamie sat on the edge of the bench next to Charlene.
“I’m Jamie Sullivan.”
“You’ve got twin boys in kindergarten, right?” Charlene asked and Jamie nodded.
“I’ve got a daughter in second grade; she gets out at two-thirty, and another girl in Pre-K. Mrs. Kirkpatrick here has a grandson in Pre-K. You should come and sit with us in the afternoons.”
“And it’s a lot more fun over here with us than with the Stepford Wives over there,” Mrs. Kirkpatrick remarked.
Jamie was surprised by the woman’s candor, especially since Mrs. Kirkpatrick looked like an older version of the “Stepford Wives.”