Abandon

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by Moors, Jerusha


  They were all the same person, a young girl with chestnut hair and laughing brown eyes. Two were formal sittings, but the rest showed her in more natural poses, picking wild flowers or picnicking on a lawn. Another showed her sitting on a tree branch, laughing, with dainty toes just peeking from under the hem of her dress.

  The last portrait showed her laying on a robe in the grass, her eyes languorous and her mouth in a sweet smile. She was nude, pink nipples peeking out from between long chestnut curls. One arm trailed over her hip, her dainty hand covering the chestnut curls at the juncture of her thighs. Aubrey squatted in front of it, studying the face that had haunted his dreams, sleeping and waking. He reached out and gently caressed the cheek as if he could feel her soft skin under his finger tip once again.

  He stood back up and wandered over to his easel. His latest portrait was half-finished and was of Lucilla as she stood in the ballroom the evening when he had first seen her again. Her peach dress glowed in the candlelight and she had her hair piled up regally on her head. He wished that she was here standing before him. Aside from one miniature that he had done for her, he had painted all the portraits from memory. But it would be glorious to have her sit for him again, the easy banter between them while he painted until he had to go over and kiss her plump lips, so soft and sweet.

  Aubrey scratched at the scruff on his face as he suddenly realized the truth. There was no impediment between him and Lucy. Instead of lamenting the lost five years, he would create a new future for them. She might hate him now, but he would win her back. Whistling, he turned and left the room, ready for a bath and clean clothes. He had things to do.

  Chapter Six

  Lucy nervously smoothed the green silk of the evening gown that she had chosen for this evening. It had a cream tulle overskirt and was one of her favorites. She was going to need all the encouragement that she could get this evening.

  Harriet sat beside her, pretty in a bright yellow dress that contrasted with her dark hair. Harriet was the type of woman who would become more striking as she aged. George sat across from them, smiling at his fiancée. They were so happy together in spite of the troubles that had preceded their engagement.

  George’s family thought George could do so much better than Harriet. They had been disdainful of Harriet’s status as the poor daughter of the dissolute Earl of Brandwine. Harriet’s father had gambled his estate away and caroused through London with nary a care for the hopes of his young daughter. An aunt had brought Harriet out for her Season and Harriet and George had met and fallen in love almost instantly. George’s mother kept throwing other young ladies at him and had finally colluded in a scheme to compromise her son so that he would not be able to marry Harriet. But luck had intervened and George had finally stood up to his mother and claimed Harriet for his own.

  Harriet reached over and clasped Lucy’s nervous fingers. “Be calm, my dear. This will all work out. My dear George has spoken to Lovell and our plan is in place.”

  Lucy smiled apprehensively at her friend. She would do anything for Harriet, but she had argued against her plan quite strenuously. Only the thought that she would need to face society for the next few weeks made her finally capitulate. The rumors were already flying about, making the incident even more exaggerated. George had heard someone say that she had knocked Lovell out with a fist to his jaw. The rumors needed to be squelched at once.

  She wished that Carlisle had not had to leave to take care of an estate matter. She would have liked to have him at her side tonight. There would be no titters in the ballroom if he were there. And then perhaps she would not have to face Aubrey or be part of Harriet’s scheme.

  The carriage jolted to a halt and Lucy straightened her spine, already girding for battle. Harriet gave her hand a quick squeeze and then they prepared to follow George out of the carriage. He handed each of them down in front of the Roth’s stairway. This was going to be a crush. People were already streaming up the stairs, past the huge baskets of flowers under the torchlight. A few women glanced at the new arrivals and then quickly turned away when they recognized Lucy. The men were more inclined to leer and Lucy suppressed the urge to roll her eyes.

  George took Harriet on his arm and led them up the stairway. Lucy followed, but she noticed that while several people greeted the couple ahead of her, no one acknowledged her at all. She lifted her head a little higher. Truly, she didn’t care about any of them and couldn’t wait until Harriet and George wed so that she could return home. But Harriet’s scheme meant that she would need to spend some time with Aubrey just to show that it was all just a misunderstanding. She grimly set her lips. It was not a misunderstanding. She did hate Lovell. She must think of him as Lovell, not Aubrey. She would endure him with icy politeness and tolerate the next few weeks. Surely they did not need to spend much time together and once the wedding was over she would never need to see him again.

  The ballroom was crowded and overheated for this May evening despite the open doors at the back of the room. Couples whirled around the dance floor and others stood in chattering groups, staring around in an effort to see and to be seen. The poor wallflowers stood in scattered clumps, hemmed in by their anxious mamas while the chaperones and dowagers sat where they had the best vantage point. It was a typical London society event and Lucy wanted to flee from the prying eyes and overly-perfumed odors. She almost turned to leave, but Harriet glanced back over her shoulder to check on her, smiling although her eyes betrayed her worry.

  Harriet's presence soothed Lucy although she did not seem as sure of her plan as she had earlier. She took a deep breath and smiled back, following them through the crowds.

  George led them over to where his friend, the Earl of Thornton was surveying the crowds. Thornton was a reserved man but not unapproachable and Lucilla liked the little she knew of him, despite him being one of Aubrey’s, rather Lovell’s friends. He was dreadfully handsome and all the young ladies swooned over him while their mamas swooned over his title and wealth. He, however, was indifferent to swooning and generally did not attend events where he might be waylaid. Like Lucy he was only here because of his friend’s upcoming nuptials.

  Thornton did not leer or give her the cut, but he did eye her with curiosity as George greeted him. Harriet gave her a nudge and Lucy remembered that he was also a part of the ploy to rehabilitate her. Harriet had made George enlist all his friends in the effort. Lucy sighed, foreseeing a long evening ahead. At least, Lovell did not appear to have arrived yet.

  Thornton nodded his head acknowledging the ladies. “Good evening, Lady Harriet, Lady Lucilla. Quite the crush tonight. Lady Roth must delight in the fact that so many have managed to attend her ball.” Lucy curtseyed and nodded, but did not bother to reply, leaving that courtesy to Harriet. She turned and surveyed the ball room, trying to appear aloof and imperious to the stares. The thought of seeing Aubrey again overwhelmed her. Perhaps he would not come despite George’s appeal. He could be no more anxious to see her again than she was to meet him.

  When George and Harriet excused themselves to dance she was left alone with Thornton. “Would you like to dance?” he asked politely, holding out his hand to take hers. Lucy nodded her assent and he led her out for a set of country dances. He was a graceful dancer and Lucy was out of practice, so she concentrated on her footsteps, thankful that the dance did not allow for much conversation.

  She was breathless and rosy from the warmth of the room and exertion of the dance when the set finished. Lovell gave her a brief smile, but did not attempt to talk with her as he led her back to where Harriet and George waited.

  “Thank you, my lord, for the dance. I fear I am a trifle out of practice at the steps.” Lovell nodded and walked away.

  “Practicing your wiles again, my dear,” a deep voice came from behind her and she stiffened. The hot, hard body came up too close to her and she tried to step away. He had hold of her arm and kept her pinned to his side in full view of anyone looking in the ballroom.

&n
bsp; The Earl of Rathburn chuckled when she hissed, “Let me go.”

  “I think not.” his voice was velvet. “I have waited to see you return to society. We have unfinished business.” His hot breath blew over her ear as he leaned in so no one else would hear and Lucy shivered in distaste. She lifted her dancing slipper and brought it down on his instep, trying to get him to release her without making more of a scene.

  Harriet looked horrified, her plan going awry before her eyes. George’s face looked determined as he started to step forward, but then he stopped and blew out a breath in relief.

  Chapter Seven

  “Please release the lady, Rathburn. I believe that this is my dance.” Lucy closed her eyes in equal parts relief and dismay that Aubrey had finally appeared. Rathburn hesitated, but then let go of her arm and stepped back.

  “Lady Lucilla and I were just recalling old times.” Rathburn was cool, his eyes narrowed as he inspected the newcomer. “Pleasant times as I recollect, eh, my dear?”

  Lucilla shivered at the endearment. She wondered how she had ever thought Rathburn attractive. True, she had been in despair during her first season and he seemed to be the only one interested in her. She didn’t know of his reputation or how he had gambled his wealth away so that he needed a rich heiress to wife. She had been naive to think that he would ever be able to replace Aubrey in her affections and shocked when he displayed his true colors.

  Lucilla opened her eyes to see Aubrey standing in front of her, his hand out as he claimed her for the dance. She stepped forward, all thought of her feelings for him gone in her haste to escape from Rathburn. He took her gloved hand and a dart of heat ran up her arm. He apparently did not feel it as he pulled her forward to the dance floor. And of all the luck, it was a waltz that the orchestra started to play.

  He took her in his arms and another shiver ran through Lucy’s body, but this time it was not from revulsion. She noticed the shocked glances from the people around them, but did not have time to react as he whirled her away. They had never danced the waltz in their time together, only country dances at local parties. Lucy bit her lip, trying to collect herself, trying hard to ignore the closeness of the hard male body holding her.

  “I apologize if I interrupted a tete-a-tete, but I have only just arrived.” His voice was brandy-smooth, just as she remembered and Lucy looked up to see his handsome face set. His eyes narrowed as he studied her. “Lady Harriet seemed to indicate that my presence was necessary now, not later as she had originally wished.”

  Lucy flushed, reminded that he was only here to help to dissipate the scandal that she had caused. He had a small bruise on his face where she had hit him and she was struck by the urge to reach up and soothe the injury. She tensed, wondering that she had fallen back so swiftly into her old ways and gathered herself.

  “Lord Rathburn is an old acquaintance, but not a welcome one. I appreciate your help in the matter, especially after the way I treated you yesterday.” Lucy took a deep breath and continued. “My lord, I must apologize for my behavior yesterday. I mistook you for someone else and as a lady…” she faltered as his grip tightened.

  “Lucy, you would never mistake me for anyone else. And I deserved that slap and more.” His eyes glinted as her mouth dropped open in shock. When Harriet had come up with this mad scheme that Lovell escort her to several events until the gossip died down, Lucy had refused adamantly. Once Harriet had convinced her that it was the only path to the salvation of their reputations she had finally agreed. She expected that Aubrey had only acceded because of George and that he would be as unwilling as her to be together. But he sounded sincere.

  “You look lovely tonight,” Aubrey said and it was as if he had tipped a bucket of ice water over her. Lucy looked away, her gaze cool and her lips tight.

  “What is the matter?” Aubrey had not missed the tenseness of her body. It was a delight to hold her so close again, breathing in her scent, and he feasted his eyes like a starving man at a banquet.

  “I see that you have not changed,” Lucy’s voice was stern. She kept her face turned away and Aubrey pulled her a little closer, trying to gain her attention again.

  “What does that mean?” Her attitude amused him. But in truth, Aubrey was so relieved to be holding her back in his arms that he did not care if he irritated her right now. He had a lot to make up for and did not expect instant forgiveness. That she had gone along with the plan he had proposed to Harriet and George gave him some hope for eventual exoneration, but tonight was only the first step.

  When he had seen Rathburn accosting her, he had raced across the room despite the original plan to dance with her later in the evening. Aubrey had managed to remain calm, though he would not speak to the outcome if Rathburn had not released her so easily. He would have made an even greater scandal in that case. But the fact that he had come to her rescue would confuse the gossips and mollify any further rumors.

  Lucy shrugged and did not answer him, but tried to pull away and put a little more distance between them. He held her firmly against him and she looked up, her eyes glittering with anger.

  “My lord, please, this is unseemly,” she hissed.

  “Yet we have been closer than this,” he whispered back and it pleased him to see the blush creep up her neck. Her eyes narrowed and she tried to pull a hand away from him.

  “No, no, Lucy.” He was laughing, so giddy to hold her in his arms again. “No hitting me again, even if I do deserve it.”

  She glared and looked away, determined not to give him any further reaction. It hurt her to the heart to see Aubrey laughing and so pleased with himself after all this time. She had hoped that he had spent the last five year in misery and instead it appeared that he had not a care in the world.

  “Where did this sudden propensity for hitting come from anyway? I don’t recall a partiality to bodily harm from you in the past.” He was teasing her.

  “Perhaps I have been hitting every gentleman I have met in the last five years. How would you know?” She was proud that she was so collected.

  He sobered instantly. “Indeed, I would not blame you if you took me as an example of a gentleman.”

  She looked up again as he swept her past another couple. “Why all the apologies, Lord Lovell? Surely you have no reason for regret.”

  He almost stumbled. “Ah, Lucy, I have all the regrets in the world.”

  She tried to pull away again, her lips pressed together and two hot flashes of color on each cheekbone. He would not let her go, but Aubrey realized that he needed to rein in his blithe spirits. He was sincere, but she had no way to know that. She only knew that he had left without a word of explanation and it was late in the day to clarify his actions. It would be better to be casual and gradually work his way back into her good graces.

  “And how is your brother? I heard that he had married,” Aubrey thought to change the topic but he winced, thinking he should not have mentioned marriage.

  Apparently, Lucy was not so sensitive. “He is quite well. He married Lady Anne Grey, daughter to the Earl of Warwick. They are awaiting the arrival of their first child. Otherwise, they would have accompanied me to Town.” Lucy seemed to have calmed and was coolly looking about the ballroom as they danced. Aubrey could not detect any more temper or animosity.

  “And you are staying with Lady Harriet until the wedding?” This was a bit inquisitive and personal, but Aubrey wanted to keep her talking.

  “No, I am not.”

  “Are you staying at Richard’s townhouse then?” Aubrey was definitely over the line now, but he was curious. Lucy did not seem to have a chaperone and it would be a scandal for her to be staying at the townhouse on her own. But Wakefield’s townhouse was next to his own and he hadn’t noticed any activity. Indeed, the knocker was still off the door.

  “It is none of your business, my lord.” Lucilla was avoiding an answer and Aubrey decided to move on. She had piqued his curiosity, but he could take the subject up with George later. Meanwhile,
he wanted to enjoy the sensation of holding Lucy in his arms once again.

  “I am suitably chastised, Lady Lucilla.” She looked up, surprised at his teasing tone, then rolled her eyes and looked away. He cleared his throat and tried again. “I understand that we are to go riding tomorrow. Aversley says that he will provide a mount for you.”

  She licked her lips nervously and a bolt of lust so intense hit Aubrey that he almost leaned down to trace her lips with his own tongue. He straightened and tried to regain control of his unruly body. Lucy did not seem to notice, but continued to dance, still looking around the room.

  “Yes, Harriet spoke to me already. I suppose there is no help for it.” She sounded bitter and Aubrey’s lust turned abruptly to dismay.

  “Lady Harriet’s plan is a good one, Lucy, and it will help the gossip mongers move on to something else. Though I think you should try smiling at me, even if you don’t want to.” Aubrey gave her waist a little squeeze and pasted a gentle smile on his face.

  “Don’t try to cozen me, my lord.” But Lucy did give him a smile, even if it looked brittle. “And I did not give you leave to address me by given name.”

  “Certainly, Lady Lucilla, I know better than to try to pull the wool over your eyes. I thought only to remind you of our goal here.” Aubrey’s face became serious. “Aversley is my friend and I do want him and Lady Harriet to be happy. And that includes not causing a scandal before their wedding day. We were good friends once, Lady Lucilla, and I would hope that we can be friends once again, for the sake of our friends if nothing else.

 

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