Marriage by Design: Book 1
Breaking
the
Rules
Ruth Ann Nordin
This is a work of fiction. The events and characters described herein are imaginary and are not intended to refer to specific places or living persons. The opinions expressed in this manuscript are solely the opinions of the author and also represent the opinions or thoughts of the publisher.
Breaking the Rules
All Rights Reserved.
Copyright 2020 Ruth Ann Nordin
V1.0
Design Credit: Images and Cover Art Illustration by Period Images, Pi Creative Lab and MMuse-28. Cover Text, Logo, and Branding by Ruth Ann Nordin.
This book may not be reproduced, transmitted, or stored in whole or in part by any means including graphic, electronic, or mechanical without expressed written consent of the publisher/author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Epilogue
More Books in the Series
Books in the Marriage by Scandal Series
All Books by Ruth
Before reading this book:
I recommend reading The Earl’s Inconvenient Wife before reading this book. That is where you can find Miss Lilly Lowell and Mr. Roger Morris’ backstory. If you don’t already have it, The Earl’s Inconvenient Wife is free at your preferred retailer.
This book takes place between the events of The Earl’s Inconvenient Wife and A Most Unsuitable Earl in the Marriage by Scandal Series. So Lord Edon and Mr. Christopher Robinson are NOT married at this point in the Regency timeline.
To see the chronological order of all my Regency books, click here: https://ruthannnordinauthorblog.com/regency-timeline/
Chapter One
November 1813
Miss Lilly Lowell watched as Mr. Morris danced with a petite brunette. Lilly waved the fan in front of her face despite the fact that she wasn’t hot. Given the open windows, time of year, and the fact that she hadn’t danced in twenty minutes, she was cool. But she didn’t know what else to do since she was hiding from as many people as possible.
Not too long ago, she would have endeavored to be the center of attention. She had loved it when gentlemen lined up to dance with her. She had even loved it when they competed to talk to her. This evening, however, she was sticking to the edge of the ballroom.
It wasn’t her habit to hide. That was her sister’s tendency. Claire claimed all the activity made her feel dizzy. As a result, Claire preferred small social gatherings.
Never in a million years did Lilly think she would act like her sister. She twirled the blonde strands of her wig around one of her fingers. She should be out there dancing. She should be laughing and talking. She shouldn’t be standing at the side of the room like a wallflower!
She snapped the fan shut and held it out to her mother. “The next dance is about to begin. Will you hold this for me?”
Her mother took it. “Are you feeling better?”
Lilly hesitated. She almost forgot she’d told her mother she’d had a headache in order to get her to agree to let her stop dancing for a while. Her mother and father were getting anxious to see her marry. She was in her second year of looking for a husband. Her time was quickly running out. Truth be told, she was just as anxious as they were.
She hadn’t married her first Season when Mr. Morris proposed because she’d believed someone better would come along. This year, she’d found a titled gentleman who had taken an interest in her, but he turned out to be a reprobate. By the time she came to her senses, Mr. Morris had turned his attention to other ladies.
Blinking back the tears in her eyes, she lifted her chin and squared her shoulders back. If there was one thing she’d never do, it was let anyone know she was weak.
She skirted around a few people as she made her way to Mr. Morris. She could do this. She’d spoken with him many times. They had plenty in common. He could make her laugh. Just as he was making the lady who was dancing with him laugh.
She resisted the urge to clench her teeth. She had to act casual. No one must know she was upset to see him with another lady.
“Miss Lowell!”
She almost bumped into the gentleman who jumped out in front of her. “Pardon me, Lord Valentine. I didn’t see you approaching me.”
He offered a bow and smiled. “A lady as beautiful as you doesn’t need to watch where she’s going. The fault was all mine. I should have been watching where I was going.”
She glanced at Mr. Morris. The dance was almost over. He would be moving on to another partner in another minute.
“I didn’t realize you were here this evening,” Lord Valentine continued. “I’m used to seeing you in the center of the ball. You must have just arrived.”
She decided not to respond. There was no need for him, or anyone else for that matter, to find out she’d been hiding like a lovesick fool. She’d never live down the shame of it.
“Would you like to share the next dance with me?” Lord Valentine asked.
Her gut twisted in dread. She hated it when gentlemen asked her to dance. She couldn’t say no. She was made to be polite at all times. Even when she didn’t want to dance with one of them, she had to say yes or risk the ridicule of the Ton.
She glanced at Mr. Morris.
“Miss Lowell?”
She forced her attention back to Lord Valentine, noting the hopeful spark in his eyes. She’d seen that spark many times over the past two years. She used to see it when Mr. Morris looked at her. But the last time he looked at her, that spark had been gone. And it had cut her to the very core of her being.
But she had to dance with Lord Valentine. Polite society deemed it so. There were rules to follow, and this was one of them.
The dance came to an end. As much as it pained her, Lilly accepted Lord Valentine’s hand and went to the middle of the room with him. They passed Mr. Morris. If he noticed her, he didn’t give any indication of it. He used to always make it obvious that he saw her whenever she was nearby. This time, he just went over to another lady and asked her to dance.
Lilly blinked back more tears. She couldn’t let anyone know how angry she was. She didn’t blame him. He had every right to spurn her. This was all her fault. She was the one who rejected him. What else could she expect?
The music started up, and she forced her attention to the dance. She had to act as if she didn’t have a care in the world. The task wasn’t easy. Not when she was acutely aware that Mr. Morris wasn’t far from her.
“Have you done anything of interest since we last talked?” Lord Valentine asked.
When did she last talk to him? It was hard to remember which gentleman she’d talked to and when. There were so many of them. After a while, they all became a blur. The only one who stood out was Mr. Morris. But then, he had been the only one who’d ever been sincerely interested in her.
Deciding to play it safe, she opted to stick with what she had done that day. “I’m afraid things have been boring. I joined my mother on a couple of errands.”
“What kind of errands?”
“Mostly shopping.” Her mother had been convi
nced buying a new gown would soothe Lilly’s heartache, but she’d been wrong. The hole was still there in her heart.
“That sounds enjoyable.”
Since he expected her to say it was, she offered the obligatory smile and teased, “What lady doesn’t like to shop?”
He laughed. “You’re such a delight. I can’t think of any other lady that has the wit you do. Most would argue that they aren’t spendthrifts. You not only admit it, but you joke about it.”
“I see no point in taking things too seriously.”
“I find that refreshing. I have lots of money. I don’t mind it if my future wife were to go shopping. She would be at liberty to do so whenever she wished.”
He winked at her, and she hid the urge to run back to her mother. This wasn’t good. He was pretty much coming out and telling her he wanted to marry her.
“You could have your pick of ladies, my lord,” she said in an attempt to steer his attention off of her. “In fact, my friend was talking about you the other day.”
She noted the surprise in his eyes as he asked, “Which friend?”
“Miss Stewart.”
She bit her tongue. That was the wrong friend to direct him to. She just remembered Emilia Stewart had said Lord Valentine’s nose was so big that it was a wonder he didn’t slam it in a book when he was done reading. She should have gone with Miss Kitty Farrow. Kitty had said he was rather bookish but gentlemen had bigger faults than that. Yes, Kitty would have been a better choice.
“I didn’t realize Miss Stewart fancied me,” Lord Valentine said. “I had a dance with her last week, but I was under the impression she had no interest in me.”
Lilly gave him a smile, afraid that if she said anything else, she would inadvertently make things worse. She couldn’t very well come out and tell him he was right. That would crush his spirits.
“I don’t suppose she’s here this evening, is she?” he asked.
“No.” Thankfully, she was not! All she needed was for him to run over to Emilia and start gushing over her. “My friend had to go to a dinner party with her family.” Hoping to turn his attention away from Emilia, she asked, “Have you done anything of interest since we last talked?”
“As a matter of fact, I have,” he replied. “I managed to secure an investment that I think will be highly profitable years from now. Mr. Jasper is certain it’s one of the best investment opportunities in London.”
He went on to explain the investment in surprising detail. She was relieved. At least she’d gotten his attention off of Emilia. With any luck, he would forget all about her, and this would be the end of it. Oh Lord, let this be the end of it. The last thing she wanted was for him to pursue a courtship with Emilia because of what she’d said. Perhaps, however, she’d given him the boost of confidence he needed to pursue other ladies, and if that was the case, the slip would be worth it.
When the dance came to an end, she breathed a sigh of relief. Now she wouldn’t accidentally say anything else about Emilia. She offered him a goodbye then quickly wove her way through the group to find Mr. Morris. She found him just as he left his last dance partner. What luck! She hurried over to him before he could find another lady to dance with.
“Mr. Morris,” she called out in the tone of voice he’d once told her made him feel special.
He turned in her direction.
“You’ve been a sly one,” she teased. “You haven’t talked to me all night. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’ve been avoiding me.”
“You’re right. I have been avoiding you,” he replied.
She blinked in surprise. She had suspected he had decided to stop pursuing her, but she didn’t think he was actually avoiding her. “Why, that’s silly,” she said with a giggle to cover up her uncertainty. “Because of you, I managed to avoid a terrible marriage. You did that because you love me.”
“Loved you, Miss Lowell. That’s past tense.”
He looked behind her, and out of instinct, she glanced over her shoulder and saw the pretty brunette in his line of sight.
“Good evening, Miss Lowell,” he said then went around her so that he could go to the brunette.
Lilly couldn’t believe it. She’d been rejected by Mr. Morris, the one gentleman she thought would never refuse her anything. She watched in shock as he asked the lady to dance. Several times over the past two years, he’d told her that he could never be happy with anyone but her.
He’s angry. You spurned him too many times. He’s not going to let you hurt him again.
Who said she was going to hurt him again? She had no such intention. She’d seen the error of her ways.
With renewed determination, she marched over to him and tapped his shoulder. He stopped speaking with the brunette and turned to face her, his eyes wide in surprise.
“If you require me to apologize, I apologize,” Lilly said, ignoring the startled expression on the brunette’s face. “I was wrong to say no when you proposed. I’ve come to my senses, and I realize you are the only one for me. I will marry you.”
The corner of his mouth twitched, and she couldn’t make out whether he was happy or not. She’d never seen the corner of his mouth twitch before.
“The proposal is no longer being offered,” he said then turned back to the other lady.
Lilly stared at his back. Had she heard him right? Had he just told her he wasn’t going to marry her? She had been sure if she came out and said she would marry him, all would be forgiven and they would be together.
He used to paint a picture of their future together. He’d talk of walks at Hyde Park, trips to the theatre, teaching their children to ride horses… And now he was telling her none of that was going to happen?
“Are you going to dance, or do you plan to take up space on the floor?” someone asked her.
Without looking at the person, she headed for her mother. She was done with this ball. She didn’t have any use for being here anymore. The only reason she even came here was to talk to Mr. Morris, and that hadn’t gone the way she’d expected.
Swallowing the lump in her throat, she focused on one of the chairs at the side of the room so she wouldn’t break down and cry. Once she was at her townhouse, she could cry then. But she must not do it in public for the entire Ton to see.
Never cry in front of another person. All crying must be done in private. Never let someone know you can be weak.
Pretending her life wasn’t over, she reached her mother and made small talk with one of her mother’s friends before she managed to talk her mother into going home.
***
“The only way to stop thinking about a lady is to find another one,” Aaron Henry, the Earl of Northton, said the next day at White’s.
Mr. Roger Morris knew his friend was right. He only wished it was easy. It wasn’t that he couldn’t find another lady. He had been granted permission to visit three of them in the past two weeks. Last evening at the ball, two seemed interested in him. They had indicated he was welcome to ask to call on them.
He just wished he wanted to pursue a courtship with one of them. Any of them. He didn’t care who the lady was. If he could just acquire a hint of interest in one of them, he would pursue her with all of his heart.
But he couldn’t let Miss Lowell go. For two years, he’d been her most ardent suitor. He’d followed her around like a pathetic dog at its owner’s heels. If she was going to be at the park, he would arrange it so that he was there at the same time. If she was going to a ball, he would talk her chaperone into putting him down for two dances on her card. If he happened to see her at the market, he would go up to her and engage in a quick conversation with her.
In short, he’d been nothing but a fool. And everyone had known it but him. It was amazing he wasn’t the laughingstock of London.
He slouched further in the chair.
“Surely, there must be a lady somewhere in London who can replace Miss Lowell,” Aaron said.
Roger wanted to think so, but if
she existed, he didn’t know where to find her. He ran his hand through his dark-blond hair in frustration.
“There has to be a lady out there who can appreciate what you have to offer,” Aaron insisted. “Miss Lowell doesn’t take time to think of anyone but herself. You deserve someone who will love you for who you are instead of what she wants you to be.”
“I know. When she told me she wanted to marry me, I told her the proposal is no longer good.”
Aaron straightened up in his chair. “You didn’t tell me this. When did it happen?”
“It happened last evening at the ball.” He shrugged. “Why would I tell you? Nothing of consequence came of it. I’m not going to marry her.”
Even if he had to spend the rest of his life in heartache, he was far better off avoiding marriage to someone who had rejected him. It was only his love for her that had compelled him to stop her from marrying Lord Hedwrett. Had Lord Hedwrett been a decent person, he would have stayed out of it. But he couldn’t bring himself to watch her marry Lord Hedwrett. She might have greatly hurt him, but he didn’t want to see her suffer. A lifetime was too long to spend with someone who was like Lord Hedwrett. The gentleman was notorious for his ruthless behavior.
Aaron settled back in his chair. “You’re right. Telling her no was the best way to handle it.”
“It was.”
Even if it had cut Roger through to his core, it had been necessary. Logic had to win over feelings, didn’t it?
Maybe someday, he would be able to put Miss Lowell completely behind him. That day wasn’t today, but he had no doubt that sooner or later, he would wake up, think of her, and no longer wish things had been different. All he had to do was wait out this period in his life.
“Sometimes I envy you,” Roger told his friend. “Your decision to avoid courting until you’re thirty was probably smart.”
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