by Lara Norman
The alarm went off while he laid awake. It was not going to be a good day. He forced himself to shower, to eat, to put on his boots and leave the house. His head was fuzzy, his eyes gritty. He had to focus especially hard to make the drive to work. He was alone for an hour that morning and went about flipping on the lights and unlocking the bay doors. There was no rain, but it made Grant think of the day Alex had come in and started all of this. The outrageous way she’d gone down on him in the waiting room without even asking if he was okay with it had stunned him. It was what he wanted, the exact thing he thought he was looking for in a woman. It was exciting to put his hands on her, to slip them inside her panties and feel how wet she’d become with his cock in her mouth.
He squeezed his eyes closed and tried not to picture that encounter. It was not as easy as he thought; everything reminded him of Alex. Grant walked out of the waiting room after turning on the light and began opening the bay doors. He half expected to see her pull up in her car, to step out and demand he do crazy things to her. But she was in school on a Tuesday morning and he wouldn’t see her, which was most likely for the best. He needed to get himself together and figure out what he wanted before he spoke to her again. It would do neither of them any good if he was still screwed up inside the next time she called wanting to see him.
He heard an engine idling and glanced over his shoulder in mild curiosity. Shock would not even adequately describe his feelings as he watched Alex pull in to the bay. What the hell was she doing there, and what the hell was he supposed to do now?
She stepped out of the car in a knee-length skirt and a blouse, her hair in a bun and tall heels on her feet. That was the style of outfit that made her look like a rich girl to him. “Hey, Grant!”
He couldn’t focus on anything except for the buzzing between his ears.
She walked up to him, head tilting to the side when he didn’t move. “Why do you look like you saw a ghost?”
He blinked. “I didn’t expect to see you. I thought you’d be at work.”
Alex grinned. “I have training this morning, and I don’t have to be there for an hour. I thought I’d drop by.”
“Oh.”
Her smile faltered. “What’s wrong?”
Grant made an effort to smile. “I didn’t sleep last night.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.” She stared around at the empty shop before looking back at Grant with a raised eyebrow. “You’re alone.”
“Only for an hour.” He felt it, the overwhelming attraction for Alex that bubbled just under the surface.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?”
He was, and he was pissed at himself for it. “Not up here.”
She grinned again. “Where, then?”
Grant took her hand and led her to the stairs. They had to be out of sight of anyone who might come in. He couldn’t take the same risk that they did the last time, but the thought of Alex being in the greasy, dirty area down the stairs known as the pit made him feel like shit. She was better than that.
“Are you sure?” he asked as they came to a standstill.
“Grant, I think about you all the time.” Alex cupped his crotch and moved closer to him, her head tipped up.
Grant couldn’t think straight when she fondled his cock. He kissed her, groaning at the first contact of their lips. He put his arms around her shoulders as if he was strong enough to meld her to him. Whenever they came together, it was an explosive feeling in his chest, his stomach, and absolutely in his cock. She lit him up from somewhere deep inside and he could only beg her for more. He shifted her until they were moving, stumbling back into a set of shelves. The area down there was cramped and smelled strongly of motor oil. He thrust his hands into her hair, dislodging pins that they would probably never recover. The weight of it settled over his arms as it fell from the updo. As he angled her head to kiss her better, she was working on his button and zipper. She made a garbled sound when Grant bit her lower lip as she pulled his cock free and encased it in her palm. He let her lead them, barely noticing what she was doing as he continued to kiss her. He couldn’t stop himself from tasting her, nibbling and sucking her lips alternately.
“Grant, fuck me. Fuck me now.”
He had to break the kiss he was so enjoying, seeing that she’d raised her skirt and wasn’t wearing any underwear. He groaned at the sight of her glistening lips. “Jesus, you came prepared.”
Grant took hold of her hips and hoisted Alex so that she was braced against the shelf behind her. He slid inside her smoothly and they both let out a sigh. Something fell off the shelf as he rammed into her. Her body was trembling, her breaths catching in her throat, and her eyes had rolled back in her head. Grant was focusing on holding her up and not breaking the entire set of shelves. She felt so good, so fucking good, and he dug his fingers into her thighs as he felt the tightening that signaled his orgasm. In reaction, Alex tightened her legs around his waist and held onto his shoulders for dear life. He was too far gone to worry about her coming, making it a surprise when she let out a short scream and fell apart in his arms. The quaking of her limbs and pulsing in her pussy sent him over the edge into bliss.
“You’re dirty,” he said as he held her.
“You’re dirty,” she repeated. “That was naughty.”
“No, I mean I got dirt on your clothes.” He let her down, waiting until she was steady on her feet before he let her go and fixed his pants.
“It’ll be okay.” She kissed him quickly. “I have to run. I’ll call you later.”
Grant watched her ass as she headed up the stairs in stilettos and wondered if he’d ever be able to keep his hands off her.
Chapter 14
It was only about twenty minutes after Alex left that Josh and Larry came to work. Grant was up top working under the hood of a car when they arrived, and he couldn’t look the other two in the face. He spent the rest of the day avoiding speaking to anyone and simply doing his best to focus on his work. His emotions about Alex disconcerted him. Love, lust, long term or short, he didn’t know what to do anymore. He thought he was heading in the right direction with her, and he was comfortable over the weekend at her place. He supposed the comfort was what spooked him.
The better part of two weeks passed, and he avoided calling Alex. He didn’t answer the one time she called, but he did text her to tell her he was busy. He was trying not to be a complete dick, but he wondered if he was failing at his efforts.
Alex was slightly concerned when Grant didn’t want to talk. They had spent little time on the phone before, though, so she tried to put it out of her mind. They were more of a booty call type of couple, and she’d tried to make peace with that. After all, it was what she’d agreed to do. Grant had been very upfront from the first time she’d flirted, and she had no one to blame but herself if she was getting hurt while trying to change the course of their relationship. She thought about it all the time when she wasn’t at work. She couldn’t seem to shut off the over thinking part of her brain that wanted to analyze every action either of them had taken. She figured she’d better spend time with her friends to keep herself busy or she’d wind up obsessing.
Carmela picked her up, and they met Hailey at a restaurant near the school. Alex, for one, planned on getting drunk. She didn’t like the way she was so preoccupied with every move Grant made. She promised herself she wouldn’t act that way and then she did exactly that.
“Hey!” Carmela greeted Hailey when they were shown to the table.
“Hi, Carm.”
“Hi.” Alex leaned down and hugged Hailey before taking her seat. “How were classes today?”
Hailey shrugged. “Not too bad, honestly. I had a pretty good week overall. How about you?”
“I had to attend another development class on Tuesday, so my week was weird, anyway.” She paused when the waiter came by and took their drink orders. Alex was ready to swim in a few margaritas. “Other than that, my students have been well-behaved this month
so I guess it qualified as good.”
“And yet you needed a girls’ night out,” Carmela said. “Why?”
The waiter came back with waters and bread for the table. Once they’d placed their orders, they resumed their conversation.
“Was it something outside of work, then?” Hailey asked.
Alex tried to pretend she didn’t know what Hailey was talking about. “That’s fine, too.”
“Liar.”
Alex glared at her cousin. “Am not.”
“Look, I know you think you can pretend I don’t know you as well as I do, but I can see that something is going on.” Carmela leveled her with a look. “You’re antsy and your shoulders are all hunched.”
“Whatever, bitch.”
Their drinks were dropped off and Alex went in deep. Carmela raised a brow and sipped on her soda. She’d promised to be the designated driver for Alex.
“Even I can see that something is troubling you,” Hailey said softly.
Alex frowned. “Great, so I’m transparent?”
“Other than the margarita guzzling? You’re avoiding eye contact.”
Alex stared at Carmela. “There you go. Better?”
“And you’re being snippy.”
“Okay! It’s Grant. Happy now?” Alex pushed at her silverware for something to do with her hands that didn’t involve throwing her drink in Carmela’s face.
“What is he doing now?” Hailey asked.
“Or not doing. What?” Carmela said when Alex glared at her.
“It’s complicated,” she muttered.
“It’s always complicated when you’re a lovesick fool. Is he leaving you horny?”
“Fuck, no.”
Carmela sighed. “Then what? Do I have to pull it out of you?”
“He’s pulling away from me after the night we spent on Saturday. He doesn’t want to be with me, he just wants a convenient—”
“Ladies,” the waiter said as he approached with their food. “Can I get you any refills?”
“No, thank you,” Hailey answered. The other two sat silently as he passed out their plates.
“So, a convenient lay?” Hailey prompted when he walked off.
Carmela rolled her eyes. “Yeah, I’m sure that was what she was about to say.”
“Actually, it is. He was so open with me last weekend.” Alex picked up her fork and pushed her food around. “He talked about his life a little more than usual, he asked me about myself. And then he said he didn’t want to leave on Sunday evening. I heard nothing from him on Monday, so I went to see him at the shop last Tuesday morning. He was alone, and we . . .”
“Oh, you’re making me jealous,” Carmela said in a throaty voice as she fanned her face.
“Yeah. Well.” Alex took a bite, but she wasn’t focused on the food. “I haven’t heard anything from him since except for a text telling me he was busy.”
“Ooh, damn. That sucks.” Carmela nudged Alex’s drink closer to her.
Alex took another big sip. “It does.”
They took a few minutes to eat without talking. Hailey was the more compassionate of the two, but Carmela felt sorry for her, too.
“So when I said you should walk away before he changed you or made you miserable, you ignored me.”
“How do I walk away when I’m so far in?”
“Babe, you’re only in lust. Trust me.” Carmela pointed her fork at Alex.
“If you say so.”
Alex had another margarita before she called it quits and had Carmela take her home. She was tempted to call Grant, but she knew it was the alcohol talking. She didn’t want to be his last-minute boredom cure. She didn’t want to be his fix because he’d decided to change up his life. That wasn’t fair to her. She thought she deserved more, but it didn’t seem that he thought the same. He was using her, plain and simple.
***
Grant was going out of his mind. He sprawled out on the couch, draining his third beer. He didn’t want to think anymore, not about Alex, or his feelings, or anything else. He hated that he’d strung her along and was now ready to dump her and steer clear of all women. Even though he’d told her ahead of time what he expected, he didn’t think it was fair to her to hold her to it. Maybe that wasn’t the brightest decision. He didn’t know what was the brightest decision.
His phone rang, and he glanced at the screen. He picked it up as soon as he saw who it was. “Reagan!”
“Hey, G. What are you up to?”
“Just hanging out at home.” He sat up and scrubbed his hand through his hair.
“No hot date on a Friday night?” she teased.
“Ugh. No.”
“Uh oh, that doesn’t sound good. Are you okay?”
He heard the concern in her voice and it made him feel like an even bigger asshole. “I’m fine. I was seeing this woman casually, but it felt awkward so I haven’t seen her in almost two weeks.”
“What felt awkward?”
“The casual part. You know me. But I made it clear I didn’t want a relationship, and I think she’s changed her mind about it.” He rubbed his face and shifted on the cushion.
“There’s nothing wrong with casual every once in a while, but don’t you want to give her a chance? There must be something about her that you like.”
“I do like her. It’s hard to explain, Ray. I wanted to get out of my comfort zone, to stop being boring and predictable. I told her I wasn’t looking for long-term commitments, but it didn’t stick. I’m repeating my same old pattern.”
Reagan sighed over the phone. “I can tell you this. I wanted to change my pattern, too. That’s how I came to be with Hudson. It caused me a lot of heartache to chase something different. It was when I realized that I could be myself and have him, too, that I became happy. Content with my life. Does that make sense?”
“I guess.” He groaned at the thought of Reagan and Hudson together. “So I should give her a try? Go back to being a stick in the mud?”
“If she’s going to make you happy, why do you care that someone might call you a stick in the mud? Who makes these decisions, anyway?”
“I can’t believe my baby sister is giving me love life advice.” He grinned and wished he could hug her.
“Yeah, well. I was actually calling about Thanksgiving. Where would you like to have it?”
“Are you able to travel? Because I only have Thursday off this year.”
“I should be able to. I’ll double check with Hudson. He’s been avoiding his parents because they don’t like me.” She laughed.
“They’re idiots, clearly.” That was one thing he could agree with Hudson about—that and his love and affection for Reagan.
“Clearly. I’m perfect,” she said on a chuckle.
“This sounds corny, but you’re perfect for him, sweet pea.”
She made a sniffling sound. “I love you.”
“You better not cry, or I’ll cry.”
“No, I’m not. I’ll get back to you about Thanksgiving.”
“Okay. I love you, baby girl.”
“Love you, too. Bye.”
Grant stared at his phone after she’d hung up. Reagan was way too smart for her own good. Could he possibly do what he always did, what he wanted to do, and would that make him happy in the long run? Why did it feel as though he had to be brave in order to be happy? It should be simple, easy. A no-brainer. Instead, he was sitting there chewing up his thoughts and swirling them around and making it harder on himself. Call Alex. Ask for a date. Explain his feelings. The end.
He knew it wasn’t that simple. They would need to start over. Begin again. They would go on a date, yes, and they would have to get to know each other. He hadn’t told her very much about his life growing up, about his struggles to raise Reagan or how much he’d worried he would fail and she would end up in the system. Foster care wouldn’t have worked out for him. He was too old and would have phased out as soon as he entered. He would have been separated from Reagan, and he could never
have stood that. He had done the best he could with their situation, and he liked to think it had worked out in the long run. These were the things he needed to tell Alex. it explained who he was at his core.
It was time to give her a call.
Chapter 15
Grant called her Saturday morning. She wasn’t expecting it; she’d given up on thinking that they were going to have a chance at any kind of happiness. She was hung over from the night before, but it was fairly mild. She’d stopped after the second drink at the restaurant, choosing to go to bed when she got home. After some coffee and Advil, she didn’t feel absolutely terrible. By the time her phone rang, she was pretty much human again.