by Brindi Quinn
“No! Stop. I told you-”
But I was interrupted when he pushed me down by my shoulders into a pile of blankets.
“N-Nyte?”
He leaned over me, face serious and chest expanding with shorter-than-usual breaths.
“I told you,” I persisted in a trembling whisper. “I won’t let you-”
Nyte kissed away the words. He kissed them all, each and every one, and when there were none remaining, he pulled his face and body away from me slightly.
“I love you, Aura Telmacha Rosh.”
My chest exploded, and in the aftermath, a gulp escaped me.
“I . . . I love you too, Nyte Attirb.”
“Is this all right?”
I nodded, but I wasn’t sure what I was agreeing to. Were we going to . . . ? Or did he simply mean these circumstances of sharing the tent alone? Or what?! But I couldn’t voice cries for elaboration. My heartbeat was now annoying loud in my ears, and my stomach was tumbling, and quite frankly, I wasn’t sure if it was ‘all right’.
I want you. Capture me.
But what did that mean?
He slipped his hand below my shirt and around my back and found my spine. I shivered.
Yes, I want you. Nyte, I want you.
But all at once, my heart dropped and I let out a cry.
“Ah!” Nyte pulled his hand away. “What is it?! I have hurt you?!”
“No!” I was frantic. “No, it’s not that! It’s Ardette!”
The words had escaped me untactfully, and in a flash, Nyte’s fretful face turned stern and disbelieving. “You . . . you are thinking of him? In this moment, it is that . . . that lecher you are thinking of?”
“No! I . . . I don’t know. I mean-”
Nyte shook his head, still in disbelief. “You have admitted that there is something there between the two of you, and I have tried to be patient and ignore whatever it is, but if my time with you is limited, I will no longer share your heart with him! How can you think of him when we are together?”
The disbelief turned to hurt.
“Nyte, no . . . I . . . I’m sorry. Ardette’s still in my head, and I don’t want him to hear what I’m thinking right now. I don’t want to hurt him any more than I already have!”
Nyte groaned, frustrated.
“Believe me! This isn’t an excuse, Nyte! Obviously he knows what we’re up to, but for him to actually hear the things I’m thinking about you-!”
I’d blurted it, but was immediately embarrassed.
“Things?” Nyte looked confused a moment, but when realization hit him, he tilted his head and slowly grinned. “What sort of ‘things’, Miss Havoc?”
“Ugh. Stop.”
I looked at the ground. Really smooth, Aura. Really, really smooth.
I was going to try to recover, but when I looked back up, Nyte’s grin was gone. It had been taken over by concern.
“Listen to me, Aura.” He put a knuckle under my chin and raised my face to his. “There is something that I have to voice.” He took a long breath and continued, “After I am gone, I know that you will go to him, but-”
“What? ‘Go to him’? What are you-”
“It is not necessary for you to deny it. I know that you will, and that is something that is painful, but it would be cruel for me to wish you to be alone. I want you to be happy even when I am not with you, and I comprehend that you will be happy with him, but for now, I only want you for myself. I have long told you that I am a selfish Elf, and it is something that still holds true. For now, I cannot share you with him. I will not.”
There were a few seconds of unnatural silence before the storm.
“What the hell are you talking about?” I swatted his hand from my face. “First of all, I’ve chosen you. Not him. Trust me, he’s given me plenty of opportunities to . . . ugh. And secondly, you aren’t going to die. I will go with you through the Wood of Erow, and I will marry you, so stop saying pointless things! I’ll find another way. If I’m the ‘chosen songstress’, then I’ve got to have at least a little pull somewhere, and I’m going to find it, and I’m going to exert it, okay? So stop implying that you’re taking the fall for me! It’s not going to happen!”
“No, think about what you are speaking. It is not just about you and me. This is something that affects the entire world. If I do not die for you, not only will you die, but the Divisia will not stay permanent!”
“Well, maybe it isn’t supposed to! I can’t get my head around how the Creator could will something like this! It doesn’t make sense! People dying for the sake of keeping the world separated? It just . . . it doesn’t portray His love! At all!”
Nyte rubbed his face, worn from the argument. “I know. Aura, I know. But the Creator is not the one who created steamed mekanix. It was man who did that, was it not? And with the Divisia, mankind is paying for the things it has done. It just so happens that we are the two who will suffer most for it-”
This time it was I who kissed away the words.
No matter how much I tried to convince him, he wouldn’t understand. So I’d just have to do it on my own. This was all happening exactly as I’d worried it would. That in both trying to play the martyr, we’d uproot our relationship and waste the time we had left. Whether I’d fail, causing our remaining time to grow short, or I’d succeed, granting us many more years together, ALL of our time was equally valuable. We couldn’t do this anymore. And that’s why I continued to kiss away the words, both his and mine. The argument, the debate, whatever it was, I kissed it away. And when I was done, he took over until there was only silence.
We continued to kiss in the darkness until we both fell asleep in each other’s arms.
. . .
Yet, for some reason, when I awoke, we were on opposite sides of the tent.
~
“Come here a moment, my pit.”
During breakfast, Ardette called me to his side. Feeling guilty about being unable to contain my thoughts the night before, I came without putting up a fuss.
“Yes?” I asked, wary.
He patted the ground beside him, and I obeyed, settling into the cold, grassless dirt.
“What?” I prodded. I was annoyed by those feelings of culpability that forced me into obedience.
He lowered his voice. “What I’m most interested to know, is why you called my name several times in your sleep last night. Dreaming about me, were you? Though, I suppose I shouldn’t be too happy. It sounded a bit like a nightmare . . .” Letting his voice trail off, he turned his face away slightly, but I could tell he was more than a little concerned because his eyes didn’t follow his face’s drift.
“A nightmare?” I couldn’t remember anything about a nightmare. “Huh. I was probably just mad at you about yesterday. Leftover rage, maybe?”
He raised a brow. “Yesterday?”
I sighed. “Ardette, I know it’s not your responsibility or anything, but to just watch Nyte and me suffer like that when you were one of the only people that could help? Ugh!”
“Hm. Yes, about that.”
I didn’t like the smugness of his frown, and sure enough, without warning, he plunged a shadowed fist into my stomach.
“Ungh!” It knocked the wind from me.
“Be easy with her!” hissed Scardo from across camp. He started to his feet.
“Yes, yes, don’t get your tuxedo ruffled. Just taking care of something that doesn’t concern you. Have a seat, why don’t you?”
But Scardo’s keen eyes remained locked on us.
Ardette, what’s this about?
The handsome Daem suddenly appeared sad.
What?
“Yes, I’ll miss this.” He tapped my temple with his free hand. “Hearing you this way. And I’ll also miss this.”
His shadowed hand traveled to my chest and enclosed around my heart. Then he leaned closer, cherry eyes wide and soft.
“I love you, my angel,” he said, only loud enough for me to hear.
; What are you-?
“See, this right here. Your quickening heartbeat is proof. And even if it’s only a little, it’s enough to mean something.”
He closed his eyes without removing his smoky fingers from my chest and stayed that way for too long – until I finally relaxed and my pulse lessened. At that point, he sighed deeply and finally pulled his hand out.
“There. I’ve removed the last pieces of myself from you so that should you happen to fall into ecstasy again, I won’t be able to hear your cries for help.”
“That’s just evil, Ardetto,” said a passing, eavesdropping Darch. “Selfish, selfish, selfish.”
“Selfish? Yes. But I won’t let that boy run away from his duty. And if he tries, then he’s far more selfish than I’ll ever be. And besides, I’m not interested in going through another night of the Pure Heart’s disgusting love thoughts.”
“Just because you could hear, doesn’t mean you had to listen,” I said. For good measure and because I was feeling embarrassed, I added, “Pervert.”
“Oh, I’m the pervert? Think about your little tent buddy, why don’t you? I can just imagine how awkward that was. Come hither, dearest Havoc. Let me please you with my inexperienced, lanky bod-”
“Enough!” I elbowed him.
“Heh. Still, I’m glad you protested when things went too far. I suppose I can commend you for that, at least.”
“Protested?” I didn’t remember that either.
“That’s right. Something about ‘not yet’. Well, quite bluntly, I don’t want to be listening in when ‘yet’ comes. I don’t think I could stomach it.”
Dramatic.
“Am I?” cooed Ardette.
That’s righ- “Wait, I thought you couldn’t hear my thoughts anymore!”
“I can’t. I just know you that well, you see.” He smiled provocatively. “Though I’d like to get to know you better before that uncouth son of a bitch gets to you.”
A ball of red zoomed past dangerously close to Ardette’s right horn.
“Oh, feeling powerful, are you, Elf?”
“Actually, I am. And I am looking for targets to practice upon . . . if you are interested.”
“Cousin!” scolded Rend. “What are you doing!? That was not one of the marks!”
“Good morning, Aura.” Nyte walked over and kissed my cheek.
“Morning.”
I blushed and Ardette faked a dry-heave. Nyte said nothing, but with a smirk, helped himself to one of my morningberries. Lucky for him, we’d restocked our fruit supply at Ms. Selrak’s house.
“Incredibly mature, ain’t ya, Ardette?” Grotts walked out of his tent and threw a piece of bread at the Daem. “Eat up, pervy Irvin’.”
“No thanks.” Ardette threw it back. “I’ve lost my appetite. By the by, talking like the squirrel now, are we?” He let out a too-large sigh. “And I was just getting used to this nice quiet atmosphere.”
“Which reminds me,” I said, taking advantage of the perfect opening.
“Fantastic,” said Ardette dryly. “Here we go with your questions, I take it? How delightful this early in the morning.”
I ignored him, directing my ‘delightful questions’ to anyone but the rude Daem. “So, the feather man ‘borrowed’ Kantú – that much you’ve made clear, but it’s about the only thing you’ve made clear. Now, no more dodging around, all right? I have to know the details, or I won’t be able to continue. So, who wants to explain?”
There was silence and then,
“I will oblige, Miss Heart.”
“Pfff.” Ardette rolled his eyes. “Of course you will, salamander man.”
Salamander?!
“What?” said Ardette. “I’ve heard your thoughts about him, and let me just say, you are spot on.”
I stared at the Daem blankly, trying to get a read on him. Had he really gotten out of my head? He’d said so, and he’d seemed sincere, but . . .
Scardo ignored both of us. “Kantú’s gone ahead to scout the mist,” he said.
“Unnngh.” A long, low groan escaped me.
I’d worried it was something like that, but I supposed it would’ve been stupid of me to hold the hope that he’d say something like, ‘she’s run home to safety’.
“But why?” I asked Scardo. “Why alone?”
“The Spirit of In-between said it needed a vessel that could speak because it was going to go and find someone to aid us, although it wasn’t any more specific than that.”
“Aid us?”
“Most likely something to do with this no-singing, mist-entry problem,” suggested Darch.
“Hm, maybe.” I looked out through the curtain of mist surrounding our camp. “So where exactly did they go?”
Scardo shook his head apologetically. “I fear we don’t know, Miss Heart. But the Spirit told Kantú to mark this point on the map. It is at the very border of Nor and Farrowel and most likely where it wishes us to enter the Mistlands. We are traveling in that direction to meet up with them again.”
“But how is that efficient at all? Kantú isn’t exactly . . . er . . . fast.”
“She was this time,” said Grotts, eyes wide. “Ya shoulda seen ‘er. Soon as the feather man got into ‘er body, she took off on all fours, quick as an osterflit.”
“Really?”
I couldn’t picture it, and I wouldn’t feel even the tiniest bit relieved until Kantú was back at Grotts’ side.
“Okay then,” I said. “We should probably get going, shouldn’t we? We don’t want to make them wait if they get there before us, and I’m really not keen on Kantú out there alone, even if she is with the feather man . . . No, especially if she’s with the feather man.”
Darch was now leaning on Scardo in a most awkward way, but took no notice of the hunched man’s discomfort. Grinning like a snuggling kitten, he yawned and said,
“Yeah, guess it’s about time to pack it up, isn’t it, guys?”
Scardo nodded stiffly, eager to get away from the too-close Magir.
“Sure. Alrigh’,” agreed Grotts. “I’ll grab this if you wanna get that pole over there, Nyte?”
“Not you, Cousin! While the others pack, we must continue to run drills. Again!”
“Ah-” Nyte looked from us to Rend and back to us.
“It’s okay, Nyte.” I looked up at him. “Darch and I will get the pole. Right, Darch?”
“Right-o!”
“Sorry, everyone.” Nyte tipped his head to us before returning to Rend.
Grotts proceeded to throw the breakfast canteens into his pack, allowing them to clank against whatever other metal containers his bag held, but he stopped two canteens in to waft the fog away from his face. “Ya know, this mist is depressin’, but it’s nothin’ like that time in Yh’tak. Guess we should be thankful for that, eh?”
“That’s because that mist was filled with the Feirgh’s emotions,” said Darch, raising a contemplative finger. “Just like the mist outside of Crystair was. Trust me, it’ll be a lot worse when we get to the Mistlands and actually start getting into close proximity with the creatures. I’ll be able to tell you when we’re near because their souls are the loudest-”
“Yes, yes,” interrupted Ardette. “You’ve explained it all before. Haven’t you anything useful to do?”
“Sure do! Ready to tackle that pole, Aura?”
“I think so. Wait, let me check. Yup, mentally prepared.”
I gave him a thumbs-up, and in return he gave me a great, beaming smile.
After all of the tent poles were gathered and bundled, I moved on to the top of my patch-work tent.
“Ardette, can you grab this for me?” I pointed to the other side.
“Coming, my pit. I suppose I’ll help you fold your little love shack, but only if you agree to invite me in sometime.”
“Just help, would you?” But when he was close enough, I asked, “Keeping more secrets from me?”
“Sorry, I haven’t the slightest idea what you’re talking abou
t.”
“You haven’t really left my head, have you?”
“Who knows? I’m sure you’ll think of a way to find out for sure, though, won’t you?”
“If you’re hoping I’ll offer myself to you again, it’s not going to happen. That was a desperate, one-time thin-”
“Offer yourself to him?!” blurted Nyte in a surprised sputter, even though he was on the other side of camp still practicing with Rend and shouldn’t have been able to hear us.
“Ah! N-Nyte!”
Stupid far-reaching ears! Not only that, but his inquiry had piqued the rest of the party’s interest too. The all halted what they were doing to intrude our privacy with probing stares. I tried to shrink, but Ardette happily soaked them in.
“That’s right,” he flaunted. “Was that occasion the second or the third time we kissed? I can’t remember now . . . .”
Another blast of red sizzled the dirt at Ardette’s feet.
“I hope you realize that I am missing on purpose,” called Nyte. “Not that I wish to spare you, vile Daem. I simply do not wish the air to reek of your rancid shadow.”
“Charming. Here, my pit, allow me to finish packing this for you.”
“Huh? Really?”
I’d been staring at the blistering ground, anticipating war, but I now looked up, expecting Ardette to be sneering in Nyte’s direction, yet when I followed his stare, I realized he’d somehow abruptly lost interest in the Elf, for he was now watching Darch struggle to stuff a bundle of blankets into a far-too-small pack, seemingly oblivious to Nyte’s murderous eyes upon his pale forehead.
“Yes,” he said coolly. “I’m worried what mischief Darch will get himself into if left unattended.”
“Uh. Okay.” I was glad for the chance to escape the warzone. “Hey, Darch! Here, put a couple of those in here, all right?”
But as I started away, I heard Ardette mumble,
“Vile, am I? So be it.”
I shot a quick glance back and found his eyes once again on Nyte . . . and there was a sinister grin riding his mouth.
What are you plotting, Ardette?
But he did nothing to show he could hear.
“You coming, Aura?” Darch called me back from my suspicions. “Think these two will be enough?”