by Lisa Cassidy
“It was always a possibility…” Alyx trailed off. “Why?”
“Your mother was a mage.”
Alyx instinctively tried to think back to her memories of her mother, of the time her father had told her she’d died, but as always, they remained irritatingly out of reach. Shaking her head, she concentrated on trying to recall an image, or a sound, but managed nothing more than a queer fogginess and faint headache. No matter how hard she’d tried over the years, Alyx couldn’t even remember what her mother looked like.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me that?” Betrayal crept through her.
“There was no reason for you to know, not unless you started showing mage potential.” He smiled sadly. “For many reasons, I’ve deliberately kept you away from that world. Astor ensured you never became too curious, either. I know he’s always made his work sound boring to you. I’m sorry, I truly thought it was for the best.”
Alyx frowned, going back to the start of the conversation, struggling to process what he was saying. “So, you’re sending me away? To be a mage?”
“Yes. The king has ordered it.” Momentary anger flashed across Garan’s face. “I pleaded with him not to, but I can’t gainsay my king.”
“But Astor told me once…” Alyx tried to remember her godfather’s words. “He said that mages train at a place called DarkSkull Hall, hundreds of miles to the north in Tregaya.”
“Yes.”
She was shaking her head even before he’d finished speaking. “Papa, no. I don’t want to leave my home.”
“We must all abide by our king’s commands.” Garan took a deep breath. One of his hands curled against the arm of the chair, white-knuckled. “He needs mages to help keep Rionn safe.”
“Rionn is safe! We’ve been safe for decades. I don’t like Lord-Mage Casovar, and I don’t want to be a mage.”
“Alyx…”
She stared at him. He looked lost for words, as if this were upsetting him as much as it did her, but she didn’t understand any of it. She was Lady Alyx Egalion, not a mage. She belonged here, in Alistriem. There was a strange sinking sensation in her chest, emotion old and familiar. She’d felt this sense of loss before, she knew, but that made no sense either.
“No,” she burst out, tears pricking her eyes. “I’m not going. I don’t want to leave home.” Or Cayr, she thought. Not him, not now.
“I know, but you’ll be able to come back home to live once your training is finished. It seems horrible now, but this could be good for you.” Garan squeezed her hands tightly.
“I don’t have any mage powers, this is ridiculous!” Alyx yanked her hands from his and scrambled to her feet. “Casovar is making this up to get rid of me.”
“Listen to yourself, Alyx. Why would he want to do that?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “I’m your daughter, I belong here at court.”
“We don’t have any choice. I’ve spoken at length with the king but he’s resolute on this. Lord-Mage Casovar’s plan is a good one, and I can’t pretend it’s not just because my daughter is a part of it.”
Betrayal and despair roped through her. “Why did you never tell me this was a possibility?”
“Because, selfishly, I hoped it wouldn’t be,” he admitted. “I don’t want you to go away either, Alyx. You’re my baby girl. I want you here with me always.”
She sank into the chair, fighting tears. “What am I supposed to do about the safety of the kingdom?” she said. “Lord-Mage Casovar is wrong, he has to be wrong.”
“He’s a mage, Alyx. A very powerful one. He might be wrong about you, but there’s a good chance he isn’t.”
“My mother was really a mage?”
“Yes.”
“How could you never tell me that? Did she die because she was a mage?”
“That’s a difficult question to answer, Aly-girl.” His gaze turned distant. “I thought it best you didn’t know, and I truly believe your mother felt the same way.”
“Why?”
“Not now, Aly-girl,” he whispered, voice choked with emotion. “Someday I’ll tell you, but not now.”
Grief and fear constricted Alyx’s chest. “I don’t want to go.”
“I’m sorry. I’ve wronged you by not properly preparing you for this eventuality. It isn’t going to be easy for you, but I know you’re strong. You’ll get through it, and I’ll be waiting for you to come home.”
“When do I have to leave?”
He sighed, looking even more wretched. “Apparently the learning year at DarkSkull begins imminently, which means there isn’t enough time to travel by ship. You’ll have to leave the day after tomorrow and travel overland through Tregaya.”
“Overland?” She stilled. “That means going through the disputed area.”
“Through a very small portion of it, yes.” Garan nodded. “You’ll be sent with an escort of Bluecoats, of course, but a small unit, so that your travel isn’t taken as provocation by the Shiven. People do travel safely through the disputed area.”
She stared at him in horror. “But the day after tomorrow... so soon?”
Her father reached out to try and hug her, but Alyx tore away from him and ran from the room, sobbing. She kept running through the open foyer and up the stairs to her room, tears streaming down her face.
Chapter 4
Alyx was numb as she went down to breakfast the next morning. She’d slept little, her restless dreams filled with images of her father and swords and flames bright against a dark sky. It was almost impossible to believe that her father was sending her away, that this was to be her last day in Alistriem.
When she pushed open the door to the dining room, Lord-Mage Casovar was seated at the table with her father. Both smiled a greeting and Garan stood.
“I thought Lord-Mage Casovar might be able to answer some of your questions.” He walked over and kissed her on the cheek. “I’ll leave you to it.”
“Good morning, Lady Egalion.” Casovar gestured her to a seat. “I know this must be a shock to you. I’d like to help if I can.”
Alyx nodded as she sat down. Her stomach was tight with anxiety, so much so that she had no interest in eating anything. She said nothing for a few moments as she poured herself some tea, added sugar, and then took a sip.
“How certain are you that I have mage power?”
“Not at all certain.” Casovar gave her a faint smile. “Mage powers aren’t detectable until they awaken, so to speak. That happens at different ages for every mage, although most mages—if they haven’t awoken before attending DarkSkull—do so before the end of their first year there.”
“If you’re not sure I have power, why are you making me go?”
“Your mother was a particularly strong mage, Lady Egalion. There is a better than even chance you will be a mage too, and I believe Rionn is going to need mages.”
“Rionn hasn’t needed mages for years.”
“Perhaps not, but mages do very important work across the rest of the world, even in Shivasa. Rionn can make better use of the resources the mage order offers. Times are changing,” he said firmly. “You are going to need to accept that.”
“So if I go to this place and my powers don’t appear, I get to come home?”
Casovar smiled faintly again as he leaned towards her across the table. “Yes, if your powers have not awakened by the end of your first year at DarkSkull, it would be highly unlikely they’d ever appear.”
“Why a whole year?”
“For those slower to develop, being immersed in the atmosphere of magic created at DarkSkull helps to bring their powers out. Even then, it can take time.”
So she wouldn’t be free for a whole year. Alyx swallowed and tried to hold back her tears; she didn’t want to cry in front of this man.
“Whether your powers awaken or not, attending DarkSkull Hall won’t be a waste of time. You will learn a lot there, things which will help you the rest of your life. It’s not all bad, I promise you.”
> She nodded. Inwardly her thoughts were racing, trying to come up with a way to get herself out of this. Maybe there were other schools apart from DarkSkull Hall, possibly even one closer to Rionn?
“Why do I have to go to a school in Tregaya if I’m going to be a mage here in Rionn?”
“All mages are trained at DarkSkull Hall, which is a school overseen by the Mage Council,” Casovar said patiently, dashing her hopes. “It’s tricky to explain, but essentially, once mage students complete their training at DarkSkull, they choose whether to pledge themselves to the Mage Council or to their sovereign. In your case—particularly since you are Rionnan nobility—you would pledge to King Llancarvan and assist me with the protection of the kingdom.”
“Who do the Mage Council pledge to?” She asked the question to give herself more time to think, but it was useless. There was no logical way out she could think of, not when this was the king’s command.
“The council is an autonomous body operating across all countries. They police themselves and set the standards of conduct for all mages.”
“I see.” Despairing, she looked down at her hands. “I have no more questions.”
“Then I will see you on your return, Lady Egalion. Good luck.”
Cayr found Alyx late that evening.
After Lord-Mage Casovar left, Alyx had avoided her father and gone outside. It was a day she was supposed to be at her classes in the palace, but instead she sneaked her mare out of the stables and went riding through the palace gardens. Part of her thought if she just kept riding, stayed in the gardens, she would never have to leave.
By late afternoon she was standing alone on the southern hilltop, her mare grazing peacefully in the lush garden behind. The palace wasn’t far off, its sandstone walls glowing in the setting sun. Below, the hill descended into rolling farmland. Emerald fields were bathed in the glow of the sun, and Alyx’s gaze had been caught these past minutes by a sparkling merchant’s hall spire, outlined in the sky.
It was odd to have skipped her morning class with Luden, as it was something she’d done most days for the past ten years of her life. Today though, when she’d thought of how her classmates would flock around her as they usually did, laughing and sharing court gossip, Alyx had had to fight back tears at the thought of telling them she was leaving.
“Alyx?”
She turned. Cayr was walking towards her, looking worried. The sight of him simultaneously lifted her spirits and sent bittersweet sadness sweeping through her. She turned back to look out over the view, again fighting back tears.
A moment later Cayr’s arms came around her from behind, and she relaxed back into his warmth and love. Only now they were being forced apart was she becoming aware of how much he meant to her, how integral he was to her life.
“When do you have to leave?” he asked quietly.
“You father told you?”
She felt him nod. “Mira mentioned that you hadn’t come to class this morning. I was concerned, so I went to ask your father, who told me to speak to mine. I was furious. I think it’s the first time I’ve ever really yelled at my father. He refused to budge, he told me it was for the good of the kingdom.”
Alyx’s heart sank. Cayr had been her last hope, that he would prevail on his father to prevent her going.
“Tomorrow morning,” she answered his initial question. “According to Lord-Mage Casovar, the learning year at DarkSkull starts very soon.” She sighed. “I came out here to try and imprint this sight on my memory so that I’ll never forget it. I don’t think it’s sunk in yet that I’m leaving. It’s all happened so fast. I don’t want to go, Cayr.”
“I know.” He lowered his head until it rested on her shoulder. Cayr was usually a young man of few words. Throughout their lives, whenever she had come to him with a problem, he had always listened gravely, then simply made sure she was aware he was there for her. They stood there for a long time, then Cayr straightened and turned her to face him. Alyx heart tripped at the look in his blue eyes.
“After I finished yelling, I… I spoke to my father at length, Alyx. He says we are young yet, but in a year or two’s time, he will not look unkindly upon a betrothal between us.”
Alyx’s eyes filled with tears at the realisation of how deeply Cayr knew and loved her. He’d known that only a promise of a brighter future could keep her despair at leaving from becoming unbearable. He’d known it, and he’d done his best to procure that for her.
“I would like that,” she said softly.
“Really?” His breath puffed out in a chuckle. “I was hoping you wouldn’t be mad at me for presuming.”
“Presuming?” Alyx reached up and cupped his face. “I love you, Cayr, as my dearest friend, and in the future, my lover and husband. I could never want anybody else.”
“I feel the same,” he said and kissed her.
“Can you come and visit me?”
“Lord-Mage Casovar says they have very strict rules at DarkSkull Hall. It sounds like they prefer to isolate their students.”
“You spoke to him about it?”
“Of course.” Cayr frowned. “I wanted to learn everything I could about where he’s sending you and why.”
“I don’t want to go a whole year without seeing you.”
“Neither do I.”
“Did he tell you if he was sending anyone else with me? Jenna?”
“Yes, but not Jenna. It turns out she’s his adopted daughter, and her parents had no magic. There are two candidates who live down in the city though, twins, about our age. Casovar thinks there will be more potentials, not just in Alistriem, and will keep looking. Rionn hasn’t sent a mage to DarkSkull in years but it sounds like that will be changing.”
“You really think I’m a mage?”
Cayr laughed, eyes twinkling. “No.”
“Me either.” She sighed. “Casovar says there is a good chance I have magic, but he’s not certain.”
“He’s an experienced mage, though. If he’s sending you, he must be pretty confident. Who are we to gainsay him?”
“I don’t want to be a mage.” She winced at the sulky note to her voice.
Cayr tightened his arms around her “Well, your future will be your choice. Do as your king asks for now, but remember that when we are married, you can be whoever and whatever you wish.”
She leaned up and kissed him. “Thank you.”
Late that night, Alyx sat on the end of her bed, staring at the beautiful oak dresser in front of her. She’d left her curtains open, and moonlight shafted through the glass onto the carpet.
She couldn’t believe that this was her last night in her beloved home. She was happy here—and safe. Would this leaden feeling of despair in her chest ever fade?
“Aly-girl.” Her father appeared in the doorway, a large, empty canvas bag hanging from his left hand.
“What’s that?”
“You’re only allowed one bag of possessions at DarkSkull. You wouldn’t be able to carry your travel chest by yourself, and it’s too big anyway, so I found this.”
Alyx eyed the bag. How would everything she wanted to take fit into that? Rather than disputing this with her father—she knew it would be useless, as useless as telling him she didn’t want to go—she only looked at him mutinously.
“Have you been to DarkSkull Hall?”
“A couple of times,” he said, surprising her. She’d thought her father had spent his whole life in Rionn.
“What is it like there?”
“It’s a big place, and isolated.” He came over and settled next to her on the bed. “From what your mother told me the masters there are very strict, and training is difficult.” Garan hesitated. “I won’t lie, you won’t find it easy there. You’ll be expected to fend for yourself. No servants, no overprotective father to get you out of trouble.”
“That worries you,” she said, reading his expression easily.
“I worry that I’ve coddled you too much. You’re my baby girl, so I’
ve always done everything I could to make sure you were safe and happy and felt loved. I fear that has ill-prepared you for what you’re about to experience.”
“I’m scared,” she admitted.
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and drew her close. “Your mother was strong, Aly-girl, and I think you’ll be just like her.”
“You’re scared too,” she accused, hearing it in his voice.
His chest rumbled as he chuckled. “I’m always scared when you’re out of my sight. That’s what it means to be a father.”
“Will you come and visit me? I asked Cayr, but he wasn’t sure it would be allowed.”
Garan sighed and sat back. “I had a long conversation with Casovar on that very issue. DarkSkull rules are strict, and they forbid visitors. They prefer students to be completely immersed in their studies without outside distractions.”
“It sounds wonderful,” she said dryly.
Silence fell between them for a few moments. Eventually Garan spoke again.
“Do you want me to help you pack?”
“No,” she told him, wanting to be alone. “I’ll be fine.”
“All right.” He kissed her forehead. “But if you need me, just call.”
Alyx waited until he was gone before rising and opening the doors to her closet. As she surveyed its contents, she tried to ignore how her hand trembled against the knob.
Alyx found herself enveloped in a fierce hug by her father as they stood at the carriage door early the next morning. After another night of restless sleep, her eyes were bleary and her head ached. Her anger at her father had faded into the horrible realisation she was about to be parted from him for an entire year.
“Isn’t there something you could do?” she tried pleading with him one last time. “The king is your best friend, papa. If you went to him, told him how much I want to stay…”
“There’s no choice for either of us,” he said gently. “I’ve always taught you to be strong, to live up to our name. I need you to do that now, no matter how hard it is.”
Tears welled in Alyx’s eyes, but she tried to be brave and stop them from falling. Her father hugged her tightly again.