by Lisa Cassidy
“Do you have any further questions for me?” he’d asked stiffly.
“No, I think we’re done for today,” Tarrick had replied, just as cold. Alyx’s mouth twitched in a smile at the memory of it, although the incident had her seeing for the first time that Tarrick was no longer a youth on the cusp of manhood. At eighteen, he was very much a young man, not only an imposing physical presence with his height and muscle but with a confident and sure manner that inspired instant respect.
Eventually she left the main southern road and headed out on the private road that led to Astor’s estate. The gates were open and she galloped through, bringing Tingo to a rapid halt in a whirlwind of dust at the end of the paved driveway.
Astor was holed away in his study, thick tome in his lap, cup of tea steaming at his side when Alyx was shown in. A smile spread over her face at the familiar sight, widening at the look of astonishment on his face.
“Alyx!” He rose to hug her in greeting. “What are you doing back?”
“You haven’t heard?” she asked.
“No, I didn’t think I would see you until the end of the DarkSkull year, another couple of weeks at least.”
“Lord-Mage Casovar ordered us back early.”
“He did?” Astor lifted an eyebrow. “Would you like a cup of tea?”
She chuckled at the abrupt segue. “I’d love one.”
He rang a bell, and they chatted idly about the book he was reading until one of his maids had brought Alyx a steaming cup. She studied him while taking a sip. He was as sprightly and sharp looking as ever. In fact, he looked even better than before she left. Retirement certainly agreed with him.
“You’re not pleased about the lord-mage’s summons,” Astor noted, finally turning the conversation onto serious ground.
“I’m not pleased about the lord-mage,” Alyx said.
“May I ask why?”
“He’s arrogant, condescending and ambitious.”
Astor chuckled. “At least two of those three descriptors have applied to your own character at some stage or another.”
“I know,” she conceded. “And I do realise that, personal feelings aside, his job is to help protect Rionn. I’m trying to keep reminding myself of that.”
“You seem different.” Astor studied her. “A little older perhaps, or wiser?”
“Older, definitely.” She smiled faintly. “Not quite wiser, I don’t think.”
He shrugged. “From what I hear, Casovar seems to be doing a fine job protecting our borders.”
“Does he?” Alyx asked. “I mean that as a genuine question.”
“I don’t know anywhere near as much about the goings on of Rionn since I retired,” Astor said. “But I would have heard if he was mismanaging his job. I still speak regularly with the king and your father.”
“What about the Mage Guard?” She described what had happened with the jeweller. “And I’ve heard that wasn’t the only time they’ve been overly rough, particularly in regard to those with Shiven blood.”
“I can’t claim to know much detail on Mage Guard activities,” Astor conceded. “But I do know for certain that the spies exist. Our soldiers have died as a direct result of information being passed on troop movements in and out of the city and our barracks in the region.”
That was interesting to know, but didn’t make her feel any better about Dunnat and his louts. “That’s not an excuse for violent behaviour. Every Rionnan citizen has the right to be treated with respect until they are proven guilty of a crime.”
“Come now, you’ve seen enough now to know that in times of war we can’t always do the right thing,” He gave a little shake of his head. “Sometimes a little bad is required in aid of the greater good.”
Her shoulders sagged a little at that bitter truth. “From what you’ve said, I’m guessing you don’t take issue with Casovar being placed in ultimate charge of Rionn’s defence?”
He gave her a sympathetic smile. “It’s Casovar’s DarkSkull training and powerful mage abilities that make him a key part of our security. With the Shiven looming ever closer, I’m not surprised the king is relying on him more.”
Alyx sat back in her chair, conceding that her intense dislike of Casovar might be clouding her judgement. Astor was a wily old man—if he didn’t sense anything amiss, then perhaps there wasn’t anything majorly wrong going on. “I’m glad to hear it. I just want to help keep Rionn safe, that’s the whole reason I went back to DarkSkull.”
“Good. Now, tell me everything.” Astor leaned forward. “What have you learned in the past nine months?”
“Ugh, too much.” Alyx rolled her eyes. “If I never have to put another sentence together using Zandian verbs I’ll die a happy woman.”
Astor laughed. “Languages was one of my favourite classes. What about your magic?”
“I...” Alyx hesitated, though she wasn’t sure why. She loved and trusted Astor, as much as she did her father, but Tarrick’s voice in the back of her head warned her not to declare what she was unless she truly had to. “I struggled in that as much as anything else.”
“You’ll get there,” he said reassuringly, although she didn’t miss the tiny frown that flitted across his face. “And I’m glad to have you back home. I’ve missed our visits.”
“Me too.” Alyx stood. “I have to go, but I’d like to come back for a longer visit. I’d like to talk about my mother... I learned some things about her this year.”
“You know that you’re welcome here any time.”
“I’ll be back soon.” She hugged him, then left.
Alyx rode back to the city at a gallop as the sun lowered on the horizon—she was already late, and still had to return home to change out of her mage attire. The city streets were thronged with people, slowing Tingo to a walk.
As she waited at a busy cross-roads, she spotted the Blue Guard barracks and recognised Tijer as one of the guards on the front gates. Making a split-second decision, she turned Tingo and rode up to him.
“Lady Egalion.” Tijer straightened sharply, a warm smile belying his formal manner.
“Hi, Tijer. How are you settling back in?” she asked.
“It’s nice to be back,” he said. “Although all of us would be pleased to form your escort when you return to DarkSkull.”
“I’m pleased to hear it,” she said. “I’m looking for Dash. Can you point me to where he’s quartered?”
Tijer’s smile faded, highlighting the narrowness of his features. “Lieutenant Caverlock has been suspended from duty. We haven’t seen him since late last night.”
Her heart sank. He really had refused to apologise to Dunnat. She wondered how long it would be before he was thrown out of the Blue Guard entirely. Irritation and worry mingled in her—why couldn’t he just get over his damn anger for once?
“The orders came down from Lord-Mage Casovar,” Tijer continued. “If you see the lieutenant, please encourage him to come back. Commander Hawkwerst wants to speak with him. It isn’t good, him disappearing like this.”
“I’ll certainly talk to him if I see him.” She frowned. “While I’m here, have you heard anything more through the Bluecoats about the Mage Guard? I’d really like to know if what we encountered two days ago was an aberration. Dashan heard that maybe it wasn’t.”
“None of the Bluecoats like them much, Lady Egalion.” Tijer glanced at the other guard, just out of hearing distance on the opposite side of the gate. “But we don’t have much interaction with them. There’s a... well, I’ll be blunt. The Bluecoats are the elite guard of Rionn—soldiers from other commands tend to be beneath our attention, if you know what I mean.”
“People thinking they’re better than others for no particularly good reason?” she said tartly. “Yes, I know too well. I’d appreciate it if you could let me know if you hear about anymore overzealous spy hunting.”
“Yes, my lady.” He saluted sharply, then hesitated. “Lieutenant Caverlock, he’s a good leader and a great soldier.
It took being posted to the disputed area with him for some of us to see it, and that’s our shame. None of us like what’s happening here. Tell him that we want him back.”
“I will.”
“My lady... ” He hesitated again. “That’s not just me talking. The lieutenant has more support than he realises.”
Her regard for Tijer increasing rapidly, Alyx smiled. “I look forward to seeing you in a month or so, when we head back to DarkSkull.”
A smile crept over his face. “We’ll be ready, Lady Egalion.”
“You don’t plan to swim?”
Alyx looked up at Cayr from where she lay out on the sand. She’d been contemplating her conversations with Astor and Tijer, but had yet to come to a clear resolution. “These evening breezes are still a bit too cool for me.”
“You’ll be remembering them fondly when summer hits properly.”
“At which point I shall dive into the ocean with joyous abandon.”
He smiled and held out a hand. “Come for a walk with me?”
“I’d love to.”
The breeze, while making it too cool for swimming, was pleasant as it ruffled the skirt of Alyx’s light sundress. It was nice—freeing—to be in something other than apprentice attire.
The glow of the setting sun cast an orange glow over the water, almost like it was on fire. Shouts of laughter made her look back to where the twins were ganging up on Tarrick in the water. Dawn spotted Alyx and waved. She returned it with a laugh.
Thanks to Cayr’s Bluecoat detail, they had a section of the public beach to themselves—though none of them were unaware of the curious looks tossed their way by those outside the cordon set by the Bluecoats. It was either that or they went to the private beach below the palace, but Alyx would never again subject her friends to the sneering gazes of the other highborn youth, many of whom would be enjoying the private beach on such a fine evening. She ignored the part of her that wished her life was back amongst that world.
As she and Cayr began walking, two Bluecoats discreetly fell in behind them. A firm look from the prince had them dropping back out of earshot.
“I feel like we argued this morning, and I hate thinking you’re angry with me.” Cayr squeezed her hand. “I’d like to talk, starting with what happened with Jenna before you left.”
“Jenna is not what we need to talk about,” she said.
“The Mage Guard again?” A touch of incredulity filled his voice. “I’ve explained that to you, and I spoke to Casovar like you asked.”
“I talked to Astor this afternoon, and I agree that maybe I’ve been making a bigger issue of things than I should,” she acknowledged. “Even so, what Dash told me is concerning. I think we should do more to make sure the Mage Guard isn’t hurting innocent people.”
He ran a hand through his hair, a sure sign he didn’t want to talk about something. “I think we need to let Casovar do his job and focus on us.”
“This!” She stopped suddenly, forcing him to turn and face her. “This is our problem, not Jenna. Last year when I came home you hid things from me because you wanted to pretend everything was fine. I—"
“I hid it from you because it was nothing, it meant nothing, and I didn’t want you to—" Matching irritation flashed over Cayr’s face, his voice rising an octave as he cut over her.
“What about Dashan?” She threw the words at him, unable to keep the anger from her voice. “He was hurting, Cayr. You promised him he wouldn’t be posted to the disputed area, even though you shouldn’t have, and what happened to him up there hurt him. You ignored it, you didn’t tell me about it, and we are his best friends. We should have been there for him.”
He nodded sharply, mouth forming a tight line. “You’re right, I did hide things from you. It was wrong. I don’t know how many times you need me to apologise for it before you forgive me.”
“I forgave you for Jenna a long time ago.” And it was true. “But you’re doing the same thing now. I’ve come home and you won’t talk to me about the Mage Guard, or even acknowledge there’s a problem. Instead you want to go back to how things used to be between us. It’s like you’re hiding from everything going on.”
He took a step towards her, blue eyes blazing with determination. “I’m not hiding. I love you, Alyx. I’m trying to talk about us because I am willing to do whatever it takes to move past what I did to you last year and build our future. I will be king, and I want you as my wife and my queen. Is that clear enough?”
“How can you be so certain?” she asked, shaken and confused. Because she wasn’t—even though she’d been telling herself she was over and over. Too much had happened.
His determined expression faltered. “You’re not?”
“Cayr...” She hesitated. “While I admit I’m glad that nothing happened with Jenna, I told you when I left that we should both take the opportunity to be sure of each other and what we wanted. I didn’t just mean you—I needed the time too.”
He frowned. “The way you just said that… did something happen for you?”
She swallowed, hating the surge of guilt and confusion that came at the thought of Dashan. For the briefest of seconds she considered lying, brushing his question off. Her certainty about Cayr, about what she wanted, had been shaken, but she loved him, that was still true. But that meant she couldn’t lie—because otherwise she’d be doing to him exactly what he’d done to her with Jenna. Summoning her courage, she forced herself to meet his eyes. “Yes,” she said softly.
Hurt suffused his features. The expression tore at her, and she swallowed, struggling for the resolve to continue.
“Who?” he demanded.
“It doesn’t matter.” The last thing she ever wanted to do was ruin Cayr’s friendship with Dashan. Honesty was one thing, but there was no need for him to know this.
“What does that mean?”
“It was something like what happened with you and Jenna.” Alyx winced as the words tumbled out of her mouth before she thought them through; Dashan was no Jenna. But she couldn’t take them back, and saying anything else would only hurt him more. “Nothing came of it, and it won’t happen again.”
He swallowed, blue eyes darkening with pain. She wanted to make it right, to erase the hurt, but the words were out now and she couldn’t take them back.
“Is being with me still what you want?” he asked. “Because it’s what I want more than anything.”
“I’ve always wanted a future with you in it,” she said. “But so much has happened and we’ve both changed. I would like to take things slowly and see what happens.”
“I would wait forever for you,” he said earnestly. “And I’ll do whatever it takes, I promise you.”
She reached out and took his hand, starting to walk again. “Thank you.”
Silence fell, and she sensed he was chewing over what she’d told him. She thought about saying something, trying to explain better, but in the end decided just to let him think it through for himself.
Eventually he broke the silence, changing the subject. “Will you tell me something about your time away? Last year you were so reluctant.”
“I was,” she admitted. “And I’ll do better this time. There is one big thing I’ve really wanted to tell you.”
His soft smile returned, and some of her guilt eased. “What is it?”
“I have an older brother.” She smiled at the confusion that settled over his face. “It’s true, and he happens to be the lord of Widow Falls.”
“You’re joking with me,” he accused.
“Nope.” Her smiled widened and she squeezed his hand before turning serious. “It’s a long story, and not a happy one.”
Cayr listened patiently as they strolled along the shoreline and Alyx related everything she’d learned in the past year about her parents and her brother. Telling him relaxed the both of them, easing the tension that had built up from her admission. It felt easy again, like things had always been between them. After she finished speaking,
a long silence fell.
“That must have been difficult news to hear,” he said eventually. “Yet in telling me, you sound very calm and accepting.”
“It was more than difficult,” she said. “Had I been two years younger and still in Alistriem, it would have been one of those times I came running to you, and you would sit by me and hug me until I stopped crying.”
“I wish I had been there this time,” he whispered.
“I wasn’t alone.” Alyx’s heart ached as she thought of Dashan, and the reassurance she’d felt with his arms around her. Guilt returned, tangling her stomach in knots and killing the momentary contentment she’d felt.
“I’m glad,” Cayr said. “And I’m sorry I was upset with you this morning for wanting to spend time with your friends from DarkSkull instead of Lissa and the others. They’ve clearly been good friends to you.”
“They were very supportive,” Alyx said, the knots in her stomach twisting further as she allowed Cayr to assume it had been Tarrick and the twins who’d been there when she was most alone. And they had been, at least for some of it.
“I... ” Her words trailed off as she caught sight of four red-cloaked soldiers walking along the main street above the beach. They were moving too determinedly to be on a simple patrol, and her first instinct was to go and follow them, see where they were going and what they were up to.
“Alyx, wait!” Cayr caught at her arm. “Where are you going?”
“The Mage Guard are headed somewhere.” She pointed.
“Right. Doing their jobs.” He sounded mystified. “Come on, keep walking with me. I’ve missed you.”
Still she hesitated, wavering between her desire to walk with Cayr along the beach on a beautiful evening and her instinctual distrust of the Mage Guard. The temptation to use her telepathic magic to try and learn their intensions was close to overwhelming, and she was about to give in to it when Cayr tugged sharply at her hand.
“Alyx!”