by Staci Hart
He watched as I climbed between his legs, bending to settle between his thighs, looking up his long torso as he looked down at me. My eyes closed, and I kissed the soft skin above the elastic band of his pants. He wasn’t wearing underwear — I could feel him, rock hard under the thin cotton — and as I licked and kissed gently, I hooked my fingers in the band and pulled until he was free.
Then, I tried not to freak out.
He was bigger — much bigger — than I’d anticipated … even feeling him against me hadn’t done him justice, and I prayed to the gag reflex gods that I wouldn’t accidentally puke. Because then I might actually die of shame.
I wet my lips and swallowed hard. And then I bowed my head, hands gripping his waist, and licked up the long line of his shaft.
He let out a deep sigh, and my nerves dissipated.
I hitched myself up enough to get to his crown and spent a moment circling it before closing my lips over the soft skin, sucking gently.
This time, he pulled in a breath with a hiss.
I let him go, running the tip of my nose down his shaft, licking a line back up, flicking gently when I hit the tip. And when I kissed his crown again, I dropped down as far as I could, fist closing around his base.
One of his hands found my hair, the other clasping my hand on the bed next to his waist, and I pulled up, sucking in a breath through my nose before dropping back down.
“Oh, God, Cam,” he breathed. “God …”
I dropped down again and again, tongue rolling around the tip when I reached it, dropping deeper each time as my throat relaxed. His body flexed underneath me, his breath heavy, and I dropped down deeper still, so deep that my eyes watered. But he was close, so on I went, arching my back, humming softly until he tightened his grip in my hair and on my hand. I knew it was a warning, but I kept going until his head snapped back into the bed, mouth open as he came with a deep gasp.
The power I felt in that moment was indescribable.
I slowed, finally letting him go, and the moment I did, he reached for my arms, pulling me up to meet him for a kiss. It was a long, sated kiss of gracious thanks, and we lay there together for a long while.
When I pulled away, I propped my head on my hand and smiled down at him. “I did it.”
He laughed and reached for my hair, pushing it over my shoulder, his fingers lingering there. “Yeah, you did. I didn’t have any doubts.”
“Really? Because I did.”
“I saw the look of fear on your face and almost stopped you.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” I said.
He slipped a hand into my hair and laughed. “Me too.”
I leaned in to kiss him. “Will you sleep with me again?”
He smiled. “Yeah. But I need you to put on clothes. I don’t think I could stand having you naked all night next to me.”
I raised a brow. “Oh, so that wasn’t enough?”
“Oh, it was enough. But I can’t guarantee I won’t paw you awake in the middle of the night, and I have something better in mind for our first time.”
I laughed, blushing. “I have no argument for that.”
His fingers were still in my hair, working a lock between them. “I really am sorry I made you worry.”
“You didn’t,” I said softly. “I made me worry. You’ve done everything right, Tyler.”
“So have you.”
“I’ll settle down, I think.”
“But not too much.”
I chuckled. “Obviously. Have you met me?”
He laughed.
“Oh!” I perked up. “So everyone from Wasted Words is going bowling tomorrow night, want to go with me?”
“Sure, but I have to warn you — I’m a terrible bowler.”
“No way.”
“It’s true. You’ll see. And while we’re on invitations, I was wondering …” He paused, and my brow dropped.
“About what?”
He looked unsure of himself, which made me nervous. “I was waiting to ask — I wasn’t sure if you’d be interested in going, so I just wanted to give us a minute before I did.”
“Ask me what, Tyler?”
“I have a charity dinner to go to Thursday night. I was initially going to go alone, but now … well, I was hoping you’d be my date.”
Excitement and nerves and relief rolled through me. “Formal?”
“Cocktail.”
“I … I don’t have anything to wear.”
He looked crestfallen. “Yeah. It’s okay, you don’t have to go.”
I couldn’t stand to disappoint him and smiled, even at the prospect of going shopping. “I’d love to go with you.”
His face brightened, and I felt a million times better and worse. “Thank you. I’d hate to go without you, honestly.”
I kissed his sweet lips, quieting my nerves, pushing my past under the rug, smiling as I said, “Then I’ll be there.”
16
BADLY DONE
Tyler
THE NIGHT WAS SLOW AND easy, spent lying with Cam in my arms, talking for a while before we slept, and the next day was like any other, except that I was content, sated in life and body and soul, all together, all at the same time.
I walked in the door of our quiet apartment, knowing Cam was still at work, wishing she were home all the same. I had a few hours before I’d be meeting her to go bowling with everyone, and a small part of me wasn’t quite sure what to do with myself.
I made my way into my room and set down my bag on the bed, realizing I hadn’t slept there in days. In fact, I’d barely been in my room at all, only to change, really. And that was all I did even then, trading my navy slacks and plaid button-down for jeans and a T-shirt, which was the sum of what I needed to do to get ready to go.
I abandoned my room once again for the couch, picking up The Hobbit from where it lay on the coffee table, stretching out my legs before cracking it open.
It was amazing — Cam was right. I mean, Cam being right wasn’t amazing — she was always right. But she was right about finding a book that spoke to me. It was a strange magic, to be entranced by words, and I’d found myself devouring the novel, dog-earing pages that held passages that meant something to me, just as she had. I’d found that many she’d highlighted spoke to me too, and it almost felt like I was reading it with her.
My eyes found a quote on the page I’d left off on, highlighted by Cam in yellow: There is nothing like looking, if you want to find something. You certainly usually find something, if you look, but it is not always quite the something you were after.
I smiled to myself. It may as well have been a quote to define our relationship. I didn’t find it odd at all that her first love affair with a book would be the same as mine — we were much more alike than I think either of us realized.
Minutes after picking it up, I was immersed in the story once more. My phone buzzed, breaking my attention, and I was surprised to see that it was almost time to leave.
A text from Martin waited on my lock screen.
You up for dinner tonight?
I fired off a message in return. Going bowling with Cam and her work friends, if you want to come with us.
Will Bayleigh be there?
I smirked. Pretty sure.
I’m in.
I sent him the details on when and where, all while trying to figure out how I’d explain his showing up to Cam. I was almost positive she wouldn’t find it amusing. I, on the other hand, thought it was a golden opportunity.
I’d seen Bayleigh and Greg together at singles night, and he didn’t seem into her at all. He didn’t seem not into her, but he was about as interested in her as he was anyone else there. But watching her and Martin together was a different story all together. I knew for sure that Martin liked her, and if it hadn’t been for Cam shutting him down, he probably would have asked Bayleigh out. And if I had to bet, I’d have bet she would have said yes.
Cam would be fine — she was an adult, and so were Bayleigh a
nd Martin. It was just a bunch of friends getting together to bowl, no one was getting engaged, though I didn’t want to be the one to tell her Martin would be there.
I closed the book with a sigh and got up, pulling on my boots, thinking instead about the fact I was minutes away from picking up Cam, which was the second I’d been waiting for all day.
Cam
I made my way around the bar for the last time that evening as Beau counted his drawer behind me. The entire staff had shown up at Wasted Words for a drink before we walked to the bowling alley, and I looked around happily at everyone milling around. Rose sat at one end of the bar having a drink with Patrick, her boyfriend, her knees between his thighs as they smiled at each other. Greg and Harrison stood off by a cluster of couches, laughing, and when I turned, Bayleigh was making her way toward me with her arms full of liquor bottles.
“Here, let me help you,” I said, taking some of her haul.
“Thanks,” she said gratefully.
I nodded toward Greg. “He came.”
She smiled, her cheeks flushing, blond hair shining. “I know. He told me the other day he was planning on it.”
“Oh?” One brow rose as I imagined them walking home together, holding hands. “Have you guys been hanging out?”
She set a bottle of tequila on the shelf. “Just at work. We’ve been scheduled together a lot.” She gave me a sidelong look.
“Weird,” I joked.
She chuckled, arranging the bottles. “He’s just …” she sighed.
“Yeah. I’m pretty sure that’s an onomoto-adjective.” I sighed in echo. “I have that feeling about Tyler whenever he’s within thirty feet.”
She smiled. “I can’t wait to see you two together. Like together-together. Is it weird, being with him?”
“Kind of,” I said with a shrug. “Mostly I’m just scared to death.”
He brow quirked. “Scared? Why?”
“Because, I mean, have you seen him? I’m way out of my league right now.”
She nodded and set down a bottle of rum, adjusting it so the label was out. “Yeah. I feel the same about Greg.”
I made a face. “Don’t be crazy. You guys are great together.”
She sighed again, though this time the sound was heavy. “I don’t know, Cam. I mean, I’m still not even sure he’s all that into me.”
“I’ve seen him around you a lot lately. I mean, he walked you home the other night—”
She perked up. “And last night too.”
I nodded my agreement. “And last night too. Plus, when have you known me to be wrong?”
She still looked skeptical.
I turned her around to face the bar, and we leaned against the counter. “Look, case in point. See that couple over there?” I nodded toward Batman and The Reader, who sat next to each other, smiling.
“The skinny guy and the girl with the glasses?”
“Yup. They came in here last week, and you know how I got them together?”
“How?”
I smiled proudly. “A book. That was all it took. Sometimes people just need common ground and a little nudge. I’m the little nudge.”
“Well, you are pretty short,” she teased.
“Ha, ha. But really, though. Look at them.” We looked over — she was reading Inuyasha and his nose was in Outlander. They paused occasionally to share a line, smiling.
“They’re so cute. Good job, Cam.”
I shrugged. “It’s what I do. And when have I been wrong?”
“Never, as far as I can tell.”
I smiled and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. “So, trust me. I’ve got your back.”
She smiled back, seeming to be appeased. “All right.”
“So did you ask him about teaching you to skate yet?”
Bayleigh shook her head. “Maybe tonight, if we’re on the same team.”
“Well, we’ll just need to make sure you’re definitely on the same team then.”
She giggled, and we pushed off the counter. I made my way around to the register where Beau stood, tall and blond and handsome.
“You got all this tonight?” I asked.
He smirked. “Yup, but I’ve got you on speed dial, just in case.”
“Seriously, though, call me if you get slammed and I’ll send reinforcements. You bummed to miss bowling?”
“Not even a little. Last time I bowled, I got kicked out for sending two balls down the lane at once.”
“Why would you do that?” I asked with a laugh.
He chuffed. “The question is why wouldn’t I do that.”
I shook my head and walked out from behind the bar. “Be good, Beau.”
“Not if I can help it, but I’ll leave the bar in one piece.”
“Thanks, buddy.” I looked toward the door like I knew Tyler would be there. He walked in smiling so beautifully, and my heart did a little backflip because that smile was pointed right at me.
I did what I could not to actually bound into his arms, attempting to maintain my chill with absolutely zero luck.
“Hey,” he said as I approached.
“Hey.” I flushed, breathless as I wrapped my arms around his waist, and he leaned down — I popped up on my tip-toes to kiss him. “I’ve been waiting all day for that.”
“Me too,” he said before kissing me once again.
I beamed up at him, slipping my hand into his, and when I turned around, literally everyone I worked with was staring at us like we were a box full of puppies.
I rolled my eyes and laughed. “Show’s over, creeps.”
They groaned and shook their heads, chuckling.
Rose and Patrick stood, and Rose tipped back her glass to drain it before turning to me. “You guys ready?”
“Yup,” I answered, and she flagged everyone toward the door. And with that, we were on our way.
We walked the blocks to the bar in a pack, everyone laughing and chatting, though Tyler and I were in a little bubble, arm in arm, ahead of the rest of them by a bit. He ran me through his day, and I found myself content just at the sound of his voice and the warmth of his body next to mine.
“I’m glad your day was easier,” I said after he’d finished.
“Me too. Hopefully things die down now that Jack is back and Pharaoh is in rehab.”
“I’ve got nothing to report on my end. Just a regular day. I was on the floor all day, so it was pretty easy, just helping people find books, for the most part. I’m glad it’s over though.” My hand was in his, my thumb shifting against my ring on his pinkie. “What’d you do when you got home?”
“Read.” He started to say something else, but kept it to himself.
“That all?” I teased.
He smiled down at me, but he looked guilty. “I guess it’s not like you won’t find out in a minute anyway.”
My brow dropped. “Find out what?”
“I invited Martin.”
Now I was full-on frowning. “You what?”
He squeezed my hand. “He asked me to dinner and I invited him to come with us. I didn’t think it would be a big deal.”
Frustration prickled up, but I tried to blow it off. “I mean, it’s not. I’m sure Bayleigh and Greg will be paired together anyway, so hopefully he doesn’t have any big ideas. You didn’t put any big ideas into his head, did you?”
He opened his mouth in mock surprise. “Who, me? I’d never.”
I groaned. “Dammit, Tyler.”
He chuckled and pulled me into his side. “I didn’t, I promise. He did ask if she’d be there, though.”
“And you told him no?”
He gave me a look, and I sighed.
“Why you gotta sabotage me like that, Knight?”
“Look, if her and Greg’s love is undeniable, then it’s no sweat, right?”
My eyes narrowed. “Exactly. I just don’t want your buddy to get hurt, that’s all.”
Tyler’s smile fell a little. “I don’t want him to either. Cam, you’ve got
to leave them alone. Let them make their own decisions.”
“Even if they don’t know what’s best for them?” I argued.
His brow dropped. “Who’s to say you know better than they do? It’s their life.”
I huffed. “It’s always easier to see things clearly from the outside.”
“So you’re telling me that you know so much, you’re so right, that they couldn’t possibly know what they want for themselves? That your opinion matters more than their own?”
Disappointment waved off of him, and he let my hand go. Icky feelings rolled through me before I realized we’d reached the door to the bar. He pulled it open for me, jaw set as he waited for me to pass.
“What?” I asked, feeling ass-y as I walked by.
“What you’re doing isn’t right or fair, Cam.”
“I’m just trying to help.” The words held an edge of desperation.
“But not everyone needs your help,” he said firmly. “None of them asked for it.”
The hostess greeted us, bringing the conversation to a close for the moment, though I felt ashamed, and defensive about feeling ashamed. One hand crossed my body to circle my other wrist, turning his bracelet around and around as I tried to sort through my thoughts. Maybe he was right. Maybe I had it all wrong from the start. The uncomfortable, unfamiliar, most hated pang of disgrace shot through me.
So I took a deep breath and followed the Tyler through the bar — past the restaurant in front, the giant bar in the middle, and to the lanes all along one wall. Four lanes had been reserved for us, and I found resolve. I would give it tonight and then let it go for good.
I grabbed Greg’s arm, then Bayleigh’s, and I followed Tyler with my eyes on the prize and “Jukebox Hero” playing in my head.
Martin flanked us out of nowhere, in a bow tie again and button-down with a hoodie over top, and he looked adorable, which pissed me off even more. Bayleigh stood up a little straighter when she saw him, pushing her hair over her shoulder as a hint of color touched her cheeks. He and Tyler greeted each other, and I smiled at him in passing as I dragged the two lovebirds over to the lane where Patrick leaned over the console. His tattooed arms were propped on the surface as he and Rose tried to figure out how to set it up.